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RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/11/2005 11:11:10 AM   
Emmmrld


Posts: 57
Joined: 4/21/2005
From: Las Vegas, Nevada
Status: offline 		Well it wasn't about her life being smeared. It was kept general for what I would think are obvious reasons.

If you read the original post it was just a little background on her because her opinions are very strong on background checks.

Background checks is what this thread is on - at what stage in a relationship do you do them? Etc. I'm not referring to casual play.


(in reply to ruffnecksbabygir)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/11/2005 11:24:03 AM   
ruffnecksbabygir


Posts: 412
Joined: 1/4/2005
Status: offline 		i think a background check can be useful, sure....but if you use common sense, if you trust your instincts about a person and take caution to all the "red flags" then that should be sufficient...but that's not to say that it will prevent you from becoming a victim from some serial killer or conartist....there aren't enough safe calls and background checks in the world that can keep anyone 100% safe from falling victim to someone that's dedicating themself to finding ways of committing a crime and getting away with it.

i find it a little naive of many in the lifestyle who always preach the whole "safe call" and "safe word" as if that is all you need to protect yourself...sure, a safe call can be a good idea and a safe word, although i find no use for it, i am sure is helpful as well, but it can't take the place of common sense and personal responsibility for ones actions as an adult. If you're going to meet someone you should meet in public places, not in a dark alley somewhere, if you don't know the person well don't fly half way around the globe to meet them, these are just the obvious, i don't see how a background check can protect anyone who isn't taking responsiblity for their own life.

When ever i have met anyone online which i plan on meeting in person i do a quick search to make sure they aren't a registered sex offender, i check their name and number make sure it's not some made up number etc....but i still used the precautions to meet in public, not go to their home or bring them to mine etc....no different than if i were to meet someone at a bar or club, i wouldn't just take them home...if i did and i got hurt i'd have to blame mysef too, for being a moron.

_____________________________

~hugs~
Babygirl

:Disclaimer: The above is only this slave's opinion:

"And Those Who Danced Were Thought To Be Quite Insane By Those Who Could Not Hear The Music" -- Angela Monet

(in reply to Emmmrld)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/11/2005 12:03:39 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily
I've had bad people crop up in my life after thinking they were ok, and I've learned much. However, I don't fool myself by thinking I am immune to letting in con artists or misjudging people at first glance.

I'm not exactly blaming the victim as much as I'm saying that sometimes we contribute a great deal to extending our suffering.
I still meet people who are liars (they start small), cheats (because wife doesn't understand), and potential sociopaths. I defintely don't shut myself off from any possibility, and am not afraid of meeting most people, and I even go ahead and misjudge them initially by automatically assuming they are decent human beings worthy of a certain level of trust; however, I definitely pay attention to their behavior, and get involved or uninvolved accordingly. I'll tell you what though, it wouldn't take me 4years, and if it did, you could place a good percentage of blame on me.

quote:

I find it particularly alarming that we, mostly woman in this discussion, continue to blame the victim and feel that she should have known better. That, in and of itself, is the most troubling thing for me through this conversation.
Lily

I understand that we don't want to victimize her again. My response was to background checks. I would sympathise with and help a woman if she said I've discovered my partner is a scoundrell and I need help leaving him. I however am of the view that if I want to be respected I must take responsibility for my good and bad choices, and make appropriate adjustements so that I don't continue to make same mistakes.. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/11/2005 12:08:00 PM   
RiotGirl


Posts: 3149
Status: offline 		Well said Babygrl. i also agree that with all the safe calls, and safety precauations one is to make it doesnt gaurentee your safety. Even back ground checks arent fool proof. what about the serial killer whose just in his prime and hasnt been caught yet? People tend to think that if some one else is "not good" or "evil" there is some way of "proving" it. Like they HAVE to have a record. Ya know, alot of evil people go through life doing evil things and not getting caught. Our laws, our justice is not fool proof.

On the flip side find some one whose really good at words, persuasion, and well they never REALLY did anything wrong.

