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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 6:08:20 PM   
CuriousLord


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quote:

ORIGINAL: latexbarbiets

Online experience is absolutely absurd, and folks that have online experience and think its just like that in real life are going to have a big shock. Its Real life or nothing


What about those among us who have both and find the online to still have been a contribution?

Or you're just certain that there's absolutely nothing one could possibly gain?

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 6:31:39 PM   
amelliagrace


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Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life?

Only on Fantasy Island.
 
-grace

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 6:34:22 PM   
luckyslaveboync


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lucky has been in both real time and Internet relationships which have spanned years, and thinks the answer is complex. On the one hand, there are obviously depths that can be reached real time that cannot in cyberspace. On the other hand, sex is mostly in the mind and relationships more so. Sometimes the depth of relationship online can be very great. lucky recalls one instance where a couple had to be separated by distance and were forced into an online relationship, in the course of which one said they learned more about the other online in a few weeks than they had in real life in a year. It is easy to be superficial in real life too, sadly, and sometimes the routines of real life actually impede the development of a relationship. And it is possible that the very nature of an internet relationship being words (admittedly lucky used telephone as well as email) made for more articulation of the relationship and perhaps more creativity. In the end lucky thinks real-world relationships beat online ones, but does attest that online relationships can very very intense, transforming, and satisfying. It all depends on the participants, their commitment, and their abilities and imagination.

(in reply to ErusDespicienta)
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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 6:34:25 PM   
trappedinamuseum


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There is knowledge to gain on both sides of the spectrum.  Both have their advantages, as well as their pitfalls.  What works for one won't work for all...

As for me...I'm dying to get a real taste of "experience".  Maybe I've spent too much time on this site though.


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Don't come back for me.
Don't come back at all" - Jar of Hearts

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 6:34:46 PM   
kntrybumkn


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i have been researching D/s for 7 years, and it was 3 years into that 7 before i ever went to a play party, or met up with a RL Dom for interaction. and ya know what? i wouldn't trade my OL play and learning for anything in the world.

I've met Doms/subs that help form my thoughts on things, and learned the difference between a Domanate and a domineering ass. The subspace one atains mentally can be just as powerful as the one gained physically. Does one feel better then the other...?  yes, who doesn't like to touch and be touched? but mentally? it's all there, every bit of it if you find the right partner.

i've had 1 or 2 OL Doms rock my freakn world, and met a Dom or 2 RL that left me totally dead.

OL is 100% mental. RL is 50/50 with the roughly the same impact. But i truly would rather have a fucking awesome OL Dom that can get me there then a RL Dom that makes me wish i was sleeping.

< Message edited by kntrybumkn -- 10/1/2007 6:42:49 PM >

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 6:35:13 PM   
SexyBlackMan2


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Online is definitely much different that in real life. I do think that being online can help and can make you sort out things...but only to a certain point.

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 6:40:14 PM   
domiguy


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It is rather absurd to talk about people writing essays....Or boast of your online relationships.....It would scream weasel and wanker....Can I learn something.....Sure....Should I boast about it? Probably not.   It would be comparable to touting my love making abilities from the information that I gleaned from reading penthouse forum....Did you know that those fuckers who attend those small midwestern liberal arts schools get all of the pussy? Especially after they smoke a little weed...The talk seems to turn to sex and then everyone gets fucked....It is all rather amazing and clinical shit!

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 6:45:02 PM   
Aileen68


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The internet provided me a link to meet potential doms.  Once I started talking to someone that I liked and seemed to have things in common with, the main goal was to meet in real life asap.  I can't imagine what kind of satisfaction I would ever have in keeping the relationship online only.  It would just be pure frustration.

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 6:46:34 PM   
MadRabbit


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Nope, not even close, not even on the same level, and trying to place the two on the same mantle is merely kidding one's self.

I agree with Archers first post. Anyone who has a few months of real time experience with a power exchange relationship knows that roleplaying online isnt applicable in real time.







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(in reply to xoxi)
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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 6:50:38 PM   
trappedinamuseum


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Actually, D.G....that's kinda what happened at my Liberal arts school...

Everyone was high or drunk, or both, and talking philosophical shit, and then they'd throw some porn in, and the next thing you know, you woke up in bed with a guy (or girl, depending on your sex of choice) or two.

Man, I miss those days.


_____________________________

"You're gonna catch a cold, from the ice inside you soul.
Don't come back for me.
Don't come back at all" - Jar of Hearts

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 6:51:37 PM   
jesiul


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I have to say that there is a huge difference between experience and exposure. I have a Dom friend of mine who used to say he had some 20yrs experience in the life. What he really had was a few random D/s bedroom encounters and years of online role-playing as a Gorean Master.

He had never picked up a flogger, cane, or any instrument used in a real scene. The wide range of his experience was in a user room he had made and was ruler of. When he did go real life, the first slave who he “tricked” into living with him left in two months.

This was repeated until he found a, new to the life subbie, he had move from another state to live with him. Between his lack of real experience and her being new, was as you can guess a recipe for disaster.  

This so called experienced Master, thought that he could read about needles, fire, caning, even flogging then proceed.  With wild swinging of floggers into the kidney section, caning that broke skin, needles that caused infections, all on an inexperienced submissive who was willing to do anything for her Dom because she loved him caused harm.

