scottjk
Posts: 335
Joined: 4/18/2005
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I came back to review the postings in this thread and felt compelled to respond.
LaTigresse:
It's wonderful that you've been able to manage it. And I agree, there isn't any one way to treat ADHD. Back then, ADHD was relatively unknown and under a great deal of debate, even in the DVM. As a child I was diagnosed as hyperkenitic, placed in special ed, medicated (sparsely) and an attempt was made to educate me. Looking back, I learned that my mother was also ADHD, and since dad was on the road working most of the time, I rarely had much support. Add to that, my medications were rather poorly managed. If I was dosed every 3 hours or so, I probably would have done very much better in spite of the poor support at home. If mother had been treated too, life probably would have turned out very much differently, especially for the rest of my brothers. 30 years later, I have to undo all that, along with the 'gerry-rigged' coping skills I learned along the way that is, frankly, not working for me. It's wonderful to hear that you've learned coping skills, and had the support to take advantage of your gifts.
ExSteelAgain:
Doctors and professionals are scientists. They like clear boundries and specific explanations. I don't think ADD/ADHD is debatable, I think the diagnosis has BEEN debated vigorously. It's difficult to get two doctors to agree on symptoms because the symptoms tend to overlap with other disorders. Considering how complex the brain is, and the neurochemical interactions going on, the rest of the body seems like so much paper mache` and chicken wire, and considering that the brain is the 'seat' of our sense of self, it's frightening to even adress it. Part of that fear stems from not being able to examine it directly like the heart, liver, or a broken bone while it is functioning. We are forced, for the most part, to observe the brain indirectly, via behavioral observation, and considering that psychology is a science of theory, rather than fact, it is a frustrating tool indeed to employ. The best we can do is say, "The odds are that it might be this."
In terms of the idea that we over medicate, I agree. If I'm depressed from situational stress, I don't feel I need an anti-depressant, simply because I'm SUPPOSED to be depressed. I don't need a pill for that. I'll definately need a medication if things are going well and I'm down in the dumps and I can't explain it, or if things are bad and I'm way too optimistic. :)
I should note that 'hyperactivity' is a misnomer in the eyes of the layman, and is often misunderstood. From a neurologist's point of view, it's not an outward behavior, but a disorder in an area of the brain. An area of the brain is considered 'hyperactive' if it's overactive compared to normal function. 'Hypoactivity' is also diagnosed if an area of the brain us underactive compared to norma function. However, using both hyper and hypo active tends to confuse most people. In adressing ADHD, some areas of the brain are overactive while others are underactive and still others are functioning normally during different activities. That's were a diagnostitian starts to scratch his head and get's frustrated. He's coping with a vacum in terms of information. While we are mapping the brain structure and identifying what structures influence what behaviors and activities, we are only just getting started. What we have learned is that if we 'grease' up certain areas that are overactive, and stimulate areas that are underactive, we can help bring things up to what might be considered productive norms. We have quite a few drugs that target specifc areas of the brain, and some that affect all of the brain, but only certain chemical functions. Those of us that cope with psychriatric disorders, have to treat ourselves, experimenting with drugs with a doctor along side providing knowledge and support. We often do research on what drugs have what kind of effect, and ask our doctor to prescribe to us a working supply so that we can work as our own apothocary. Now, that doesn't mean we all build up our own private pharmacy, some just need small doses of very few drugs, while others need a large array of medications and suppliments.
fawne:
Thanks fawne! Good girl for that link! ADD/ADHD does has advantages, however, not everyone with the disorder has the same advantages. Just like individuals, we excell and do poorly at different things.
goodpet:
For me it's "I'm the mast....OOOOHHH! Shiny!"
MasterGlitch:
I'm sorry, but you're way off base. ADD/ADHD people suffer socially, and it translates to financial problems. They demonstrate a neurological lack of self control in terms of impulsivity. It's not severe, but it's enough to cause problems at work, in relationships and the social environment. I'm a textbook example of that. I often acted out impulsively throughout my school years, angry that no one would see things the way I do. Kids often pushed my buttons for amusement. Later on when I joined the work force, I often got into arguments with coworkers, failed to complete tasks, and frankly aggrivated my employers. I often felt that life was unfair and felt that everyone was amoral. My career and income spiraled into the ground. I'm VERY good at what I do, but in terms of social skills, I sucked, big time. I have almost NO friends (two at last count). Over the years, I've lost my extrovert qualities and became introverted, compounding the problem. Most people don't understand that good social skills are more important than hard skills. People with solid social skills accomplish more, earn better salaries and often have better relationships than those with poor social skills. Top that off with difficulties in education, and you've got a great receipe for failure. Granted, ADHD is a handful of letters, but it has a significant impact on a person's life, and yes, even survival. I have a disability, I want it to be recognised so I can get some kind of accomodation and understanding. I don't want sympathy or pity, just acknowlegement of both my weaknesses and strengths.
You should take time to be better informed before commenting. People with ADD/ADHD have exceptionally developed empathy towards others. It some cases, it's a handicap all by itself, we stick to a relationship LONG after they should have left. We have an overdeveloped desire to help and nurture. We almost experience physical pain when we discover or realise we have done or said something to harm another, physically or emotionally, (especially, in this lifestyle, without intent or consent). To put it simply we tend to be devestated. I cannot believe that any dom that has a sub dependant on them would just walk away due to lost interest without first attempting to adress the dependancy issues. Further, I would most likely believe that such a dom would adress such a thing up front, in the event he must leave suddenly for whatever reason.
People, especially doms, with ADD/ADHD are not as distractable as you seem to imply. We don't wander around constantly, following the next shiny thing that grabs our attention. We just simply have difficulties in staying on task, or moving on to the next task, or staying organized, or struggle with impulsivity. We are highly capable of providing stability, more than most, we just have trouble with the tasks involved that provide that stability.
Please, read up on ADD/ADHD, especially for adults. You've expressed some misconceptions that you should adress.
LotusSong:
I'm dissapointed. "Master, master thyself" is circular logic. It ranks right up there with self-help programs that tell you what you should do, but doesn't provide details on the how. Getting one's ducks in a row is all well and good, but if you don't know when there are enough ducks lined up, you don't know when to declare victory and move on, let alone know how they should be lined up. The best advice I often give to 'new' doms is this: Be observant, trust your empathy and don't be afraid to ask for help. Insofar as my self assesment as a dom? Of course I wouldn't want to be dominated. People have tried to dominate me all my life and I hate it, but I love to be the dominant, it feels as natural as breathing to me. However, I have the intelligence to dominate with empathy and wisdom and understand that there is no set formula to follow. I also understand based on my life experience that with power comes responsibility.
Everyone:
I'd like to offer my thanks to everyone that has given me encouragement and support. It means a lot to me. It's also given me perspectives that I haven't considered, and it's also given me ideas as well.
This discussion has also pointed out another hurdle that I must try to learn to navigate. Ignorance about ADD/ADHD. People that post in regards to topics tend to do so because they have some knowlege or experience regarding it and have something to offer. Those that don't tend to just read about it and not bother posting. It illuminates the problem of what to do about jobs, relationships and family. Most with ADD/ADHD need some kind of accomodation in order to do well, on the job or in a relationship, the trick is to ask for that accomodation without making it seem like a burden on others. I HATE asking for help simply because I'm concerned about the burden it my place on some one. But, I also do understand that it's a neccessary thing.
Not an easy thing to do...
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RE: I'm an ADHD Dominant - 
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