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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 11:49:31 AM

SimplyMichael

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What a world of difference between the dominance offered (real or imagined) by male dominants compared to female dominants.

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 11:52:02 AM

MistressDoMe

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

What a world of difference between the dominance offered (real or imagined) by male dominants compared to female dominants.

SimplyMichael, I say that all the time.
So many don't even seem to see it.
It is so obvious, and so very sad.
Many Dominant women are almost treated like they are a joke.
What baffles me is, they don't seem to even see it and they accept it.

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 11:55:21 AM

LightHeartedMaam

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

I'm seriously trying to wrap my brain around this because I've never heard of it before. Receiving blow jobs as a humiliation, I mean, it truly boggles my mind so I just went upstairs and asked Michael about it and he pointed out that submissive males with ED or some other sort of dysfunction might very well find that a blow job would be humiliating.

Celeste

Seems it's a good cure for ED! :)

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 11:55:44 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael
What a world of difference between the dominance offered (real or imagined) by male dominants compared to female dominants.

Can you elaborate? I'm not sure what you mean here.

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 12:04:54 PM

BruisedHick

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDoMe

Any submissive that approached me and asked me if I was going to give him oral
pleasures, would be gone in 20 seconds.
It is not for a submissive to approach me and even think about asking me that sort of
thing.

But they may ask if you will.......? Whip them? Have sex with them? Let them clean?

Just trying to get my head around what is wrong with asking for oral.

Don't get me wrong, I think any guy who asks in the first message about something of a sexual nature puts him into a category quickly written off by many as wankers, but what's the difference between asking if blowjobs are part of the arrangement and asking about dressing as a maid and cleaning? Both are, essentially, sexual, but one is perceived by some as being a submissive thing.

What forms of pleasure is a sub allowed to ask about?

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 12:07:55 PM

MistressDoMe

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What forms of pleasure do female submissives ask about?

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 12:11:27 PM

BruisedHick

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That depends on the sub, I would think. But, having never been approached by female subs (at least as a potential dominant) I don't know.

That having been said, my question stands. What pleasures can a male sub ask about without being categorically dismissed?

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 12:15:57 PM

MistressDoMe

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This is not let's make a deal for me.
I don't meet people and negotiate on those terms.
I am not a TOP looking for a bottom.
I am also not a Professional Dominant looking for clients.
Let's wait for the answer from someone that does negotiate the terms,
and along with that will soon be the rates.

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 12:17:04 PM

MHOO314

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

What a world of difference between the dominance offered (real or imagined) by male dominants compared to female dominants.

hmm, what an odd comment, can you explain? I do not see My Dominance measured by sexual manifestations, but rather how I mange the submissive and the dynamic, why is that so different from what a male Dominant offers--real or imagined?

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 12:29:30 PM

WhiplashSmile

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Wonder how this thread would have gone if it was titled "Babe, this don't lick"... basically, about female submissives wanting the Dom to go down on them.

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 12:31:37 PM

BruisedHick

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDoMe

This is not let's make a deal for me.
I don't meet people and negotiate on those terms.
I am not a TOP looking for a bottom.
I am also not a Professional Dominant looking for clients.
Let's wait for the answer from someone that does negotiate the terms,
and along with that will soon be the rates.

To take it to a logical extreme.....

Does he get to ask for food? Clothing? To keep his career/job? Family? Friends? Social life? Female friends? Sex life?

All of these are needs a normal sub has. Over the "courting phase," he will either openly ask about them, or assume they will happen. Openly asking before commiting is undoubtetly the more intelligent course for both sides. And, the devil being in the details, these should all be discussed to find what is important for both sides.

So, he asks about sexual things. Will the relationship be sexual? If yes, he may ask if he gets to orgasm, and on what terms. I would say that is an important thing for many men commiting to servitude. Some enjoy chastity, some call it a deal breaker, just as some Dommes do.

I could go on, but work beckons. I'm sure you see my point of it all being about asking questions, and a simple dismissal in response to the wrong question being asked makes me think it may be in the sub's best interest to ask that question early.

May as well get it out of the way and move on, no?

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 12:38:41 PM

dawntreader

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDoMe

What forms of pleasure do female submissives ask about?

Greetings MistressDoMe,
personally, i think it is how the conversations go when getting to know one another and how this things are brought up and discussed that makes the difference and ofcourse whether the submissive has an agenda or not.
i usually ask the Dominant to tell me about himself (which they always seem to enjoy doing

) and then i am usually asked the same in return. i guess i thought this was how most people do it -

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 12:43:49 PM

SimplyMichael

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So I don't hijack this thread I am going to start a seperate post in the General Section.

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 12:45:50 PM

MistressDoMe

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quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiplashSmile

Wonder how this thread would have gone if it was titled "Babe, this don't lick"... basically, about female submissives wanting the Dom to go down on them.

WHIPLASH!!! I am hoping a female submissive will start one.
You are a mind reader!
Do we have any volunteers?
Any female submissives that approach Male Dominants and ask them if they will give
them oral pleasures and what their rewards will be?
Is that the way it is going these days?

