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RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 1:22:54 PM   
GeekyGirl


Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline 		I get hundreds of emails...if you don't have time to say anything more interesting than "hello", then I'm not going to respond. Sorry. Of if you obviously are not what I specify I am looking for I usually won't respond either unless you say, "I know I am not what you're looking for...I was just wanting to talk to you as friends".

_____________________________

"It's nothing that I understand, but when in your arms you have complete power over me. So be gentle if you please, 'cause your hands are in my hair, but my heart is in your teeth and it makes me want to make you near me always."

(in reply to sublizzie)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 1:27:46 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline 		Damn it. Now I have to test your resolve!

_____________________________

I'm the guy your girl is thinking about when she is fucking you!

TrollTopia
Greedy Groupie!

The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

(in reply to GeekyGirl)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 1:39:01 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline 		Yup, Geeky means it.

Damn!


_____________________________

I'm the guy your girl is thinking about when she is fucking you!

TrollTopia
Greedy Groupie!

The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

(in reply to FukinTroll)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 2:00:14 PM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TantricOne

Have been on this site for some few years, was wondering why so many subs that are supposedly seeking a dom can't even reply to something as simple as a "hello", yes I have had some reply, from those who are sincere, but in the bigger view, do a lot of the "subs seeking dominant males" even really belong here? I think not, because they are claiming to be something they're not, as are the so-called dominants that use the lifestyle as an excuse to be cruel or players.............


You say you have been on this site for a few years, yet you only have 6 posts?  Amazing.  Anyway, though it seems like you would have seen the several threads on this that have cropped up in the last few mos, I will add in my two cents on the side of "If all you do is say "hello", then don't expect a reply".  As a matter of fact, from what I've read of the submissives' responses to these threads, I would say that unless you know your profile matches fairly closely to what their profile says they are seeking AND they are still seeking OR you want to cultivate a friend, that it had better be a fairly well thought-out email that you are going to send.  And even then, given the sheer volume of mail that I bet most submissives get, you still may not hear from them.  ~shrugs~  not the end of the world. 

I've been lucky.  I've become friends with a couple of submissives on here, I have an acquaintance with a female dominant on here, and I've had nice conversations over specific subjects with a few others.  I've also sent email out that was mainly to tell someone that I thought their post was good or that I had gone to their profile after reading their post and thought that their profile was nice or interesting or whatever...I sometimes heard back and sometimes did not.  Given my time constraints right now and other factors, the people I email with regularly are those who I choose to correspond with and I don't send many short notes anymore. 

(in reply to TantricOne)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 2:03:46 PM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		You are paying for someone else's bad manners. Most of us started out by reading profiles of people who sent us email and then sent out polite letters saying "Thank you however I don't think we have anything in common". Unfortunately the most usual response to a thanks but no thanks reply is something along the lines of "You're too fat to fuck anyway". That's nasty but better than "You stupid bitch, how dare you turn me down. I hope you get raped and cut into pieces".

The best way you can add to the chance of getting a response is by posting, and posting a lot. You see, we get a good opportunity to  see what you're really like over time that way. We get a sense of your personality, if you get huffy over the least little thing, if you are prone to anger etc. Hang out and post for a while and then contact someone. Make sure you read her profile and fit what she's looking for. Ask a question based on her interests or things she's mentioned. Don't just send out a hello and expect us to conclude you're a great guy from that. Because we won't.

(in reply to oblige)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 2:05:51 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		So many men working so hard to make me look good.  Thank god I don't have to do all the hard work myself...

(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 2:22:53 PM   
FelinePersuasion


Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline 		there are litterally hundreds of threadsabout this topic.  It comes off as whining by now.They do not answer because they do not w ish to plain and simple.

I know I don't bother to answer if it's a one liner, rude, or they clearly have not read my profile, that is when I had one beyond what I do now.
quote:

ORIGINAL: TantricOne

Have been on this site for some few years, was wondering why so many subs that are supposedly seeking a dom can't even reply to something as simple as a "hello",


_____________________________

Most of the time if it looks like BS, smells like BS, you probably should not t taste it to see if, in fact, it is BS.


(in reply to TantricOne)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 3:17:10 PM   
innatedesire


Posts: 111
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TantricOne

Have been on this site for some few years, was wondering why so many subs that are supposedly seeking a dom can't even reply to something as simple as a "hello", yes I have had some reply, from those who are sincere, but in the bigger view, do a lot of the "subs seeking dominant males" even really belong here? I think not, because they are claiming to be something they're not, as are the so-called dominants that use the lifestyle as an excuse to be cruel or players.............


Oh no I am not "twue" because i do not respond to a well thought out one word response such as "hello"........I am  devastated why did no one inform me that in order to be "twue" i must respond to such emails!!!  They really should put that in the  TOS don't you think??? I mean really it would save all us from questioning out "twue submissivenes" would it not?  And i bet i should also immediately call them Master, beg for a  collar, and move in immdiately!!  Who knew it was that simple.


