Suleiman
Posts: 1127
Joined: 9/9/2004
Status: offline
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Hrmm. Okay, I count myself as a romantic, when it comes right down to it. There's some seriously bad poetry in my profile journal from a few months ago. Even so, some folks come off as purely delusional. I normally try to keep my essential judgementalism to myself - hell, they might find what they're looking for, which is cool, as long as it isn't me - but I've noticed that there is a distince subset of folks who, to the best of my ability to determine, insist on living on a different planet than the one I'm on.
The worst of them, in my opinion, are the ones I call "Wannamates" - these are people, male or female, straight, gay, or bi, dom or sub, are basically broken-hearted romantics who have washed out of the vanilla dating scene, discovered the world of kink, and decided that slavery was close enough to marriage for them. Some of them grow out of it and blossom into spectacular individuals, but most of them keep piling up rejections - they got into kink out of desperation, and desperation is never pretty - or worse, they become predator-bait, since there are some unscrupulous souls in every community, and a vast swimming school of them online, who prey on the desperate and lonely - but either way, they don't recieve the community suport and friendship they really need, and become embittered, nasty, and generally unpleasant to be around. Many of them become serious trolls, arguing loudly about what it means to be a "Twue Mawthter" or "Twue Thubmittiff" or just sending nasty Emails to people.
Now of course, there are those romantic souls who simply have a specific fantasy that they're looking to fulfill, that includes all the hearts and flowers and stuff like that along with the whips and chains. Doms who want to be the Knight In Shining Armor (KiSA), subs who want to be the Damsel (or Dudesel) In Distress (DiD), and others of their frumious ilk. Nothing wrong there, as long as they don't get wrapped up in the fantasy. Some of these folks get really loopy when reality encroaches on their fantasy wildlife habitat.
Fantasy is a big issue in the world of kink. I can't count the number of times where I've said something to the effect of "Really, this is all just role-playing" only to have someone hotly reply to the effect of "Maybe what you do is fake, but I'm REAL."
I'm sick of reality. In the real world I have to pay bills, interact with people I don't like, and sell my dignity a scrap at a time just to get by. Fantasy is where it's at. I just have a portion in my mind that tells me that this isn't what's real - kind of like when I'm watching TV. Living the fantasy is great, and I'll do it every chance I can get, for as long as I can manage, but it's still just a fantasy.
Then again, it's a matter of record that there were people in the sixties calling up the coast guard, telling them that seven american citizens were shipwrecked on an uncharted island in the pacific. Some folks just have a hard time differentiating fantasy from reality.
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Think of my verbosity as a sort of litmus test for our relationship. I write in a manner identical to how I speak and how I think. If you can not cope with what I have written here, it is probably for the best if we go our separate ways.
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RE: Submission & Romanticizing - 
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