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 12:47:14 PM

BitaTruble

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BruisedHick

But they may ask if you will.......? Whip them? Have sex with them? Let them clean?

Just trying to get my head around what is wrong with asking for oral.

My first reaction to those questions is that they would come from someone looking for a fleshy flogging machine and smacks of what, when and how are you going to Do-Me or let me get off on my kinks.

There's nothing wrong with askin', but asking ain't gettin and if the first things you are askin are all about yourself I have to wonder where you place submission to your dominant on the importance scale in a relationship. It takes all kinds though. My approach is to find out what's expected of me first and if I'm cool with that, then I share what I want (which is negotiable) and what I require (which is not negotiable.)

There's much to be said for timing and patience.

Celeste

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 12:50:44 PM

MistressDoMe

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Thank you Celeste, I am cooking today and you expressed what I was
trying to imply.
The situtation is often so sad, I created this screen name.
Of couse I have another one. : )

This screen name is a play on words, but every time I log on I get about 40 emails
from submissive and Dominant men, that are serious!

< Message edited by MistressDoMe -- 8/19/2007 12:51:12 PM >

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 6:13:46 PM

MisPandora

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BruisedHick

That depends on the sub, I would think. But, having never been approached by female subs (at least as a potential dominant) I don't know.

That having been said, my question stands. What pleasures can a male sub ask about without being categorically dismissed?

In the first email, without even bothering to sign his damn name and with a picture of him and a fish or of his pecker in his paw?????? I mean, that's what we're talking about here, is it not? Inappropriate displays of introductory behavior, to include boys begging for BJS.....

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 6:15:42 PM

MisPandora

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

There's nothing wrong with askin', but asking ain't gettin and if the first things you are askin are all about yourself I have to wonder where you place submission to your dominant on the importance scale in a relationship.

Wonderfully put!!!!

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 8:39:17 PM

AAkasha

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So...what about femdoms and doggie style? Is that a submissive position? How about being on the bottom during sex and having the man control the penetration level? Hmm, it can get confusing.

When I was younger I used to use blow jobs as a way to get men to let me tie them up. I didn't learn how to get my kinky desires met from any bdsm porn, instead, it was all about how I could use the power of seduction to lull a man into feeling safe and frisky enough so that he was vulnerable and would end up having to do as I said. Giving a good blow job while a guy is tied up would help satisfy my urge to hear the moans of desperation, feel the struggling of his body, and have him beg to be untied when I stopped and told him I wasn't going to go any further. This was pre-strap on days, pre ass fucking, pre-many of the kinky things I got into. For me, having a guy on the edge, desperate, was a pretty good femdom start.

There's a scene in the movie "Something Wild" (I think that's the title, I might be wrong) with Melanie Griffith tying Jeff Daniels to the bed, blowing him, and making him talk on the phone to his boss at the same time. I may have the details mixed up, but it's close to that. That had more of an impact/impression on my sexuality than the groveling "worm" type stuff or the woman just barking orders with a man crawling around. It made sense to me that a man's sexuality, and need for release, will drive him to submit to things he would otherwise not. The lightbulb went off in my head.

Then there's another scene with him handcuffed to plumbing under a sink, and that set off a whole new set of kinks,but that's another thread entirely.

Regardless -- I don't mind giving a good blow job. I like to be a sexually effiicent, effective creature and one that can blow a man's mind as well as his body -- so knowing that I can turn him into mush with relative ease is a kick for me. Whether or not I choose to indulge him in this activity is entirely up to me. If I am intimate with a man, I find I want to explore a wide range of sexual adventure with him and that does include giving him plesure - the difference between me ans Ms Vanilla is that he's probably bound, gagged, was forced to "earn" it or it's part of a huge mindfuck where he'll be soon put into pain or a humiliating situation if he wants to continue to receive the treat.

I also like fear, so it's not uncommon for me to thrust a blow job on a man in a situation where he doesn't want one - in a closet at a party, while on the phone with a friend, or in the middle of a long period of chastity.

Akasha

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RE: Honey, this Babe dont suck - 8/19/2007 8:47:19 PM

ocilla

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Yeah, IMO the issue is how it is approached and when. I personally have never had anyone ask this of me. I put a lot of emphasis on the geting to know each otherphase and move face to face to do that very quickly. Face to face results in knowing pretty instantly if you are not compatible at all, and if that is not clear then we progress meeting over coffee etc sorta vanilla...anyway face to face the fellas are always very polite and I cannot imagine them asking such. I have to dmit I would not like being asked to do this - would take a lot of the fun out of it for me for some reason.

But it just so happens that I really love the feel of a cock on my tongue and making a fellas squirm with my oral abilities - but that is perhaps an oral thing for me - I did suck my thumb till I was like 9 years old or something - lol. I do engage in CBT and introduce oral as I am delivering other pleasurable tortures to his ass, cock and balls. The eyes going wide and rolling back as they realize what I am doing to them is priceless. I guess I am in the minority, but who cares - its funs and I enjoy it.

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