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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 9:29:43 AM

Venusflames

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From: Worcestershire (UK)
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My favourite pupil was a rascal and would question everything and always had a good answer ready for when she was found doing something she should not. She was like a breath of fresh air. However, could I get her to write anything down???? Could I eck! She hated it with a vengence, as all letters were scrawled and unreadable. She was obviously a bright and intelligent girl who had dispraxia. (She would fall over a lot too, a bit like the class clown).

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 9:59:41 AM

juliaoceania

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Joined: 4/19/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass

I'm sure this topic has been covered before, probably many times. I'm just curious (inspired by a recent thread with some really incoherent typing...)

How does the way someone communicates online affect the way you "see" them? Do you ignore typos, incorrect spelling, or grammar mistakes because it's just not that important? Or does it turn you off to someone completely when they don't seem to have a firm grasp on the language - or on their keyboard?

It would depend on what the person has to say. Instant communication via email and messenger is a breeding ground for run on sentences, typos, and incomplete sentences. I do not judge a person's intellect based on these things. Now if every other word was misspelled or the thoughts presented lacked critical thinking it would probably impact my view of the person. The more simplistic a manner a person communicates an idea, the easier it is to obey the rules of grammar and spelling. I would prefer to have someone make typos and a few run ons than get an email full of "See dick write an email, write dick, write." or "Will you go steady with me?"...smiles

edited for my own word usage problems

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 1/3/2007 10:07:21 AM >

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Post #: 22

RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 10:27:59 AM

DominaSmartass

Posts: 961
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: This month? Maryland
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quote:

ORIGINAL: julietsierra

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass

That doesn't mean I can't still express my distaste at being presented with something by a grown adult who doesn't know how to spell words we learned in elementary school. I also know many people with learning disabilites and dyslexia and I SWEAR none of them are as bad as the people who type on this forum sometimes. I went to a special high school in fact, where I was surrounded by people with one form of learning disability or another (mine happens to be in math) and since I tutored many of my peers and also proofread and edited their papers, I consider myself familiar with and tolerant of those things. It was very common to see someone mistake words like there and their or here and here but it was not at all the norm for students' papers to read like a 4th grader using the hooked on phonics or "huked on foniks" as they might write it, system. There's my rant for the day.

Just because it was "not at all the norm" for you doesn't mean that the people who have difficulties don't exist. There are some on these boards. I work with people who are significantly impaired when it comes to their spelling abilities.

I recently asked someone if all the teaching anyone ever did and all the self-teaching he ever did on himself had any effect on his ability to spell. His answer: "No. Not a bit. Not at all. For some people phonics sometimes works, but not for everyone."

And the man is brilliant - and in charge of other teachers.

There are presidents of universities that are dyslexic. There are CEOs who are dyslexic - and some of these CEOs are in charge of large well known companies. They are by no means, slackers when it comes to intelligence - even if they can't spell words that most people learned back in elementary school.

Look at 100 people with dyslexia and I can pretty much assure you that you will find 100 different manifestations of dyslexia since it is an umbrella label and not a description of specific difficulties. Flipping ds and bs are just one manifestation. Being unable to set up sentence structure in a "proper" form is another. Being unable to discern one homophone from another (like gait and gate) is another. The inability to differentiate between two similar words (Harry and Larry) is another, and sometimes someone's dyslexia encompasses ALL of these things - including the inability to recall grammatical rules and their myriad of exceptions.

Furthermore, in studies of dyslexic people it's been found that their brains process about 4 times faster than what is considered "normal." This means that they're certainly not stupid by any means, and if their ability to write could keep pace with their ability to think, it's US who would be considered to be "disabled."

When it comes to spelling though, instead of seeing the word in their heads like most of us learn to do, they see the picture, and then have to sort through things to find the word for what they see, then try to remember how to spell that word, and THEN get it down on paper. Meanwhile, they've just seen 5 more pictures in their heads. An analogy to what they're required to do that we do without even thinking is akin to rubbing your tummy and patting your head at the same time. Some people can, most people can't.

