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[Poll]

Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you?


Bdsm activity is usually better for me than sexual intercourse
  44% (28)
Sexual intercourse is usually better for me than bdsm activity
  11% (7)
Bdsm activity and sexual intercourse rate about equal to me
  44% (28)


Total Votes : 63
(last vote on : 12/9/2009 6:02:32 AM)
(Poll will run till: -- )
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RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 7:25:13 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline 		Definiton of SEX as it applies to this poll question: Sexual intercourse (full on _ucking) with no bdsm activity whatsoever included.


Bdsm activity definition as it applies to this poll question: No sexual intercourse (full on _ucking) - no matter if the bdsm activity gets you "hot" or not - no actual _ucking included.


Thank for the comments(they are apt. Iam refining the choices above) and thanks for your replies to the poll.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 12/16/2006 7:41:01 AM >

_____________________________

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That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

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RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 7:37:55 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline 		gypsygirl: You're in the "rate bdsm as better than sex" camp, in my mind anyway.
Thanks for the reply, I appreciate your comments. Bdsm is the constant in your relations, not the sexual intercourse. So, for the purpose of this poll question, that's the choice I'd make (although you don't have to make one).

Note: I am not asking if one is "better" (than the other - why do people sometimes seem to think their is a value-judgment attached to questions?

Perception might be everything, though - So - for the record -I am just wondering what people think. That's all.

If someone is afraid that answering the poll question will put thier "value judgment" as far as what they consider "most" important out there for the world to see - then - they don't have to comment here below, they can just answer the poll question and not comment at all.

But - there is no value judgment about either being"better" - for just the reason you yourself stated.

That's actually why they are separate choices(!)

I enjoy reading all of the comments.

Thanks for the replies, people.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 12/16/2006 7:42:16 AM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to gypsygrl)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 7:39:18 AM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

Definiton of SEX as it applies to this poll question: Sexual intercourse (full on _ucking) with no bdsm activity whatsoever included.


Bdsm activity definition as it applies to this poll question: No sexual intercourse (full on _ucking) - no matter if the bdsm activity gets you "hot" or not - no actual included.


Thank for the comments(they are apt. Iam refining the choices above) and thanks for your replies to the poll.

- Susan


Based on your clarification, I'd have to say remove one of the votes from the "they are equal"  I can't vote for any of these.  As I said before, for me bdsm activity is always sexual and none of your choices apply to my situation.

(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 7:41:47 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
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Status: offline 		Aileen: Okay. Bdsm always involves actual _ucking for you? Always?
Because that's the "delineation point" that can help people answer the question. If it does then, you're right - maybe you can't answer the question. 

I fit doesn't then it boils down to whether or not you like bdsm activity better or vanilla sexual intercourse better.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 12/16/2006 7:45:43 AM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 7:41:48 AM   
smilezz


Posts: 2156
Joined: 6/18/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Is bdsm activity as satisfying as having sex with someone for you, usually? Or not? Is one better than the other for you - in general?

There is no b&d activity that is as satisfying as "having sex" with Thorns.
There is no s&m activity that is as satisfying as "having sex" with Thorns. 
Now here's a twister to this:  It's not as satisfying "having sex" without some type of either of these activities.  Vanilla sex does not do it for me anymore.  *shrugz*  that's just the way it is. 

quote:

Any guess as far as why (whatever choice you chose) is generally true for you? Please feel free to comment on this (if you have any ideas here).

For me.......it's that connection.  While i have a very deep connection with Thorns, the activities of bd/sm are satisfying on an outward level.  I enjoy the pain of a good thrashing, i can then internalize that and feel the surrender, the release of inward pain that may be there.  There is also a twist on this one....in a generalization of a scene....given the fact that i have played with a few people in my life, i get alot of satisfaction from it, sex never had anything to do with it.

Being satisfied from "having sex" is also a deep connection....just on another level.  There is passion....burning desire...my heart skips a beat...the closeness...that bond...that utterly fierce devotion i have for for Him....knowing that He is the only Man that i will ever have again in my life, which takes my breath away...all this plays into being satisfied sexually from Thorns. 

Anybody today can go out and scene/play with another person......have sex with another person(s).  It's different for everyone.  I've been there, done that........i now know what it's like to be completely satisfied......in both.

Happy Saturday!
~smilezz~




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(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 7:46:11 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline 		smilezz: Thank you. I really, really appreciate your response. It described exaclty why you like bdsm and why you appreciate sexual intercouse, as separate activities (and in some detail, too). That's exactly what I was hoping for (but I was pretty vague as far as asking for that, and to many that probably wans't at all clear).

Sorry, people. 

Thank you, smilezz!

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 12/16/2006 7:50:19 AM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to smilezz)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 7:46:48 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		There's no way to rate them like that. 

In fact I'd rate seeing my nephews smiling faces and hearing their laughter WAY above sex and bdsm at this point in time.

Each is what it is.  I enjoy having ALL of it in my life, so I continue to have ALL of it in my life.

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(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 7:52:09 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline 		LA: Yes, there is.
I kinda see your point, but not really.
It's a simple poll question, LA. I love my dogs (but they aren't part of the comparision criteria for the question in this thread).

