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I seriously wish there was a way we could warn other gi... - 7/22/2007 9:41:03 PM

SexyRed

Posts: 529
Joined: 8/19/2004
Status: offline

I am not usually so dramatic, but I was looking at a web site, called xxxxxxxxxxxxxx and SO want to start one on Collarme.

I know we cannot, but I have just had to deal with a total lying, cowardly, so called "dom" and I so wish I could save the other girls in NY and NJ a heartache.

Sometimes even really smart girls like me get taken in, my fault 50% for sure, but still...grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Thanks for the vent.

[Mod Note: URL removed]

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 7/22/2007 10:39:28 PM >

_____________________________

A trucker will slow down for a blonde, stop for a brunette, but back up 500 yards for a redhead!

Post #: 1

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 9:46:14 PM

MzMia

Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline

Many con-artists, liars, fakes and users online.
It is just the way of the internet.
I am sorry you were hurt.
People are people, being on here does not make you safe, decent, sane or nice.
Please be careful, I find it is always in MY best interest to error on the side of CAUTION.

Good luck, and be careful.

< Message edited by MzMia -- 7/22/2007 9:47:31 PM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain

What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to SexyRed)

Post #: 2

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 9:52:03 PM

SexyRed

Posts: 529
Joined: 8/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

Many con-artists, liars, fakes and users online.
It is just the way of the internet.
I am sorry you were hurt.
People are people, being on here does not make you safe, decent, sane or nice.
Please be careful, I find it is always in MY best interest to error on the side of CAUTION.

Good luck, and be careful.

Thanks, MzMia. It is just amazing to me that I, who can usually counsel other women on the right thing to do, or what to watch out for, fell so hard for someone in such a short amount of time. Now, of course, my "falling" was tempered with distrust, but this man was so convincing, calling every day, texting all day, words of such intensity and actions relevant.

Then...with no rhyme or reason, no falling out whatsoever, he just cancels a date last night, with no words. I tried to reach out to him to find out what is wrong and he is silent. Then tonight, he re-activated his profile (which he deactivated when we met, even though I said nothing about it) and still will not develop the balls to tell me what went wrong.

I mean, he was a grand champ at the words and I am SO PISSED THAT I FELL FOR IT.

I thought I was over such drama, but sadly, it never ends with certain species.

_____________________________

A trucker will slow down for a blonde, stop for a brunette, but back up 500 yards for a redhead!

(in reply to MzMia)

Post #: 3

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 9:56:09 PM

MzMia

Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline

Disappearing acts? Oh sweetie that is just cruel.
He could not even face you, he probably will reappear again.
I am actually a bit floored, he sounds like a new breed of ratman.

Sexy, the ignore button on here is your friend.
Around here many people live to laugh and mock others pain.
Pick yourself up, move on, learn and just be more careful.

< Message edited by MzMia -- 7/22/2007 10:00:00 PM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain

What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to SexyRed)

Post #: 4

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 9:59:36 PM

SexyRed

Posts: 529
Joined: 8/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

Disappearing acts? Oh sweetie that is just cruel.
He could not even face you, he probably will reappear again.
I am actually a bit floored, he sounds like a new breed of ratman.

Yes, you are right, Ratman, ugh. And he is already back here with his non-profile which states, "Not activly looking at this time". So he missed the all important "e" in actively as well as missing his brain, heart and courage to tell someone the truth.

Way to go, Ratman.

_____________________________

A trucker will slow down for a blonde, stop for a brunette, but back up 500 yards for a redhead!

(in reply to MzMia)

Post #: 5

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:00:58 PM

Aileen68

Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline

You have mail Red

(in reply to SexyRed)

Post #: 6

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:01:47 PM

Emperor1956

Posts: 2370
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline

FR: Red, it is never pleasant to learn that we've been taken, on any level. This guy stood you up. It is upsetting, but it hardly is world shattering. I've had friends on CM who have been raped by men they met here, or had significant emotional and physical damage inflicted. I've known women to be financially damaged. You missed a night out. Some perspective, please?

E.

_____________________________

"When you wake up, Pooh," said Piglet, "what's the first thing you say?"
"What's for breakfast? What do you say, Piglet?"
"I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?"
Pooh nodded thoughtfully.
"It's the same thing," he said.

(in reply to SexyRed)

Post #: 7

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:06:17 PM

SexyRed

Posts: 529
Joined: 8/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

FR: Red, it is never pleasant to learn that we've been taken, on any level. This guy stood you up. It is upsetting, but it hardly is world shattering. I've had friends on CM who have been raped by men they met here, or had significant emotional and physical damage inflicted. I've known women to be financially damaged. You missed a night out. Some perspective, please?

