CreativeDominant
Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
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A great post, LA!!
Here is a problem I ran into with the last one...I've noted on here before that there was some noticeable "difference" in her relating to me in the month before she called it off, out of the blue. During that month, I kept asking her "What is going on?" and the answers ranged from "I guess I am still recovering from the surgery...I miss my child" to "work is changing in some way...I just feel tired...quit nagging, there's nothing wrong". When she ended it, it all came out...the job had become stable so she no longer wanted to relocate, she couldn't think of moving her child away, she didn't think it was fair to ask me to relocate, she had bought a house (!). When asked why all these things had not been spoken of, she stated that while she was dealing with all this, she was "realizing" that it was going to change the relationship and that began to make her feel less submissive and she thought she would get past it and didn't and now did not feel submissive to me any longer so no longer felt that she had to give any more explanation than that.
This and several things from my past are what make me wary. I am an optimist. I want to believe in people. I want to believe that there is a submissive who can find my kind of dominance worthwhile. I've had a couple. The reasons we split had nothing to do with what we felt about each other but were due to outside sources that could not be changed or fought with any hope of success so rather than end up hating each other, we let each other go. And remain friends. But everything that was going on was discussed, ad infinitum. Tis necessary.
But the last couple of experiences, my past, and seeing some of what L.A. has noted on here have led me to a wariness and caution. Which is why I stated what I stated on another thread...
I will give you what you ask for as long as you are willing to give as much. If you cannot, then don't ask me for it.
This is one reason why I have problems with the "Prove it to me" submissives and sometimes feel like returning the statement..."Tell you what...you prove to me how submissive you can be and then I'll prove my dominance". I am willing to give what I get...and am on the lookout for the first signs of something being held back...unusually quiet while at the same time noting that nothing is wrong...flying off the handle over something minor and then, when confronted with the disparity, stating that the something minor IS important but no reasoning given for why, etc.
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RE: Communication & Accountability - 
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