quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69
Emotion is not needed to dominate so there is nothing to be required except submission on the other half. Aloofness and coldness are perceptive adjatives and are nonbias.
Ross

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

quote:

ORIGINAL: marieToo

Ok but if your are deliberately detaching yourself so that you can be ruthless, this is all driven by things you are feeling.  No? 
The detachment itself, for instance---Are you not shutting down because you are feeling something that you think is innapropriate or non-productive?  Aren't you detaching in order to get yourself into a 'ruthless' frame of mind?

Ruthless is a perception. One need not be ruthless but can be firm in domination without emotion.

Ross

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMistsOne might argue.. that you don't really pay attention to what is being said... only trying to project your own beliefs as the one true way.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDominic
Some agree with the OP, others can't even imagine the concept of domination without emotion. That someone believes the latter is perfectly correct for them and their relationship; it doesn't change the fact that for the OP, emotion is not a requirement. That is his reality, which is just as correct as everyone else's.

quote:

ORIGINAL: adaddysgirl

i think the missing operative word is some.  Yes, some doms do not need emotion attached to dominate.  But as many doms have stated, emotion is definitely part of their domination.i think what Ross is saying is just like a lot of other things here.....his opinion....and not a fact....but he is trying desperately to convince others that it is a fact.  And true, it may be a fact for some....but for others, it is not even a possibility.

quote:

ORIGINAL: CelticPrince

SirD

One is putting their head in the sand to think that a D/s interaction is without emotion.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MaryT

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69
Emotion is not needed to dominate so there is nothing to be required except submission on the other half. Aloofness and coldness are perceptive adjatives and are nonbias.
Ross

Aloofness and coldness are not synonomous with having no emotion.  I don't believe a healthy human being who is not unconcious or drugged can be void of emotion.  That said, I believe emotion is necessary for wiitwd.  You can choose not to show emotion, but if you really don't feel anything ... 1)  Why the hell bother?  2)  You probably should get some help, IMO. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: DommeChains

My question in regard to this approach you tout is can domination without any emotional connection be done in a responsible manner?

I do not believe so.  Even the most fleeting of D/s interactions requires a certain level of trust and the dominant's responsibility to the submissive to abide by the terms of their negotiation.  In order to be trusted by a submissive the dominant needs to establish some degree of connection which encompasses an emotional context.  D/s inherently contains a sexual dynamic which is entwined with emotions of all types and degrees. 

Hence my contention that your stance of emotionless dominance is bullying or abuse hiding behind a mask of D/s.  Anyone can be cowed by an abuser.  A quality dominant is always responsible and aware of the need for informed, uncoerced consent from a submissive.  Consent based on a foundation of trust which requires some degree of emotional involvement.

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilbrattie

hi all,

This is an interesting topic. i think that there are some amounts of emotional involvement no matter what distance is attempted. Being trained creates a strong bond between the 2 people no matter what they do to prevent that, and in that bond are strong emotions (caring about someone is an emotion). A good friend of mine is close to her "Trainer" but not "with" Him, and they talk off and on all the time and even visit each other.

if i'm submitting myself to a person, fully, completely, in all ways, which imo is the only way to really explore all parts of yourself and grow... there will be some sort of connection emotionally.

On one site i read one Trainer stating that a period of "weaning" a submissive off of them is required in most cases, but in doing that they also keep in touch off and on and never leave the submissive that was just trained feeling alone or  abandoned. Others i've heard help the submissive in the search for a Dominant that would work well with them.

With all that said, it's hard to say there isn't any emotion... the act of dominating someone takes emotion... again imo that is...

just my 2 cents

~ brattie ~

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ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69
 
So would you say that belief is perception? So it can be percieved to be both healthy and unhealthy depending on your interpretation of what is needed in a relationship correct?

quote:

ORIGINAL: MaryT
Oh, absolutely, Ross.  Hitler and his victims had very different perceptions of what was healthy and unhealthy depending on their interpretations of their relationship.  That is correct.  Your response does not address my post, but you seem to spend a lot posting time floating about in the ether, so I'll leave you to it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MaryT

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69
Emotion is not needed to dominate so there is nothing to be required except submission on the other half. Aloofness and coldness are perceptive adjatives and are nonbias.
Ross

Aloofness and coldness are not synonomous with having no emotion. 

