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RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 11:19:37 AM   
bandit25


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Chill

(in reply to tml721)
Profile   Post #: 141
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 11:25:52 AM   
gooddogbenji


Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
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Wow.  Someone's gonna sleep well tonight!  All that screaming really saps toddlers!

I'll get the blankie ready.

Yours,


benji

PS:  Jesus, please protect me from the screamy guy!

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Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

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Profile   Post #: 142
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 11:28:03 AM   
bandit25


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OMG!  That signature line!  I am soooooooooooo offended.

(in reply to gooddogbenji)
Profile   Post #: 143
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 11:31:02 AM   
gooddogbenji


Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
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You have no sig line.  HOW DARE YOU????????

Do you believe in nothing?

Fucking nihilist.

Yours,


benji

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Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

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Profile   Post #: 144
I am sorry, I could not resist. - 2/4/2007 11:36:08 AM   
Lucius


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quote:

ORIGINAL: tml721

AND I'M WILLING TO LET IT DIE BUT PEOPLE LIKE YOU ARE BOUND AND DETERMINED TO KEEP BRINGING IT UP!!!! so WHO'S the problem NOW!!!??????
YOU WANT CAPS I'LL GIVE YOU CAPS AND A LOT MORE!!!!


Please do. In fact, it would be nice if you take the stuff you've posted here and put it in your profile or journal where everyone can see it, prefereably in context. That enables all to see exactly what you are and ensures you will be regarded with exactly that degree of respect you deserve.

To everyone else: Please forgive Me for posting this right after saying I wanted to get back on topic. I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist.

Lucius Alexander

The palindromedary suggests I should have tried harder.

(in reply to tml721)
Profile   Post #: 145
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 11:39:04 AM   
cyberdude611


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This is why many people dont post pictures on-line.

(in reply to sexypet)
Profile   Post #: 146
RE: I am sorry, I could not resist. - 2/4/2007 11:39:40 AM   
ModeratorEleven


Posts: 2007
Joined: 8/14/2005
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Ok folks, enough.  Back to grown up time please.

XI

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This mod goes to eleven.

(in reply to Lucius)
Profile   Post #: 147
RE: I am sorry, I could not resist. - 2/4/2007 11:45:05 AM   
gooddogbenji


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Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
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Yes, Lads.  'Tis nigh 4, time for tea.

I'll brew the tea, who's bringing the crumpets? 

But just to get everyone back on topic, what would you do if you were publically outed?  I, for one, would look confused, and questioningly (very important) say "noooo?  Ummmmm....  No."

Then go home and remove the pictures.

Yours,


benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to ModeratorEleven)
Profile   Post #: 148
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 11:51:16 AM   
sensualmagirl


Posts: 1065
Joined: 7/4/2006
From: Boston, MA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: elcorazonsuhogar

IYou have a profile and a picture on this site. You are out shopping in a city mall with your older teenage daughter who is standing right beside you.  You are approached in a store by man who asks if you have the screen name such and such.  You have used this name for many years in all manner of places on the net. Vanilla and lifestyle.  You acknowledge yes.  He immediately says he is such and such from Bondage and asks if you are still with the same Master.  I am curious how you would have reacted and what advice you would give this "man" should he read this thread?    



I don't have any children, but I do wonder if people recognize me. Sometimes, not often though since I'm pretty shy and don't look at strangers most of the time, I notice a funny "look" thrown my way from people on the street and I have to think "Do I have something on my face or do they recognize me from the internet" -- I usually rub my face to make sure nothing is there and keep walking, don't give much thought to it.  In some respects, I'm lucky I live in a major city, I can kind of just "blend" well, and I walk really fast, with my headphones on and iPod turned up

Anyhow, if somebody did come up to me in public that said that, even if I were alone, I would not be so thrilled having said person invading my personal "space" uninvited. I would probably be also be in such shock, I would look at them like they were crazy, tell them they have me confused with someone else, say excuse me, and walk away and ignore them. Which, by the way, politely "walking away/ignoring" does wonders for anybody giving you "heartburn" in most given situations... IMHO  

My advice to the person who came up to your friend? I'd tell him that it was really an invasion of her privacy, and should never have happened. Especially when you see she's with someone, but, even if she were alone, it was rather presumptious that she even wanted you to talk to her.  What if she was having a rotten day? What if... any number of countless other scenarios where you just don't want some stranger in your face? Also, what if it wasn't her? You've just "outed" yourself to a complete stranger too.  Why don't you just wait until you get home/to a computer and email her and say "hey, I thought I saw you today..." and continue on with your questions.  Maybe then she'll meet you for a coffee in the food court of that same mall when you all have time

_____________________________

"The most important thing in any relationship is not what you get but what you give" --Eleanor Roosevelt


MySpace

(in reply to elcorazonsuhogar)
Profile   Post #: 149
RE: I am sorry, I could not resist. - 2/4/2007 12:02:12 PM   
WyrdRich


Posts: 1733
Joined: 1/3/2005
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      I keep my pic up.  There is some risk in that I know.  I don't provide my city in the profile, but it could be narrowed down by studying my forum posts.  Certain events on the horizon might cause me to pull it down.

     Those who are close to us already know we are not entirely "normal," or at least know there are things they don't want to know.

      In a situation like the OP describes, such an approach would recieve a very cold response.

