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RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/5/2007 11:59:00 AM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
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You are most welcome, Nikko.  Welcome to the forums. 

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to Nikko1962)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/5/2007 1:17:49 PM   
kajirusilk


Posts: 49
Joined: 11/5/2006
Status: offline
my First Owner would loan me out at times as part of my training.

(in reply to Vendaval)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/5/2007 1:44:32 PM   
SDFemDom4cuck


Posts: 2809
Joined: 5/23/2005
From: P'burgh PA
Status: offline
I have to go with Kat on this one as well.

In regard to training if it was something I wasn't experienced in but had a strong interest in it would be fully dependant on the situation or training that was needed to be developed. I would prefer to be present in order to practice and learn any developing activity A bit of growth and evolution together is a great bonding experience.

As for service I have to consider the actual service required. If it's simply a strong back or specific skill he has that is needed I would be happy to loan him out to another that I trust and know. If it was an opportunity to learn service (say formal service at a dinner and I was a guest as well) I would be fine with loaning him for the occassion as well.

Play would be another matter altogether and dependant on the specific situation and people involved.

In any of the situations I would most certainly sit down and discuss what parameters are to be set and what is acceptable and unacceptable behaviors for all involved both individually and together.

I have actually loaned my previous boy out to someone he butted heads with but happened to be a very close friend of mine. I trusted Her and I trusted him. The interactions between the two when the three of us were together were unacceptable for me. A case of them both rubbing one another the wrong way. I wanted the three of us to be able to spend time together without that dynamic of head butting or resentment.

It was successful in the end and I don't regret doing it even though at the time both thought I was nuts to do so. A bit like making two squabbling kids spend time together to find a commonality between themselves. They both learned from it what I cherished about one another and earned a mutual respect for one another as well as making any subsequent interactions between the three of us far less drama filled and chaotic.

_____________________________

Ms Jo

She dealt her pretty words like Blades -
How glittering they shone -
And every One unbared a Nerve
Or wantoned with a Bone -

I want a sensitive man - one who'll cry when I hit him.

(in reply to Nikko1962)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/5/2007 2:06:24 PM   
pinksissyPA


Posts: 90
Joined: 6/2/2006
Status: offline
my First Owner loaned me out to a lesbian couple as punishment for a catty remark that i made about them at a party.  Unbeknownst to me They were friends of my Owner so as punishment i was given to Them for a weekend and was told to obey Them as i would my Owner.

pink

(in reply to SDFemDom4cuck)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/6/2007 3:17:51 AM   
Eldritchdancer


Posts: 101
Joined: 12/26/2006
Status: offline
While this is Ask a Mistress, I feel the need to chime in.

Anyone who would 'loan' their sub/slave out, like he/she was a party favor, doesn't respect their property. In MY eyes. That doesn't mean it is the same for anyone. But submission is a precious gift and should be treated as such.

With that caveat in place, allowing a sub/slave to be Trained in something, preferably with me there as well, would be acceptable. Provided, of course, it was something I didn't know how to do the training for.

Take my words as you will.

Master Darkmoon

(in reply to pinksissyPA)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/6/2007 8:27:00 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikko1962

To learn more about your sub's psyche and/or devotion to you, have you ever loaned your submissive to someone that you trusted, but this person was someone you knew your sub didn’t like for an evening of play or a weekend while you were away?


No.

I only loan our and allow Fox to play with people he wants to and whom I trust.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to Nikko1962)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/6/2007 10:10:28 AM   
iwearpanties


Posts: 509
Joined: 7/21/2005
Status: offline
kinda wondering what did you go thur Pink

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/6/2007 3:49:54 PM   
MissOchistic


Posts: 315
Joined: 4/30/2007
Status: offline
i am a slave and not a Mistress...but i can tell you that if i was loaned out to one of Master's friends without thorough discussion and full consent on my part, i would do it anyways for i am His. However, He would have lost my respect as a Master and as a man, if not my devotion.

_____________________________



"The amount i care for Thee
is more than two, but less than three."

"Submission is a potlatch."

(in reply to Nikko1962)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/6/2007 9:23:22 PM   
Domin8tingUrDrmz


Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
Status: offline
I would loan a slave to anyone I would loan my car or home to, or anyone that I would entrust my children with.  However, I value my children, car, and home (and would value my slave) and do not trust just anyone with my possessions or children.  That said, if it was a dear friend of mine, and they were willing to comply with my rules, then yes, I would loan my slave to them for a specific purpose.  If the purpose were one that would cause harm to my slave, then I would not honor their request.  I would need to know, and be comfortable with, all the details and intended use before agreeing to such a loan.  It would matter not if my slave actually liked the person, only that I trusted the person to treat my slave in a manner that I am comfortable.  There could be a purpose for lending him to someone he disliked such as the example provided regarding creating harmony.  It could also serve to prove his level of devotion to me and his level of trust in my judgment.  Whether or not I permitted play with my slave would be another story entirely, but that was not how I interpreted the question.

