RE: So do single female submissives hate men?

RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (Full Version)

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BoiJen -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 11:34:36 AM)
I give I'ma dyke and all...but any woman who's had to clean a men's restroom hates me. How much does it take to actually make it in the bowl? NBA first test: how well do you piss?

amelliagrace -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 11:43:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RRafe They want actual men. Not self centered little boys, who can never be wrong. *That's the reason it took me so blinkin' long to find a soul mate. Excellent answer...even though I'm attached.* *-grace*

IrishMist -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 11:57:59 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RRafe They want actual men. Not self centered little boys, who can never be wrong. Ladies and gentlemen; we have a winner

Bobkgin -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:24:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: IrishMist quote: ORIGINAL: RRafe They want actual men. Not self centered little boys, who can never be wrong. Ladies and gentlemen; we have a winner So do I understand correctly that it is the opinion of several of you who have answered that none of us who are on this system, single, male are "actual men"? That we are all "self centered little boys who can never be wrong"?

AquaticSub -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:29:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Bobkgin So do I understand correctly that it is the opinion of several of you who have answered that none of us who are on this system, single, male are "actual men"? That we are all "self centered little boys who can never be wrong"? Sorry Bob, but there is a percent of the self-labeled male dominants and masters on this site who really are just boys that never want to be told they are wrong. Your OP didn't specify about types of men, it just said "with so many men on this site, why are there so many single female submissives?". Quite frankly, from the e-mails I get as an attached female sub who isn't looking for a male dom, I'm inclined to agree with them that it is a high enough percent that this is a valid point about why there are so many single fem subs here.

CandyLover -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:30:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Bobkgin So do I understand correctly that it is the opinion of several of you who have answered that none of us who are on this system, single, male are "actual men"? That we are all "self centered little boys who can never be wrong"? You're understanding incorrectly; it's not "none", it's "some".

amelliagrace -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:31:49 PM)
*I'd say the error is - if indeed you are doing this - assuming that just because a man is "real", and a "real dom" and there are subbies present, that this automatically adds up to a good match.* In this type of venue you have plenty of doms and subs. Not all of them present themselves acurately. Not all of them, single or or otherwise, are actively seeking a partner(s), they don't reside on the same continent, necessarily share the same politics, spiritual bent, or kinks. Then there are issues of personal tastes and personality. It takes more than a flogger in common to make a good match. *Me Dom, you sub, KNEEL just doesn't cut it, unless they are both complete idiots.* *JMO* *-grace*

RRafe -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:34:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Bobkgin quote: ORIGINAL: IrishMist quote: ORIGINAL: RRafe They want actual men. Not self centered little boys, who can never be wrong. Ladies and gentlemen; we have a winner So do I understand correctly that it is the opinion of several of you who have answered that none of us who are on this system, single, male are "actual men"? That we are all "self centered little boys who can never be wrong"? Not at all. But the ones who are never wrong can never learn from thier mistakes-ones that are quite obvious to the rest of us. It shows a lack of maturity. Narcissists are usually only popular with themselves.

Bobkgin -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:37:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub Bob... you are kidding right? The title was an attempt at humour based on the title "so do Dommes hate men". But the OP is serious enough. It would seem to be the easiest thing in the world to be in a relationship if one were a submissive woman. The only thing I can think of to delay it is selectivity. But selectivity is a two-edged sword: it defines what you want, and it defines what you don't want. Given that some have been here for years, it would seem they have seen an awful lot of what they don't want, and very little if any of what they want. That's a reservoir of knowledge I hope my question is tapping. As I said in the OP: this is no criticism of anyone's choice. I am asking what the men on this system are missing that these women remain single for so long.

AquaticSub -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:41:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Bobkgin As I said in the OP: this is no criticism of anyone's choice. I am asking what the men on this system are missing that these women remain single for so long. Again: All the men here are not the same. And all the women here are not in one area. You simply can not say "There are a lot men, the women should all be paired up". First the men have to be in the woman's area. Then the men have to be compatible. I know lots of men. Most of them I wouldn't dream of dating and only some I would have meaningless sex with. Next, kinks have to match, life dreams have to match. There are SO many different styles of d/s and that has to match too. Just because there are a hundred single male dominants in my area doesn't mean I will be compatible with any of them. Just because there are a thousand male dominants on CM doesn't mean I will find one that suits me and that I suit them. There is so much that goes into this that I think you are ignoring. This is definately not a case of "we hate men". It is a case of odds. If it really were so simple that all male doms and all fem subs would get along, this site would not exist.

RRafe -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:42:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Bobkgin quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub Bob... you are kidding right? The title was an attempt at humour based on the title "so do Dommes hate men". But the OP is serious enough. It would seem to be the easiest thing in the world to be in a relationship if one were a submissive woman. The only thing I can think of to delay it is selectivity. But selectivity is a two-edged sword: it defines what you want, and it defines what you don't want. Given that some have been here for years, it would seem they have seen an awful lot of what they don't want, and very little if any of what they want. That's a reservoir of knowledge I hope my question is tapping. As I said in the OP: this is no criticism of anyone's choice. I am asking what the men on this system are missing that these women remain single for so long. Good lord, you think being a sub is EASY? Do you have any IDEA of the risks involved-and how long it takes to find sane and competent tops?

litleone8620 -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:42:33 PM)
~Fast Reply~ I don't hate all men. I hate the men that think it's ok to talk to me like some of them do just because I'm a submissive woman. The ones that don't look past the label of submissive/slave to the actual person/woman. quote: It would seem to be the easiest thing in the world to be in a relationship if one were a submissive woman. Absolutely it would be the easiest thing. If only that irritating thing didn't get in the way. What's it called? Oh, yeah. Standards. It might be easy for a submissive to find a dominant. But it's also quite dangerous. Our selectivity also keeps us safe.