(in reply to ModeratorEleven)
Profile   Post #: 150
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 1:05:45 PM   
Lucius


Posts: 80
Joined: 6/13/2004
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Again trying to get sort of on topic-
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucius

In hopes of getting us back on topic:

It seems to Me anyone has a lot to lose by posting a photo, whether one is a submissive female who may be targetted for victimization by some nutcase, or a Dominant Male who, given the current state of the culture, would be universally condemned and labelled a monster. Perhaps Dominant Females have least to lose -in general- but in some cases I'm sure even for them being "outed" could be catastrophic.

Now I could ask why, therefore, so many people freely post pictures anyway; but if that's their choice, that's okay, I don't need to ask their reasoning. What concerns Me is the number of profiles I've seen that take a demanding tone towards requiring OTHERS to be similarly open with their faces - quite a few that state that if I don't have a photo in either My profile or a message don't bother contacting them, and even one or two that state or imply that there's something wrong with Me if I don't actually have it in My profile. 

So I ask; why is this? I already have My NAME out here in public - that's probably already more exposed than anyone has a right to demand I should be. If there have already been a few messages exchanged and things are to the point of "okay, let's talk about meeting" THEN I can understand wanting a photo if only to assure recognition at that first public rendezvous. But as a prerequisite to even talking to someone??

Lucius Alexander

Palindromedary Enterprises


If one of the people I reference above reads this, would you consider explaining your reasoning and addressing My obvious concerns?

Lucius Alexander

The One with a Palindromedary

(in reply to Lucius)
Profile   Post #: 151
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 2:57:42 PM   
julietsierra


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Joined: 9/26/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucius

The One with a Palindromedary


And now, I'm confused... you have a friend in a camel? Sometimes, things are just strange.

juliet

(in reply to Lucius)
Profile   Post #: 152
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 3:00:32 PM   
SCDommie


Posts: 176
Joined: 1/24/2007
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That is why I don't like the idea of Collarme having us put our own pictures on this site.  I won't do it. I had rather put my little cute tags on there. When you put your picture on a profile, it is free to the public.  This could open the door up for a stalker. 
Please Collarme, stop these pictures.  Let us post our tags instead of our actual photos. 

SCD

(in reply to sexypet)
Profile   Post #: 153
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 4:02:47 PM   
gooddogbenji


Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
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Why should CM take the freedom to choose from everyone?  You not putting one up is grand, and a choice.  Others putting one up is grand, and a choice.

Why make decisions for others?

Yours,


benji

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Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to SCDommie)
Profile   Post #: 154
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 4:38:18 PM   
sharainks


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Joined: 12/13/2004
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This is why a lot of us don't put our pics on these sites.  One would hope someone would have better sense than to pull the stunt he did but not everyone who frequents these places has good sense. 

(in reply to phychoticmess)
Profile   Post #: 155
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 4:40:21 PM   
cjenny


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I'm so glad I've no UM, no life to worry about hehe.

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~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to sharainks)
Profile   Post #: 156
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 4:41:29 PM   
Wulfchyld


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cj as cute as you are if I was in MI I would be your peeping Tom.

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Submission is not a gift... it is plunder!
Where there is a whip, there is a way!
Dom/mes of a feather, beat the f*ck out of slaves together


(in reply to cjenny)
Profile   Post #: 157
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 4:42:47 PM   
cjenny


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Aw thanks. I think..?
 

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.


~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to Wulfchyld)
Profile   Post #: 158
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 6:11:41 PM   
MstrssScarlet


Posts: 633
Joined: 6/3/2005
From: Indianapolis, Indiana
Status: offline
My husband and I have finally reached the point where all of our friends (outside of his work environment) are in the lifestyle.  We have no children living at home and only one parent living faaar away who wouldn't even THINK about looking at a site like this.  If one of my kids ran across my profile, the first thing I would ask would be "What were you doing in there?".  (My son was into porn sites before I was! lol)  Even some of the people my husband works with know something is up and some of them know everything.  He works with a lot of people with alternative lifestyles (swingers, gay, etc.) and it pretty much seems to be a "don't ask, don't tell" sort of atmosphere.  I'm located on the outskirts of a large city, so it would be hard to pinpoint me that way.  Guess I'm about as safe as they come. I do realize I'm still running a risk by posting so many pictures, but I personally am willing to take the chance.  Besides, as a pro domme it's essentially advertisement for me.  If it blows up in my face, it will be no one's fault but my own.
Mistress Scarlet

edited to add:  When my son ran up a bill in a porn site I was very calm and explained that it was normal to have those urges, just don't run up a bill satisfying them!  We have a very open relationship and I would hope that he wouldn't condemn me any quicker than I would him.

< Message edited by MstrssScarlet -- 2/4/2007 6:15:31 PM >


_____________________________

"Say, that hurts a little bit" "And you don't like to be hurt do ya?" "I don't know...kinda fun sometimes if it's done in the right spirit."
Jean Harlow in The Beast of the City

(in reply to cjenny)
Profile   Post #: 159
RE: Publically Outed Recognized from online profile - 2/4/2007 6:19:24 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: elcorazonsuhogar

I would like to pose a situation that occurred to a friend of mine this past week and ask for responses on how you would have handled it.

You have a profile and a picture on this site. You are out shopping in a city mall with your older teenage daughter who is standing right beside you.  You are approached in a store by man who asks if you have the screen name such and such.
  You have used this name for many years in all manner of places on the net. Vanilla and lifestyle.  You acknowledge yes.  He immediately says he is such and such from Bondage and asks if you are still with the same Master.  I am curious how you would have reacted and what advice you would give this "man" should he read this thread?    



Why would you even acknowledge the questions of a complete stranger???  Particular with who you had in tow.



_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to elcorazonsuhogar)
Profile   Post #: 160
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