|
AAkasha -> RE: forced masculinity (4/5/2005 11:23:37 PM)
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: GddssBella
G'evening all:
{shakes head & groans} CAN WE GET BACK TO & STAY ON TOPIC?!? Please, do us all a favor. If you have nothing productive, constructive, or supportive for THIS topic, keep your comments to yourself.
Thank you to the kind posters seeking my further thoughts on my previous post. Might as well grab a beverage, a snack & make sure you don't need to hit the potty.... This is going to be a LONG one.
"Teasing out" a male's inner masculinity is something I actually snitched from Angelika. I just liked the term so well. (#162) It must be done with grace & subtlety. Overt actions sometimes backfire & have disastrous consequences. I believe that masuclinity embraces all that is best in a man. Chivalry, courtesy, charisma, dignity, charm, wit, etc. I further believe that all males have these traits possible within themselves. It is a matter of re-introducing a male to their inner gentleman.
Nothing is so lovely to eye of many of us dommes than the physical representation of this quality. I speak not of the pretty-boy viewed on the cover of GQ, but rather the earthy, well muscled (but not freakishly so), tall, handsome, simply droolable, hunk of male pultritude that gets our panties all wet. Our individual tastes on this specimen will vary according to many factors, none of which I will pursue now. The more important aspects are what shines through from the soul, heart & mind.
Basically what I'm suggesting is more along the lines of investigation & training. If a male approaches in sincerity, seeking guidance from a domme, & she can sense a glimmer of promise lies within this person, but it currently is hidden, then it becomes an adventure to bring forth this quality. Just love a juicy challenge! The rewards are oh so much sweeter than can be imagined.
Over the years, society has unfortunately conditioned men to see the finer, more gracious aspects of gentlemanly behavior as weak, a threat to their ego & virility. Battering him down, filling his head with the ludicrous idea that emulating the virtues of by-gone eras will rob him of his strength when the exact opposite is true! I've always been amazed how many people in the bdsm lifestyle appreciate scifi/fantasy. Perhaps they wish to hearken back to days of old when men held doors or chairs for a woman, presented her with a token of affection for no reason other than admiration, defended a lady's honor, & held her upon a pedestal. To put a male back in touch with his masculinty, one must first make him recognise it; but gently, tenderly, with nearly invisible guidance & absolute support.
Along the way, many interesting side effects may occur. Invariably confidence will be built up, self image will be improved, defeating pride will be set aside, calm assurity replacing vanity. Over a significant course of time, hidden talents or skills may be revealed. Some males simply don't have enough faith in themselves prior to this re-discovery. They never know what they're truly capable of until the right woman nudges them along & opens their eyes. When it dawns on them, the effect is truly gratifying.
For example; when a male has dug deep inside & found he's worthy of love & returns it unstintingly, he blooms. Forgive the corny phrasing, but it's true nonetheless. He undertakes much more when he's so very alive. Perhaps, he never lifted a skillet before. Soon enough though, he's skimming cookbooks, magazines, what have you, to find something new & original to please you. He's found that you appreciate the effort, time & energy & so strives to impress you. Nothing more thrilling than watching a man putter around, being domestic simply because he's happy to serve. The sensual surrender under the whip or cane for your pleasure more than his own. Watching the light in his eyes as he bends his will to the fulfillment of yours.... PRICELESS.
If I've painted a pleasant picture to inspire somone & ease their way onto their true path? Then I humbly bow away & leave you with this last thought. Never give up. Never settle. The striving makes the journey worth it all....
{hops off her soapbox w/ a silly grin & waves g'night to all}
Stay safe all, play nice, & share your toys w/ others....
[:D]
Bella
Perhaps one way to bring out the masculinity in a man is to make him get involved in a competitive sport for recreation. Even a game of pick-up basketball -- the competitive nature, the physicalness of it, the sweat, the natural instincts that it brings out.
I absolutely have a fetish for hockey. 6 years ago you could not get me to go to a hockey game if you PAID ME. Then I started to pay attention -- the raw, physical nature of the sport just makes me wet - plain and simply. My husband plays hockey recreationally, and whenver I watch him compete I am so horny by the time he is finished, he doesn't stand a chance. The huge turn on about this is that his normal demeanor is level, relatively soft spoken, polite, not "overly macho" by any means. But when he is on the ice he is aggressive, competitive, physical, and unyielding.
Seeing all these physical, masculine traits come out in him is a huge turn on.
Akasha
|
|
|
|
