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RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/20/2007 5:08:29 PM

BalletBob

Posts: 1645
Joined: 7/14/2005
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OUCH ! What a LOW BLOW ! Just like most of the other CD Bashers here. You just don't understand. It makes them feel GOOD ! It makes them feel Femanine. So what, if they don't look good Dressed up. As long as they are having FUN, and not hurting anyone, what harm is it doing? N O N E ! ! !

I don't look great either when I dress up, but then again, I don't look above the neck in a mirror. Women's clothes are so much more comfy than a Man's clothes. READ ALL THE OTHER POSTS about this.

Why aren't females, wearing Jeans ans T shirts, called "RIDICULOUS"? How oftern do you see Females, dressed as Females? Not much. All in Jeans, Heavy, Ugly Sneakers, and HATS ! Where are the Dresses, Skirts, Tights, Socks, Cute Shoes and Barrets or hats like they use too?

Burning his Heavy, Ugly Sneakers and Boxer Shorts, Sub BalletBob

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Post #: 21

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/20/2007 5:25:10 PM

switchNYCgirl

Posts: 2
Joined: 12/30/2006
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To sketch where I am coming from, I am a woman who fully gender transitioned from the male body in which I was born. I am completely female now, society accepts me for who I am without friction or any questions, and people, including men I am intimate with, typically have almost no idea about my past unless I share it.

This discussion just tears my heart out. With respect to terminology, I believe it is best to differentiate, and only where necessary, with "woman without a transsexual history" vs. "woman with a transsexual history." The distinction may sound purely semantic, but I assure that I too am a "natural born" woman who came from her mother like anyone else. And I feel certain that anyone with a heart, after spending a little time with me, would feel the same. It hurts very, very much to be separated from human experiences and opportunities for intimacy simply because of a birth condition that no one would ever choose. Though fortunately our unfortunate birth conditions may be fixed.

This hurt is compounded by sentiments like "I would prefer a natural born woman." To know how someone in my position feels, you may imagine that you were a woman born with a birth defect in the appearance of your vulva. Now imagine that you had it surgically corrected so that you can finally be intimate. Now imagine that people consider you "unnatural" and prefer "natural" ones over you. You have the right body now, but because of the past, that's still just not good enough. How devastating.

I do *not* intend to criticize anyone. I only wish to share my feelings. Thank you for the opportunity to do so.

< Message edited by switchNYCgirl -- 2/20/2007 5:27:24 PM >

(in reply to BalletBob)

Post #: 22

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/20/2007 7:19:25 PM

petdave

Posts: 2479
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyEllen
OK then - we've had a few threads now on "sissies", where yet again most of the ladies have expressed that its not something they are interested in, where the sissies have tried to defend their corner against the charge of, to shorten it as much as possible, it being all about them indulging their fetish rather than submission in the usually understood way.

I wondered though, if this is the case? So in an effort to identify an answer, I wanted to ask the sissies this;

Which of the following dominant partners would be good, assuming the other person indulged your sissiness, not necessarily in a long term relationship?

1) A natural born woman
2) A natural born man, as a man
3) A transsexual woman
4) A transsexual man
5) Another crossdresser

Since the thread has gotten a bit bastardized anyway, i've been curious... what connection were you trying to make? Seems like you're asking about sexual orientation, which is pretty well independent of fetishism AND submission... you can be bisexual and submit to men or women, or you can be a fetishist who is so focused on your needs that your partner's gender isn't really relevant... and i'm not quite sure where biological vs. trans comes in either.

(in reply to LadyEllen)

Post #: 23

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/20/2007 7:32:06 PM

DiurnalVampire

Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
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Personally, the boys I have known that have identified as sissies have always prefered natural born Dommes. The problem *I* have with most sissies is that their interest in Forced Femme doesnt make sense. How can you be forced to do something that you enjoy so much? I have no problem femenizing my boys. I enjoy it greatly. I do not, however, like forced femme.

Id be interested in the gender dysphoria paper as well.

And BalletBob, it is not a low blow. There are many people who dress who go out of their way to make a mockery of their dressing. Have you ever been to a drag show? Have you ever seen those dressed that are so obviously inappropriately attired that its nearly painful to see? Those sissies and femmes who dress to make themselves look good are very enjoyable. Those who dress inappropriately are about as enjoyable to be around as natural females who go out of their way to dress inapproprately. Its just unpleasant.

