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My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard limit for most submissives


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My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard lim... - 3/6/2007 8:01:22 AM   
SirDiscipliner69


Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline 		My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard limit for most submissives.

It is more of a mindset coupled with the physical act that I enjoy. It is definitely a power play item and yes you are right it can set off triggers from past abuse or tramatic experiences.

I use to just be able to enjoy just the face tapping which I personally thought was enough of a turn on for Both but have recently pushed the envelope with very hard faceslapping that was a major turn on for Both. Before I use to use it just as a power attention getter.

For Me it needs to be done with safety in mind as not to shake the brain on impact not leave permanant damage. The slow buildup just as in spanking with the proper verbage is essential. Warming up physically and mentally to Me is the key.

Years gone by I use to resolutely apply such quietly and expected My submissive to accept stoicly. Now verbal is delicious and her response is encouraged to be as audible as possible.

I know I need to be careful in anything that could have been done in an prior abusive relationship but honest communication and reacting to that is essential.

Currently enjoying various forms of rape play, breath play, faceslapping, knife play, stragulation, aphixation and powerplay...all which are hard limits to many and could set off trama from past abuse. It really takes the right partner and communication to make it work which is why constant checking and reassurance works for Me.

I have interesting enjoyed the TPE of aphixiation in which it was more of a yes I can do it attitude by her. Working and warming up breath play to strangulation to aphixiation in a long time period and very ritualistic approach while talking to her has been pleasurable for Both.

Applying a clear bag over her head and drawing the cord and looking into her eyes as I talk to her is intensity maxium for Us. her trust and My care result in something that is so imtense in mindset. Our first endevour did result in her crying a tear after I took the bag off after a few moments. I softly talked to her and soothed her and asked her how she was. she told Me it scared her. I told her she was safe and that We did not need to do it anymore and I was proud of her for doing it.

After a few seconds she got the face of determinatin and almost barked back at Me that she was ok and she wanted to do it again. Surprised but accomidating I reapplied the bag and watched to My amazement as her determination came across her face as she took deep breaths and sucked the bag to tight to her face, which took great effort as it was a large bag.

Concerned I released it as I was wondering her mindset and if she were not just suicidal. It was later thru talking in afterglow of aftercare that she always had fantasies of doing that to the point of passing out and then being revieved. Looks like I need to get My certification in artifical respiration.

This is not for everyone nor do I recommend such dangerous behavioue. This form of edge play seems to work for Us and obviously will be scorned on and even attacked by some. All I can say is what works for you and does not harm another should be suffice.

I guess what I was trying to relate was forms of edge play and potential ramifications from previous abuse.

Being old the old ways I know My methods differ from many. My practice is not the true way nor do I espouse a true way but merley an insight to My perception as I continue to evolve.

What is one person's ceiling is another person's floor.

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©
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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:06:59 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Thanks for posting a thought provoking opinion of your own! 

It is good to know that your ceiling is about where my floor begins. 

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)
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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:07:32 AM   
takemeforyourown


Posts: 430
Joined: 2/24/2007
Status: offline 		The description of your play scares the &*$%# out of me, yet I respect that you are mindful of safety.  But, I can't help thinking about whether you two might go too far one day.  How tragic that would be...

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)
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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:27:49 AM   
SirDiscipliner69


Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL:
Thanks for posting a thought provoking opinion of your own! 
It is good to know that your ceiling is about where my floor begins. 

Any time crappy...but actually it might be a bit higher...

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:28:42 AM   
onestandingstill


Posts: 1335
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline 		I agree face slapping with force is a limit for most subs. Sad, but true. I too at the moment have that as a limit due to dental issues, but before that I was OK with it as long as it left no marks.
What I found is while it happened things were fine, but once I got whiplash and it took two months for my neck to heal.
I also don't enjoy extreme breath play as you have no idea where the carbon levels are till they've passed a danger point that even CPR can't fix sometimes.
Mild to medium breath play is way hot, but to go into something the Dom does not have a way to have control over just seems like it's foolish for me to want to participate.
Now if I was collared my limits with my owner would not prevent me from doing extreme breath play till I passed out, but he'd know I felt it was a unnecessary unsafe risk IMO.
I think breath play till you pass out is a dangerous as telling your sub to stand in a tub of water and throwing a plugged appliance in with her.
Some things you can't control in that can cause permanent injury or death. To me this is not just edge play it's flirting with the grim reaper and only he's in charge some times when the sub passes out even with the most knowledgeable Dom.