iammachine -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:44:02 PM)
quote: How selective does one have to be to say there aren't enough men here to include the right one? Actually, it's the other way around. There's too many, it's like trying to find a needle in a haystack. I am not a submissive, but I am a woman. I don't hate men, I dislike people - some of the people I dislike, happen to be men. [:D]

Bobkgin -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:44:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub quote: ORIGINAL: Bobkgin So do I understand correctly that it is the opinion of several of you who have answered that none of us who are on this system, single, male are "actual men"? That we are all "self centered little boys who can never be wrong"? Sorry Bob, but there is a percent of the self-labeled male dominants and masters on this site who really are just boys that never want to be told they are wrong. Your OP didn't specify about types of men, it just said "with so many men on this site, why are there so many single female submissives?". Quite frankly, from the e-mails I get as an attached female sub who isn't looking for a male dom, I'm inclined to agree with them that it is a high enough percent that this is a valid point about why there are so many single fem subs here. I'm glad we cleared up that it is not all, but only some. With the way the quote was being emphasized, it was sounding like it was the only reason (at least for those who spoke of it). And I do understand the other reasons you've mentioned in a previous response. They are certainly all valid. Would it be fair to say that those submissives who are less malleable, less pliable, are more likely to be waiting longer for a match than those submissives who are more malleable and pliable?

AquaticSub -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:48:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Bobkgin Would it be fair to say that those submissives who are less malleable, less pliable, are more likely to be waiting longer for a match than those submissives who are more malleable and pliable? Anyone with more specific standards may have to wait longer. Valyraen and I are quite aware that we will probably have to wait a long time before we find the suitable girl for us. However, my standards are quite high and I'm rather fussy. I found Valyraen easily and I didn't even to go online to do it. You can even flip it. If Valyraen were single and looking on this site, he wouldn't be looking at the more malleable and pliable fem subs because they really don't interest him. He wants a woman who is who she is, not someone he can shape to suit him. There are just too many factors involved in this.

susie -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:49:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Bobkgin quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub Bob... you are kidding right? The title was an attempt at humour based on the title "so do Dommes hate men". But the OP is serious enough. It would seem to be the easiest thing in the world to be in a relationship if one were a submissive woman. The only thing I can think of to delay it is selectivity. But selectivity is a two-edged sword: it defines what you want, and it defines what you don't want. Given that some have been here for years, it would seem they have seen an awful lot of what they don't want, and very little if any of what they want. That's a reservoir of knowledge I hope my question is tapping. As I said in the OP: this is no criticism of anyone's choice. I am asking what the men on this system are missing that these women remain single for so long. You seem to have missed the point completely. It is no easier for a submissive woman to be in a relationship than it is for anyone else. Yes there seem to be a lot more men on here calling themselves "Doms" but that does not mean that one of them is the right match for a particular submissive. The whole point is to find the RIGHT relationship and if that means looking at every male profile on here and turning them all down becuase they do not tick the right boxes then that is the right thing to do. As others have pointed out a large amount of the male profiles are either fake or are men who have no interest in relationships other than starting online conversations while they "spank the monkey"

RRafe -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:51:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub quote: ORIGINAL: Bobkgin Would it be fair to say that those submissives who are less malleable, less pliable, are more likely to be waiting longer for a match than those submissives who are more malleable and pliable? Anyone with more specific standards may have to wait longer. Valyraen and I are quite aware that we will probably have to wait a long time before we find the suitable girl for us. However, my standards are quite high and I'm rather fussy. I found Valyraen easily and I didn't even to go online to do it. You can even flip it. If Valyraen were single and looking on this site, he wouldn't be looking at the more malleable and pliable fem subs because they really don't interest him. He wants a woman who is who she is, not someone he can shape to suit him. There are just too many factors involved in this. My experience with "malleable and pliable" is it =codependent. This would not meet my standards of living a relatively stress free life. I prefer to have a partner-not a dependent.

Bobkgin -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:51:25 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: litleone8620 ~Fast Reply~ I don't hate all men. I hate the men that think it's ok to talk to me like some of them do just because I'm a submissive woman. The ones that don't look past the label of submissive/slave to the actual person/woman. Are you aware that there are some submissives who want to be talked to and treated as a submissive from the word "go"? It is not a role or a label to them, it is what they are (or at least, what they claim to be). To talk to them as a person is a sign you are not strong enough a d/m for them. I can see how men looking to talk with someone like that would end up stepping on toes if they assume to talk that way with everyone.

AquaticSub -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:51:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Bobkgin It would seem to be the easiest thing in the world to be in a relationship if one were a submissive woman. And no. Just no. This reminds me of the person who pitched a fit because submissives were turning him down because they were not sexually attracted to him. I don't submit to just anyone. If you don't have what it takes to interest me, tough.

AquaticSub -> RE: So do single female submissives hate men? (9/25/2007 12:53:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Bobkgin quote: ORIGINAL: litleone8620 ~Fast Reply~ I don't hate all men. I hate the men that think it's ok to talk to me like some of them do just because I'm a submissive woman. The ones that don't look past the label of submissive/slave to the actual person/woman. Are you aware that there are some submissives who want to be talked to and treated as a submissive from the word "go"? It is not a role or a label to them, it is what they are (or at least, what they claim to be). To talk to them as a person is a sign you are not strong enough a d/m for them. I can see how men looking to talk with someone like that would end up stepping on toes if they assume to talk that way with everyone. So unless I wanted to be treated like a slut from the start, I'm not really a submissive it's just a role? Because Valyraen uses my birth name instead of girl, he isn't treating me like a submissive? Come on, Bob. I know you are smarter than that.

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