Does "sub-drop" affect those with depression differently?

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Does "sub-drop" affect those with depression ... - 2/8/2007 8:54:09 PM

SusanofO

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I am starting to be somewhat concerned about this - because I've recently begun what I hope to be a wonderful relationship with a Dominant who lives in Texas. In March, I will be visiting him for a week for the first time, and I am sure we will end up doing some light to serious-level bdsm actvity at some point.

I take pretty heavy doses of anti-depressants, and have since I was 18 years old. I have genetic, uni-polar depression that gets pretty serious (as in suicide-attempt serious) if I go off my meds (which I never do, btw).

I have been reading some threads about "sub-drop" and even though I've had a Dominant before, and our engaging in bdsm activity never seemed to result in serious, terribly depressing "sub-drop" for me, my ex-Dominant wasn't nearly as experienced as the Dominant I will be visiting - and it is my impression we will probably end up engaging in what some might consider "heavier" bdsm activity while I am visiting him in Texas in March. My first Dominant and I really never engaged in much beyond heavy spanking, and using straps and belts.

My question is: Is there anyone out there who takes anti-depressants on a regular basis? If so, have you found your experiences with "sub-drop" to be more serious, or lasting, and if so - what did you do about it?

Should I be worried about this? Should I be doing anything about it? I am not sure what to do.

The Dominant I will be visiting knows I take anti-depressants, and I've told him I am religious about taking my meds.

Any helpful comments are appreciated. Thanks.

Sincerely,

Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 2/8/2007 9:02:07 PM >

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 8:57:15 PM

mixielicous

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i have in the past, regularly been on meds. i have not suffered lasting sub drop - i dont believe it exists, but thats another thread.

i would think if youre on your meds theres no problem esp if you havent had it in the past.

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 8:59:05 PM

SusanofO

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Thanks for the reply, mixielicious. It is re-assuring to me.

*It isn't my impression that this new Dominant will neglect me ass far as "Aftercare" is concerned. I have already let him know I really appreciate being held after a "scene" and he has let me know that is his way already, anyway.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 2/8/2007 9:04:44 PM >

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:06:22 PM

bludemonn

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous

i have in the past, regularly been on meds. i have not suffered lasting sub drop - i dont believe it exists, but thats another thread.

i would think if youre on your meds theres no problem esp if you havent had it in the past.

Can I just say you hit the nail on the head right there, upon reading the original question I looked on the inter-web about sub-drop depression, funnily enough the top listing was from a bdsm site! I do feel it's all about what the individual actually believes, some depressives live off being called depressed and some refute it, I think it's great advice Mixie has given (by the way I'm not a depressive..I may look it but I arent!) Peace!

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:10:09 PM

WingedSnake

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I belong to the camp of not in submissive drop believers. To me it seems to be a term formed to cover different problems, attitudes and dispositions.

But that is another topic.

Susan, from following your texts here, and knowing that you are experienced in dealing with your depression, i doubt that "sub drop" will be an topic. But if it happens, go for a walk with the new dominant and do something completely unrelated to SM for some time, till you regain your selfsense.

Ruth

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:11:52 PM

SusanofO

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Well, I must admit that if I was bi-polar, I'd be more worried - it is my impression in general that bi-polar depression can be harder to control, but that's just my personal opinion. I was wondering though - if anyone thinks the "level" of bdsm activity has anything to do with feeling what some term as "sub-drop".

I do believe that how one reacts to having depression determines their over-all quality of life. I had to make a decision in my early twenties about whether I was going to let it affect my life to a detrimental degree - because it was clear by then it was something I was always going to be dealing with. It was a real struggle, though, for about 6-7 years for me. Thank God I found a medicatrion that worked for me.

Still, there have been one or more times in my life since then, when its come up and "bit me", so to speak, when I wasn't really prepared for it - usually when something overwhelming to me was happening in my life. In which case, I just slowed down in general, and increased the meds, and it worked. So maybe that would work if I had a bad reaction to any "scene" with this new Dominant.

I am basically just wondering what others' experiences have been, if they know they suffer from depression, and are taking meds for it, as far as it affecting their "level" of bdsm activity.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 2/8/2007 9:15:06 PM >

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:18:18 PM

SweetSarijane

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I am on an anti-depressent and have been for quite a few years. I only rarely get sub drop and when I do it's mild and is related to the aftercare in that if the play was particularly intense and extended and I didn't get any or very little aftercare, then within a couple of days I'd feel down and "droppy". It has only lasted up to 3 days of just feeling kinda down and then I'm fine again. I know what I need in basic aftercare, which isn't all that much, and which certain aspects I need to make sure are done to avoid drop.

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:20:28 PM

michaelOfGeorgia

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My question is: Is there anyone out there who takes anti-depressants on a regular basis? If so, have you found your experiences with "sub-drop" to be more serious, or lasting, and if so - what did you do about it?

i have been on so many anti-depressants that i've developed an immunity to them...and, yes...my depression seems hightened by 'sub-drop'

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:23:50 PM

SusanofO

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WingedSnake - Good suggestion. I will do that. Maybe I should mention this person is also a medical doctor, so I think he will be familiar with what could maybe go wrong (although maybe not - I am not sure). However, his last submissive had some very serious medical issues, and he handed those really, really well - and for years on end, too (almost a decade).

