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WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 8:43:16 AM

Wildfleurs

Posts: 1650
Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
Status: offline

Okay I didn't want to hijack existing threads from people looking for their scene but I don't get it. There are ten million search engines, its pretty hard to be online and not know about yahoo or google. And people seem to be managing to find the personals sites but can't find a bdsm group?

Someone explain it to me - is it stupidity or fear?

C~

_____________________________

"Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid." -despair.com

~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The heart of it all - http://www.wildfleurs.com
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Post #: 1

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 8:50:36 AM

velvetears

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Joined: 6/19/2006
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Is this a rant or an actual question??

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RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 8:52:32 AM

SimplyMichael

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Joined: 1/7/2007
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Both

(in reply to velvetears)

Post #: 3

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 8:56:12 AM

Celeste43

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline

I live in a small town. If I google BDSM and the name of my town, nothing appears. I'm not willing to drive two and a half hours one way to get a better choice or one and a half hours the other way where there's just one group.

Nor am I willing to pay a babysitter for all those hours since I'd be out all night. Some of us don't have any local scenes. Now for all I know there might be a private group the next town over but it won't come up in a search.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 4

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 8:58:26 AM

goodpet

Posts: 458
Joined: 6/8/2005
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It is both velvetears, rant and question.

They don't because they are not ready for real life. They think oh my job, oh my husband/wife, oh my kids.. i can really do this.. so they do the online things.

I spent over a year reading and talking online before i had a couple of kinky date encounters, the second one was not the best, i saw the potential for a lot of non-consensul danger, so knew i needed more then online contacts and so then ventured in the local groups.. It is timeing and needs/wants outweighing the fear.

as to not finding the local groups.. i'm with you on the bewilderness. there are groups all over... you might have to dive a bit they are there.

In SC, the most non-kinky place i can think of, there were 8 groups within a 2 hour drive.

(in reply to velvetears)

Post #: 5

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 8:59:19 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

i guess this is in reference to the newbie searching for local scenes as an assignment for his Mistress.

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Post #: 6

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 9:07:33 AM

FelinePersuasion

Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
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I am notinterested in having to drive a few hours away, since I don't drive and I don't have any one to hitch rides with, I choose not to participate in "local scene" Because I have something against one group personally and the rest I just don't care for the memebers. Then again I'm not on here asking where my groups are lol.

quote:

ORIGINAL: goodpet

They don't because they are not ready for real life.

there are groups all over... you might have to dive a bit they are there.

_____________________________

Most of the time if it looks like BS, smells like BS, you probably should not t taste it to see if, in fact, it is BS.

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Post #: 7

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 9:20:11 AM

domiguy

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Joined: 5/2/2006
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I'm going to take the other side of this argument for just a second. I do read threads where people are complaining about findng a group in their area...If this thread is in regards to those folks, I have no clue as to why they post? If it is directed to the rest of the folks out here, as to why we don't attend functions then I will be more than happy to answer.

I don't particularily like "groups" of people who think they are dfferent from the rest....I recently was eating a late nite burrito after a drink or twenty and I came across some "goths"...I glanced at one, as I completed my order, and she caught my look and said "oh you don't like us because we are different than you." I replied ..."No. I don't like it because you are indistinguishable from everyone else that you are with, you are no different than anyone else."

I personally have little desire to see middle aged folks squeezed into black leather or corsetts, like wiener casings...Who think they are different but have some how managed to all be the same.

< Message edited by domiguy -- 3/18/2007 9:40:18 AM >

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Post #: 8

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 9:55:26 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy
I personally have little desire to see middle aged folks squeezed into black leather or corsetts, like wiener casings...Who think they are different but have some how managed to all be the same.

you just described the last fetish party i attended recently. those in my age group outnumbered the 20 somethings however to see someone like my breast size squeezed into latex - it was horrible!

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 9

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 9:58:44 AM

Wildfleurs

Posts: 1650
Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
Status: offline

Using fast reply...

Its a question that was prefaced with a slight rant. But its not about or towards people who aren't active in their scene, I think thats really a personal choice. Its also not towards people like you Celeste who know whats available, but whats available is hours away.

It was more because I saw two different threads where people were asking about their local scene when it is really as simple as entering your city or state and the word bdsm or the word munch in a search engine. And I've seen it before, people who can find all sorts of chat rooms, personal sites, and other websites but can't seem to find a local munch group (in cases where there is actually one). I just find it strange and was looking for some sort of rational explanation of why it occurs.

