red pill or blue pill...

red pill or blue pill... (Full Version)

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crouchingtigress -> red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 1:09:34 PM)
this week i was thinking about this very thing that juliet just said in her post quote: And one further thing. I think if you spent a whole lot of time around people who live this life, you'd find a large number of us who at one time or another have wished we never found out about this lifestyle. There are a large number of us who, while we love our lives, recognize that life might have been easier if we'd never been graced with the need for dominance or submissiveness or pain or intensity or whatever you want to call it. Here we are, and here we'll stay, but this life absolutely exacts a cost. please be sure you're ready to pay it before embarking on something that you really can't go back from. it reminds me of the scene in the matrix where cypher says: quote: I know what you're thinking, 'cause right now I'm thinking the same thing. Actually, I've been thinking it ever since I got here: Why oh why didn't I take the BLUE pill? (snip) buckle your seatbelt, Dorothy, 'cause Kansas is going bye-bye. ill be honest, sometimes i wish i never took the red pill....not always, not even most of the time...but every now and then.

juliaoceania -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 1:14:02 PM)
When looking for a partner I often felt that way, because it narrows the field quite a bit to limit oneself to dominant men.

julietsierra -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 1:18:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress ill be honest, sometimes i wish i never took the red pill....not always, not even most of the time...but every now and then. I've thought that as well. And used exactly that example! The thing is, even if you choose to take the blue pill later, you never really forget what you experienced with the red pill... lol...why do I feel like breaking out into lyrics from Hotel California? "You can check out but you can never leave." juliet

missturbation -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 1:23:46 PM)
Metaphorically speaking i didn't take the red pill for a long time although i recognised the need for it in me. There may be times i wish i had never taken it, but i have to say those times are far less often and far easier to deal with than the thoughts, emotions, feelings of lacking something were before i did.

julietsierra -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 1:27:20 PM)
There is that too. The times the misplaced desire for the blue pill happen most often to me during times of extreme frustration or lol...generally when the pms is overwhelming (which does happen more often as I'm getting older unfortunately) juliet

ownedgirlie -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 1:28:05 PM)
This wasn't something I recall actually choosing. I simply am this way. I remember for a long time wishing I wasn't this way, and that life would have been a hell of a lot easier if I was just "normal" (as if there is such thing). I tried choosing the other direction and denying this part of myself. I was miserable. I would change none of it now...none of it!! [:)]

juliaoceania -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 1:32:37 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie This wasn't something I recall actually choosing. I simply am this way. I remember for a long time wishing I wasn't this way, and that life would have been a hell of a lot easier if I was just "normal" (as if there is such thing). I tried choosing the other direction and denying this part of myself. I was miserable. I would change none of it now...none of it!! [:)] If the opportunity to learn about this never came to you then there would have been no choice really, would there have been? In other words, if you could take back learning about WIITWD, would you? I see my inner being different than pursuing a relationship with Ds overtones.

GeekyGirl -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 1:45:39 PM)
What a great topic! I know that there are many times that I wish I had never gone down this road...I'm such a weirdo that my "field" is narrowed considerably before you ever even get to Lifestyle related issues. Add my D/s preferences to everything else and my potential partners are a very small number of people. I have often thought how much easier it would be for me to find a partner had I never found this lifestyle...but then again, my D/s relationships have been some of the richest of my life and I find any other kind of relationship to feel "watered down" . If I could go back and do it again without ever feeling the need for a D/s relationship, I would probably take that path. This one has just been extremely difficult for me. Hindsight's 20/20 though and I don't feel I could ever change now.

ownedgirlie -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 1:55:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: juliaoceania If the opportunity to learn about this never came to you then there would have been no choice really, would there have been? In other words, if you could take back learning about WIITWD, would you? I see my inner being different than pursuing a relationship with Ds overtones. There never was a choice, because I was already naturally submitting in my relationships, yearning to have what I thought were "abnormal" desires met. Before knowing there were actually "normal" people who did this, I thought I was crazy. But my earliest memories, long before dating was even in my realm of thinking, bring me to a place where my thoughts were subservient to men, and my fantasies were of being used by them. Throughout my life I wanted to change that about me, prior to knowing this was an actual way of living that people actually did. Even after knowing there was a word for this and that I wasn't mentally ill, I wished I was not submissive. The road was too hard for me at the time. It's not that I didn't want to know about D/s, M/s, BDSM, LMNOP, I didn't want to HAVE to know about it. I wished I were different. I no longer think that way. I embrace who and what I am, and I love submitting to my Master. This way of life for me comes with some challenges, but I would not change how fulfilled I am or the love I now know for a minute. It was a painful road for me to get here, and many times I did not want to be on it. But now that I'm here, I'd take it all over again.

