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CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/12/2007 9:25:48 PM   
Wiplash


Posts: 11
Joined: 2/8/2007
Status: offline 		After chatting with a number of subbies/slaves, it appears that may prefer a Dom who will humiliate them with derogatory names, remakes or words. I have too much respect for womanhood to do so in such a vulgar manor and goes against my personal code of conduct. Therefore the question is posed once again ...Can a Dom be a Gentlemen?
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/12/2007 9:33:13 PM   
stef


Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline 		Umm, yes. 

~stef

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(in reply to Wiplash)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/12/2007 9:37:31 PM   
JasonF


Posts: 61
Joined: 5/30/2005
Status: offline 		There's nothing more fun than looking your girl in the eye, telling her she's you're really good girl, then spanking/biting/hitting her. Gentlemanliness can add to the mindfuck.


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Jay
TNG-NC Council Member
engaged to my girl, junecleaver

(in reply to stef)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/12/2007 9:41:04 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		http://www.collarchat.com/m_799563/mpage_1/key_gentleman/tm.htm#799760
what makes a 'real' dom?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_775753/mpage_1/key_gentleman/tm.htm#775760
dominants who show emotions, weakness or vulnerability

http://www.collarchat.com/m_771270/mpage_1/key_gentleman/tm.htm#771630
Does gentle master mean weak?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_668725/mpage_1/key_gentleman/tm.htm#668733
Too polite?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_505491/mpage_1/key_gentleman/tm.htm#505668
Seeking consensus: dominant as gentleman?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_433779/mpage_1/key_gentleman/tm.htm#433966
Master...in slaves' eyes!

http://www.collarchat.com/m_380311/mpage_2/key_gentleman%252Cdom/tm.htm#384513
dom vs gentleman

http://www.collarchat.com/m_266268/mpage_1/key_gentleman%252Cdom/tm.htm#266288
the gentleman dom with feelings

Is the term gentleman dom an oxymoron?

Gentlemen vs nice guy

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Wiplash)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/12/2007 9:50:30 PM   
Sorenson


Posts: 4
Joined: 10/6/2005
Status: offline 		First, there is no excuse for a Dom not to have manners. I have been in the lifestyle for well over 25 years and have always been a gentleman in my treatment of my sub/slave. I have always enjoyed treating her as a lady. However, when scening or alone, things can change and One becomes demanding. Besides, when treating her as a lady, if she doesn't act as she should it becomes another excuse for discipline

(in reply to Wiplash)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/12/2007 9:52:25 PM   
novicecourtesan


Posts: 116
Joined: 2/11/2007
Status: offline 		all I can say is....god I hope so!

I was having a hard time convincing my friend that gentlemen can be doms. Then I showed her this site. I see a lot of evidence here that there are men who find a ladylike demeanor to be very sexy as well...thank goodness for that too!

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/12/2007 10:01:18 PM   
touchthesky


Posts: 121
Joined: 1/27/2007
Status: offline 		The only 2 men i can think of who i reguard as gentleman of the old school are Doms. Of course they can call you other names in bed or for... stuff...what i notice is some of the geekier Doms have poor social skills, i would say the more they spend time on online video games as opposed to say fine dining and poetry slams the less opening the car door and steamy meaningful glances one sees

(in reply to novicecourtesan)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/12/2007 10:02:13 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		I would guess most gentlemen like doms score better than the alternative with submissives.

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Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Wiplash)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/12/2007 11:04:15 PM   
amiciaN


Posts: 228
Joined: 1/20/2007
Status: offline 		Mine is.  

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NChaka's amicia

I have never been lifted so high as when I kneel at His feet.

(in reply to juliaoceania)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/12/2007 11:25:00 PM   
obis


Posts: 412
Joined: 9/9/2005
From: Austin, TX, USA
Status: offline 		I sure hope so. I don't see that being a gentleman and fulfilling needs in the bedroom have to be mutually exclusive. If she didn't enjoy it, i wouldn't call her those things, and I think consideration is probably the most gentlemanly quality there is :)

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/13/2007 2:52:30 AM   
CrazyC


Posts: 949
Joined: 9/28/2006
Status: offline 		Yep...:).

I was babied one night and trust me it was very disarming for me to go through that then just getting a good spanking.

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(in reply to obis)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/13/2007 3:54:07 AM   
slavegirl1969


Posts: 69
Joined: 9/26/2006
Status: offline 		Yes.  My Master was brought up the old fashioned way that you don't swear in front of women. He does enjoy/we do have humiliation in our relationship but I can't think of a time when he has called me a vulgar name. He also knows that names don't humiliate me that much (I get called quite a lot of them during a night's work so I'm sort of immune to them lol) and prefers physical humiliation, which certainly hit the mark better for me.

