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most important virtues - 3/31/2007 6:57:22 AM

myobedience

Posts: 472
Joined: 1/28/2007
Status: offline

Good morning ladies and gents of the submissive persausion,

I really do not want bottoms to respond.... they are about scene or play in public or private .... this is for submissives/slaves whose motivation is truly submission to a Dom/me or even Poly group.

There are virtues that people describe in regards to D/s, M/s, BDSM. Which ones are the most important to you and why?
safe
sane
consensual
honest
loyal
trustworthy
faithful
obedient
open
responsible
strength
honor
I did not exhaust the list....

How do you practice your virtue?
Do you demand the same of your Dom if in a relationship?
If not in relationship, what quality/virtue do you look for first?
How do you test it in another?

Thanks for your input.

_____________________________

With grace and gratitude, I am owned.
A Man who always seeks to be the best He can be for you is the only Man truly worthy of being called Master.

Post #: 1

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 6:58:46 AM

Aileen68

Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline

evilness.

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 2

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 7:38:21 AM

OnlyHis

Posts: 137
Joined: 2/25/2004
Status: offline

I have been owned by Master for over 5 years and i have learned a lot about myself in that time with his guidance and my own willingness to be all i can be.
There are many virtues i think are important in my M/s relationship with Master, but none more important than the others.
Obedience
trustworthy
honest
faithful and loyal
inner strength
patience
humility
respect
honor
I attempt to practice these in all aspects of my everyday life and yes sometimes i fail but learn from those failures.
I don't demand the same from Master but if he did not have these characteristics (virtues) we would not of gotten as far as we have today .
Great question .

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 3

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 7:44:50 AM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

quote:

I really do not want bottoms to respond.... they are about scene or play in public or private .... this is for submissives/slaves whose motivation is truly submission to a Dom/me or even Poly group.

I do not know why it was necessary to add this, and personally I believe that all these characteristics are equally valuable to people everywhere depending on their situation.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 4

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 8:01:28 AM

sweetnurseBBW

Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

I really do not want bottoms to respond.... they are about scene or play in public or private .... this is for submissives/slaves whose motivation is truly submission to a Dom/me or even Poly group.

I do not know why it was necessary to add this, and personally I believe that all these characteristics are equally valuable to people everywhere depending on their situation.

I agree. Being a bottom doesn't make someone less worthy of these characteristics. It is just want works for them. All these characteristics apply to bottoms as well as anyone else involved in the lifestyle.

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to juliaoceania)

Post #: 5

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 8:16:25 AM

velvetears

Posts: 2933
Joined: 6/19/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: myobedience

How do you practice your virtue?

i just accept that i am human and will make errors in judgement from time to time. i do the best i can to be "all those things" (virtues) and they are good ideals to strive for.

Do you demand the same of your Dom if in a relationship?

How can you demand someone else to have any of these virtues? They either do or they don't. Only thing you can do here is spend time with them so you can truly see and experience the nature of their character. It's easy to pretend for a while, but over time someone's true nature will surface. You need to choose someone with as many virtues you value as possible.

If not in relationship, what quality/virtue do you look for first?

Integrity - it sort of covers a lot of the others

How do you test it in another?

Time

Thanks for your input.

_____________________________

Religion is for people who are scared of hell, Spirituality is for people who have been there

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 6

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 8:55:09 AM

stockingluvr54

Posts: 673
Joined: 6/22/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetnurseBBW

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

I really do not want bottoms to respond.... they are about scene or play in public or private .... this is for submissives/slaves whose motivation is truly submission to a Dom/me or even Poly group.

I do not know why it was necessary to add this, and personally I believe that all these characteristics are equally valuable to people everywhere depending on their situation.

I agree. Being a bottom doesn't make someone less worthy of these characteristics. It is just want works for them. All these characteristics apply to bottoms as well as anyone else involved in the lifestyle.

Thankyou very much.........

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)

Post #: 7

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 9:00:52 AM

Obsidiansnamaste

Posts: 266
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: myobedience

There are virtues that people describe in regards to D/s, M/s, BDSM. Which ones are the most important to you and why?
safe
sane
consensual
honest
loyal
trustworthy
faithful
obedient
open
responsible
strength
honor
I did not exhaust the list....

