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profiles.... - 3/28/2007 4:31:34 AM

redsky

Posts: 228
Joined: 12/28/2006
From: UK
Status: offline

hello A/all, i am just wondering.... do some profiles on here seem to be a little 'aggressive'? & i dont just mean the Dom/Dommes....a few submissive profiles i have seen on here are actually quite outrageous & forthcoming about what they WANT.

im just thinking, how is anyone supposed to feel comfortable messaging someone else if their profile starts off with 'DONT WASTE MY TIME'

in my opinion some profiles are just down right mean & sour, before i met Master Jake i used to be afraid to contact some Doms incase they thought me unreal or fake. i know there are fakers on here, we all know that, but by ranting about what or who you demand or do NOT want to message you, doesnt that kinda make you unwilling to give everyone a chance?
it may just be me......
thanks for reading this...

_____________________________

Post #: 1

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 4:34:19 AM

bandit25

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

I suppose some do, but I think it's an attempt to weed out those one simply isn't interested in. I mean, if one isn't interested in pain, for example, that may feature quite prominently in that person's profile. It's most distressing to have to explain over and over again that one simply isn't interested.

(in reply to redsky)

Post #: 2

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 4:36:41 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

redsky it is different strokes for different folks. Some people thrive on aggression. Stick to what fits you and respect others crave.

(in reply to redsky)

Post #: 3

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 4:39:36 AM

redsky

Posts: 228
Joined: 12/28/2006
From: UK
Status: offline

thank You. i didnt mean any disrespect whatsoever, im still pretty new to this & even though i have a Master i still have questions is all.

_____________________________

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 4

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 4:41:53 AM

Lashra

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline

No, I think its just people are tired of fucking around and put it rather bluntly what it is (or isn't) that they are looking for. Mine plainly states NO Dominant/Gorean males contact me asking to be dominated or asking me to be a sub, I am not interested. I say that due to the number of emails I was recieving asking for that.

Some people like to be nice, some people like to be blunt. I'll go with blunt.

~Lashra

_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”

(in reply to redsky)

Post #: 5

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 5:33:02 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

i'm blunt and at one time (on another site) - i worded serious replies only not interested in time wasters and listed my dislikes before even talking about me. those who didn't take the time to read my profile were immediately blocked. i'm a woman who knows what she wants in a man. i have a right to demand it. mho

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to redsky)

Post #: 6

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 5:34:14 AM

sillygirl09

Posts: 446
Joined: 1/31/2007
From: New Jersey
Status: offline

Redsky, I never approach people like that either I have no desire to prove to someone with that attitude that I am indeed very real.

(in reply to redsky)

Post #: 7

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 5:37:52 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

edited for double posting

< Message edited by sambamanslilgirl -- 3/28/2007 5:38:40 AM >

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to redsky)

Post #: 8

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 5:43:26 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

Sometimes (okay often) you have to be blunt for the clueless people, it seems the only way to get through to them. Starting a profile off with a disclaimer may seem rude, but I can understand why people do it. Also, many of us aren't here in an attempt to mass market ourselves, we'd prefer a smaller, more select market to choose from. If disclaimers can help weed some people out it's all good.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Post #: 9

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 5:59:39 AM

WhiplashSmile

Posts: 1472
Joined: 6/8/2004
Status: offline

What a great morning topic this is!

Many people appear to be rather Jaded from others not reading their profiles.
You'd be stunned at some of the dumbass emails that hit the inBOX, I know of a
few women that have had literally over 400 emails in one day. Probally about
90% is from people that don't bother reading the profile, or come off sounding
like they are typing out some script from a scene play.

When I read a profile, I try to respond in an appropriate manner. There have
been a few cases where I was responding to a Use me, abuse me, hurt me
extreme profile, that I myself kicked the doors wide open and typed out things
as if it were from a scripted scene play. I figured we could get down to basic
human communication later. I was not trying to be rude about it, just give an
honest response or reply to the profile.

