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RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 4:49:05 PM

Devilslilsister

Posts: 1262
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline

Its the whole strip club thing. Why can i drive down a street and see 4 female strip clubs on it and no male strip clubs? On top of that around the corner is hooters and a whole bunch of other places...

Why is it in the porno industry they'll pay a girl hundreds of dollars to do a film but will not pay the male actors? Generally speaking here, if you've a massive slong - i think they do pay. Pretty much, they dont.

If Master wanted to go to a strip club he'd have several to choose from and if i wanted one i'd have to search high and low.

Why do i see female protitutes litter the roads and yet to find a male one its more of a search?

hmmmmmmm whats up with that? Why are all these men running around paying to see women naked, give lap dances, and have sex?? Ummmmm cos thats the way the industry works. (double duh)

Probably the same reason why, when a man walks into a bar he has to "work" to get laid and a girl can walk in and say "i'm horny!!" and 5 guys appear out of no where trying to buy her a drink.

yeah and like where do i go if i want to find a Pro Dom? Why do i have to put effort into locating a professional and for you its just a simple click away? Is THAT right?

Its just the way the world works and i'm not going to get my panties in a twist because the industry is geared towards men and its not "equal" for us women.

so um nanner

< Message edited by Devilslilsister -- 1/13/2007 4:52:08 PM >

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(in reply to Stephann)

Post #: 61

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 5:03:23 PM

TexasMaam

Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: subslaveb0y
I hope to see, as time goes on, more *true dominants* to emerge into the scene. If these individuals are intelligent and sophisticated -- as I require in a dominant -- they might already possess the means to support as many slaves as they desire, without resorting to anything illegal. To date, I seen very few profiles along these lines.

"To date, I seen very few profiles along these lines"...

"To date, I seen"

*chortle*

I'd hazard a guess that you won't be meeting very many 'high end' Dommes using such grammar.

*cackle*

TM

_____________________________

~ My opinions are not necessarily those of the management... ~

(in reply to subslaveb0y)

Post #: 62

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 5:15:12 PM

orfunboi

Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: subslaveb0y

I wrote a big long response message to this, but she blocked me before I had to respond (last word syndrom, I believe). Rather than waste it, I thought I'd post what I wrote on this board, in case anyone is interested or wants to provide feedback. I've used this website for a while now, and I frequently read the board, but I've never posted, so I guess I can compensate now by posting the following overly long response:

The whole reason I tend to emphasize developing a l/t, meaningful relationship is that I want to distinguish myself from those some subs who just want a cheap thrill or "a quick, easy way to get off." That's specifically what I don't want to be portrayed as...

That aside, are you really going to defend those dominant females seeking "generous money pigs" or "pocketbook slaves"?

Yes, as long as there are people out there that seek them.

What they seek is illegal and is specifically against the rules of this website. They threaten the very existence of this website and are harming the d/s community. Who cares whether some guys get off to it? They're part of the problem as well.

I'm sure the mods can handle any TOS violations.

I don't really have a problem with pro domination -- as you said, these people might need specific equipment -- not to say, though, that someone needs all kinds of fancy gadgets to dominate. There's a website, frugaldomme.com, that might interest you, that proves my point.

If you don't want to see a pro, that's fine, don't see one. But don't start telling them what kind of equipment they should be using. There are men out there who like the hot outfits and nice toys, why are you trying to ruin life for them?

There's something subtly contradictory in there being so many individuals seeking "financially secure" live-in slaves. If what these dominants truly seek is just a slave, someone to serve them 24/7, why does it matter whether or not this slave has a nice portfolio? THAT is what is actually amusing here -- the original notion of a slave is basically someone who has no money, who is owned by someone with a lot of money -- not the other way around.

So they should become a support system for unemployed slaves? Sorry, but people have a right to expect prospective partners to be self supporting, if that is what they want. I sure as hell would not hook up with someone who could not support herself and I wouldn't expect someone else too.

I hope to see, as time goes on, more *true dominants* to emerge into the scene. If these individuals are intelligent and sophisticated -- as I require in a dominant -- they might already possess the means to support as many slaves as they desire, without resorting to anything illegal. To date, I seen very few profiles along these lines.

Try getting off the internet and going out into the scene, there are a lot of *true dominants* out there. Although few male or female that I've met want a houseful of slaves they have to support.

Not that owning a slave should really require that much funding, again... that's what's really laughable here... the whole notion of a slave is someone on whom you spend as little money as possible to support his or her existence... otherwise, people would never have used slaves in the first place!

Do you pay bills? Own a home?

I don't know... do I really seem that unreasonable here? It is pretty funny, in the end... strange times.

Yea, you do.

