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Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 1:11:48 PM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		This is for all to answer. Now i know some things Masters/Doms do bother us(subs) a little sometimes.

What i would like to know what is a total deal breaker for you?(Besides lying about being married)

Matt's littleone
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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 1:18:23 PM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline 		Lack of honesty.

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If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 1:20:15 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		http://www.collarchat.com/m_526440/mpage_1/key_breaker/tm.htm#526448
Deal Breakers

http://www.collarchat.com/m_154756/mpage_1/key_deal%252Cbreakers/tm.htm#154756
deal breakers (2)

Reposted:
My deal breakers are generally the same for all relationships, but with a few specific differences.

Deal breakers tend to be the same as hard limits (in fact I'd consider using them as synonyms) though "deal breakers" can be more personality conflicts or personal issues that have nothing to do with any action or reaction on the d-side of the slash. For example "he never brushes his teeth, that's a deal breaker" doesn't mean that you have some limit on teeth brushing, simply that as a compatibility issue for forming a relationship with someone, it's not what you consider a good thing.

But the two are so synonymous I don't think it would be wrong to use them the same way for the most part.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to littleone35)
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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 1:22:24 PM   
ayasha


Posts: 149
Joined: 12/10/2005
Status: offline 		Lying in general, not just about being married. 

(in reply to missturbation)
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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 1:24:02 PM   
completenz


Posts: 315
Joined: 1/10/2007
Status: offline 		hi
ditto from both of us
C & c

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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 1:31:30 PM   
damia


Posts: 190
Joined: 10/26/2006
Status: offline 		Coming directly from my 'playlist' which is basically a contract in that it is negotiated over time, and that it discusses everything I really LOVE, my fetishes, and my deal breakers, which read:

Deal Breakers   Deal breakers are things that could render a contract null and void or end a non-contracted relationship. Second chances happen, depending on the reasons for the actions.  

Malicious Conduct: Behaviours or actions done solely to hurt another, especially me, are deal breakers. Being cruel just for the sake of being cruel is not acceptable. There’s a difference between a humourous jab or a pratical joke and something planned just for the sake of doing harm. (Malicious conduct includes breaking a hard limit for the purpose of hurting me).

Lying: A blatant lie told for cruel intent is a deal breaker. Lying in such a manner that affects me in a negative way is a deal breaker. I won’t lie to you, and I expect you to extend the same courtesy to me.

< Message edited by damia -- 4/12/2007 1:32:02 PM >

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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 1:52:22 PM   
StellaByStarlite


Posts: 790
Joined: 2/10/2007
Status: offline 		Deal breakers as in... something that would stop me from getting involved with a person?

Or deal breakers as in.. what it would take for me to end the relationship?

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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 2:06:26 PM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline 		The following is a deal-breaker for me: Inhernet unfairness as far as what one requires of one's partner vs. oneself. For istance, my ex-Dom was Poly and was seeing others when we were together. I had no problem with this.

What I had a problem with, was that he said he didn't mind if I was actively Poly as well - but he really did mind. And he wouldn't allow it, actually. I know the Dominant is dominant, etc., but I just find that kind of reasoning to be hard to stomach, when taken to an extreme.

- Susan  

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 4/12/2007 2:07:47 PM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 2:21:56 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		my deal breaker with Daddy (besides lying and lack of committment) would be wanting to move our D/s relationship from monogamous to poly.

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 2:39:48 PM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		Deal breakers as in what would cause you to end  a Relationship after you  are already involved.

Matt's littleone

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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 2:58:21 PM   
jauntyone


Posts: 543
Joined: 2/27/2007
From: Anchorage Alaska
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littleone35

Deal breakers as in what would cause you to end  a Relationship after you  are already involved.

Matt's littleone

Greetings
 
Release from Master would end our relationship.
 
Death would end our relationship.
 
Other than those two; there is nothing that would entice me to end the relationship that I have with Master.
 
I wish you well
 
melissa

(in reply to littleone35)
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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 3:56:14 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		that is a deal breaker for me. so i did answer your query correctly.

i'm not interested in a poly relationship and if Daddy (He wouldn't but speaking hypothetically here) was to suggest that we move into a poly dynamic without discussing my concerns and feelings - i would uncollar myself walking away forever. 

it may sound childish to you however this is what happened with my last "Master". he wanted a poly ...actually a stable of women (he was  into sales so he travelled a lot) and felt i should enjoy it even though i said i wasn't interested in becoming #  whatever in his sexual barn. so i walked away.

that's my deal breaker




_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to littleone35)
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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 4:29:17 PM   
slaveish


Posts: 1086
Joined: 2/19/2007
Status: offline 		Intentional emotional or physical abuse (and I don't mean the sort of mind fucks / physical punishments he uses to correct my behavior). In short, if he flipped his wig one day and turned into a sociopath, it would end it.

Lying is another big thing. If a man is not man enough to say "This is how things are so you deal with it or leave" then he is not man enough to Master me. If he has to lie, he is letting the potential consequences of my potential actions control him into lying to me, which essentially puts me in a Dominant position.

_____________________________

You only lose what you cling to. ~~Gautama Sidharta

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~~Mother Teresa

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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 4:53:55 PM   
Quivver


Posts: 1953
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline 		Considering topic's have been covered, and limits or the extent of pushing of them stated and agreed to there is one HUGE deal breaker for me and that's action.  All too often people talk, sell themselves, promise and have good intentions.  But after a while, at some point talk has to turn to action or it's all a mute point.




_____________________________

The problem with communication ... is the illusion that it has been accomplished. ~George Bernard Shaw

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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 4:54:54 PM   
FelinePersuasion


Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline 		Deal breakers would be cheating on me serious lies done wityh intent to hide something he knows would get his hide in a sling. Telling me he couldn't come because he had to do something really important, and deciding to goof off.

_____________________________

Most of the time if it looks like BS, smells like BS, you probably should not t taste it to see if, in fact, it is BS.


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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 4:59:38 PM   
lockedaway


Posts: 1720
Joined: 3/15/2007
Status: offline 		Cheating (as opposed to polyamory) is a big deal breaker.  Lieing in general pretty much will destroy the relationship.  Probably anything other than duplicity can be overcome. 

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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 5:03:12 PM   
gypsygrl


Posts: 1471
Joined: 10/8/2005
From: new york state
Status: offline 		Things that would make me end a relationship?

In the past, I've ended relationships because of ceaseless button pushing and mind screws without consent, passive aggressive behavior, inconsistency between stated intentions and practice, defensive and evasive communication styles, unpredictability, and lack of respect.  They're basically things that make me really unhappy.


_____________________________

“To be happy is to be able to become aware of oneself without fright.” ~Walter Benjamin


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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 5:23:27 PM   
hereyesruponyou


Posts: 770
Joined: 1/22/2007
Status: offline 		Lying, one big one or a constant little ones rank the same to me. Not being trustworthy or following through on things you promise. I am big on don't promise anything you do not KNOW you will do. For me smoking or excessive alcohol/drug use. Excessive to me is anything that controls your life and i do NOT play with people who are drunk or high, period.

_____________________________

Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be


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RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 6:18:18 PM   
minnetar


Posts: 1272
Joined: 4/11/2007
Status: offline 		lies in general and not honoring the safeword.

minnetar

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Deal Breakers - 4/12/2007 6:35:38 PM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littleone35

This is for all to answer. Now i know some things Masters/Doms do bother us(subs) a little sometimes.

What i would like to know what is a total deal breaker for you?(Besides lying about being married)

Matt's littleone


being released.  TOTAL deal-breaker.

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 20
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