Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Damaged goods


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> Damaged goods Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 7:31:57 AM   
madcatlady


Posts: 11
Joined: 3/26/2007
Status: offline 		 Today my current Master asked me to take a pic of 'His cunt'.....so i did..........and i was not happy with the results.........i have quite a few scars from two previous Doms/Masters, from various type of play, needles, burns etc..........the pics made me feel ugly and 'damaged'..........my current Master has never made comment and calls me His 'pretty fucktoy'.......but i am wondering if other Doms/Masters have a problem with 'damaged goods'...........those subs/bottoms/masochists who have had experience (ive been doing this 10 years) and have the proof of that experience on their bodies?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 7:45:31 AM   
MrDiscipline44


Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline 		Your Master has no problem with your scars. Why should you?

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to madcatlady)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 8:12:43 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MrDiscipline44

Your Master has no problem with your scars. Why should you?

I have to agree with this here. It's obvious from what you wrote that your owner is not unhappy with his property and that your scars don't bother him in any way. Instead of focusing on what they make YOU feel, focus instead on knowing that he finds you beautiful.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to MrDiscipline44)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 8:23:45 AM   
madcatlady


Posts: 11
Joined: 3/26/2007
Status: offline 		my question was/is if other Doms/Masters/Mistresses etc would have a problem with scars on a sub/bottom etc from previous play...............would they see them as damaged goods or have a different opinion?

(i was explaining how i came to think about the question, not whinging about my scars, thats my issue )

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 8:57:07 AM   
Satyr6406


Posts: 820
Joined: 3/27/2006
From: New Brunswick, N.J.
Status: offline 		If you're asking anyone's opinion, I'll toss mine in.
 
I'm a non-sadistic, non-BDSM, extreme D/s Daddy Dom. Hurting another human being is NOT want I want to do and another human being's pain does NOT serve me.
 
Having said that; I can and do engage (occasionally) in some light BDSM play but, I have NEVER scarred a young lady and, to be quite honest, while I wouldn't label someone ("damaged goods") as that is judging them, I would probably assume that, eventually, a submissive with those kinds of scars would become "bored" with my "almost 'nilla" lifestyle (as far as BDSM sadists and masochists are concerned).
 
 
 
 
 
Peace and comfort,
 
 
 
 
 
Michael

_____________________________

Peace and comfort,


Michael

Former Vice-President Gore didn't invent the internet but, he DID make up global warming!

(in reply to madcatlady)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 8:57:33 AM   
nawashi2


Posts: 4
Joined: 4/29/2007
Status: offline 		No I have never had a problem with what you call damaged goods.

(in reply to madcatlady)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 9:00:47 AM   
HutchGarahl


Posts: 562
Joined: 1/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: madcatlady

Today my current Master asked me to take a pic of 'His cunt'.....so i did..........and i was not happy with the results.........i have quite a few scars from two previous Doms/Masters, from various type of play, needles, burns etc..........the pics made me feel ugly and 'damaged'..........my current Master has never made comment and calls me His 'pretty fucktoy'.......but i am wondering if other Doms/Masters have a problem with 'damaged goods'...........those subs/bottoms/masochists who have had experience (ive been doing this 10 years) and have the proof of that experience on their bodies?


No, I wouldn't have a problem with "damaged goods" as you call it. It's something that happened previous to me, why should I? As long as it doesn't interfere in us...and if it does, I can usually find a way to help resolve the issue.

(in reply to madcatlady)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 9:14:18 AM   
ErusUxor


Posts: 44
Joined: 4/22/2007
Status: offline 		What a terrible feeling to have about yourself! I empathize but from a slightly differnt angle. I do not have scars from play, for I am not into heavy pain play, but I drag alot of emotional baggage around from past relationships that makes me feel as if I May never be "good" enough for Master. He does not see this in me and says I am perfect for him,,, its my own mental crap. Life produces scars both visible and invisible...if he finds you pleasing remeber that he is accepting the real human being you are... experiences included. Try and see yourself in his eyes....you might be overwhelmed by the beauty.

_____________________________




When they said "penny for your thoughts" ...I had to try and figure out how to make change.

(in reply to HutchGarahl)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 9:25:37 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Some do.  Most don't.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to ErusUxor)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 9:28:20 AM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: madcatlady

.......but i am wondering if other Doms/Masters have a problem with 'damaged goods'...........those subs/bottoms/masochists who have had experience (ive been doing this 10 years) and have the proof of that experience on their bodies?

Depends on the level of damage.  I don't care for marking a submissive, so heavy scarring would be unattractive to me.  I feel much the same about tattoos (something else I generally don't find attractive), one or two tasteful tattoos probably won't present a problem, a body covered in them would.  Its a matter of personal taste, I would imagine that just as some (like myself) don't care for scars or other "damage", there are probably others who would find it appealing.  You get all kinds. 

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to madcatlady)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 10:19:53 AM   
m0rgan


Posts: 403
Joined: 3/19/2007
Status: offline 		nope, pretty on the inside matters more! that applies to all.

_____________________________


download this, the girls voice will make you damp--->

http://www.saab.com/main/GLOBAL/en/download_release_me.shtml


a loaf of bread, a jug of wine and thou,
beside me, in the wilderness, were paradise enough!