I can count on one hand the number of people that would have bothered to take on a submissive with the kind of medical issues this woman had. So from the standpoint of his being "reliable", I am not worried. He's a really caring guy.

I just don't want to be a gigantic pain in the keester for him. Hopefully, that won't happen. He's made it pretty clear he doesn't want a sub with extensive "issues" (he's already had some. And it sounds like he took really good care of them). But - that's not what he is looking for at this point.

I don't think my depression will be a real problem (if I did, I would not have pursued a realtionship with him at all) - but - all of these threads lately on "sub-drop" just started to raise some real questions in my mind.

Thanks for any responses, folks.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 2/8/2007 9:45:01 PM >

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"Hope is the thing with feathers,
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And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:26:06 PM

SweetSarijane

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

I am basically just wondering what others' experiences have been, if they know they suffer from depression, and are taking meds for it, as far as it affecting their "level" of bdsm activity.

- Susan

The fact that I have depression and take meds for it does not affect my level of bdsm play. I play hard and totally get into it and let go. Before I ever got interested in and into bdsm, I had learned how to best manage my depression to enable me to fully live and enjoy life. I have depression, I take meds for it, I don't let it control me anymore. I live my life. I've been living it to the fullest I possibly can for a very long time.

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:26:44 PM

SirKenin

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From my experience, no... But I think that aftercare is critical and subs with unstable moods are more vulnerable to poor aftercare treatment. I have spent up to 24 hours on aftercare to ensure that no harm came to the sub, so if you are vulnerable I would definitely express that to the Dom BEFORE play and make sure that he is going to fall into line with that.

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:27:13 PM

SusanofO

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michaelofGeorgia: That is the kind of thing that worries me, I guess. This person is so experienced, and from what he says, can be a pretty heavy player, but I also know he isn't going to do anything I am not ready to do (he's made that clear).

But I guess I am wondering if a person could reach the point their meds don't work, because they are consistently engaging in heavier bdsm actvitiy. I guess in that case, I could go to a doctor and try to find another medication that worked better. Maybe I am jumping the gun, worrying about this at all. I dunno.

SirKenin: That is good to know. Good points. Thanks.

SweetSarjane: Good to hear an opinion from someone who isn;t letting it get in the way (although I am not sure that is always a matter of choice, in many cases it may well be). In any case, your post was encouraging - thank you.

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 2/8/2007 9:53:53 PM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:28:25 PM

yoursnatch

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Well i have just recently started taking meds for depression and it has not affected my moods after a session. I am always depressed afterwards because i don't like them to end lol.

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:31:24 PM

SusanofO

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yoursnatch: Well yeah - I don't like it when they end, either, he.

- Susan

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And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:33:53 PM

SweetSarijane

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

But I guess I am wondering if a person could reach the point their meds don't work, because they are consistently engaging in heavier bdsm actvitiy. I guess in that case, I could go to a doctor and try to find another medication that worked better. Maybe I am jumping the gun, worrying about this at all. I dunno.

For me, I don't fully rely on my meds to take care of my depression, so even if the med wasn't working as well for whatever reason, I still have things I have always used to help me deal with bad times. I'm no doctor, but it seems to me if you have found what works to help deal with it and continue utilizing it then bdsm play or not, you will continue dealing with it. I don't see where consistant bdsm play in and of itself would affect how your meds work. It's definitely ok to worry, I know i worry about things, just don't let the worry control you.

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:38:19 PM

SweetSarijane

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

SweetSarjane: Good to hear an opinion from someone who isn;t letting it get in the way (although I am not sure that is always a matter of choice, in many cases it may well be). In any case, your post was encouraging - thank you.

I agree, it isn't always a matter of choice. I do have times when things hit me and hit hard and I have to fight my way out of it. It's not all sunshine and roses, but I just finally got to the point where I was tired of letting the depression win. Now it still wins at times, but not for very long lol. I'm glad my post gave you a little encouragement <smile>.

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:39:56 PM

obey1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

I was wondering though - if anyone thinks the "level" of bdsm activity has anything to do with feeling what some term as "sub-drop".

Short answer: YES. I am a semi-quasi-expert in hormones. Dealt with them most of my life. I still have the rest of the posts to read, but wanted to say YES.

< Message edited by obey1 -- 2/8/2007 9:49:23 PM >

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:41:55 PM

SusanofO

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SweetSarijane: Your posts were helpful. Thanks much. Yes, I have developed little "coping tools" over the years. I can tell when I am in need of a "mental health" day - and on those days (they are infrequent, but do occur) - I just take off, and go out to lunch, and shopping, or to a museum (usually alone), or whatever I want to do. I don't do anything particulary strenuous. I also learned to do meditation years ago, and still occasionally practice that. I also like long bubble baths. Whatever works.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 2/8/2007 9:42:41 PM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:45:05 PM

obey1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

Maybe I should mention this person is also a medical doctor.... He's made it pretty clear he doesn't want a sub with extensive "issues" ... that's not what he is looking for at this point.

Ok, read some more and you are still the top OP, LOL.

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RE: Does "sub-drop" affect those with depress... - 2/8/2007 9:46:15 PM

SusanofO

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obey1: I will be interested to read your full opinion. Thanks.

Hehhe. Just read your "extended" opinion. Thanks. Actually - I am very interested in your "professional" opinion.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 2/8/2007 9:47:56 PM >

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"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

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