(in reply to subslaveb0y)

Post #: 63

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 5:33:56 PM

orfunboi

Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: akbarbarian

My opinion is that men put up with alot of crap in general, due to there being more options available to the average female for a partner. Guys will hump the leg of most any woman, the stupid horny fuckers. What that does, is get across the idea that men will accept any crap treatment. Until we have some standards of fairness and consideration, those used to exploiting will continue to exploit. I don't expect the whole of mankind (used to refer specifically to males in this case) to develop higher standards, but I can sure decide to do it myself and set the boundries and requirements forth that I need. I'm fine with pro doms and subs, but the idea that a woman should be able to charge where a man shouldn't rankles me.

I've never heard anyone say a guy couldn't go pro and start charging. Not sure how successful he will be though. I know several men that happily pay for pro services, but I have yet to meet a girl who would. Maybe it's about supply and demand.....

(in reply to akbarbarian)

Post #: 64

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 5:37:05 PM

LadyLupineNYC

Posts: 618
Joined: 12/14/2006
From: NYC
Status: offline

There are ProDoms, in fact, one has posted on Professional Servies on here in just the past few days...the ones I know of mostly cater towards male clients, but I am sure they get female clients too....

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"I have been looking for a way to serve the community that incorporates my violence..."

(in reply to orfunboi)

Post #: 65

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 5:46:55 PM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

I think you've over-simplified here. Things are changing and very different from from relationship to relationship. Twenty years ago, there were very few house-husbands, but look at how abundant they are today! My former Mistress/spouse is a senior executive at a Fortune 400 company here in Dallas. While we were economically "equals" when we began our relationship, I sacrificed my career numerous times to support hers, including moving from Michigan to Dallas. I really think the economic control and balance is changing, particularly on an individual basis

Pixel- I will have To respectfully disagree. They only "appear" to be changing. The male attitude remains the same. You are a rare bird then :) Pilosie is a prime example. She penetrated the marble ceiling.. but even on here.. she was called the typical derrogatory names. No matter how far we come.. men will defend their "natural order" position within their Good Old Boys Club mentality.

Even Oprah..no matter how much she has accomplished.. I bet she still gets the "big slur" muttered behind her back. It hurts.

I guess you gotta be in the shoes to recognize it. JMO

_____________________________

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I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to pixelslave)

Post #: 66

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 5:47:31 PM

orfunboi

Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

The question then becomes are they even dominant(does it even matter) or is this just a way to bring in some stupid sub johns and extract some cash for their services? I don't recall seeing too many profiles of Doms requesting "tribute" from their female subs.

Nope, I don't recall seeing them either, course I don't read male dom profiles. Now out here in the real world, I can think of 4 male dom's (just off the top of my head) who have never uttered the word tribute, but also seem to have a real hard time keeping themselves employed. For the years that I have known them, they have basically lived off their female submissives and pissed and moaned about how hard life is. I don't know any female dominants who have this difficulty staying employed, but maybe I'm not looking hard enough.

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 67

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 5:52:26 PM

orfunboi

Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

Can we beat this dead horse anymore?

Yes, but soon we will need new floggers....

and that costs money.....

So I think we should charge someone for it....

I'll go open the paypal account.

(in reply to Lashra)

Post #: 68

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 6:15:07 PM

orfunboi

Posts: 1223
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

Yea, there have to be some women out there, but i still think the guys have 'em outnumbered.

(in reply to LadyLupineNYC)

Post #: 69

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 6:35:59 PM

dawntreader

Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: orfunboi

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

Can we beat this dead horse anymore?

Yes, but soon we will need new floggers....

and that costs money.....

So I think we should charge someone for it....

I'll go open the paypal account.

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_____________________________

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(in reply to orfunboi)

Post #: 70

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 6:45:14 PM

IWantToPunish

Posts: 18
Joined: 9/6/2006
Status: offline

I would like to start by saying that was my message that I had sent to him. Like it says in my profile I am not a Pro ( the thing about gifts is a joke for those of you who don't get it ). I find it funny how he can put up what I said, but I didn't see anything about what he said first, so I will fill all of those still interested in. In one of his first messages, he wrote how he wanted a long term relationship and when I wrote him back saying I did not want anything serious, he replied back with something to the extent of saying that he really didn’t want anything serious ( complete opposite of what he said in his first message ) along with the rampage about Pros and the other filth that are in this lifestyle ( I can not remember his exact words) He did not just make a comment about "gold diggers", I got a FREAKING STORY. I was merely pointing out that not all of the Dominants ( male or female ) who charge are only in it just to get money. Many have valid reasons, which I had explained in the message he so graciously posted. I see absolutely nothing wrong with Pros or what they do. I have talked to a few and they seem like very nice people. To call them things like gold diggers and whatever else he had said about them pissed me off. Who the hell is he to condemn other people and the choices they make? I have actually met a handful of men who enjoy being "blackmailed" or "forced" to give money. And, in my defense, I blocked him so I would not have to deal with him and his close mindedness.

