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ORIGINAL: anopheles
Does anyone think that some women who fall into this category drift or shift towards the BDSM lifestyle in a search for the attention and acceptance that they may find difficult to find in the 'vanilla' world?

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I say this because I have seen very few peronal ads and profiles on various websites that have any of those phrases that are very common on vanilla dating sites, but in my experience are very rare on BDSM oriented sites, such as "height-weight proportionate" or "no fatties" or "must be good-looking" (whatever that means).

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Do most women come here to be accepted for their size? My guess is no more frequently than most men come here to get a girl to suck their d****.

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Yes I agree with you in principle and I also know that you and this topic will be flamed on LARGE.

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ORIGINAL: Kinkypupper
It is also very possable that many of the non-bbw types are very high commoditys and are well collared. If I had one I know I would be fairly protective of her.

It is also very possable that large people have a lower self esteem issues and tend to become more submissive and perhaps even tend to gravitate this direction in their search for a partner.

Are there legitamate reasons to be "large" yes for some but for many they eat for comfort or due to habit or because they were raised to "clean their plates". I am sorry but for 99.9% of all overweight people in this world I hate to tell you but it DOES come from someplace. Indeed thyroid conditions, diabetic and such can cause problems but "FAT" does not come from breathing.

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ORIGINAL: Kinkypupper

Yes I agree with you in principle and I also know that you and this topic will be flamed on LARGE.

It is also very possable that many of the non-bbw types are very high commoditys and are well collared. If I had one I know I would be fairly protective of her.

It is also very possable that large people have a lower self esteem issues and tend to become more submissive and perhaps even tend to gravitate this direction in their search for a partner.

I have some VERY good friends who are "large" and everyone of them wants to loose weight and are working at it and I congratulate them. Not just because I am one of many who tends to be attracted to smaller females but for health reasons. (Note: I also accept that a female I am currently VERY attracted to also weighs 165lbs so there is more to any relationship then just "size".)
Now to the question as to are the bbw's that are here are in large numbers because they have not gotten the control and guidence they seek and so become such and need control as to diet. probably.

Are there legitamate reasons to be "large" yes for some but for many they eat for comfort or due to habit or because they were raised to "clean their plates". I am sorry but for 99.9% of all overweight people in this world I hate to tell you but it DOES come from someplace. Indeed thyroid conditions, diabetic and such can cause problems but "FAT" does not come from breathing.

I also know there are some DOM types out there who want their submissive to eat and be large. I also know that everyone is different and there are indeed different body "sizes".

I also accept that I am overweight and i eat to much crap and need to eat better. ( I also eat one meal a day and only when I am hungary- but being alone the rum and coke with a box of chips at night is something I really need to avoid.)

Our technology has changed very rapidly but our physical selves has changed very little over the last few thousand years and our body wants to "store" the fat for the lean times when we cannot find sustanance.

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ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig

These sentiments sadden me because there are people who actually attach human value in inverse proportion to one's weight.
These sentiments sadden me because "large/fat/overweight/BBW" are such bad words that people have to hang their heads in shame and consider themselves less human and less lovable based on their size alone.

These sentiments sadden me because it adds considerable stress to the lives of so many, that instead of dealing with bigger world issues (of hunger, AIDS, ethnocentrism, racism, etc.) they have to concentrate on diet fads, gyms, anorexia, bulemia, depression related to ones looks, etc.

These sentiments sadden me because there are women who will read these and start to think that they need to explain themselves for their size, and apologize to those people who make them feel devalued because of their size.

That is all for now... Wish more women would read "Aint I a woman" and "Phenomenal woman" poems until it becomes their mantra. M

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ORIGINAL: Kinkypupper

Are there legitamate reasons to be "large" yes for some but for many they eat for comfort or due to habit or because they were raised to "clean their plates". I am sorry but for 99.9% of all overweight people in this world I hate to tell you but it DOES come from someplace. Indeed thyroid conditions, diabetic and such can cause problems but "FAT" does not come from breathing.

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ORIGINAL: Faibir

Perhaps for most of us as in my case size doesn't
matter sub/slave traits do. This may not work for
those that are into suspension. Size then would matter
i would I would think. For those that are just looking
for a trophy sub to show off at parties and munches
this could also apply . I know I will get email on
this one, but it is how I feel. Thank you for allowing
me this opportunity to express myself.

Faibir

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ORIGINAL: LadyJulieAnn
Plenty of larger submissives are collared, and you almost sound like you do not deem a larger submissive worthy of being collared and protected. I also know several smaller women/men who have low self-esteem amongst other issues that may cause them to gravitate towards a particular lifestyle (not necessarily BDSM).

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I am always curious as to why people have to go back to the size issue as if they are trying to figure out one of the greatest conundrums of the present day. It's also discouraging to still hear a lot of the tired ideas and excuses people put forth regarding why larger people are the way they are and the problems they must have.
Julie

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I don't think there's anything wrong with knowing what makes your d*** rise (sorry, crass, lol)... Anyone who gives you shit for it should get a life and more self respect.

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ORIGINAL: junecleaver

I would think this is just because they don't want to sound like an asshole by saying, "I don't date fat girls."

Or maybe since they have to look for a partner in a more limited pool of people, they've lowered their standards.

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ORIGINAL: anopheles

Ok, I know this one might get people stirred up, but here goes.....


Being new to the BDSM online scene, I have noticed that the majority of female submissives are what (even though I hate this term) Big Beautiful Women. Even though this is non-scientific, I would wager a guess that a statistically significant portion of female subbies are what the media and society would disparagingly deem "fat" or "overweight" or "heavy".

That leads me to my question. Does anyone think that some women who fall into this category drift or shift towards the BDSM lifestyle in a search for the attention and acceptance that they may find difficult to find in the 'vanilla' world? I say this because I have seen very few peronal ads and profiles on various websites that have any of those phrases that are very common on vanilla dating sites, but in my experience are very rare on BDSM oriented sites, such as "height-weight proportionate" or "no fatties" or "must be good-looking" (whatever that means).

Anyone wanna jump in with their opinions on this one?

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ORIGINAL: MstrHellsFury

well you asked for it ..you got it...I'm not surprised that the responses are more along the lines of attack rather than a real objective look at the question poised...


Fury