Or another flip ppl unjustly accused and convicted.

Our system isnt fool proof. i believe there is no solid way to discover if some one is a predator or not

the best way would be common sense like Ruff said.

Ding Ding, the answer to the thread questions is : i dont believe in back ground checks because i believe they are a false sense of security

i believe that there is always some one smarter, and stronger, wiser, cleverer, ect out there. No matter how hard you try and keep yourself safe, there's going to always be that ONE person out there whose going to be able to break through and prey on you. That one person who does everything right and you trust, and turns around and preys on you.

i've talked to people, who tell me its not going to happen. They've their own fool proof plan. They're too smart, they're too this and that and yadda yadda yadda. Just like the good ol united states. We thought we were fool proof. We thought we were safe in this country. We thought it would never happen to us.

So really, if a place with the utmost highest security system, some of the smartest ppl, the most advanced technology can not PREVENT falling victem, what makes you think its not possible for you?

Think you're smarter, stronger, tougher, smarter then the good ol US of A?

Hardly.

< Message edited by RiotGirl -- 5/11/2005 12:17:53 PM >

(in reply to ruffnecksbabygir)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/11/2005 12:16:09 PM   
Emmmrld


Posts: 57
Joined: 4/21/2005
From: Las Vegas, Nevada
Status: offline 		Reference checks on someone are great to have as well as information on someone for a variety of reasons.

People in this community aren't supposed to "talk" about events at play parties. So if you don't ask, no one is going to tell you.

I have SEVERAL friends whom I think are nice wonderful people, ironically share similar kinks, but their style in play is not one I'd even consider playing with.

Sure safe calls and safe words won't stop you from a maniac who is bound to harm or kill you. But what it does do is help give police more time to catch the person. How long would you have to be missing before someone would notice? *rehtorical question* That's more of the premise of the safe calls.

But those are all things for initial contact.

I don't think that those things are useful when you are talking long term relationship / marriage. I'm really interested in hearing from folks who are in or have been in or are LTR minded about background checks before getting married.

My friend, given her experience, thinks that when the relationship is LTR and you are going to be sharing finances (including living together) that is when you do a full background check.

This thought just hit me ... are background checks done in a prenuptual agreement? Or if you were needing a prenuptual agreement would you have already done a background check?


(in reply to ruffnecksbabygir)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/11/2005 12:23:20 PM   
RiotGirl


Posts: 3149
Status: offline 		Emmrld

And what if the person hasnt ever been caught before? What if no ones "tattled" on them before? What if they just up and decide its time to become a criminal?

Still thing its a false sense of security.

i think prenups are done because it helps with the whole trust issue. Possibly both? Pre nups are just another way to finiacially protect yourself. Though they can even be gotten around.

(in reply to Emmmrld)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/11/2005 12:24:22 PM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Emmmrld
This thought just hit me ... are background checks done in a prenuptual agreement? Or if you were needing a prenuptual agreement would you have already done a background check?

I wouldn't necessarily do a background check just because I got married with someone, but if we were going to buy a house or car together it would make sense to me to do so.

Funny enough when the boyfriend and I discussed marriage (a hypothetical years away possibility) he immediately insisted upon a pre-nuptual agreement. It surprised me that he was so vehement about it but I completely agreed that it made sense for our lifestyle for everyone's protection.

(in reply to Emmmrld)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/11/2005 12:30:59 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Emmmrld
No harshness about it. She didn't know. When she shared with me that he controlled ALL the finances I was like "uh sweetie doesn't that sound odd to you?" I know at first I didn't think much of her asking him for cash when we'd run to the store or go to a movie.
He masked his poor behavior under the guise that he was dominant.

I don't think it's a problem that he controlled the finances; the problem was his secrecy about it; Fate also asked, didn't bill collectors call the house asking where their money is? I don't know about your house, but one of the reasons I try to keep bills paid is because of all the unwelcome attention I get from minimum wage earners calling me (or anyone who answers the phone at my house) at all hours asking for their money.