My 2 cents.
DV

_____________________________

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VampiresLair

(in reply to BalletBob)

Post #: 24

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/20/2007 8:15:13 PM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BalletBob

OUCH ! What a LOW BLOW ! Just like most of the other CD Bashers here. You just don't understand. It makes them feel GOOD ! It makes them feel Femanine. So what, if they don't look good Dressed up. As long as they are having FUN, and not hurting anyone, what harm is it doing? N O N E ! ! !

I don't look great either when I dress up, but then again, I don't look above the neck in a mirror. Women's clothes are so much more comfy than a Man's clothes. READ ALL THE OTHER POSTS about this.

Why aren't females, wearing Jeans ans T shirts, called "RIDICULOUS"? How oftern do you see Females, dressed as Females? Not much. All in Jeans, Heavy, Ugly Sneakers, and HATS ! Where are the Dresses, Skirts, Tights, Socks, Cute Shoes and Barrets or hats like they use too?

Burning his Heavy, Ugly Sneakers and Boxer Shorts, Sub BalletBob

Bob.. now you know I told you you have "grown on me"..so my question to you is posted with respect and curiosity.

When I hear the statement like "it makes me feel feminine" I wonder... how does a man know what "feminine" feels like?

When a man first starts "dressing as a woman"..why is it they go for the slutty looks first (or so it seems)?

Also, I think someone could make a mint making under garments for men using women's silky fabrics and such what do you think?

_____________________________

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I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to BalletBob)

Post #: 25

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/21/2007 1:23:17 AM

subnstudent

Posts: 105
Joined: 9/18/2006
Status: offline

The market is there...

and as for people who don't look all that great in their idea of being 'dressed'... I think BalletBob's got a point. They're just having fun with it.
I know I've picked out a couple of things that I don't look that great in. That doesn't stop me from liking to wear them, ya?

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 26

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/21/2007 7:36:17 AM

MistressDiane

Posts: 334
Joined: 2/5/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DiurnalVampire

Personally, the boys I have known that have identified as sissies have always prefered natural born Dommes. The problem *I* have with most sissies is that their interest in Forced Femme doesnt make sense. How can you be forced to do something that you enjoy so much? I have no problem femenizing my boys. I enjoy it greatly. I do not, however, like forced femme.

Id be interested in the gender dysphoria paper as well.

And BalletBob, it is not a low blow. There are many people who dress who go out of their way to make a mockery of their dressing. Have you ever been to a drag show? Have you ever seen those dressed that are so obviously inappropriately attired that its nearly painful to see? Those sissies and femmes who dress to make themselves look good are very enjoyable. Those who dress inappropriately are about as enjoyable to be around as natural females who go out of their way to dress inapproprately. Its just unpleasant.

My 2 cents.
DV

Glad you get what I'm saying DV. It wasn't meant to be a blow nor a bash. It's a legitimate question. Some do seem to make a mockery of it. That makes me question their motivation and intent. Is it an attempt at self humilitaion or an attempt at humiliating women? I have nothing but respect for transgendered and crossdressers who put themselves together well and sincerely are honoring the female. There is a difference and it doesn't have anything to do with looking good either. You don't have to be a raving beauty for your intent and pride to show through. Frankly, some are downright scarey and they obviously put themselves together that way. This raises questions in a womans mind as to intent and it puts some off.

_____________________________

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(in reply to DiurnalVampire)

Post #: 27

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/21/2007 7:55:21 AM

areyouworthy4

Posts: 5
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: MA
Status: offline

I am interested in this as well. My new slave loves dressing femme and I haven't allowed him yet. He has never had the pleasure but has dreamed about being pretty. I too feel that "giving in" to a sub's ultimate fantasy is a reward, not a forced issue. The more he begs for it the more I don't want to give it to him. Having said that, it's much more exciting that he wants it then putting panties on a slave and having him cringe and be uncomfortable - that's not as much fun for me. So while I do look forward to dressing and making him up, until then he'll have to stop whining about it.

On a side note, since this post has gone in all directions - do you buy outfits for your sissies or have them go buy them? There again is the power issue, where I am putting out money for his pleasure...

On a sideside note I had to chuckle at the comment that womens clothes are so much more comfortable and that females who wear jeans/hat are less feminine - wow, would have never thought that was a possibility! Binding pantyhose, bras, tight fitting suck in your gut wear... give me sweats and a hat any day :)

(in reply to MistressDiane)

Post #: 28

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/21/2007 9:26:35 AM

SweetDommes

Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline

I have to put in something - I see a difference between a crossdresser and someone who identifies as a sissy. CDs tend to not be nearly as demanding and don't act like attention whores like most self-identified sissies. I am not interested in CDs, but have no issues with them. I do get incredibly irritated by the behavior and attitude of most sissies that I've run across. It ranks right up there with the behavior of online gorean slave girls in the chat rooms *rolls eyes* Most CDs also tend to wear more "normal" dresses (whereas sissies go for the most frills and lace that they can - they overdo it, IMO).

