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Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 2:49:26 AM

MidnightMaiden

Posts: 142
Joined: 10/22/2007
Status: offline

Imagine your Master takes you to a swingers club, or a public dungeon or some similar venue where sex is relatively open, or at the very least done in semi-private rooms. His pleasure is to watch you submit to another person (either male or female). How would you feel about that? Is it a common practice for Masters/Doms to want to "show off and share" their subs/slaves?

It's not something I have done, but its a concept we have discussed, and I would love to hear others thoughts/experiences on this.

Post #: 1

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 2:57:24 AM

bandit25

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

Some like it, some don't. Not so much for me. Course it depends upon what you mean by submitting.

(in reply to MidnightMaiden)

Post #: 2

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 3:03:15 AM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

I've done it, when I was much younger, although the sharing was not bdsm, just sex and he was there at the time watching. It wasn't something I was really into personally when I met him, but it was something important to him so I decided to try it. I was nervous, but watching his face as it was happening, was awesome. I cannot tell you a thing about the guy he picked, I'm fairly certain I hardly looked at the man as the exchange really had nothing to do with him.
I'm not sure I would do it now (although I said that then too). This was a substantial ltr and something he was very interested in and of course, as my Dom, pleasing him was important to me.

(in reply to bandit25)

Post #: 3

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 5:22:47 AM

breatheasone

Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
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I haven't done it...i don't know if its common place or not. i am NOT interested in doing it...but its not my call.

_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
Mike posts in black font
candy posts in pink font

(in reply to MidnightMaiden)

Post #: 4

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 6:33:21 AM

IamJustMe2C

Posts: 94
Joined: 10/2/2007
Status: offline

I have never shared a slave nor have I ever wanted to. She is mine and the thought of leting someone else play, Top, fuck, what ever you want with her in any fashion is just not going to happen. People want to watch a demo we are doing thats fine. I love to go to public play parties and watch other people "play" but thats not sharing. If your going to share your slave/sub with someone after they have intrusted you with such a wonderful gift why not just open your house up and say ok any one want to come over and play just do it. A bottom has given there sacred trust to the Top and it is there job to protect them in all fashions.

_____________________________

Submission is a gift unlike any other. The one who can sculpt that gift in a graceful manner is a Master.

(in reply to breatheasone)

Post #: 5

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 6:36:44 AM

Celeste43

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline

We're totally monogamous, no sex, no play with others.

Plus, submission or not, it's my life on the line. Condoms don't protect you against everything. So unless the other man is willing to be celibate for several months with std scans before and after, too risky for me.

I'm a parent, I need to weigh fun and games against being able to take care of my family.

(in reply to IamJustMe2C)

Post #: 6

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 6:41:58 AM

Sabella

Posts: 265
Joined: 7/26/2005
Status: offline

Honestly Breathsasone, it IS your call. I know of no quicker way to ruin a perfectly good relationship by doing something you KNOW is totally against your values and desires but you do it anyhow. If he said "tonight you're gonna fuck a chicken my pet!" would it still be not up to you? And afterwards, while said chicken is laying there spent, grinning and smoking a cigarette and you look over at your Dom, what do you think will be running thru your head and heart?

OP it can be an exciting venue to enjoy. Take it slow. Talk about everything. Your concerns, thoughts, what part of the "fantasy" about it thrills you but you may be hesitant to really do, right off the bat or ever. We have been going to swinger's clubs for years yet have very very rarely ever played with others. The environment is very friendly and can be alot of fun JUST for the atmosphere and freedom there. You can watch, be watched or just talk with each other and enjoy the surroundings. You can dress much sexier (or not at all) in these types of environments easier than you can in any "vanilla" club. We actually went for several years and never saw the "play" area at all.

When we go it's our "date night" and we enjoy it tremendously. Someone else cooks dinner and cleans up afterwards. We dance and talk to old and new friends, cut up, snuggle on a couch. Sometimes we play there, sometimes we don't. Take it slow is my best suggestion, and remember (as he told me) that even if you cross a line you've never done before doesn't mean you have to keep crossing it. If you try something and you decide it's not for you don't do it again. I know lots of folks like us who go just for the party & only party together. It's all good and in our relationship it's good for us to get out in this type of venue.

If you have any questions feel free to PM me anytime, I'll be glad to talk to you about anything.

_____________________________

“The giant Grof was hit in one eye by a stone,
and that eye turned inward so that it looked into his mind and he died of what he saw there.”
From The Forgotten Beasts of Eld, by Patricia A. McKillip

(in reply to breatheasone)

Post #: 7

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 6:50:11 AM

breatheasone

Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline

quote:

Honestly Breathsasone, it IS your call. I know of no quicker way to ruin a perfectly good relationship by doing something you KNOW is totally against your values and desires but you do it anyhow. If he said "tonight you're gonna fuck a chicken my pet!" would it still be not up to you? And afterwards, while said chicken is laying there spent, grinning and smoking a cigarette and you look over at your Dom, what do you think will be running thru your head and heart?