"
quote:

She was shocked to find he was hiding the mail from her. Mail from her grandparents, bills etc. His 'excuse' was that he was the Dom and he should be in control of everything. He was in charge of the finances. If she ever had cash on her he would take it from her. At some point she realized that this wasn't 'right'. She had no idea if the bills where paid, or how much was in the account to buy stuff for the baby.

she caught him throwing out a big box of mail one day. Mail for the past 6 months he'd been hiding. He wasn't paying the bills. She decided to stay and try to work it out.

A month after that the police arrived at her house one morning to take him into custody. He was wanted for over $10,000 in check fraud. He was writing checks on a closed account.
At that point she decided to leave him. What also came out in all that was that he had priors of the same nature but on a national level. She didn't know anything about it.
He came back after time served. She proceeded with the divorce. He tried to stop her at every turn. Trying to be a good parent she wouldn't talk badly about him infront of their child. They shared custody.

Well it wasn't long until he was up to no good again. This time he took their daughter's social security number to open credit accounts to start a leather business. Six months after that she discovered that he had been molesting their daughter. In addition to the molestation charges he has more check fraud charges wiating to be tried for after the molestation charges.
"

Please understand that I'm not saying she deserved it... Understand also that I have been lied to and taken advantage of, so I live in a glass house on this account.
My point was that having a bacground check would not have helped... I'll shut up now... M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to Emmmrld)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/11/2005 4:50:02 PM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline 		BlkTallFullFig, just a note, this is not a direct response to you, only to this thread in general.

I have had some very mixed emotions reading through this thread. I have seen the same thing happen on many other threads regarding proactive safety procedures and I am not sure why but it always seems to divide into two camps. The arguments become heated and devolve to wording that does not make a positive point for either camp, which is sad because the message gets lost in all of that "stuff".

If you were going to build a house would you attempt to do the entire thing with just a hammer? Of course not because that would just not make sense.

In life and our pursuit of finding a companion, partner or playmate we all have a tool box full of tools. We have the tools we were born with...our intuitions and internal red flags. We have the tools we have acquired through our experiences in this world...common sense and experience. We have tools that are available to us as members of a community....references and opportunities to get to know people before we involve ourselves to a deeper level. We have tools that are available to us as members of society....background checks, the internet and public records.

Our lives, our personal safety and our emotional health are most certainly more important than any house that we could ever build. Go ahead and use all of the tools in your box if you feel that they are the right tools for the job. Just remember that there is no one tool that will do it all and even the best laid foundations have been known to develop cracks sometimes.

We all, or at the very least most of us, have common goals in life to find someone we can share our little piece of the world with, whether it be just for the moment or until the end of time. We all want that person to be someone that we can trust. Especially in this lifestyle, trust is of utmost importance to us. In our search for that elusive goal we all take risks, we have to or we would be forever alone. Sometimes it works out ok, sometimes it even works out great. But sometimes we run into someone who is just waiting for that opportunity when we put ourselves in a position of trusting and let that guard down...to whatever degree. There are those who are just very skilled at seeing that window of opportunity and when they do you can bet they are going to pounce on it.

This is not to say that we need to live out our lives suspicious, untrusting and paranoid. But we can not stick our heads in the sand and say that it can not happen....or even worse that we have NO control over it at all.

It was mentioned in this thread that women tend to blame the victim. This is a very true and unfortunate statement. Women do tend to blame the victim because to relate to them any other way would mean that they would have to also realize their own vulnerabilities. It is much easier to say that "That would never happen to me" than it is to say "There but for the grace of God go I". Denial is much nicer place than reality sometimes.