E.

Hon, I do understand perspective, but it was not a case of being stood up, which actually neve r happened to me. What happened went way beyond 'stood up", But I am not going to delineate the goings on of the past 3 weeks, suffice it to say, I had my night to vent here, which I never do and I will vent if I want, perspective or not.

But thanks for the support.

_____________________________

A trucker will slow down for a blonde, stop for a brunette, but back up 500 yards for a redhead!

(in reply to Emperor1956)

Post #: 8

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:07:36 PM

WhiplashSmile

Posts: 1472
Joined: 6/8/2004
Status: offline

There should be a website called xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I've encountered a couple of women from this site that
have been less than honest. Believe me, I wish I could
save a few Doms from these so called "sub/slaves".

Yes, if it makes you feel any better, even smart guys like
me get taken in, and yes, my fault 50% for sure as well.
Even when there is a sense that something is not quite right.

[Mod Note: URL removed]

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 7/22/2007 10:40:24 PM >

(in reply to SexyRed)

Post #: 9

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:09:46 PM

MzMia

Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

FR: Red, it is never pleasant to learn that we've been taken, on any level. This guy stood you up. It is upsetting, but it hardly is world shattering. I've had friends on CM who have been raped by men they met here, or had significant emotional and physical damage inflicted. I've known women to be financially damaged. You missed a night out. Some perspective, please?

E.

Emperor? OMG I had no idea it was that bad.
Thank you for sharing, this thread may save some women.
If nothing else, maybe people will be more discerning and careful.

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain

What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to Emperor1956)

Post #: 10

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:10:11 PM

dawndewdropbaby

Posts: 37
Joined: 1/29/2005
Status: offline

Theres a handful I could add to that list. :)

(in reply to WhiplashSmile)

Post #: 11

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:10:12 PM

SexyRed

Posts: 529
Joined: 8/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiplashSmile

There should be a website called Dontdatethem.com.
I've encountered a couple of women from this site that
have been less than honest. Believe me, I wish I could
save a few Doms from these so called "sub/slaves".

Yes, if it makes you feel any better, even smart guys like
me get taken in, and yes, my fault 50% for sure as well.
Even when there is a sense that something is not quite right.

Thanks Whiplash. I agree, men get taken in as well and I never meant to slander only one sex, just this particular vermin.

_____________________________

A trucker will slow down for a blonde, stop for a brunette, but back up 500 yards for a redhead!

(in reply to WhiplashSmile)

Post #: 12

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:13:55 PM

SexyRed

Posts: 529
Joined: 8/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

FR: Red, it is never pleasant to learn that we've been taken, on any level. This guy stood you up. It is upsetting, but it hardly is world shattering. I've had friends on CM who have been raped by men they met here, or had significant emotional and physical damage inflicted. I've known women to be financially damaged. You missed a night out. Some perspective, please?

E.

Emperor? OMG I had no idea it was that bad.
Thank you for sharing, this thread may save some women.
If nothing else, maybe people will be more discerning and careful.

I just want to add, and I should not have to really, that OF COURSE, so many horrific things happen to people here there and everywhere in the world.

My particular vent tonight in no way diminishes those horrors, and if someone were to post about them, I would listen, offer a sympathetic ear and try to help them as well.

I don't expect any answers since I did not pose a question since I know the anser.

I simply decided once to vent.

_____________________________

A trucker will slow down for a blonde, stop for a brunette, but back up 500 yards for a redhead!

(in reply to MzMia)

Post #: 13

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:14:02 PM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

if you're gonna have a pitty party in public you have to be willing to accept the party poopers...yes there are people on this site that suck, but yes there are people on this site that are great...(half of my leather family has profiles on the site so i might be partial)...and if everyone was perfect for everyone this site wouldn't exist...chalk it up as a learning experience and unless you're gonna tell us all the details...cause we thrive on drama....most people aren't gonna wanna hear it...

(in reply to WhiplashSmile)

Post #: 14

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:16:45 PM

sexypet

Posts: 225
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

So i had this whole reply typed out and got some weird "Admin You are not allowed to post in this area" bs message and now it is gone.

Abort, Retry.

Sexyred, i used to date those men from NY/NJ, (when i lived in CT) and i soooooooooooo know what you are talking about. After meeting more than my fair share of men from the internet in person, and thinking i had the "process" down ( how to be smart, and safe with my heart and body), it happened to me again recently. This RI Sir said and did all the right things, until W/we were a couple, that is, and then suddenly He had no honor and His word had no meaning, and i got shelved.