Another thing, for those who say that women's clothing is more comfortable ... I just want to say, that not everyone finds dresses and skirts to be more comfortable. Personally, I am most uncomfortable (and I'm talking both physical and mental discomfort) when I am in a dress. I get cold if there is the slightest breeze, going to the bathroom while wearing hose is a freakin nightmare, etc. I'm glad that y'all are comfortable in them, but please do not make the mistake of thinking that they are more comfortable for everyone. There is a reason (and a damn good one, thank you very much) that I will take a pair of slacks over a dress any day of the week when I have to dress up. I own about 5 dresses and I may wear one of them every 6 months (or less often). I know that I look good in them, but if they aren't comfortable for me, then it will show and I will not show my discomfort in such a way.

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Post #: 29

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/21/2007 9:33:12 AM

BOUNTYHUNTER

Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline

YOU know my views on this subject darling.They for the most part all divas and it is all about them...IF God had wanted a male to become a sissy he would have had the stork delivered him in hot pink panties..smile.. Those ugly ones are making fun of women don't you think....BH

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(in reply to MistressDiane)

Post #: 30

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/21/2007 10:26:49 AM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

Ellen :)

We have a prgram comming up on this tomorrow (sort of) http://drkeith.warnerbros.com/

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to LadyEllen)

Post #: 31

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/21/2007 6:46:02 PM

Jasmyn

Posts: 1234
Joined: 2/6/2004
From: New Zealand
Status: offline

quote:

Those ugly ones are making fun of women don't you think

Pfft ... a woman can only be made fun of if she thinks she can ... any woman who thinks a badly dressed or turned out CD or Sissy is making a mockery of 'women' then she needs to do some work on how she views herself and her womanhood. I find that thinking incredibly rank and anyone who harbours it hasn't a frigging clue to sissification, cross dressing or feminisation.

_____________________________

quote:

"To learn the art of submission a slave must first give up the desires that drew him to submission in the first place." Mistress Jasmyn Jan 2005.

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(in reply to BOUNTYHUNTER)

Post #: 32

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/21/2007 9:38:46 PM

cloudboy

Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jasmyn

Pfft ... a woman can only be made fun of if she thinks she can ... any woman who thinks a badly dressed or turned out CD or Sissy is making a mockery of 'women' then she needs to do some work on how she views herself and her womanhood. I find that thinking incredibly rank and anyone who harbours it hasn't a frigging clue to sissification, cross dressing or feminisation.[/font]

Its also stupid to think the clothes make the gender. When women are in pants, its not a commentary on men. If there is a commentary clothes make, its made about the wearer.

The now departed LOLA once said, "A man in a dress is not a woman. He is a man in a dress assuming a different role or persona."

(I paraphrase and also fail to use Lola's old pink font.)

< Message edited by cloudboy -- 2/21/2007 9:40:55 PM >

(in reply to Jasmyn)

Post #: 33

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/21/2007 10:03:09 PM

CalliopePurple

Posts: 2539
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From: SeaTac area
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I miss LOLA and all of his wonderfully eloquent thoughts on sissies.

_____________________________

Kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute
hajimete kimi ni atta hoshizora no shita de.
Kimi ni tsutaetai todokanai omoi demo
boku no kokoro wa mada kimi o sagashiteiru.

Gackt - Kimi ni Aitakute

(in reply to cloudboy)

Post #: 34

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/21/2007 10:33:29 PM

BalletBob

Posts: 1645
Joined: 7/14/2005
Status: offline

OK Lotussong. You got me thinking, even though it hurts.

I guess I realy don't know what a women feels like. To me, she would feel free, being able to war whatever she wants, without someone telling her she is nuts, for dressing a certain way.

And I don't know about others, but I didn't first do Slutty. I did a Ballerina, and that is quite far from Slutty, and then I did Britney. Well, I guess she is kind of slutty, but I think the White Tights and Mary Janes made a CUTE Little Girl look.

You are right too, about selling Panties and things for men. Women wear Boxers now, so why not do something for the males? I might be pretty SMALL (OUCH !), but I would like some more material in the front of my Thongs.

Take care and I hope I redeemed myself.

Sincerly Blushing En Pointe, Sub BalletBob

PS Now I will get of my Soap Box, before I trip and fall, in my Pointe Shoes.