Use your tools ladies, as you deem necessary. No it will not guarantee that you will never fall prey to a skilled hunter, but at least you can have the peace of mind that you are doing what you can to lessen the odds. And before I get jumped all over...yes I do realize that men can be victims too and by all means I do not mean to suggest that only women should be proactive in taking responsibility for their own safety...certainly men should too.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/11/2005 7:07:43 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin
In life and our pursuit of finding a companion, partner or playmate we all have a tool box full of tools. We have the tools we were born with...our intuitions and internal red flags. We have the tools we have acquired through our experiences in this world...common sense and experience. We have tools that are available to us as members of a community

This pretty much summarizes what I was trying to say, though you probably said it better.
quote:

But we can not stick our heads in the sand and say that it can not happen....or even worse that we have NO control over it at all.

Exactly, it can happen, but we do have control over what we do when and if it unfortunately does. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/11/2005 7:30:11 PM   
DrkAngl


Posts: 145
Joined: 4/9/2005
Status: offline 		I wish I'd done one on my late husband. Your friend's story sounds a lot like mine, except mine was a vanilla relationship. After we were married and in a place of our own, that's when I found out he was a total control freak,verbally abusive and later got physical about it, hid the bills which I thought were being paid, found out he was a drunk too. You know it's bad when they drink the mouthwash.

He was also bad about taking money out of my purse and trying to make me think I'd merely forgotten about it, or that I was stupid. Three months after I'd left him, took the baby with me, he died. At least our son doesn't have to deal with his dad now. He would be putting me down in front of the kid, or worse, putting him down. No way to raise a kid.

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/13/2005 6:59:13 AM   
Kiaban


Posts: 124
Joined: 7/11/2004
Status: offline 		I did a background check on me....and now I can't play with myself

(in reply to DrkAngl)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/14/2005 8:27:16 AM   
SenorX


Posts: 142
Joined: 12/23/2004
Status: offline 		When things start up, both paarties usually view their relationship and the other party through rose-colored lenses. How Wwe will feel about that other person when the coloring fades and Wwe begin to see the other person more clearly is the determining factor. Most people, though (regardless of vanilla or Ds) don't take the necessary time nor precautions.

This was a very good post, emmmrld. It sheds light on a topic that needs to be kept in the forefront.

Best Regards,

X

(in reply to Emmmrld)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/14/2005 9:33:21 AM   
MrThorns


Posts: 919
Joined: 6/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Emmmrld

So my questions to you folks are:

What do you think of background checks?
Do you think that they are needed in "dating" today?
When do you think it is a good idea to do such at thing?
If you wouldn't do a background check why?

Emerald :)



I think background checks should be done by law enforcement agencies financial institutions and the like, in order to accomplish their duties. If anyone else want's to know something about me, then they should ask me. They can choose to either believe what I tell them, or not. If they choose not to believe me, then they probably should avoid placing their lives in my hands.

How ever did our ancestors survive their relationships??? They didn't use background checks and yet, amazingly, some of them stayed together happily for 50+ years. Maybe people were just more honorable back then. Maybe people just had more common sense and really got to know the people they were considering getting involved with. I know that a lot of abuse took place in some of those relationships of yesteryear. I know that people stayed together because getting a divorce was a sin...or fear of more harm from the abuser if they left...or there were kids to take care of...many of the same reasons people don't leave abusive relationships today. Will background checks eliminate that fear of leaving? No. Will background checks reduce the number of abusers? No. Will background checks help you avoid getting involved in an abusive relationship? No. Here's why:

1. Background checks create a false sense of security. The information is only as good as the provider's research abilities. I've run my own information through some of these background check sites, and the only thing that was accurate was my name.

2. Many of the most violent criminals in history never had a criminal record.

3. Identity theft is rampant in today's society. If someone can access your bank accounts, steal or SSN, usernames and passwords, don't you think it possible for them to also create a new background for themselves?

Just my 2 cents here, but I think people just need to keep their eyes open and follow up on what their instincts and common sense are telling them.


~Thorns

_____________________________

~"Do you know what the chain of command is? Its the chain I beat ya with when ya don't follow my command."