So anyways, i just wanted to let you know that you are not alone, and i know and share in your disappointment.

Dating was supposed to be fun.

i use to use that xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx website, but they recently removed the search by state feature, making the website virtually useless.

[Mod Note: URL removed]

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 7/22/2007 10:37:18 PM >

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 15

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:17:31 PM

SexyRed

Posts: 529
Joined: 8/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: chellekitty

if you're gonna have a pitty party in public you have to be willing to accept the party poopers...yes there are people on this site that suck, but yes there are people on this site that are great...(half of my leather family has profiles on the site so i might be partial)...and if everyone was perfect for everyone this site wouldn't exist...chalk it up as a learning experience and unless you're gonna tell us all the details...cause we thrive on drama....most people aren't gonna wanna hear it...

you are right and when you are right, I will admit that. I will give details privately to those who give a crap and who are in the vicinity of NY and NJ.

_____________________________

A trucker will slow down for a blonde, stop for a brunette, but back up 500 yards for a redhead!

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 16

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:22:04 PM

DiurnalVampire

Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

Unfortunately, one persons bad boy might be someone elses prince charming. This guy screwed you over, yeah, but he might be mr right for the next one to come along.

You can councel others on what to do, but listning to your own advise is usually harder than anything. I know, I cant do it either. I am the one everyone seems to come to for advice, on here, on YIM and in real life, and yet I still manage to screw up royally. Then I look back at it and say you know, had someone else asked me what I thought they should do in this situation I would have had a very different answer.

Dont let a jerk get you dow. Dust off, remind yourself its his loss, and move on.

DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 17

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:24:07 PM

ModeratorEleven

Posts: 2007
Joined: 8/14/2005
Status: offline

Folks, please keep in mind that blacklists are not allowed here and links to such will be removed, along with the raft of flames that usually seem to spring up when this topic rears it's ugly head.

XI

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 7/22/2007 10:29:50 PM >

_____________________________

This mod goes to eleven.

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)

Post #: 18

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:24:44 PM

SexyRed

Posts: 529
Joined: 8/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DiurnalVampire

Unfortunately, one persons bad boy might be someone elses prince charming. This guy screwed you over, yeah, but he might be mr right for the next one to come along.

You can councel others on what to do, but listning to your own advise is usually harder than anything. I know, I cant do it either. I am the one everyone seems to come to for advice, on here, on YIM and in real life, and yet I still manage to screw up royally. Then I look back at it and say you know, had someone else asked me what I thought they should do in this situation I would have had a very different answer.

Dont let a jerk get you dow. Dust off, remind yourself its his loss, and move on.

DV

Thanks, DV you are so right. I just needed a shoulder to talk to, even if online ,since my vanilla friends do not understand the intensity with which we sometimes get involved.

_____________________________

A trucker will slow down for a blonde, stop for a brunette, but back up 500 yards for a redhead!

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)

Post #: 19

RE: I seriously wish there was a way we could warn othe... - 7/22/2007 10:26:42 PM

auroraborealis

Posts: 509
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline

As some have said... there are goobers on every site. It just takes open eyes to see them. We all are hoping like hell people are real, and honest. Trust me when I tell you it could have been much much worse. I took everything a Dom said as the gospel, did his bidding.. was his girl. Dealt with his primary who hated me from step one. I ended up pregnant due to a swift one being pulled on me. Due to all the stress I miscarried and he utterly locked me out and dissapeared for months. Would not return phone calls, e-mails, nothing. I felt like everything was my fault, and I could not turn to the one person that I felt could make it all ok. A missed meeting is a blessing in disguise. If he is not sure enough to meet you... then he was not ready. Shake it off and move on. If I did not become bitter or scarred by what happened to me then surely others can move on and think positively. Everything happens for a reason.

Just as anyone who says right off they don't care what your prefferances are, or what your thoughts are.. you should high tail it. That is no way to begin a relationship.. even just a purely D/s one. It takes communication and a bond. If you don't give a fig about someone then what the hell are you doing playing with others? Buy a blow up doll, a whip, and a tape of someone moaning.. and excuse yourself from the room for a bit.

Just my 2 cents... but then I am technicaly a Switch.. so I know it from both sides of the whip.

_____________________________

Never mistake Kindness for Weakness.

Head of the Valkyrie Brigade!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DsP2TheK0iQ

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 20

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