It's a comparison between two things. Not between one thing and the gazillion other possible-things-people-could-ever-love equally-well-or-better-in-the-entire-universe-due-to their own idiosyncrasies. If you don't choose to answer, fine. I will see what useful comments you've made I can use to refine the question(as far as it can be refined). 

I understand what you said. I just don't know why you said it.
But - you were a Philosophy major and I was a Marketing Management major, so I do understand (and I am just teasing you. Kinda).

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 12/16/2006 8:49:10 AM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 7:54:42 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


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Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO
LA: Yes, there is.
I kinda see your point, but not really.
It's a simple poll question, LA. I love my dogs (but thjey aren't part of the cokparision criteria for the question in this thread).

In and of themselves, neither is more fulfilling than the other.  At any one particular point in time, comparing one specific instance is possible- the time I had a hot anonymous fuck with a guy in Dublin was a heck of a lot better than the time I had a dork dom threaten to cut my nipple off in NY.  But comparing the general concepts in and of themselves is impossible for me.

< Message edited by LuckyAlbatross -- 12/16/2006 7:56:03 AM >

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

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Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 7:59:23 AM   
michaelOfGeorgia


Posts: 4253
Status: offline 		i don't see a choice that i would fit into, so i guess i can't vote.

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(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 8:00:17 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline 		I think I made a caveat, by stating in general. If you cannot generalize, that's fine.
Such reasoning is the reason all polls contain a margin of error (one of the reasons, anyway).

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 12/16/2006 8:02:47 AM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 8:01:34 AM   
michaelOfGeorgia


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Status: offline 		except for those who have yet to discover things offline 

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RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 8:07:10 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline 		michaelinGA: Ha!Well, in order to answer, one has to have had 1) Sexual intercourse and
2) Some real-world bdsm experience ("heavy or light or in-between is perhaps an issue to some, but - if it's not included in the question then it's Not (an issue). For the purposes of the poll question, anyway

I understand some people's comments - but there is no such thing as a perfect poll question. I think I've made it as clear as I possibly can.

If people still can't answer, I am not sure what I can do about that. I could have a poll question with about a hundred choices in it, but it can be just as hard to interpret the results.

Nobody (as you can see) interprets a question the same way. Some read things into it that aren't there - they don't understand it. if it's a lousy question, it can be refined (which I did once already), but without changing the entire meaning, not beyond what it is now. It simply wouldn't be the question I was interested in asking in the first place. 

However, I love reading all of the comments - and some did answer. Others answered the best they could. in any case, I am interested in the comments and responses and have enjoyed reading them.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 12/16/2006 8:24:37 AM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to michaelOfGeorgia)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 8:16:19 AM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline 		To me BDSM activity is foreplay.
I do it because it makes me hot which leads to sex, so my point is, it isn't one or the other...   M

< Message edited by BlkTallFullfig -- 12/16/2006 8:18:29 AM >

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RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 8:17:04 AM   
petdave


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO
It's a comparison between two things. Not between one thing and the gazillion other possible-things-people-could-ever-love equally-well-or-better-in-the-entire-universe-due-to their own idiosyncrasies.



So i guess you don't want to hear about how satisfying a nice pepperoni pizza would be right about now, huh? Well, nevermind then

For me, this one was actually easy to answer... i find BDSM in general to be significantly more satisfying than vanilla sexual activity, and find that i have a much higher drive for it as well.

...dave

(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 8:20:42 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline 		petdave: My thanks to you for keeping it simple!! I thank you for your clear reply.
- Susan



_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to petdave)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 8:21:53 AM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline 		BlkTallfulfig: Thanks for the reply. Is there one you like better, if you consider them separately? If not, then I'd rate them both equally. I appreciate the reply.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 12/16/2006 8:23:38 AM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 8:22:17 AM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
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From: Maui
Status: offline 		right now i would be happy with either...
 
...but to answer you q, i am a fluid, and fluctuating creature...at times i want the BDSM and at other times i want the sex....
 
apples and handgrenades...

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RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 8:31:55 AM   
SlaveAkasha


Posts: 726
Joined: 9/30/2006
From: Indiana
Status: offline 		I would have to say it depends on the situation.  I have found times when the beating is enough, I am tired and worn out, and all I want to do is sleep.  I usually fall asleep with a smile on my lips and that's the end of it. 
 
There are other times when I need to just be fucked and that is it, but it's rare with Master to have "just" that and no bdsm of some kind with it.
 
I would say the combination is the ultimate for me..a good sound beating or session, followed by some hot, hard pounding sex.
 
Kasha
 
 
 

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(in reply to SusanofO)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Is Bdsm activity as satisfying as sex for you? - 12/16/2006 8:34:52 AM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline 		If I absolutely had to choose one, I would sex, because BDSM without sex would ultimately leave me feeling disconnected from my lover, and frustrated...  But as I never have to make that choice, kink/BDSM is always present in some form (even if only my mind) when I'm having sex.    M

_____________________________

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""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

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Profile   Post #: 40
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