It can be argued in fact I believe it has been presented here that it is indeed emotionless. It is a matter of perception...not hard cold fact.



I don't believe a healthy human being who is not unconcious or drugged can be void of emotion. 

The statement was not being extended by Me if it were healthy or not but merely that domination can happen ...co exist without emotion.
 
Now if this statement were presented by a person in the mental health field it might have more credibility than a mere opinion.
 
I am not a weatherman but I think it will rain tomorrow. Am I correct?


That said, I believe emotion is necessary for wiitwd. 


Yes I appriciate the fact that you believe, it is your perception, your opinion, your value statement, and I concede it is your right to make your opinion known and I respect your right to do so.
 
 

You can choose not to show emotion, but if you really don't feel anything ...

So you are saying emotion is a freewill thing?
 
Something as an individual I choose to express or participate in?
 
Something that is not needed to dominate, healthy or not?


1)  Why the hell bother? 


Because it is something to accomplish, to prove a point, to be done, expose a generaliation that is accepted as a social norm.



2)  You probably should get some help, IMO. 

 
Yes I once again respect your opinion.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

So is it the concensus with readers that topping equals no emotion but domination equals emotion?

But i don't get what your point is here Ross.  Are you trying to get every single poster to say yes, i agree that there need not be emotion to dominate?  If so, i think you're in for a long haul here because i just don't see that happenin' 

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ORIGINAL: adaddysgirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

So is it the concensus with readers that topping equals no emotion but domination equals emotion?

 


But i don't get what your point is here Ross.  Are you trying to get every single poster to say yes, i agree that there need not be emotion to dominate?  If so, i think you're in for a long haul here because i just don't see that happenin' 
 

• I am highly attracted to the one I am dominating.
  
• I have a mental/emotional connection with the other person, be it close friend or lover.
  
• When they are attracted to me.
  
• They have a mental/emotional connect with me.

• I am not attracted to the other person

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiplashSmile

Here's my view on Domination and emotion.
Domination does not require emotional involvement, but it's an emotional experience.


Yes it really can...sometimes I have been pleasantly surprised at the outcome during a session.

I enjoy it best when

• I am highly attracted to the one I am dominating.

I  admit I do enjoy eye candy yet I have stopped a session with pinup material when she just was not there in mindset...sometimes I just pushed though it and changed objective and enjoyed the physical pleasures rather than any chance of intelligent bonding.

• I have a mental/emotional connection with the other person, be it close friend or lover.

Sometimes it can happen on the first encounter... sometimes after a few and obviously never.
 

• When they are attracted to me.

I have often wondered wether it was Me physically, mentally or emotionally they were really attracted to or just what I represented in a mindseys of their fantasy of being dominanted.
 
Granted the notion of being attractive does feed the cycle.
 

• They have a mental/emotional connect with me.

So how does one establish this in your opinion?
 
I totally hate it when

• I am not attracted to the other person

I must be physically attracted to the person I am dominating!
If I am mentally attracted to them, then this is a bonus!
If I am emotionally drawn into them, this is intense.

I have found that the intent, focus and mindset of plain janes can be more intense of pleasing Me than of pinups...therefor much more enjoyable in the mental realm for My personal expereince.
 
I have always perfered the girl next door as to Me it seemed much more obtainable fantasy than a pinup or model. Sometimes the behaviour of beautiful women is that of not trying as hard as their counterpart.


I have Dominated women which I found attractive and that alone.  There was no emotional involment.  But it was still an emotional experience non the less.  Sometimes, it's easier to dish out Domination on somebody you are not emotionally involved with.  Sometimes it's easier to dish this out if you are involved.  All depends upon your personality.

Sometimes the ability to adapt to certain situations is an excellent way to find out more about yourself...I know it has been for Me..

Some of my best growing experiences have been whan I was paired up with a Domme.  I have had 2 such relationships in my life which I cherish with all my soul.  With another Domme, there is this wicked exchange of evil ideas and thoughts.  Very open communication! In this case there was Emotional Involvement, without submission and a lot of S&M going on.

I too have learned quite a bit in this manner...some of My better sessions were influenced by conversations with a domme..they approach was enticing and then given My twist to it turned delcious.
 
Ross
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