How do you practice your virtue?
Do you demand the same of your Dom if in a relationship?
If not in relationship, what quality/virtue do you look for first?
How do you test it in another?

Thanks for your input.

For a slave:
honesty, obedient, trustworthy, loyalty, devotion, transparent, vulnerable, honor

For a Master:
Honesty, responsible, trustworthy, strength, honor, integrity

How do you practice your virtue?

These are part of my being who i am, i "practice" by being true to self, being a Seeker and always trying to grow.

Do you demand the same of your Dom if in a relationship?

i don't demand anything from Master. He *IS* my Master because He does posess a all of the virtues i have listed. Because these are part of HIM, i don't feel any need to make demands or to attempt to make sure that He keeps to His inner compass. i believe it is not my place to oversee Him.

How do you test it in another?

i observe them. i get to know the person, on ALL levels.

_____________________________

Always in His service,

~Master Obsidians namaste
http://houseobsidian.wordpress.com
http://his-namaste.livejournal.com

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 8

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 9:10:47 AM

viperess

Posts: 290
Joined: 11/6/2006
Status: offline

Greetings,
Obsidiansnamaste said a mouth full there. she said it much better than i could have and i agree with it 100%

_____________________________

viperess slave of BlackTarnHeart
heart and chain sister to velvetvixen68

(in reply to Obsidiansnamaste)

Post #: 9

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 9:15:35 AM

agirl

Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

I don't possess any virtue that I could claim as * something that I am*. I'm sometimes all of those things and sometimes I'm not. Everyone that I have ever known has possessed them to *some* degree at *some* time, but not all the time.

Understanding, perserverance, consistancy and fairness, are probably the *virtues* that have made the biggest impact on me and have benefitted me the most in regards to M. He would probably have a different list, regarding me, to do his job well. He requires are far greater degree of openess from me, for instance.

agirl

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 10

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 10:04:41 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

I agree with Julia- your comment was unnecessary and shows a limited understanding of the variety of relationships and personalities which exist. You DO know that a person can be both a slave AND a bottom, yes?

My important characteristics:
awareness and appreciation of self
awareness and appreciation of social environment
humor which matches my own style of sarcasm, irony, wit, sardonicism and self-degradation
Good sense of style
Enjoys getting out of the house

http://www.collarchat.com/m_158262/mpage_1/key_dominant%252Ccharacteristics/tm.htm#158262
what is dominance?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_81695/mpage_1/key_dom%252Ctraits/tm.htm#81695
What are the signs/traits of a good dom?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_176730/mpage_1/key_dom%252Ctraits/tm.htm#176730
"real doms"

http://www.collarchat.com/m_223089/mpage_1/key_dom%252Ctraits/tm.htm#223089
a submissives perspective

http://www.collarchat.com/m_257771/mpage_1/key_dom%252Ctraits/tm.htm#257771
what I look for in a good owner

http://www.collarchat.com/m_284665/mpage_1/key_dom%252Ctraits/tm.htm#284665
top ten characteristics I want in a dom?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_339652/mpage_1/key_dom%252Ctraits/tm.htm#339652
nature of dominance

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 11

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 10:32:51 AM

jauntyone

Posts: 543
Joined: 2/27/2007
From: Anchorage Alaska
Status: offline

Greetings

Master demands two things from me

absolute obedience and beauty from the inside out

Everything else is subject to his own whims

I wish you well

melissa

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 12

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 10:47:04 AM

IrishMist

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

I don't possess any virtue that I could claim as * something that I am*. I'm sometimes all of those things and sometimes I'm not. Everyone that I have ever known has possessed them to *some* degree at *some* time, but not all the time.

I would agree with this, but also with what LA, and Julia said in regards to bottoms.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to agirl)

Post #: 13

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 11:18:10 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

trust - is very important for our relationship because without it, our D/s dynamic is doomed to fail. i think i demanded that more from Daddy than He did from me since He knows i don't trust or allow many into my inner circle.

after trust, comes respect (as a person first then as in our roles), honsesty, love, cherish, integrity, safe, independent, self-motivated, confident, successful, spiritual and open.

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 14

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 11:25:37 AM

spanklette

Posts: 882
Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline

There are a litany of responses to this question that come to mind, but the one at the forefront is honesty. I don't demand it, how could I? My trust doesn't come very easily, it is earned...after that...intelligence, sense of humor, confidence, and the ability to compromise.