A question for you. If you caused her brain damage are you going to take care of her and all her responsibilities for the rest of your life over damaging her permanently, are you willing to stand before her loved ones if she dies and explain why that person is no longer here?
If you're not willing to both of these you shouldn't be taking people this far.
suzanne


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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:32:06 AM   
SirDiscipliner69


Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: takemeforyourown

The description of your play scares the &*$%# out of me, yet I respect that you are mindful of safety.  But, I can't help thinking about whether you two might go too far one day.  How tragic that would be...

That could be a possibility...

I have discussed it before...


Would a Dominant be in the right if they sent a submissive to a hospital for care for what was adminsistered in a session even though it was within the submissive's consent and limits?
http://www.collarchat.com/m_828246/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm

So if a dominant was involved in a scene with breath play or noose play and the submissive "died" but was rescitated by a safety monitor or paramedic would the dominant be morally guilty of killing the submissive?
http://www.collarchat.com/m_825775/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm

Should a dominant be subjected to the same implements that he subjects his submissive to?
http://www.collarchat.com/m_811560/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm

Sorry LuckyAlbatross  for beating you to the listings....


Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

(in reply to takemeforyourown)
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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:33:17 AM   
SirDiscipliner69


Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: onestandingstill
If you caused her brain damage are you going to take care of her and all her responsibilities for the rest of your life over damaging her permanently, are you willing to stand before her loved ones if she dies and explain why that person is no longer here?


Yes.

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

(in reply to onestandingstill)
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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:33:50 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

quote:

ORIGINAL:
Thanks for posting a thought provoking opinion of your own! 
It is good to know that your ceiling is about where my floor begins. 

Any time crappy...but actually it might be a bit higher...

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©


Ross, unlike you, I don't care if your play is "higher" or "lower" than mine.  My point was that you ruined what could have been your first decent thought provoking insight into you that I have seen you post.  You just had to add a line about most people being under your level of play.  Which is why I made the sarcastic comment about who's play was what.

< Message edited by SimplyMichael -- 3/6/2007 8:35:19 AM >

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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:40:59 AM   
SirDiscipliner69


Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL:  Which is why I made the sarcastic comment about who's play was what.


I have never known you to make any other comments other than sarcastic crappy. Sorry if you thought I was belittling others...it was actually meant as a disclaimer.

Do not try this at home.

As NOT seen on TV.

Not the real beatles.

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:44:30 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

This is not for everyone nor do I recommend such dangerous behavioue (sic).


Interesting.  For someone not recommending it you certainly provided a detailed accounting.


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- Albert Einstein

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)
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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:46:29 AM   
SirDiscipliner69


Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

This is not for everyone nor do I recommend such dangerous behavioue (sic).


Interesting.  For someone not recommending it you certainly provided a detailed accounting.


Yes it is Sic(k) behaviour indeed....did it make you hot?

I read about it once in a book...yes...that is it....

Ross
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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:55:00 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Katy,

I think what Ross was trying to say is the equivelent of "don't try this at home" unless you are aware of and are prepared to deal with the risks.

(in reply to KatyLied)
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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:56:55 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Breath play is something I highly doubt I'd ever do.  Limit of the erectile variety.   