The worst of all of this is that even though there was physical damage from his inexperience, the mental abuse was far worse. Having read a few books and played Master online he felt he had an understanding of how to be a Master in real life.

He ran on the theory that a slaves role was “To make his life easier,” and that he was not honor or duty bound to care for he in any way. Sadly she lasted three years and is currently thinking of leaving the life.

On-line exposure to this life is NOTHING like the real thing. One can not simply deem themselves Master and be one. Typing out and role-playing is fantasy and little more than a flight of the imagination.

If one reads a book about being a ruler of a kingdom, one is not a King.

~jesi~

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 6:56:01 PM   
laurell3


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quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Why does it matter?

I prefer to focus on the strength and dynamic of the relationship itself.  I really don't care how much "experience" a slave has before she enters my service.  What matters is experience serving me and adhering to my precepts and rules--and in that regard every slave I take on starts with the same level of experience (none whatsoever).



Yeah I agree, although I think online interactions can give you some idea of what you may be about initially, which isn't a bad thing.  Overall though except with regard to certain activities that are edgy and require some knowlege, I'm not sure experience is as important as being with someone you are compatible with and going from there.
l

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 7:16:48 PM   
DocRudy


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No.

-DR

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 7:50:15 PM   
twistedkytten


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For me.. in the beginning.. online offered a safe place for experimenting... for "trying on" different things .. however.. it is my humble opinion that absolutely none of it prepared me for what I live now.. how my flesh is compelled to the floor at the foot of the man that holds my soul in the palm of His hand.. nothing I experienced online readied me for all these little almost autonomic responses to just His simple presence, no words ever spoken expressed how incredibly I would burn to be His slave.
Please understand I am in no way meaning to discount those with online relationships, I am speaking strictly for myself when I say.. I could never go "back" having an online relationship/experiences no more than I could return to strictly vanilla.


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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 7:56:16 PM   
domiguy


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Online is for people who choose not to experience reality....They make a conscience choice to pursue what is not available in person...It is all rather pathetic as well as icky.

< Message edited by domiguy -- 10/1/2007 7:59:31 PM >


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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 8:24:55 PM   
mischievousone


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Online and RT are very different.  With RT you have to really know your partner.  I equate online as weaving a verbal fantasy for someone.  (to which they usually just end up jerking off to!)

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 8:28:42 PM   
xoxi


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann

And a former Marine to boot.

Let him know he's got some big boots to fill...

Stephan



zomg u r teh sexx0rz.  wil u b my internets bf plz i send nekkid pix

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 8:30:01 PM   
xoxi


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quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

It is rather absurd to talk about people writing essays....Or boast of your online relationships.....It would scream weasel and wanker....Can I learn something.....Sure....Should I boast about it? Probably not.   It would be comparable to touting my love making abilities from the information that I gleaned from reading penthouse forum....


My thoughts exactly...I was just kinda like "what should I *say* to this??"

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 8:47:31 PM   
LadyHugs


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Dear xoxi, Ladies and Gentlemen,
 
I am from a pre-computer age--my first text writing was on a Royal Manual typewriter and thought I died and went to heaven when I got my Smith-Carona electric typewriter, then upgraded to the 'ball' interchangable type style (before the use of font) and then the daisy wheel on the Brother Typewriter CE-58. 
 
In seeing people 'train' people on the Internet I was horrified, as some Dominants who were telling their slaves what to do to their bodies 'online' and some obediently did to themselves blindly was very dangerous.  I have had said persons finally convinced to go to their first real time experience and they were upset on how little they really knew and what danger they put others via over the Internet they could be putting another individual through 'blindly;' in the name of obedience and or submission.  I still see too many people talk the talk and cannot walk the walk, when it comes to 'online' interaction.  The so called 'expert' whip masters that talked a great technique--couldn't flog themselves out of a wet paper bag.
 
That said, I know the argument all to well about emotions, feelings, a sense of trust and such.  However, you can have a lot of emotional and mental aspects visited but, only until you have the physical experience that draws in the sense of hearing, seeing, tasting, feeling and more that is associated with the real time experiences; it is hard to go back with any seriousness to 'cyber-land' scenes.
 
There are people like Jack Rinella who are great writers--even very detailed and can picture things happen.  But, being a writer is not the same as actual participation in real life.  Great reading but, there is no replacement for personal interactions.
 
It is my personal belief that most people come into the lifestyle and or BDSM via the written word, through porn and or through other avenues like Swinging kinky sex and or chance experiences with others.  However, the Internet should be seen as a tool and not an answer to live through the Internet as to stay safe and not take a little bit of risk and find out beyond the written word and or movies what really is 'reality' vs. a written story unfolding live--as a wish or a fantasy.  Unfortunately, I have seen people really hurt emotionally and mentally by individuals who play games with other people's emotions, mental state of mind and or their physical well being. 
 
Just some thoughts.
 
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs
 
 
 

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RE: Is Internet Experience Seen As Equal to Real Life? - 10/1/2007 9:03:48 PM   
RRafe


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I count experience in the flesh as real in this.  Somehwere around 8, 9 years of that. The few years I goofed around on the net before then I just count as mental masturbation. If you use the net as a gateway-it's valid to getting to the meat world.

ONLY By itself?  It's jerking off with a computer.

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