It is impossible for me to list every single virtue and the order in which I find them important. We just click or we don't.

_____________________________

~spanklette~

"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 15

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 5:18:06 PM

behindmirrors

Posts: 340
Joined: 8/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: myobedience

There are virtues that people describe in regards to D/s, M/s, BDSM. Which ones are the most important to you and why?
safe
sane
consensual
honest
loyal
trustworthy
faithful
obedient
open
responsible
strength
honor
I did not exhaust the list....

I do not limit the virtues I seek in another (and this goes for more than just my Dom, but is across the board for those I am close to in any relationship) or myself to just those related to BDSM. I do look for the same things in my Dom, however. For me, personally, I see my list of virtues as follows (in no particular order):
- Rational (sane would fall under this)
- Proud (having self-esteem)
- Selfish (serving the self above others, only serving in a beneficial way to the self)
- Thoughtful
- Honorable
- Loyal (to self, to those associated with them)
- Willing (open-minded)
- Resilient
- Independent
- Passionate (full of life)
- Curious (seeks knowledge for the betterment of self and for enjoyment)
- Creative
- Responsible
- Just (sense of justice morally)
- Integrity (to self, to moral code/values)
- Productiveness (seeks to further themselves in life)

I am obedient, though independent. I do not see myself, however, as an extension of my Dominant, but as a person unto myself and capable as such. I do agree that obedience is important, though perhaps in a different way.

quote:

How do you practice your virtue?

Through the way in which I live all of my life, as best as I am able. I practice it enthusiastically, and though I make errors, I strive to learn from them. I don't think there is a problem with making mistakes, unless it is knowingly and willingly doing so.

quote:

Do you demand the same of your Dom if in a relationship?

I demand the same out of all those with whom I associate on any close or personal level.

quote:

How do you test it in another?

I need not test- I observe. Then, I make a rational judgement.

behindmirrors.

(edited for inclusion)

< Message edited by behindmirrors -- 3/31/2007 5:19:25 PM >

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 16

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 7:30:00 PM

myobedience

Posts: 472
Joined: 1/28/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: stockingluvr54

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetnurseBBW

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

I really do not want bottoms to respond.... they are about scene or play in public or private .... this is for submissives/slaves whose motivation is truly submission to a Dom/me or even Poly group.

I do not know why it was necessary to add this, and personally I believe that all these characteristics are equally valuable to people everywhere depending on their situation.

I agree. Being a bottom doesn't make someone less worthy of these characteristics. It is just want works for them. All these characteristics apply to bottoms as well as anyone else involved in the lifestyle.

Thankyou very much.........

*rolls eyes....

all I was doing was narrowing the scope of my inquiry.

_____________________________

With grace and gratitude, I am owned.
A Man who always seeks to be the best He can be for you is the only Man truly worthy of being called Master.

(in reply to stockingluvr54)

Post #: 17

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 7:32:12 PM

Caitriona

Posts: 327
Joined: 8/28/2006
Status: offline

I wrote an essay on what I considered my "submissive virtues." If you're interested it can be found on my blog at ownedkitten.blogspot.com

Many of those listed I would seek in my Dominant partner...as I believe they are universal for me.

_____________________________

Property of Shadowraven
Serving alongside ciarra

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 18

RE: most important virtues - 3/31/2007 8:30:05 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: myobedience

I really do not want bottoms to respond.... they are about scene or play in public or private .... this is for submissives/slaves whose motivation is truly submission to a Dom/me or even Poly group.

.......

I did not exhaust the list....

mmmmmm Open-Mindedness........

but then considering your above comment... maybe you left this out on purpose

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 19

RE: most important virtues - 4/1/2007 4:57:38 AM

eyesopened

Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline

To me the only word i need to concentrait on is Integrity. This word encompasses honesty, trustworthiness, it means that although i will make mistakes i remain true to myself and by extension true to my Master. When one has integrity it means they will do what they say and follow through with promises, they will not put on pretenses, they will represent themselves with honor, they will respect others, they will maintain their value system regardless of circumstances.

_____________________________

Proudly owned by InkedMaster. He is the one i obey, serve, honor and love.

No one is honored for what they've received. Honor is the reward for what has been given.

(in reply to myobedience)

Post #: 20

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