< Message edited by innatedesire -- 3/1/2007 3:19:28 PM >

_____________________________

Never under estimate the stupidity of your fellow man

(in reply to TantricOne)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 3:26:56 PM   
SleepyBeast


Posts: 122
Joined: 2/22/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: innatedesire


quote:

ORIGINAL: TantricOne

Have been on this site for some few years, was wondering why so many subs that are supposedly seeking a dom can't even reply to something as simple as a "hello", yes I have had some reply, from those who are sincere, but in the bigger view, do a lot of the "subs seeking dominant males" even really belong here? I think not, because they are claiming to be something they're not, as are the so-called dominants that use the lifestyle as an excuse to be cruel or players.............


Oh no I am not "twue" because i do not respond to a well thought out one word response such as "hello"........I am  devastated why did no one inform me that in order to be "twue" i must respond to such emails!!!  They really should put that in the  TOS don't you think??? I mean really it would save all us from questioning out "twue submissivenes" would it not?  And i bet i should also immediately call them Master, beg for a  collar, and move in immdiately!!  Who knew it was that simple.




What, it wasn't in your "so you want to be a submissive" orientation package?


_____________________________

The voices in my head won't talk to me anymore, they said I scare them.

(in reply to innatedesire)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 5:38:11 PM   
WhiplashSmile


Posts: 1472
Joined: 6/8/2004
Status: offline
  • Yes, you need to say something besides starting up a dead ended conversation.
    • Share something about yourself
    • Share something about why you feel intestered in them.
    • Give them something to comment about or answer questions.
    • Think this applies when meeting people out in public for the first time. Applies everywhere you go...

  • If you don't hear back or there's no response, simply move onto the next.
  • Do you ever get messages in your inbox, if not perhaps tweak up your profile a little.
  • Keep in mind it might take some time to get back to you, sorting out all the mail they get.

(in reply to TantricOne)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 6:05:04 PM   
pissdoll


Posts: 343
Joined: 5/25/2005
Status: offline 		Internet guy:  hi

me:  hi

guy: address me as Sir

me: i don't call anyone sir i am not collared to

guy: very well, tell me about your bdsm experience, send me some nude photos, give me your yahoo, phone number, address, social security number, a pair of panties, and the key to the palace.

me:  WTF?????


i GET that it's hard for men on here.  women don't want form letters, freak letters, and especially freak form letters, but men shouldn't have to  waste an hour writing a different email to each woman who probably won't respond.

Whiplash has some great pointers.  also, i think it's more than okay to create a "form letter" about yourself, if you write a sentence or two FIRST that is personal to the person you are sending it to...to at least attempt to engage the reader.

in times when i am available, i have always been more likely to answer mail from men who mention things going on in their lives BEYOND the bdsm.  great, so you can torture me in the pit  beneath your garage, but tell me you also like to swing dance and you collect Turkish postal stamps, and i am SOOOOOO there!

(in reply to WhiplashSmile)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 6:27:15 PM   
GuidingLite


Posts: 233
Joined: 12/10/2006
Status: offline 		Quote: there are litterally hundreds of threadsabout this topic.  It comes off as whining by now.They do not answer because they do not w ish to plain and simple.

I know I don't bother to answer if it's a one liner, rude, or they clearly have not read my profile, that is when I had one beyond what I do now. End Quote

Dont be rude to him becoz he has a legit problem and has a right to complain.  your not in his shoes so ahve some patience.

people for the record only 1 out of every guy on here is decent and the rest dont give a dam if their polite or not.  And the same with the women.  Who most are probably men anywaz.   Most are not even serious about meeting anyone.  Most dont take this seriously.  Its a big cyber game for most.  Game playing, flirting, etc is the extent of most on here.  It's no wonder people cant meet anyone.

(in reply to FelinePersuasion)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 6:28:41 PM   
slavemaia


Posts: 395
Joined: 8/26/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TantricOne

Have been on this site for some few years, was wondering why so many subs that are supposedly seeking a dom can't even reply to something as simple as a "hello", yes I have had some reply, from those who are sincere, but in the bigger view, do a lot of the "subs seeking dominant males" even really belong here? I think not, because they are claiming to be something they're not, as are the so-called dominants that use the lifestyle as an excuse to be cruel or players.............


You know the old expression "actions speak louder than words"? Trust the actions. No response? Not interested. No need to judge anyone though. When i was still free i was inundated with emails. i did respond to most just as a courtesy. But that's me and i had the time to do so then.
 
i am a human being first, then a slave - that's how it is. When someone emails me with "hello" i think "oh brother". That's what i think. i view emails as a form of communication. Would i be intrigued with someone who called me on the phone and said hello and expected me to be all excited to get with them? No. Perhaps in your correspondence you may find it more rewarding to talk about what you're interested in and why you specifically mailed that particular sub. At least it makes them feel like a person and not a number and gives them something to respond to. Just a suggestion.

