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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:28:58 AM   
CreatfreeAccount


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So if you asked to be serviced in this or that way, the act is called servicing.  So, doms (among other things) service their subs?

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:29:41 AM   
ownedgirlie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: CreatfreeAccount

Thank you.  So if there is something new you would just LOVE to try out,  it could never become a reality for you if he did not like it or was not interested in it?

Bingo.  Unless he chose to involve someone else to do such an act with me.

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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:29:53 AM   
MsKatHouston


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quote:

So if there is something new you would just LOVE to try out,  it could never become a reality for you if he did not like it or was not interested in it?


I know this was not directed to me but answering the general question here

If my sub loved something I hated, it may become a reality...then again it may not.  I may loan him to someone else who does like it as a reward to him.  I may warm to the idea eventually and try it.  It may not happen at all.  However, if it was something he LOVED, we would have known about that long ago when we were getting involved and decided on compatibility before getting into a relationship.  He could have decided he could live without it or not gotten involved.  But I think he would have had to go on the assumption that though tastes do change and there is a possibility, that it is not likely to happen.  Decide accordingly.

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to CreatfreeAccount)
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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:30:53 AM   
ownedgirlie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: CreatfreeAccount

So if you asked to be serviced in this or that way, the act is called servicing.  So, doms (among other things) service their subs?


This post shows it is in reply to me, yet I have already said my Master doesn't service me in any way.  I do not ask to be serviced. Once again, I can not speak for other dominants.

(in reply to CreatfreeAccount)
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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:36:54 AM   
CreatfreeAccount


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quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

quote:

ORIGINAL: CreatfreeAccount

So if you asked to be serviced in this or that way, the act is called servicing.  So, doms (among other things) service their subs?


This post shows it is in reply to me, yet I have already said my Master doesn't service me in any way.  I do not ask to be serviced. Once again, I can not speak for other dominants.


I was curious if you were to 'ever' ask -what would happen.

Thanks for sharing.

My opinion is that when a dom decides to do a sub like that sub requests that is a form of servicing and the dom is submitting (submitting to cater to the subs request) in a sense.

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:38:36 AM   
Missokyst


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You keep stressing this point..

quote:

ORIGINAL: CreatfreeAccount
are you servicing his desires? 


Is there something wrong about making someone happy, or indulging them in something they want?  Why would being in a DS relationship be any different when it comes down to finding out what makes your partner happy?  I like chocolate.  Does that mean if I have a dom he must forbid me from ever indulging in it, to show me his manly dominance over me?
It has less to do with servicing your desires, than doing something to make you happy.
And how is that wrong?
Kyst


_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:42:04 AM   
SusanofO


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The Dominant can say "Yes" or "No". The submissive can only say "Yes", unless she (or, more likely he, if its a hetero D/s, M/f relationship) agree to discuss it and the Dominant agrees to her request, but there are "limits" to her submission (or his, in the case of a male sub) that have been previously agreed to between a the two people. The "slave" (supposedly) can never say "No."

Not to open the "differnece between a submissive and a slave topic.  But that is the bottom-line difference between a "vanilla" and a D/s relationship, IMO.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 2/27/2007 9:45:55 AM >


_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:42:30 AM   
ownedgirlie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: CreatfreeAccount

I was curious if you were to 'ever' ask -what would happen.

It's an unrealistic question for me.  I do not ask him to service me.  I ask if he would be interested in trying a particular new way to enjoy himself with me. 

quote:


Thanks for sharing.

You are welcome.

quote:


My opinion is that when a dom decides to do a sub like that sub requests that is a form of servicing and the dom is submitting (submitting to cater to the subs request) in a sense.

Perhaps.  Do you find that to be a bad thing?  What if it is something you have never thought of before, and you think "Wow, fantastic idea!  I wish I had thought of it!"  Will you never do it for your own pleasure because you think it would be servicing the sub? 


(in reply to CreatfreeAccount)
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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:43:25 AM   
CreatfreeAccount


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Thanks but it's not about "bad or good".  I'm not concerned with it being "wrong or right".