< Message edited by Domin8tingUrDrmz -- 5/6/2007 9:25:31 PM >


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(in reply to MissOchistic)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/6/2007 11:29:42 PM   
TigressFL


Posts: 239
Joined: 6/8/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Einzelganger

So, a question for the Dommes: if someone you loved gave you a precious gift, one that could not be replaced with one identical to it, would you casually loan it out to your friends? Just a little food for thought...



Personally, I do not want anyones "precious gift of submission", they can keep it or give that "gift" to someone else. What I do want is their "acceptance" of my being "The Boss" in our relationship and being happy that I "accept" them for who they are and the role they "want" to have in my life.
.
---------------------
To the Op:

When it comes to loaning my boy or girl to someone that I know they "do not like", I may take he or she around the person to see the reaction, however, loaning them out while I am not there is not something I would have any desire to do. I would not view it as a test as it would be more about simply wanting to know how they would handle it.

_____________________________

Live your own truth, Life is short

(in reply to Einzelganger)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/6/2007 11:48:51 PM   
Joeconero


Posts: 19
Joined: 10/15/2006
Status: offline
Being used for demonstrative purposes while supervised count (IE like a class?)

(in reply to TigressFL)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/7/2007 12:12:10 AM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline
You know what I've noticed?  Few male subs object to being loaned out (to another female, that is), whereas female subs--well, some will do it and some won't, but it's always a big step for them.

And yes, that's a generalization.

(in reply to Nikko1962)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/7/2007 9:31:50 AM   
canupleaseme


Posts: 775
Joined: 7/9/2006
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Whilst I would happily allow my boy to help someone lifting or fixing their pc etc I would never ever ever allow anyone esle to have what I have with him at all.  And if he wanted that I would have to think very carefully about wether I should be his mistress or not.  Im not a selfish person by any means but my boy is mine and what we have is unique to us and the thought of anyone else getting their hands on him doesnt sit right with me at all.  And its not becasue I am insecure and would worry he would stray its just that he is mine and ive spent the time training him for me, the idea of him submitting to another would freak me out 

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Proud mistress

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/7/2007 9:40:20 AM   
Rose4Mistress


Posts: 162
Joined: 3/12/2007
Status: offline
From a purely sexual manner, that sounds very hot to me.  But on an emotional level...I would not be comfortable being loaned out, unless my owner was present to watch.  Even then, I would not like it, simply because when I give myself to someone, I give myself to them, not to any of their friends.
So, this will remain an undone fantasy of mine...good for thinking about, not for doing :)

(in reply to canupleaseme)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/7/2007 10:41:17 AM   
MsCece2u


Posts: 85
Joined: 9/10/2005
From: DC
Status: offline
Well I have been on the recipient of being loaned a slave for a weekend.  However the Domme and I had a very good understanding of Her rules during this weekend and it was discussed thoroughly by the Domme and slave before I was given consent to play with said slave.  Now from personal experience I permitted a sub to do some training with a Domme that lived closer to her because I thought I could trust that Domme.  It was not a good idea.  The Domme attempted to collar the sub without speaking to Me first.  She knew that I had her under consideration however it didn't seem to matter.  That taught me a valuable lesson.  Now I would not ever consider loaning either my boy or girl out for anything other than heavy lifting or perhaps light housework if I had known the dominant for a long time.  As for any type of play only if I was present and I would never loan them to anyone whom they didn't like.

_____________________________

Ms Cece
Tis better to let people think that you are a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.

(in reply to Rose4Mistress)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Loaning out your sub - 5/7/2007 11:02:45 AM   
Ericus1


Posts: 47
Joined: 1/13/2007
Status: offline
Just a couple of comments from a slave who has been loaned out:

1.  Anything that would go wrong i consider Her fault, not just Her responsiblity.
2.  It is not something i want or enjoy, but if it would bring that special smile to Her face i would do it.  Because Her happiness is paramount.
3.  If you need to do it to test a sub's love/devotion, you need to find a new sub.

ericus

(in reply to Nikko1962)
Profile   Post #: 36
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