Test yourself. Go watch the movie "Man on Fire" and give a detailed description - in writing - of just one of the scenes that they present in time-lapse photography before the next scene shows up. You'll get just a TASTE of what a dyslexic goes through on any given day.

So, while it may not have been the norm *for you* to have seen this in your school, that does not say that these situations don't exist for others, and relating EVERYTHING you see in terms of only what you know without regard to the possibilities creates a very small world indeed.

But you're absolutely right...there's nothing out there that says you can't express your "distaste." However the fact that someone's disability is "distasteful" to you says an awful lot. What a shame that "your poor brain" might have to be subjected - even for a short amount of time - to someone else's disability. I feel for you. I really do. Then again, as those people with this disability work hard to make things easier for "your poor brain," I wonder, how their brain feels...

juliet

I completely agree. You don't have to try to convince me of anything or insult me or feel sorry for me. What I refuse to believe however is that such a huge proportion of collarme posters are that severely affected by dyslexia.

(in reply to julietsierra)

Post #: 23

RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 10:35:40 AM

thetammyjo

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I treat online communication as I treat my students writing -- if I can understand the point and see the evidence, then it is well-communicated.

Since I have dislexia I would be a hypocrite to judge people by criteria I have difficulty with myself, both on here and in the classroom.

Typos, confused thoughts from time to time are the result of writing as you think. I expect most people online are writing as they think -- I doubt most of us have tons of free time to practice writing each comment we wish to make and have an editor look at it. That's the level of writing I'd expect from my students in class (not for a take-home assignment or a research paper where there is time to edit and revise).

People who use a lot of online symbols or text-messaging symbols, folks who insist on using their particular ritual language, and those who just plain write in one big unending sentence may be difficult to read. Capitalization, punctuation of some type, and paragrahps are very helpful in aiding the reader so he/she can figure out what you are trying to say. People still argue about grammar and spelling where I'm at (the university) so I say attempting to make it easier for your reader to understand is more important than being perfect.

Of course I'd be a hypocrite to say otherwise given my own writing. I'd rather be almost anything else in this world than be a hypocrite.

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(in reply to DominaSmartass)

Post #: 24

RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 10:46:37 AM

SusanofO

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Well I do understand how bad typing and poor grammar could drive someone a little batty when I comes to internet communication. Personally, I am a terrible typist. I never took a typing class, and sometimes wish I had. I know "spell-check" exists, etc., but when I am typing to communicate with someone, I have to make a very, very conscious effort to slow down my typing - or it just looks like a second-grader wrote it. I think I type fast, because I expect to be able to type as fast as I am thinking - and in reality, that just isn't gonna happen. If I am tired, it just gets worse. But - the essence of what I am usually trying to communicate is usually fairly intelligent and includes proper grammar.

So I guess I am saying, sometimes, it might pay to cut someone a wee bit of slack in this area, depending on the other circumstances, of course. It might not be that they are stupid, lazy or un-educated, maybe they are just a really bad typist. Of course, some people are stupid, uneducated and-or lazy. If it really drives you crazy, then I'd gently say something to them about it such as: "I'd understand what you are trying to tell me better if you would slow down and think it through, and type correctly. It would help me to see you in your best light" - or something like that. Just a reminder note from a terrible typist, is all...thanks for listening.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 1/3/2007 10:55:28 AM >

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Post #: 25

RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 10:48:58 AM

DominaSmartass

Posts: 961
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: This month? Maryland
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Just a general comment on perfection: A lot of people seem to have taken my criticism of incoherent writing as a statement that each post should be a perfectly composed English composition. This is not the case. I make as many typos as anyone (I am anal about them so I usually catch them and change them because it bugs *me* but that's beside the point...) I was only asking if the way someone "speaks" online influences how you think of them. I think the answer is unequivocally "yes". And I don't only mean that poor writing reflects poorly on people either. For example, I'm sure that there are more than a couple of people on here who now think I am a pretentious bitch because I do care about my own way of writing. When it comes to myself, I am a perfectionist. For other people, I really appreciate writing that is clear and to the point, well thought out, and relatively easy to understand. It's when those elements are missing that I begin to get frustrated.