(in reply to BRNaughtyAngel)

Post #: 71

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 7:39:03 PM

DominaSmartass

Posts: 961
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: This month? Maryland
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

Well, to make a long story short. As usual his kink had to take over and he began pushing. First it was little hints like, "you could make ALOT of money" then the questions got more and more sexual. Finally, I got tired of the constant nudging from him and having to remind him "lesbian!" which of course he knew allllllllll along. Sooooo, I just decided to give him a task. Give me a list of ways (which he had said existed from the beginning) in which he could serve me. I also specified non-sexual. Several days went by, he was not online much, when he was he had excuses for not writing it, kept going back to money and sexual innuendos. Finally I gave him a deadline.

Guess what?!?!? I have not heard from him since.

So, you tell me who propagates the money for kink issue?

Wow...I think we might have met the same guy. A few months ago I was contacted by someone who flat out told me that his biggest kink was to be a money slave. I am not a pro and I have never "charged" to play with someone, but I will certainly accept a sub taking me out to dinner or giving me a present, when I've known him long enough that I feel comfortable enough. I do not accept gifts lightly. Anyway, this guy just begs, and I mean BEGS me, to "abuse his wallet" to "rape his bank account" blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I finally thought, "what's the harm?" and being a young college grad and broke I let him. He sent a decent amount of money, the amount I earn in about 20 hours at my job, so it was nice. And that was over a period of a few different days where he would come to me and beg to "tribute" again (and god I hate that word.) Besides just sending me money on paypal he was also great for conversation, he was very highly educated and wellspoken, so I did enjoy getting to know him. But after a couple of weeks he seemed to disappear. Only to come back a couple of days ago to tell me how much he missed tributing me. Arg.

My main objection is that there are so many pros on collarme who are using what is supposed to be a free, dating/personals site to run their business. There are plenty of places for them to advertise and collarme even has the paid ad lniks on the sides. But it seems an abuse of this site to pose as someone seeking a relationship when they really want someone to pay their bills.

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 72

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/13/2007 8:03:17 PM

MistressSassy66

Posts: 1675
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline

I didnt read all the posts and all I'm going to say is that at the bottom
of the Main Forum page is a place for PRO'S to advertise.
I'm guessing you had no idea that Pros are WELCOME here just as you are as long as WE(meaning everyone) abides by the TOS.

Okay biting tongue and moving on.

_____________________________

Mistress Sassy

http://www.mistresssassy.com

In the Immortal Words of Bob....Fuck the dumb shit.

"I love you not only for what you are,But for what I am when I'm with you."- Opening line from a poem by Roy Croft

(in reply to BRNaughtyAngel)

Post #: 73

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/14/2007 1:52:41 AM

julietsierra

Posts: 1841
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

I was contacted once by a gentleman looking for someone's house to clean. He said he wanted to be treated like the servant he was.

Now, I'm submissive, but I know a thing or two about directing housekeepers. I've had them in the past and can't afford them now. Let me tell you how tempting he was!

I told him that if he cleaned my house and didn't do it the right way the first time, hoping for some sort of punishment, I'd punish. I'd send him home.

So he took a different tact. Suggested that if he did the work correctly vs incorrectly, then instead of punishing him for incorrect actions, perhaps I could reward him for the things he did right. Maybe I could take him shopping, and we'd walk through the mall while I directed him on what to buy for me. He'd buy it - with his money, not mine - and carry all the packages as he walked behind me.

Oh! I can DEFINITELY say I had a very difficult time turning him down! Cleaning my entire house and then, as a reward for his hard work...he'd buy ME things? hehehe...oh yea.. I had a VERY difficult time turning him down.

The point I'm trying to make is that tribute - regardless of what constitutes that tribute - like anything else, is just fine so long as it's consensual between both parties. If you don't like things like that, simply move on.

No one has ever said finding the kind of person you're interested in would be easy.

And yes, I do know a male dominant who has that kind of arrangement with the women who serve him. He obviously gets what he wants and if you talk to the women, they're thrilled with what they're getting out of the relationship. And yes, that's women - plural - more than one.

I admit I was tempted by the guy who wanted to clean my house AND buy me things after he was done. I was very tempted. Of course, I'd be tempted by ANYONE who wanted to clean my house for free with no expectation of BDSM or sex entering into the mix. Add shopping to the list of things to do, and well, there's a person who is taking care of one of my more lothesome jobs AND meeting one of my most enjoyable activities Who wouldn't be tempted?!