(in reply to Padriag)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 11:18:07 AM   
myobedience


Posts: 472
Joined: 1/28/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: madcatlady

Today my current Master asked me to take a pic of 'His cunt'.....so i did..........and i was not happy with the results.........i have quite a few scars from two previous Doms/Masters, from various type of play, needles, burns etc..........the pics made me feel ugly and 'damaged'..........my current Master has never made comment and calls me His 'pretty fucktoy'.......but i am wondering if other Doms/Masters have a problem with 'damaged goods'...........those subs/bottoms/masochists who have had experience (ive been doing this 10 years) and have the proof of that experience on their bodies?


I do NOT associate with the types of scars, that is from types of play, and I really do NOT consider myself damaged goods...  I count myself as one who found herself after being abandoned..... 
That being said, I do bear on my right shoulder blade, a tattoo between that former one and myself. 
I dont see it, but my Sir does.  I must ask Him how He feels about it.

_____________________________

With grace and gratitude, I am owned.
A Man who always seeks to be the best He can be for you is the only Man truly worthy of being called Master.

(in reply to madcatlady)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 12:04:49 PM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		Body image being what it is, the scars that look so unsightly to you are probably unnoticable to him. Ask him how often he notices them. In the meantime, assuming he doesn't want you to keep mementos from your exes, try Mederma cream. Good both to prevent scarring and to help fade old ones.

(in reply to myobedience)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 12:48:18 PM   
grlneedstolearn


Posts: 728
Joined: 1/29/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: madcatlady

Today my current Master asked me to take a pic of 'His cunt'.....so i did..........and i was not happy with the results.........i have quite a few scars from two previous Doms/Masters, from various type of play, needles, burns etc..........the pics made me feel ugly and 'damaged'..........my current Master has never made comment and calls me His 'pretty fucktoy'.......but i am wondering if other Doms/Masters have a problem with 'damaged goods'...........those subs/bottoms/masochists who have had experience (ive been doing this 10 years) and have the proof of that experience on their bodies?


i have scars, but not from my previous Dom, and my current Dom doesn't mind at all.

(in reply to madcatlady)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 1:01:31 PM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline 		If they where signs of prior 'abuse' at the hands of a harmful fuckwit then they would probably make Me more angered (At him, not her) whilst I was finding out her history, but day to day, they are not something I tend to notice or focus on. I tend to simply see My beautiful girl in her wonderful entirity.

So no, no problem with what you lable as 'Damaged goods'


_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 1:33:46 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		I wouldn't worry about your appearance, but i would worry more about what he intends to do with the pictures, from someone who had a bad experience with pictures posted on a web site.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to madcatlady)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 2:31:21 PM   
spanklette


Posts: 882
Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline 		Scars are scars...I prefer not to label myself as "damaged goods", but I have scars inside and out. Some heal, some fester, but they exist. I have never been turned down for any of those reasons, however mayber they were too polite to mention anything.
 
At some point, we all become "damaged goods", I would think. And, as for a Dominant accepting a submissive with scars...I think it would depend on the two people involved and the specifics of the scars as well.
 
We can very easily make generalizations about who will accept what until situation becomes personal.

_____________________________

~spanklette~

"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers

(in reply to madcatlady)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 3:19:55 PM   
Raphael


Posts: 263
Joined: 5/10/2005
Status: offline 		Damaged goods? Or extra character? Merely a matter of perspective.

(in reply to spanklette)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 3:45:05 PM   
acquiesce93


Posts: 23
Joined: 8/2/2006
Status: offline 		I have only been with two (male) subs with visible play-scars on their genitals, and I have to say... it turns me WAY the heck on.  I cannot bring myself to permanently alter a person's skin, though. That being said, I have a pretty solid history of dating men with intense body modifications, so genital mods "inflicted" by others were sort of just par for the course.  Though your sir may love enacting playtime fantasies of breaking down a delicate flower, he most likely revels in the fact that you're quite the strong, brave and willing sub he's come to know and lust.

Wear your scars like jewels, dear.

(in reply to Raphael)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Damaged goods - 4/29/2007 4:33:40 PM   
PairOfDimes


Posts: 324
Joined: 7/20/2006
Status: offline 		Scars from play would provoke a minor aesthetic objection in me, because incidental (that is, non-decorative) scars aren't generally something I regard as pretty. (Pretty, deliberate cutting scars are different, and often lovely body mods.) But the context of the accidental scar doesn't really matter--whether your scar was from a kitchen accident or a sensation cutting wouldn't really make a difference to me. And, if it needs to be said, this would not change my mind about whether to play with you, because it's unlikely that a person could reach adulthood and not have any minor injuries that healed with scarring. I prefer to play with and form relationships with people who have enjoyed BDSM before me, and as I like to play with relatively heavy bottoms, some scarring can be part of the "experienced SM bottom" package.

And yes, Mederma works very well. Regularly massaging moisturizer into scarred areas is good, too.

Now, if you had lost sensation in or use of a body part, it might be valid to call yourself "damaged." In that case, I would find you more attractive if you had sensation or use in that part, but I doubt a bit of lameness or numbness would be an absolute disqualifier alone.

I think this is two insecurities put together and multiplied--body image, and the "unspoiled virgin" ideal still prevalent in the raising of daughters. So: it is okay to have scars on your skin--everyone has some irregularities. It is okay, indeed, desirable, to have some experience in your chosen style of sex and relationships.

Monica.

(in reply to madcatlady)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> Damaged goods Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.125