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 26

RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 10:52:42 AM

SusanofO

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Joined: 12/19/2005
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Well, I agree with you, I think it does, consciously or not. At least for me, and I am assuming it does for many others as well (which is why it bothers me when I make a lot of typos - I really realize how bad it can look).

- Susan

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That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 11:30:12 AM

MmakeMme

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Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NC
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Grace with the written word is not everyone's strength. It would be foolish indeed to discount someone's thoughts based on proper grammar and punctuation. My high water marks are the other's intent, level of respect, and indication of politeness.

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 11:59:45 AM

mystiquenz

Posts: 330
Joined: 8/13/2004
Status: offline

For myself typos annoy me, but i try and be relaxed, however some days I appreciate that our fingers do not correspond with our brain!

So i let it go ... and hope that maybe the person on the other end of the keyboard is not as dense as they appear to be in the written word. Thinks collarme could have a *spell checker* facility!

We cannot all be strong communicators both orally or written. Maybe we all just need to "chill out" before we read the forums. lol ...

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 12:10:57 PM

MistressSassy66

Posts: 1675
Joined: 11/5/2004
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I have to say its the quality of whats being said.
I am also not a fan of the big bright writing and do skip them unless something catches My eye.

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 12:39:38 PM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
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Actually, what I appreciate most on here is paragraphing, short quotes rather than entire essays with 14 responses (Usually followed by "I agree." Just shut it) and generally thinking a bit more than "duhhhhhh, world needs me hear."

That, folks, can be left to me, thank you very much.

Yours,

benji

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 12:51:54 PM

SweetDommes

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Joined: 10/5/2004
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*fast reply*

I have dyslexia - most people don't know this because I have a number of ways to compensate, the main one being that I have forced myself to go back and proofread at least 2 times before hitting the post or send buttons. Mistakes still get through sometimes, but I have made the effort. I also use spell check programs, and when typing something important (like a term paper when I was still in school), I ask someone else to proofread it for me. I know many others who have dyslexia worse than I do, and they all manage to type in a coherent fashion.

As LA pointed out, this is a medium of communication that is based entirely on the written word. I dislike having to translate from gibberish to english. I'm not fond of having to translate from german to english, but at least that I can do without getting a headache. The occational typo is one thing, however, someone who has obviously made little to no effort to correct spelling/typing errors, or who uses netspeak *shudder* is going to make a bad impression on me. I have dismissed boys from consideration because reading their messages gave me a headache - I actually got publicly flamed on another site for telling someone that if he couldn't use a spell check program and at least a few periods in his typing, that I wasn't interested in him even as a friend. Apparently, he was offended by my requirement for at least half-coherent messages and felt that I should lower my standards (and endure headaches) to placate him.

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 1:26:38 PM

spankmepink11

Posts: 1310
Joined: 9/28/2005
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Collarme actually does have a spell check option. I'm not sure whether it's available for the email side, but it is here in the forums. It's located on the second line up from the text box, the last item on the line. It's an ABC and a check mark.
I was posting for a year before i found out it was there.

As to the OP's question, I judge my own typos and grammatical errors far more harshly than i judge others.

(in reply to SweetDommes)

Post #: 33

RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 1:28:24 PM

windchymes

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Joined: 4/18/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: julietsierra

quote:

ORIGINAL: sleazy

I also regularly communicate with people who do not have english as a fist language, and one of my favourite friends is actually dyslexic.

Ok, now that's just darn exciting!!!!