_____________________________

"I get my kicks above the Waistline, Sunshine"

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 35

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/22/2007 2:31:35 PM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

Ellen :)

We have a program coming up on this tomorrow (sort of) http://drkeith.warnerbros.com/

This was a good program. After watching it, I reflected on why men seem to go the distance to become their female identity and the F->M transformation wasn't as prevalent.

OK Ellen, tell me if I figured it all out yet :).. I surmise that the M--> F complete transformation is the majority because it is indeed a WOMAN's nature to correct any physical anomaly. Woman are notoriously vain, so this thought verified the reality of it all for me. I never doubted the physiology of gender dismorphia. My question was why didn't more F-->M take place. Men aren't as finicky :) Plus the operation is more detailed.

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 36

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/22/2007 3:13:48 PM

CalliopePurple

Posts: 2539
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: SeaTac area
Status: offline

Lotus, there simply aren't as many FtMs that are willing to be public with anything. That's been my experience, especially here on CM where I'm friends with at least a handful of MtFs, but haven't talked to any fellow FtMs so far. And that holds true for the rest of my Internet communities as well.

From a surgical standpoint, it's a lot easier to take away than to create. It's also much more expensive. If I were to want a penis that has the length of a genetic guy's, my choices are to take skin from either my forearm or stomach and have it grafted in. And the big drawback is loss of sensation that way. So I will eventually probably be content with just having a few inches. And if a partner complains - that's what strapons are for!

Ken, CM's resident forum FtM

_____________________________

Kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute
hajimete kimi ni atta hoshizora no shita de.
Kimi ni tsutaetai todokanai omoi demo
boku no kokoro wa mada kimi o sagashiteiru.

Gackt - Kimi ni Aitakute

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 37

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/22/2007 6:40:34 PM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalliopePurple

Lotus, there simply aren't as many FtMs that are willing to be public with anything. That's been my experience, especially here on CM where I'm friends with at least a handful of MtFs, but haven't talked to any fellow FtMs so far. And that holds true for the rest of my Internet communities as well.

From a surgical standpoint, it's a lot easier to take away than to create. It's also much more expensive.

I acknowledged that in my post above :)

quote:

Plus the operation is more detailed.

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to CalliopePurple)

Post #: 38

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/22/2007 10:56:18 PM

CalliopePurple

Posts: 2539
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: SeaTac area
Status: offline

Sorry...not all here today.

_____________________________

Kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute
hajimete kimi ni atta hoshizora no shita de.
Kimi ni tsutaetai todokanai omoi demo
boku no kokoro wa mada kimi o sagashiteiru.

Gackt - Kimi ni Aitakute

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 39

RE: Sissies - is it all about them? - 2/23/2007 2:28:15 AM

DigitBox

Posts: 154
Joined: 3/18/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

Ellen :)

We have a program coming up on this tomorrow (sort of) http://drkeith.warnerbros.com/

This was a good program. After watching it, I reflected on why men seem to go the distance to become their female identity and the F->M transformation wasn't as prevalent.

OK Ellen, tell me if I figured it all out yet :).. I surmise that the M--> F complete transformation is the majority because it is indeed a WOMAN's nature to correct any physical anomaly. Woman are notoriously vain, so this thought verified the reality of it all for me. I never doubted the physiology of gender dismorphia. My question was why didn't more F-->M take place. Men aren't as finicky :) Plus the operation is more detailed.

For some reason MtF is just more common. One idea I had was that it's just more common for certain errors in making a male brain be male whereas making a female brain may be less complicated since the fetus starts out more female and it takes a shot of super charged testosterone (dihydrotestosterone, the stuff that makes guys go bald or get prostate cancer) to kick start the formation of a male body.

A lot of crossgender identity is focussed on certain brain regions that are believed to encode gender identity. Often times the formation of the neurons are influenced by hormonal factors that are created during pre-natal development. Usually within a particular window of time. Miss the window and the child's brain is set to the wrong channel or somewhere inbetween channels and then the cross gender identity emerges as the child grows.

*shrug*

At least that's the going research plus my own two cents tacked on.

The desire to fix the problem is more driven by the need to have the mind feel that the body reflects what the mind feels it should be.

FtM's make a big deal out of their hormones, and surgeries just as MtF's do. The surgeries are just different and it's testosterone instead of estrogen and progesterone.

For me the sissies are a combination of crossdressing, and role play. Mix in a lump of fetish dressing and you have it. Seems pretty harmless to me. Just it's not everyone's cup of tea.

But it's definately a separate issue from actual transgenderism/transsexualism, or even crossdressing on it's own.

< Message edited by DigitBox -- 2/23/2007 2:29:57 AM >

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 40

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