_____________________________


She reaches up, not for the apple, but for what causes it to be there.
slave to love - - Chairman's maia

(in reply to TantricOne)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 6:35:03 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

So many men working so hard to make me look good.  Thank god I don't have to do all the hard work myself...
Ahh but do not forget, at one time you did do the work..and by posting,people got to know you better, and hence you made yourself look good ...so my advice to the OP is maybe you should try posting more, it gives a submissive more chances to get to know you by reading about how you feel in subjects and develop a certain regard for your way of thought...intelligient or humorous postings can make a submissive salivate....Tempting 

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 6:47:23 PM   
patina


Posts: 493
Joined: 9/14/2006
From: no
Status: offline

How much effort did it take to write "hello"?   I have always found one word emails one of the most annoying kind of all.. things like "ur cute", "hi", "whata babe!" tended to get deleted and no response, if a person puts no effort into life they get nothing back... just the way it is.

Why should I take the time and effort he obviously did not wish to give me. 
[/quote]

_____________________________

a diamond in the rough

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 7:10:38 PM   
MsCfromMelbourne


Posts: 777
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline 		Patrick

When a sub has the hots for you and you have the hots for her....its magical!  If she doesn't have the hots for you, why do you want a rejection letter? 

Why are you trying to control strangers (and getting frustrated that you cannot)?  Dominants can only control their own submissives : not the whole world! 

Move on and look for someone who is keen on you



It may not even be you that is being rejected - she may never have seen your email or have just met someone else.  Or it may be a guy pretending to be a girl (why?  To have a bit of fun at your expense?)  Why engage one of those weirdos in email ping pong?

Count your lucky stars the wrong ones don't waste your time.  If you really want a sub (not just online roleplaying and games)  then find your local munch and BDSM club(s), go along, make friends with as many people as possible and impress the girls with your wit and charm.  You should be snapped up!  Collarme is fun for some but it is not working for you (obviously)

< Message edited by MsCfromMelbourne -- 3/1/2007 7:18:49 PM >

(in reply to TantricOne)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 7:17:11 PM   
boltaction


Posts: 53
Joined: 12/1/2005
Status: offline 		After getting to know a few subs here, I always hear these three things most doms have in common:

1. They can't spel
2. say "hello. end message" and expect reciprocation
3. demand submission, then when the sub says that's not how it works they call her a cunt.

So what am I adding to the conversation? There are many men who have psychological, anger or even women issues who glom onto the BDSM lifestyle because all they can see are girls dressed provocatively asking for a master.

And then the rules! Oh my god, the amount of silly power games people play on each other in this lifestyle. In the Pacific Northwest we have a lot of good people but when I was just starting there would be mind games every munch. I'm so glad I know better.

(in reply to patina)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 7:21:39 PM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline 		I reply to two kinds of email on this site.  The first is when the sender appeals to me on first impression.  The second is when they say something that peaks my interest.  If it doesn't fall into those two categories, I rarely respond.  I used to respond to every letter I got.  Most were to say thank you, but no thank you.  That just started a volley of them trying to convince me that they were the dom for me.  It's just easier not to answer.

So yeah...like Katy said.  No answer means we're not interested.

(in reply to TantricOne)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 8:51:45 PM   
innatedesire


Posts: 111
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SleepyBeast


quote:

ORIGINAL: innatedesire


quote:

ORIGINAL: TantricOne

Have been on this site for some few years, was wondering why so many subs that are supposedly seeking a dom can't even reply to something as simple as a "hello", yes I have had some reply, from those who are sincere, but in the bigger view, do a lot of the "subs seeking dominant males" even really belong here? I think not, because they are claiming to be something they're not, as are the so-called dominants that use the lifestyle as an excuse to be cruel or players.............


Oh no I am not "twue" because i do not respond to a well thought out one word response such as "hello"........I am  devastated why did no one inform me that in order to be "twue" i must respond to such emails!!!  They really should put that in the  TOS don't you think??? I mean really it would save all us from questioning out "twue submissivenes" would it not?  And i bet i should also immediately call them Master, beg for a  collar, and move in immdiately!!  Who knew it was that simple.




What, it wasn't in your "so you want to be a submissive" orientation package?



No and here all this time i thought i was a "true submissive" i am devastated and will now have to go back and  re-write my entire profile.


_____________________________

Never under estimate the stupidity of your fellow man

(in reply to SleepyBeast)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: sincere or not - 3/1/2007 8:59:30 PM   
SleepyBeast


Posts: 122
Joined: 2/22/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: innatedesire

No and here all this time i thought i was a "true submissive" i am devastated and will now have to go back and  re-write my entire profile.



You could always say you are a "submissive 2.0 LE (Limited Edition)" and the new LE submissives do not come with an autoreply function.

_____________________________

The voices in my head won't talk to me anymore, they said I scare them.

(in reply to innatedesire)
Profile   Post #: 40
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