C~

_____________________________

"Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid." -despair.com

~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The heart of it all - http://www.wildfleurs.com
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 10

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 10:01:54 AM

domiguy

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Joined: 5/2/2006
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Perhaps they are all "vulnerable adults?"

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Post #: 11

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 10:04:33 AM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs

Okay I didn't want to hijack existing threads from people looking for their scene but I don't get it. There are ten million search engines, its pretty hard to be online and not know about yahoo or google. And people seem to be managing to find the personals sites but can't find a bdsm group?

Someone explain it to me - is it stupidity or fear?

C~

Neither. I've been looking for the scene in Greensboro. The sites I've found have dead links or nobody answers their e-mail to answer questions. Also, plenty of places don't let anybody in under 21, so the 18-20 year olds have to look extra hard.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Wildfleurs)

Post #: 12

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 10:05:41 AM

kyraofMists

Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs

It was more because I saw two different threads where people were asking about their local scene when it is really as simple as entering your city or state and the word bdsm or the word munch in a search engine. And I've seen it before, people who can find all sorts of chat rooms, personal sites, and other websites but can't seem to find a local munch group (in cases where there is actually one). I just find it strange and was looking for some sort of rational explanation of why it occurs.

C~

I think it is possible that for some using a search engine is more impersonal. I know that when we visit other cities, he wants to know the lifestyle places that are available. I can google the area and find information or I can come here and ask people. I do both, but I find that in coming here, I might actually connect with people from the area, learn a little about the personality of the group and have someone to meet when we actually arrive.

Knight's kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to Wildfleurs)

Post #: 13

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 10:08:32 AM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

koM..Is scaring me....Perhaps she should have her own advice column...That is a very nice answer that makes perfect sense.

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Post #: 14

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 10:09:30 AM

daddysliloneds

Posts: 1351
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs

Okay I didn't want to hijack existing threads from people looking for their scene but I don't get it. There are ten million search engines, its pretty hard to be online and not know about yahoo or google. And people seem to be managing to find the personals sites but can't find a bdsm group?

Someone explain it to me - is it stupidity or fear?

C~

it's neither, then again, assuming that it can only be one of two things makes you appear to be the stupid one now doesn't it?

(in reply to Wildfleurs)

Post #: 15

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 10:09:43 AM

kyraofMists

Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

koM..Is scaring me....Perhaps she should have her own advice column...That is a very nice answer that makes perfect sense.

Be afraid... be very, very afraid LOL

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 16

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 10:15:58 AM

Wildfleurs

Posts: 1650
Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
Status: offline

thanks kyra and Aquatic, both of those answers make sense. When I was under 21 I had the same problem, my solution isn't one I would condone but it was simply a don't ask don't tell and back then the groups weren't as anal about the IDs and such.

daddysliloneds - if I were assuming it would be a sentence/statement not a question, hence the question mark.

C~

_____________________________

"Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid." -despair.com

~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The heart of it all - http://www.wildfleurs.com
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

(in reply to kyraofMists)

Post #: 17

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 10:19:49 AM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: daddysliloneds

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs

Okay I didn't want to hijack existing threads from people looking for their scene but I don't get it. There are ten million search engines, its pretty hard to be online and not know about yahoo or google. And people seem to be managing to find the personals sites but can't find a bdsm group?

Someone explain it to me - is it stupidity or fear?

C~

it's neither, then again, assuming that it can only be one of two things makes you appear to be the stupid one now doesn't it?

Or option number 3...."Vulnerable Adults"....Only three possible explanations.

_____________________________

(in reply to daddysliloneds)

Post #: 18

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 10:22:14 AM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs

thanks kyra and Aquatic, both of those answers make sense. When I was under 21 I had the same problem, my solution isn't one I would condone but it was simply a don't ask don't tell and back then the groups weren't as anal about the IDs and such.

daddysliloneds - if I were assuming it would be a sentence/statement not a question, hence the question mark.

C~

*nods* I've thought of making a post to try and find the scene but I'm sure everyone gets annoyed of reading them so I don't want to. On the other hand, I really can't seem to find it on my own. I don't know, maybe I'm not looking hard enough but dead links and no-answers do make for a frustrating search!

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Wildfleurs)

Post #: 19

RE: WTF - You can find collarme but not your scene? - 3/18/2007 10:28:43 AM

daddysliloneds

Posts: 1351
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs
daddysliloneds - if I were assuming it would be a sentence/statement not a question, hence the question mark.
C~

i have a masters degree in english; the punctuation at the end of the statement doesn't imply or change the meaning of the words used...

care to try again?

(in reply to Wildfleurs)

Post #: 20

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