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littlesarbonn -> RE: Why is it so hard to find a male slave? (4/1/2007 12:12:38 AM)
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Judging from this thread, you don't take to advice or criticism well, but I'll throw out my thought anyway, because it's not really a criticism, but a case as to why someone like me would probably not have responded to someone like you.
I consider myself a very strong slave-minded submissive. I rarely try to contact someone who puts forth a profile that is straight out negative. You know the kind, the ones that complain in their profile about what they don't want to see or hear from. It may help to thin the herd, but it also thins out a lot of other people as well. I spent a lot of time listening to dominant women complaining about submissive male profiles, so I spent a GREAT deal of time putting together a profile that I hoped would help someone find me and not have to search much more to figure me out. When someone posts a two line profile and then complains that finding someone real is so hard, it leaves one wondering what results were actually expected. You might attract people who are throwing out the proverbial net in hopes of catching anyone who is advertising, but the quality submissives of whom you are seeking are not going to be searching in such a manner. Thus, it will be practically impossible to connect with people who ignore someone's profile.
I personally know of a number of very good, solid slave-minded submissives who are on the boards here, but they are pretty much under the radar because of a number of reasons. Instead, what you are competing for are the loud, obnoxious ones who try to attract any woman who seems like she might be looking. As one of this type, I'll be honest; I rarely contact anyone unless I've been speaking to her on the message boards for a while, convinced that she's intelligent and worthy of continuing conversation.
There are a number of wonderful women who post here who are extremely attractive just for the reason that they put forth great conversations. Some of them I'd love to meet; others have never been interested in me since day one, so I'm at least fortunate enough to be able to communicate with them on the boards. But that's one of those things that takes a long time to cultivate, and someone coming along, having put forth a profile and a few random contacts with people who didn't work out, just doesn't seem like someone who really has a lot of room to complain about not being able to find someone. We've all had our troubles finding someone here (well, some more than others), but complaining about it usually leads nowhere but to more complaints.
I learned a long time ago that if you don't like the pool of people of whom you have been seeking, perhaps you should either try a different tactic, which involves different people, or cast a net in a different pool of water than the one in which you have been seeking. This doesn't mean having to go elsewhere than collarme, because there are a lot of different communities here on collarme alone. You just have to be willing to put forth the work to find them.
I'll also let you in on a little secret: A lot of sincere male slaves don't even contact people; they get contacted in a lot of cases. I know that happens for me, as I vowed to not seek out anyone on the boards or through personal messages. And it's worked just fine that way. Someone once told me that if I didn't do the first contact than I would never end up as her property because she ONLY responded to those who contacted her first. She made my point for me; no, I wouldn't be hers, because I would never belong to someone who didn't feel I was worth the pursuit in the first place. Doesn't work for everyone, but more and more submissives I talk to these days are of a similar mind, even if they don't share it out loud on the boards.
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