*fanning myself
juliet

I call that a "Freudian Typo"

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RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 1:59:12 PM

Focus50

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
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quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

quote:

ORIGINAL: julietsierra

quote:

ORIGINAL: sleazy

I also regularly communicate with people who do not have english as a fist language, and one of my favourite friends is actually dyslexic.

Ok, now that's just darn exciting!!!!

*fanning myself
juliet

I call that a "Freudian Typo"

I call it "hot tea all over my keyboard and monitor" - cracked me right up! lol

Focus.

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Post #: 35

RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 2:07:29 PM

Focus50

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass

I'm sure this topic has been covered before, probably many times. I'm just curious (inspired by a recent thread with some really incoherent typing...)

How does the way someone communicates online affect the way you "see" them? Do you ignore typos, incorrect spelling, or grammar mistakes because it's just not that important? Or does it turn you off to someone completely when they don't seem to have a firm grasp on the language - or on their keyboard?

Not at all; communication is understanding what the other says - or writes.... Some people have excellent oratory, spelling and grammar skills but never seem to get to the point or express their thoughts so well - they're more difficult and exasperating to communicate with.

Focus.

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Post #: 36

RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 2:13:57 PM

sleazy

Posts: 781
Joined: 11/23/2006
From: UK
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quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

I call that a "Freudian Typo"

Isn't that where you say one thing and mean your mother?

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RE: Judging someone on-line by the quality of their com... - 1/3/2007 2:23:46 PM

aSlavesLife

Posts: 347
Joined: 12/1/2006
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Yes, it does make a difference on many levels of how I perceive someone through their writing. I also take into consideration regular run of the mill typos because we all make mistakes but incoherence, poor knowledge of grammar, sentence structure and people who refuse to add periods or commas I do not have patience for at all. I do take into consideration when someone does not have English as a first language, and in fact some of these people write more coherently than people who do have English as their first language. It is very painful to read someone who is an adult that writes like a second grader and it's not limited to the forums because there are profiles that are simply atrocious when it comes to grammar and punctuation. There are mediums available such as on-line dictionaries and spell check to use. When someone doesn't take the time to use it, I look at it as a form of laziness, ignorance and plain stupidity.

There are those that have talked on here about their disabilities before and those individuals I am not referring to at all. It's the people that have acknowledged more than once they are bad spellers and have done nothing to correct their writing. To me that shows a lack of respect to other readers on this board and an overall laziness on their part. How hard is it to know the difference between words like: here and hear or see and sea or there and their etc. We all were supposed to have learned this in elementary school and it makes me wonder if some of the members here were just pushed through the system or never bothered to learn.

I also feel that when subs, male or female that are in a D/s or M/s relationship that spell on these forums badly reflects on their owners or partners as well. My owner would never in a million years let me post some of the spelling and grammar atrocities I have read on these boards. Just my opinion.

(in reply to windchymes)

Post #: 38

RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 2:27:41 PM

blushingflower

Posts: 144
Joined: 10/11/2006
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Whether or not I even reply to an email is dependent on the quaility of the communication. My mother was an English teacher and my Dad's the kind of guy who writes letters to the paper correcting their grammatical errors.
I'll forgive certain typos, but there are certain things that will generally set me off. I also pay attention to content, too, but in my experience, the best content is usually accompanied by good grammar.
It's probably shallow of me, but it got me my Daddy, so who cares?

(in reply to DominaSmartass)

Post #: 39

RE: Judging someone online by the quality of their comm... - 1/3/2007 2:33:46 PM

Adrenochrome

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Joined: 12/27/2004
From: Canada
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Being an English scholar, I'm somewhat biased.

In general, if someone has a learning or functional disability, I won't hold their errors against them. But if they're just not willing to use proper grammar, spelling, or clear forms of argumentation, I tend to skim their posts rather than read them.

This is a text-based medium, after all. The form of our communication is just as important as the content.

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Post #: 40

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