julietsierra -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 2:00:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie Even after knowing there was a word for this and that I wasn't mentally ill, I wished I was not submissive. The road was too hard for me at the time. It's not that I didn't want to know about D/s, M/s, BDSM, LMNOP, I didn't want to HAVE to know about it. I wished I were different. I no longer think that way. I embrace who and what I am, and I love submitting to my Master. This way of life for me comes with some challenges, but I would not change how fulfilled I am or the love I now know for a minute. It was a painful road for me to get here, and many times I did not want to be on it. But now that I'm here, I'd take it all over again. The point is, if whether it was intrinsic to your nature or not (and it was to my nature as well), there were still times you wished you could have taken the blue pill. There were times you even tried to take the blue pill - it just never quite worked the way the blue pill was supposed to work. juliet

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 2:02:57 PM)
Being true to yourself is pretty much the hardest thing there is to be. But it's the only thing worth being IMO.

ownedgirlie -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 2:03:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: julietsierra The point is, if whether it was intrinsic to your nature or not (and it was to my nature as well), there were still times you wished you could have taken the blue pill. There were times you even tried to take the blue pill - it just never quite worked the way the blue pill was supposed to work. juliet Well now I'm confused as to which pill is which, lol. But yes, you are correct. And now I am glad for where I am, whatever the journey was.

LaTigresse -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 2:06:41 PM)
Sometimes I wish there was a pill for normal, whatever that is. Some sort of satisfaction in a nice normal relationship. I see people that would just be thrilled for a decent straight whitebread relationship. Everything I have had and didn't work for me. I often feel guilty, greedy, unrealistic. I should be thrilled, I should be in 7th heaven, I have it all right at my fingertips. Sooooo, why don't I want it?

MasterFireMaam -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 2:27:51 PM)
I don't regret much in my life. In my belief system, I came here and contracted to have these experiences in order to learn what I needed to learn and to teach what I needed to teach. So, I took the pill long ago...and life is about how well you play the hand that you're dealt. I think I'm doing great! Master Fire

Crush -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 2:32:54 PM)
In the words of that famous sailor: "I yam what I yam" I just wish I knew what I was years before I knew what I was, though going through those years made me more what I am today. right?

SlaveBlutarsky -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 2:38:10 PM)
While I agree for the most part with the OP, I think that when we do in fact find what we are looking for, in most cases it's a lot more fullfilling and intense than the the normal relationship.

julietsierra -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 2:40:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SlaveBlutarsky While I agree for the most part with the OP, I think that when we do in fact find what we are looking for, in most cases it's a lot more fullfilling and intense than the the normal relationship. Well, I'd say that any time someone finds what they're looking for - regardless what it is - even if it's a vanilla relationship, it's far more fulfilling and intense than any other relationship we've ever had. That's not indicative of only bdsm relationships. It's part of finding the right person whoever and whatever that right person is. juliet

BRNaughtyAngel -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 2:45:23 PM)
I was confused by and afraid of the "red pill" for most of my adult life. So I lived a life that was ruled by fear and confusion. Even though it's only been about a year and half since I embraced the journey that lead me to "take the red pill", there are still days I have my doubts about going there. But then I realize that I have to be true to myself if I'm ever going to find that happiness and fulfillment that has eluded me all these years. Of course, now that I'm back in the "seeking" mode, and being inundated with those emails that make you do this [sm=rolleyes.gif] all day, I think I'm gonna need a different kinda pill. More like a bottle of aspirin or extra strength excedrin! [&:]

crouchingtigress -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 2:49:55 PM)
wow you have really helped me see something...it was pretty obvious and i am sure it is not a shock to any one...but for years folks have been saying the they feel bdsm relationships are more fufilling the vanilla....well of course that are!!! silly me...if you are wired the way we are and you are in a vanillia there is no way it can be as fufilling

HisProperty4Life -> RE: red pill or blue pill... (4/8/2007 2:51:09 PM)
why can't you take both red and blue? i vote for a purple pill

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