(in reply to Wiplash)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/13/2007 3:57:30 AM   
sleazybutterfly


Posts: 2801
Joined: 5/15/2006
Status: offline 		My Master is very much one.  He is kind, caring, opens doors for me, and is always considerate of my feelings.  He does call me his slut in bed, but I am his slut so it doesn't hold anything negative for me at all.  If someone on the street does it, they won't walk straight again for a while.

Sometimes there can be nothing more gentlemenly (sp) than having a nice deep voice in my ear saying "turn over and get on your knees so I can fuck you, slut"...knowing that same voice will tell you how much they love you several times a day.

To me its not crude, its foreplay.

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~Flutterby
~Curvylicious
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, she became a butterfly.
Life is not a popularity contest, it's better to be hated for what you believe, than loved for a lie.

(in reply to Wiplash)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/13/2007 4:49:06 AM   
losttreasure


Posts: 875
Joined: 12/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sleazybutterfly

Sometimes there can be nothing more gentlemenly (sp) than having a nice deep voice in my ear saying "turn over and get on your knees so I can fuck you, slut"...knowing that same voice will tell you how much they love you several times a day.


Oh my, yes!  Throw a please in there, and a thank you after, and I absolutely melt. 

I've said it before, there's just something hot about a dominant who's polite. 


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Just because it isn't "all about me", doesn't make it "all about you".

(in reply to sleazybutterfly)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/13/2007 5:39:28 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		I can tell a fish fork from a shellfish fork, I can discuss art and literature, and I hold the door open for women but I like my women to be whatever I desire at the moment whether that be a lady or a cum sucking whore.

(in reply to losttreasure)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/13/2007 5:46:24 AM   
jadia


Posts: 13
Joined: 8/4/2004
Status: offline 		Hmmm...not only "can" a Dom be a gentleman, but for me it is a requirement in public.   Behind closed doors he will be what his nature requires at the time.  I don't object to being treated with respect and care at all.   It is not a weakness, it is a prized attribute!

jadia

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/13/2007 6:01:25 AM   
mixielicous


Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline 		fast reply,
i would think that in the long run, any Dom true to Himself will find He acts like a gentleman.

i know Mine does :)

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"lets just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy"


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RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/13/2007 6:10:34 AM   
Diamonion


Posts: 5
Joined: 12/16/2006
Status: offline 		"it appears that may prefer a Dom who will humiliate them with derogatory names, remakes or words"

This is true.  I'm not so much into humiliation play myself, other than the occasional interesting name, though such names are often still special to me and my pet.  Many people are into the humiliation, and if that does it for them, than good to it.  On the other hand, there is no reason to not act the gentleman on a normal basis.  Even in a 24/7 exchange relationship, when out in public, or just when being together, there is no reason that one cannot be polite, and easy going for the time.

(in reply to mixielicous)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/13/2007 6:12:08 AM   
MaryT


Posts: 553
Joined: 12/8/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Wiplash

After chatting with a number of subbies/slaves, it appears that may prefer a Dom who will humiliate them with derogatory names, remakes or words. I have too much respect for womanhood to do so in such a vulgar manor and goes against my personal code of conduct. Therefore the question is posed once again ...Can a Dom be a Gentlemen?


I don't think you really wanted answers, since you seemingly answered your own question in the previous sentence.  Your post looks like a profile booster to me, but I'll play.

Words are tricky.  What do you define as a gentleman?  What do you define as "derogatory"?  I am betting that certain labels you would define as "derogatory" are hot buttons for me.  I do not consider a dom who uses them well to be less a gentleman for it. 

I don't particularly care for the use of "womanhood" in your post, although "women" wouldn't have bothered me at all.  Why?  I dunno ... I could easily say, "I respect men," but I would not say, "I respect manhood."

MaryT

(in reply to Wiplash)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: CAn a Dom be a Gentlemen? - 2/13/2007 6:33:15 AM   
innatedesire


Posts: 111
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Wiplash

After chatting with a number of subbies/slaves, it appears that may prefer a Dom who will humiliate them with derogatory names, remakes or words. I have too much respect for womanhood to do so in such a vulgar manor and goes against my personal code of conduct. Therefore the question is posed once again ...Can a Dom be a Gentlemen?


Of course they can  why  not? Not all subs/slaves like humiliation; if that is not your kink  then that is not your  kink, keep looking nothing wrong with that, sooner or later you will find one that shares your  views.



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Never under estimate the stupidity of your fellow man

(in reply to Wiplash)
Profile   Post #: 20
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