"My inner child is a mean little fucker"

(in reply to Emmmrld)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/14/2005 11:54:57 AM   
DesertRat


Posts: 2774
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: NM/USA
Status: offline 		Minx and I kinda did half-assed background checks on each other when we were first getting to know each other. She did it first by finding my address and phone number on the internet. When she asked me if that was my address and phone number, I was impressed and quite pleased...it showed she was thinking seriously about us and had good common sense. I then did a google search on her name and found enough on various sites to indicate that she was indeed who she claimed to be.

The best thing we did, in terms of checking each other out, was spend many many long hours every day talking online. We talked about anything and everything. The more we did that, the more real she became to me.

We met for the first time just a few weeks ago. She introduced me to the woman she lives with, and she checked in with that woman by phone every day we were together. After spending every minute together for 10 days, we each had a very good idea of each other's true identity. I found no inconsistencies in our time together....found confirmation, in fact, that she was precisely the amazingly wonderful person I met online.

Bob

(in reply to Emmmrld)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/16/2005 9:30:44 AM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline 		Its been interesting reading all of this. I'm inclined to agree with the spirit of Erin's post, that when looking for a potential partner we should wisely use all the tools at our disposal. But I still find myself distrustful of either using or relying on background checks. Partly that comes from my own tendancy towards self reliance, but also from a realization that things such as background checks are not always reliable. In that regard I also find myself agreeing with MrThorns remarks about them creating a false sense of security. Worse they may simply be wrong. The information provided is only as good as the researcher who created it, and if they didn't do a good job you may be getting things that are simply inaccurate and at worse grossly innacurate.

To give an example from my own experience, I did a credit check on myself last year and was surprised to discover that this supposedly reliable document had quite a lot wrong about me, including my birthdate, age, address (which was really odd considering I had to give them my correct address to get the copy mailed to me), as well as a number of items from my credit history simply missing. What is a little frightening about this is that this report, as inaccurate as it was, directly affects my life and my credit rating. Fortunately banks also tend to judge you individually, rather than relying solely on these reports. There is a lesson in that I think for all of us about background checks. If its a tool you feel the need to use keep in mind that the information is only as good as the source. Judging someone solely on such a check really is not fair to that person as it will only give you one piece of the puzzle.

As for myself, I still find the best method for me is to observe their own behavior over time and let them prove themselves by their own actions.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to DesertRat)
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RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/16/2005 9:10:57 PM   
SirSTRYKER


Posts: 284
Joined: 8/15/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I have no problem if someone wants to do a background check on me. If they asked me for permission, I would encourage them to do so.

What He said!!! I once met a sub on line. After a while she actually told Me where she worked, for a police department. When, again after a while, I asked her for a meeting she was hesitant...so I OFFERED her My ssn, full name and addy and guess what, she DID infact run a background check...and guess what??? Just like all the others ran on Me from the military, the gun dealership I shop at, My security firm I work for and everything else, I came back clean. Now I don't advise giving just ANYONE your personal info to be sure. But IF, after knowing or thinking about meeting someone, you did ask for such info and they refused...that may be a clue to dismiss them!!! I am very sorry for the trouble and hassles your friend is going through. Do please send her My best for her and her child in the future.

_____________________________

B.O.H.I.C.A. (bend over here it comes again.)

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)
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RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/17/2005 10:48:44 PM   
SenorX


Posts: 142
Joined: 12/23/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Padriag


quote:

...If its a tool you feel the need to use keep in mind that the information is only as good as the source. Judging someone solely on such a check really is not fair to that person as it will only give you one piece of the puzzle.

As for myself, I still find the best method for me is to observe their own behavior over time and let them prove themselves by their own actions.


That's what people did back when they dated in the old days. Amazingly, the failure rate of marriages before instant self-gratification whereby Wwe didn't have the ability to pull background and credit checks was near single digits and today the failure rate of marriages is at above 50% by all reputable statistics.

Perhaps that says something about the old-fashioned principle of patience in courtship prior to commitment?