Some of you might be Gasping at the thoughts that I have done this myself!
Yes, I'm a twisted pervy soul like the rest of ya! However there is a deeply
human side to me. That has interests in things outside of BDSM.

I've had some really great message exchanges with wonderful human beings
on this site. Then a few Nut jobs as well. There are those reading this post
that know I just don't talk all about sex. Perhaps a few that recieved some
of the scripted Porn intentions of use will read this, and will be shocked..
however if they read their own friggen profiles they should be able to figure
out why! LOL.... Some of these profiles are rather extreme.

Anybody who writes a profile, should be aware that people will read it,
and will respond according to their first reactions to it.

I know I generally tend to pass by the profiles, that come off Jaded harsh
and bitter. I personally don't want to provoke an already pissed off
person. I move on to seeing who's next on the recent list.

I myself came up with my own tactic on my profile for weeding out the
ones I don't want. A real time saver by having a specific list of things.
Much better than playing the 50 Question IM game..

< Message edited by WhiplashSmile -- 3/28/2007 6:02:44 AM >

(in reply to redsky)

Post #: 10

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 5:59:59 AM

TheSensualist

Posts: 3
Joined: 2/18/2007
From: London, England
Status: offline

Is this something seen on mainly female profiles? I can't imagine guys being so bombarded that they have to filter replies before they're even written.

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 11

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 6:04:22 AM

Morghan

Posts: 99
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

I've known of at least one very young, very 'pretty' guy who got bombarded. He was getting emails from both genders that overhwelmed him. I try not to put a long list of 'don't bother' messages in my profile, but I did have to post something about acceptable age ranges. One too many emails from sixty-somethings.

(in reply to TheSensualist)

Post #: 12

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 6:05:55 AM

TheSensualist

Posts: 3
Joined: 2/18/2007
From: London, England
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiplashSmile
When I read a profile, I try to respond in an appropriate manner. There have
been a few cases where I was responding to a Use me, abuse me, hurt me
extreme profile, that I myself kicked the doors wide open and typed out things
as if it were from a scripted scene play. I figured we could get down to basic
human communication later. I was not trying to be rude about it, just give an
honest response or reply to the profile.

I don't generally reply to those kinds of profiles myself as I have a sneaking suspicion that most are written by guys looking for email excitement. I don't know, they just don't "feel" like they're written by a woman, if you know what I mean. Statistically some obviously are but I suspect most of them aren't.

(in reply to WhiplashSmile)

Post #: 13

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 6:12:24 AM

onestandingstill

Posts: 1335
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline

I think many of us become jaded by the mass of selfish idiocy we have thrust down our E-Mail boxes constantly.
In that the frustration flows over into the personal messages in peoples profiles.
Some feel even when they scream from a fog horn they are not looking and are still contacted with hey I'm coming to your town for a visit want to meet me in a hotel room, or on your knees bitch when you write back to me the Grand Poo Bah of all time types of messages.
I think, like you the idiots are going to write you even if you claimed to have aids or something because they see your photo or stats and write without ever reading the profile attached.
I too am one with a lot of negative connotations and burnt attitude coming through in my profile.
If the frustration is evident in the words they write, if you don't meet the criteria of what they say they want or seek just move to the next profile till you read one that presents the energy you want to pursue.
You won't change the blunt forthright expressions of Doms or subs that aggressively state their limits up front more than a blurb about what they dream they can obtain.
suzanne

(in reply to redsky)

Post #: 14

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 6:33:03 AM

NikkiRogers

Posts: 4
Joined: 8/5/2006
Status: offline

I completely agree with Suzanne. The shallow mentality and arrogance of some on this sites inhabitants is enough to drive a person to homicidal tendacies at times. How much effort does it take to read the paragraph and/or recent blog entires? It is plain rude to completely ignore a profile's content. If the person you are taking an interest in has taken the necassary time to post a paragraph or maintain an up to date blog then it is simply well mannered to take the necassary time to read it. Worst still are the shallow narrow minded and immature people that after recieveing a polite decline or rejection for an advance they made without reading a blog or paragraph then launch personal attacks upon someone. Where do these people get off!!! I'm seriously debating putting a code word in my paragraph and refusing to speak to anyone until they have given me this code word as proof they have read my paragraph.