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 8:57:14 AM   
mixielicous


Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline 		fast reply

being a slave who was prior in an abusive relationship, i felt compelled to reply - espcially because i dont hold any of those limits [except the bag, i would imagine]

face slapping evolved much in my relationship as it had in yours. There is nothing so far, to trigger bad memories or flashback, but then again, He wont punch or backhand me for those specific reasons. Rape play, yea we do it, even as a victim of rape.

i used to hold an unnatural fear of rape, nightmares and the like since i was a teen. then a few years ago, i experienced the real deal, and lucky for me, that was me facing my fear, i didnt suffer much trauma and as a result, rape fantasy is one hot mamma for me, on many levels.

there is one edge play, that we have played and left me in tears. ok this might sound kinda silly when i was little my younger brother [by only 14 months] would sit on my head with a pillow [pffft] he thought it was funny i guess but now if someone puts a pillow on my face with pressure i am frantic - so i guess its ok if you like that

but my super duper please dont do that i WILL cry is the hand over the mouth and nose. . its so much scarier than just a hand around the neck, coz there is NOTHING to suck in, no mercy, no hope, just nothing. WOW thats a scarey one, i can imagine much like the bag

woooo for scarey play hahaha

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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 9:03:31 AM   
onestandingstill


Posts: 1335
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

quote:

ORIGINAL: onestandingstill
If you caused her brain damage are you going to take care of her and all her responsibilities for the rest of your life over damaging her permanently, are you willing to stand before her loved ones if she dies and explain why that person is no longer here?


Yes.

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

Easy to say, but hard to live the rest of your life with Sir.
Thanks for your answer.
Knowing you personally some, I think indeed you're telling the truth that you'd try to do the right thing and I understand the risk is worth it to you.
It's just not worth it to me unless I'm owned and collared and it's ordered.

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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 9:07:01 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

but my super duper please dont do that i WILL cry is the hand over the mouth and nose. . its so much scarier than just a hand around the neck, coz there is NOTHING to suck in, no mercy, no hope, just nothing. WOW thats a scarey one, i can imagine much like the bag


I do that all the time and find it quite hot and easy to control, unlike a bag.  Because it is SO big for most people, you don't even have to come close to the edge for it to be hot, assuming you find it hot in the first place.

(in reply to mixielicous)
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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 9:13:45 AM   
mixielicous


Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

quote:

but my super duper please dont do that i WILL cry is the hand over the mouth and nose. . its so much scarier than just a hand around the neck, coz there is NOTHING to suck in, no mercy, no hope, just nothing. WOW thats a scarey one, i can imagine much like the bag


I do that all the time and find it quite hot and easy to control, unlike a bag. Because it is SO big for most people, you don't even have to come close to the edge for it to be hot, assuming you find it hot in the first place.


theres little i dont enjoy

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"lets just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy"


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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 9:14:13 AM   
SirDiscipliner69


Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: onestandingstill

Easy to say, but hard to live the rest of your life with Sir. Thanks for your answer.
Knowing you personally some, I think indeed you're telling the truth that you'd try to do the right thing and I understand the risk is worth it to you.It's just not worth it to me unless I'm owned and collared and it's ordered.

Thank you. Those see what I chose to share with them. I would never order a hard limit. It would have to be begged for Me to do it from her. Yes it would be hard to live with very much. Responsiblity is just that...it extends past the session.

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 9:17:03 AM   
SirDiscipliner69


Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael
I think what Ross was trying to say is the equivelent of "don't try this at home" unless you are aware of and are prepared to deal with the risks.

True. Even being prepared for it doesn't really prepare you.

Anybody true those Herhey Kissables?  Special Dark Mildly sweet chocolate....now that is adicting!!!!!

Admittedly among other things I am a chocoholic!



Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

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RE: My perception of face slapping is it more of a hard... - 3/6/2007 9:18:23 AM   
nyrisa


Posts: 1830
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous

fast reply

there is one edge play, that we have played and left me in tears. ok this might sound kinda silly when i was little my younger brother [by only 14 months] would sit on my head with a pillow [pffft] he thought it was funny i guess but now if someone puts a pillow on my face with pressure i am frantic - so i guess its ok if you like that




Oh, man; does that bring back post traumatic memories. *L* My older brothers used to duck my head under the water when we were swimming. To them, it was a game, to me, it was absolute terror. To this day, I go absolutely berserk if anyone tries to duck me.


_____________________________

A true lady takes off her dignity with her clothes and does her whorish best. At other times you can be as modest and dignified as your persona requires. Robert Heinlein

The last thing I want to do is hurt you...but it is still on my list.

(in reply to mixielicous)
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