Best Regards,

X

(in reply to Padriag)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/18/2005 1:19:59 AM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline 		Actually the last census statistic I can recall was something like 67% of marriage end in divorce. Bit frightening. Here's something else that concerns me.

quote:

But IF, after knowing or thinking about meeting someone, you did ask for such info and they refused...that may be a clue to dismiss them!!!


So now, because a few of you think this is a great idea, despite the fact that a lot of people including the government are saying not to give out your SSN, it becomes a litmus test for if you are real and if you refuse because you are concerned about identity theft you're dismissed. Thanks folks, those of us trying to keep our lives out of the hands of credit fraud appreciate that ever so much.

Here an in another thread about "Silent Alarms" that supposedly guarantee safe 1st meetings I'm seeing not just bad advice but somethinge else. I'm seeing people looking for a quick easy, and very lazy way, to feel safe. I'm seeing people looking for a crutch to excuse them from having to think for themselves and use their own judgement.

If someone wants to meet me and wants to feel safe, fine, bring a friend. Bring a guy friend, bring a friggin professional wrestler for all I care. Hire an actual off duty cop. Or better still, lets just meet on the front steps of the local police station... seriously, they have a couple nice park benches here, we can have a brown bag lunch. No... not romantic enough... not a problem, how about a carriage ride through historic Winston-Salem... complete with carriage driver for a chaperon... they've got this nice lil resteraunt too... all very public, only open during the day... you know... broad day light, hundreds of tourist about. Feel safe yet?

It amazes me the paranoia I see in these threads. Try to understand folks, you will never ever be 100% safe. You could run a background check on me, hire a private detective to follow me around for a month, interrogate my family and friends, require 100 verifiable references, ten forms of ID, etc. etc. ad nauseum... and die in a car wreck on the way to meet me. Welcome to reality, it ain't safe out there. The trick isn't to live your life paranoid, live in fear, live dwelling on every horror story you've ever heard until you've scared yourself to death. The trick is to realize that for every one of those stories, even if they are all true... there must be thousands of people who managed to meet and were just fine (Or else explain to me how literally hundreds of thousands of people go to munches and fetish events every year and the vast majority of them have a great time and nothing bad happens?). Take a few precautions, use some good judgement, and feel free to take your time. But if you're looking for a written guarantee that the person you are about to meet is Mr or Mrs Perfect, it ain't gonna happen. An if someone does hand you such a document... I'd worry about THEM! You can never be 100% safe... you're probably damn lucky if you can be 90% safe. But what you can do is accept the fact that none of us has any guarantees, all we can do is the best we can do. You can ask questions, you can get to know them, you can meet them in a public place (even on a park bench in front of the police station if you like), you can take the time to see what sort of person they are before you take things any further than friendship.

And who knows, maybe while you're taking that time and asking those questions you'll discover this person is really neat. You'll figure out what you have in common and that you both love eating with chopsticks, or like Zakk Wilde or some other odd ball thing that you thought nobody else in the world but you liked. And maybe, just maybe in all that you'll find a connection that goes deeper than sex, deeper than a background check, deeper than you expected. Because I can guarantee you this, a background check will not give you someone's life history, it won't give you the whole story. Before you dismiss someone, don't you think you ought to take the time to find out the whole story about a person before you judge them? After all, I see a lot of posts on these message boards complaining about shallow profiles, one line emails, etc. Don't you think judging a whole person by a background check is being just as shallow?

Think about it.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to SenorX)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Back Ground Checks - 5/18/2005 2:12:30 AM   
GentleLady


Posts: 356
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline 		I second every last world of that Padriag.

No background check is going to keep you safe. And neither will a criminal record check (where that is allowed). Be responsible for your own actions and take realistic precautions. Waking up each morning is taking a risk. Minimize your risks wherever possible but do not get anal-retentive about it.

Gentle Lady

_____________________________

All things are possible to those who have patience, try, and are willing to learn.

(in reply to Padriag)
Profile   Post #: 80
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