Nikki xxxx

(in reply to onestandingstill)

Post #: 15

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 7:05:18 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

I honestly do not place any emotional value on profiles when I read them. I consider any information to be helpful. If it strikes me as rude, great, then I don't waste my time. Strikes me as vague, again I don't waste my time.

Remember profiles aren't written for you or I or any other individual. They are written to give information and maybe create an image. You don't like the information or the image? Don't waste your time on that person then and be happy they had that information available for you so you didn't contact them further.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to redsky)

Post #: 16

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 7:40:26 AM

WhiplashSmile

Posts: 1472
Joined: 6/8/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheSensualist

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiplashSmile
When I read a profile, I try to respond in an appropriate manner. There have
been a few cases where I was responding to a Use me, abuse me, hurt me
extreme profile, that I myself kicked the doors wide open and typed out things
as if it were from a scripted scene play. I figured we could get down to basic
human communication later. I was not trying to be rude about it, just give an
honest response or reply to the profile.

I don't generally reply to those kinds of profiles myself as I have a sneaking suspicion that most are written by guys looking for email excitement. I don't know, they just don't "feel" like they're written by a woman, if you know what I mean. Statistically some obviously are but I suspect most of them aren't.

The other thing I wonder if these are professional Erotic story writers trolling/looking for new ideas. LOL

(in reply to TheSensualist)

Post #: 17

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 7:52:28 AM

dawntreader

Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiplashSmile

Perhaps a few that recieved some of the scripted Porn intentions of use will read this, and will be shocked..

Hmmm... still waiting for that message in my c-mail! LOL!!

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to WhiplashSmile)

Post #: 18

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 8:02:21 AM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

Some people are frustrated. Some people simply know what they want. Some people just simply have an aggressive personality. If these things bother you, they're most likely not a match for you. All you have to do is move on.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to redsky)

Post #: 19

RE: profiles.... - 3/28/2007 8:05:46 AM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: redsky

hello A/all, i am just wondering.... do some profiles on here seem to be a little 'aggressive'? & i dont just mean the Dom/Dommes....a few submissive profiles i have seen on here are actually quite outrageous & forthcoming about what they WANT.

Umm, not to be rude, but why the hell shouldn't they? Dominants aren't mind-readers and if you are only interested in being with an owner who will love you/won't make you have sex with other women/likes chocolate cake/whatever, then why shouldn't you say that? In fact, not saying that is a waste of everybody's time because you could spend a lot of time talking to someone and then realize they are completely unsuitable because they hate anal and you are all about the back passage.

quote:

im just thinking, how is anyone supposed to feel comfortable messaging someone else if their profile starts off with 'DONT WASTE MY TIME'

in my opinion some profiles are just down right mean & sour, before i met Master Jake i used to be afraid to contact some Doms incase they thought me unreal or fake. i know there are fakers on here, we all know that, but by ranting about what or who you demand or do NOT want to message you, doesnt that kinda make you unwilling to give everyone a chance?
it may just be me......
thanks for reading this...

As a single woman, I was quite honest about the fact that I wasn't willing to give everyone a chance. I wasn't interested in everyone. I was interested in dominant people (male or female though I tend towards male), who want monogamous relationships but enjoy play parties as long as there is no sex. If you don't understand the gamer high or the gamer zone, please don't waste my time because we won't work out.

It's just the weeding out process. *shrugs* Besides, if someone is put off my snarky, smartass attitude on my profile then they couldn't handle actually being with me.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to redsky)

Post #: 20

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