In the end though, I was uncomfortable with the idea of accepting gifts in payment for something that guy had fetishized. I said no. And wished him well in finding someone to help him realize his dream

Just because it wasn't my dream didn't mean he couldn't dream it. And it doesn't mean that he can't find his dream if that's his desire. Just because tribute isn't something you would choose to engage in, doesn't mean those who do - from both sides of the D/s fence - are wrong for enjoying what they enjoy.

juliet

Now... the guy who said he wanted to do home repairs in the nude...I'm thinking... a new deck..yea...that'd be perfect....Compromising value systems can be a good thing, right? I mean...it's a new DECK!!

< Message edited by julietsierra -- 1/14/2007 1:59:12 AM >

(in reply to MistressSassy66)

Post #: 74

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/14/2007 4:47:45 AM

cloudboy

Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline

Money can pretty much buy anything, can't it?

(in reply to Stephann)

Post #: 75

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/14/2007 5:54:26 AM

mgdartist

Posts: 328
Joined: 5/13/2006
From: irving tx
Status: offline

Well sonofa....
No wonder I can't get a sub. Was I not supposed to be charging them? I'm not pro really, it's just the standard $200 service charge for retraining. It's less than we charged for horses. And as far as all this nonsense about men wanting sex more, no it's not really like that, and women want it far more. Yeah, its a topsy-turvy world, and men hardly know how to act, but that doesn't change the fact.

So If I gotta do it free, why do the dommes still get to charge? Or do they? If so, that is whack.
If I start training free, I fear I'll be deluged with subs, and I can only handle so much, and how will I feed on their carcasses like the dommes do? This is gettin outta hand , really. Hell I even know a couple three Doms who have to support their own subbies! Now I ask you all, what kind of Service IS that? Seems to me it should be obvious if she wants to be a good slave, the least she could do is support her Dominant. I try to be nice about it, and say she makes less than 50k, Im willing to live simply, and just enjoy her for her submission. I just hope you all realize, if this trend of supporting submissives continues by Male Dominants, we may as well change the very meaning of D/s to "Dummy/sucubus"

<grin>
MGD

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(in reply to cloudboy)

Post #: 76

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/14/2007 6:20:56 AM

bandit25

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

I truly don't understand why (some) men get so enraged by pro dommes. If they don't like it, don't go there! Geez...that's so damn simple. As long as those guys aren't paying, what the hell do they care if someone charges or not. As I have stated before, it a dom wants to charge...even for "training" (whatever the hell that means), then let him go ahead and charge. If he finds someone willing to pay. more power to him!

(in reply to mgdartist)

Post #: 77

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/14/2007 10:25:11 AM

Tslaveboy

Posts: 211
Joined: 11/6/2006
Status: offline

One of the benefits of a capitalist system is choice.

If you have the money, you can have the best in healthcare, quality of life and the fulfillment of any needs you can imagine.

For those of us who don't have money, we usually don't get much choice so we need to use something other than money. I have used my personality to attract women who enjoy my company. I've dated strippers and pro-dommes. In the normal scenario, I'd be the one paying but because they enjoy my company, they have paid for taking me out to dinner and other entertainment. I've also been asked to perform in videos for some pro-dommes and have had some very good sessions for free.

So if you don't have the money, use your personality. An engaging personality is as good as gold.

(in reply to subslaveb0y)

Post #: 78

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/14/2007 11:01:15 AM

MzMia

Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: bandit25

I truly don't understand why (some) men get so enraged by pro dommes. If they don't like it, don't go there! Geez...that's so damn simple. As long as those guys aren't paying, what the hell do they care if someone charges or not. As I have stated before, it a dom wants to charge...even for "training" (whatever the hell that means), then let him go ahead and charge. If he finds someone willing to pay. more power to him!

Personally, I think many get enraged because many of the Pro's are so attractive.
Look around, many of the Pro's have pictures up {that may or may NOT be them}
that are of slender, beautiful women willing to engage you in all your fantasies!
LOL They don't want to pay the beauties!
Damn it, it should be free!
LOL These young, beautiful women should WANT me to submit to the things that
I WANT to submit to for free!
Hell I even made a do-me list for her to use!

< Message edited by MzMia -- 1/14/2007 11:34:17 AM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain

What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to bandit25)

Post #: 79

RE: big argument over female dominants - 1/14/2007 11:09:13 AM

Tslaveboy

Posts: 211
Joined: 11/6/2006
Status: offline

The beauty of many pro-dommes comes from the make-up. It takes RuPaul hours to look as beautiful as he does and it takes just as many hours for a pro-domme to look just as good.

I have friends who are pro-dommes and when I show up for a video session, I usually have to wait for a couple hours while they put on their make-up. My best friend does 3 layers of make-up to look as good as she does in her pictures and videos.

I've heard the arguments about pro-dommes versus lifestylers and the only difference is the make-up.

(in reply to MzMia)

Post #: 80

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