(in reply to Missokyst)
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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:45:24 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


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First you must divorce this idea that service = submission.  Providing a service to others/the world is the mark of a good person, it has nothing to do with being a dominant or a submissive.  A dominant still has the authority even when providing a service to their property.



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(in reply to CreatfreeAccount)
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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:45:30 AM   
MsKatHouston


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From: Houston, TX
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What is it exactly you are concerned about? 

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to CreatfreeAccount)
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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:45:42 AM   
CreatfreeAccount


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My point isnt to say
"it's a 'bad thing' to do what a sub asks you to do." 

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:46:38 AM   
KeirasSecret


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My Dom grants requests but I would not say he submits to them…if he did he would not be the Dom, now would he?

The difference is….these are things he would do it if he had thought of it himself or could read my mind to know I’d like to do it; as long as I am deserving of course.

This is not to be confused with those things he does that he knows I do not care for, but does anyway.

Be well,

_____________________________

It apears to me, the practice of "an eye for an eye" has finally taken it's toll; the majority are now walking around blind.

Bitching; whining in a louder voice.

If the truth hurts, change it!

(in reply to CreatfreeAccount)
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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:46:47 AM   
ownedgirlie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: CreatfreeAccount

My point isnt to say
"it's a 'bad thing' to do what a sub asks you to do." 

Then what is your point?  I am asking your opinion on dominants who "service" their subs as you say.  What are your thoughts on that?

(in reply to CreatfreeAccount)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:46:49 AM   
CreatfreeAccount


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Reread the title. 

If Doms service a sub's request.

(in reply to MsKatHouston)
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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:47:32 AM   
jauntyone


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From: Anchorage Alaska
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CreatfreeAccount

Do Dominants ever submit to a sub's request to do something specific to the sub that the sub likes?  If so, is the dominant being submissive when acting out the sub's fantasy for the sub?  If yes,  does that mean the sub has some type of control within the sub/dom relationship? 

There are many things that my girl likes that I go out of my way to do for her; it has nothing to do with 'submitting' to her wishes and everything to do with my love for her. Granted, I have the right to refuse; but to date I have yet to find a reason to. I don't think that my seeing to her happiness makes me less dominant and more submissive; I do however believe that it makes me a more thoughtfull Master, and a better husband.

(in reply to CreatfreeAccount)
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RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:47:56 AM   
Wildfleurs


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quote:

ORIGINAL: CreatfreeAccount

Do Dominants ever submit to a sub's request to do something specific to the sub that the sub likes?  If so, is the dominant being submissive when acting out the sub's fantasy for the sub?  If yes,  does that mean the sub has some type of control within the sub/dom relationship? 


My owner has done stuff that I've asked him to do but typically he does it 1) if it broadly interests him 2) he makes it his own.  For instance years ago I went to him with an interest in golden showers and so he had a definite interest in having me swallow his urine so we ended up doing that as well as him urinating on me.  I don't see it as me having control because there have also been requests that have been denied.

C~


_____________________________

"Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid." -despair.com

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(in reply to CreatfreeAccount)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:49:08 AM   
CreatfreeAccount


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You mean what's my question?  Reread the title. 

Here's a cut and paste to help satisfy you.


Thanks for sharing.

My opinion is that when a dom decides to do a sub like that sub requests that is a form of servicing and the dom is submitting (submitting to cater to the subs request) in a sense.

Good or bad?  Not relevant unless in your eyes it is. 

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:49:30 AM   
SusanofO


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Can you define what you mean by "request?" If I ask to go to KFC for dinner, and my Dominant says yes, I don't consider that "servicing my request". I consider that two people agreeing on where to go for dinner.

- Susan

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to Wildfleurs)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Dominants submit to requests? - 2/27/2007 9:50:02 AM   
MsKatHouston


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From: Houston, TX
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I don't need to re read the title, thank you.  But you've been answered pretty much the same from everyone yet you keep up on the same thing almost as if you disagree with what has been said thusfar.  So I was curious if you had a point you were trying to make that I am not understanding

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to CreatfreeAccount)
Profile   Post #: 60
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