Why would me being obedient ruin our relationship? My joy comes from being His, and doing what He wants of me....not from Him catering to my comfort level

_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
Mike posts in black font
candy posts in pink font

(in reply to Sabella)

Post #: 8

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 8:08:53 AM

slaveelle

Posts: 116
Joined: 9/28/2007
From: Australia
Status: offline

Master and i have also discussed this subject in length and both of us have come to a stage where we have agreed to not do this with others. What we share is sacred to us both, I have given myself to him and He to me and its not something we want to be destroyed. He has no qualms in allowing me to scene with others if he is with me but no sex will be involved.
Some do it some dont, but for us, its dont.

_____________________________

"No bond is stronger than that of the Beast"

(in reply to IamJustMe2C)

Post #: 9

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 8:12:12 AM

pseudopsychotic

Posts: 145
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline

quote:

Plus, submission or not, it's my life on the line. Condoms don't protect you against everything. So unless the other man is willing to be celibate for several months with std scans before and after, too risky for me.

I'm a parent, I need to weigh fun and games against being able to take care of my family.

Sing it loud.
I don't care who you are to me or to anyone else, I will not give away the farm to just anyone. The sad fact is, you don't know who could be a doormat for STDs...Sorry, not even my Sir is worth that hassle.
&& He damn well knows it.

_____________________________

Got a problem with me Solve it.
Think I'm trippin? Tie my shoe
Can't face me? Turn around

(in reply to breatheasone)

Post #: 10

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 9:10:20 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

FR...

i don't know if its common, but i would do it for myself if my Dominant would let me...cause i want to....and there are other dynamics at play in certain situations that the Dom i am talking to right now have discussed ... yes...i would be careful....and this would probably change after i had children....to pre-tested people...lol...

chelle

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to pseudopsychotic)

Post #: 11

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 10:10:27 AM

Shawn1066

Posts: 987
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

quote:

Honestly Breathsasone, it IS your call. I know of no quicker way to ruin a perfectly good relationship by doing something you KNOW is totally against your values and desires but you do it anyhow. If he said "tonight you're gonna fuck a chicken my pet!" would it still be not up to you? And afterwards, while said chicken is laying there spent, grinning and smoking a cigarette and you look over at your Dom, what do you think will be running thru your head and heart?

Why would me being obedient ruin our relationship? My joy comes from being His, and doing what He wants of me....not from Him catering to my comfort level

It's not that I don't respect your zeal...but blind obedience is just wrong in my opinion. Lets say he wanted to chop your finger off, would you still get joy from submitting to him and allowing him to do that? It's an extreme example, but not quite as extreme as him putting you into a situation where you could get AIDS and die just because he's doing what he wants of you.

Obedience, intelligent obedience, is good...blind obedience is bad. You can't serve somebody well if you're dead.

Again, just my two cents...

(in reply to breatheasone)

Post #: 12

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 10:20:41 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

Personally, it would make me miserable. I'm geared more towards women than men. Having sex with a random male stranger is a complete turn off for me. This is something that was negotiated when he collared me. He has no interest in sharing me with other men and I have no interest in being with other men.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Shawn1066)

Post #: 13

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 11:34:31 AM

toservez

Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline

All kink and power exchange things are not equal. To me this and bisexuality are two things that at their core you either have in you or not. So if something like being shared sexually is something you can either do or learn to do but only if it is in you. For most as you can tell from most replies when this topic comes up this is a hard limit and for most it is also usually an assumed hard limit.

Back to the OP, yes I have done that and in fact very direct where my previous owners were very active in the swinging community so I was shared often in that type of venue. In terms of my reaction to doing this, it is basically pure objectification on a very intense level. It is one thing to give your body and sexual parts to your beloved owner and another for him to exercise those rights by telling you who to have sex with. In the actual event it can be enjoyable, horrible and plain old boring and a nuisance. The first few times this happen to me I did require a lot of aftercare but as time went on not so much. The pleasure for me in doing this has never been about sex but knowing it pleases my Master and the intensity of the whole thing.

I am not dismissing the safety risks as others have mentioned but like usual whenever people discuss safety issues it is more about rationalizing in a moral way why they do not do something instead of just saying they cannot handle an open relationship like that is a negative when it is just different strokes for different folks. Like with all other things the word safety comes up it is discussed in a vacuum state. I can spend ten minutes interviewing everyone on this site and the people who strut out safety as the reason on this thread and find things they do in their life to be every bit as dangerous or even more so when talking about how long they might live as this one. Like all other risks in life, it is about understanding and accepting the ones you are taking and trying to minimalize them by being smart about it.

To defend the swinging community, people in it probably take safety of this nature more serious then nearly every single person out in the real world. So unless you are in a monogamous relationship and were a virgin at the time you met your forever another then most on here have exposed themselves to this risk.

Please do not infer I am dissing safety, I am not. I am just dissing people who use safety after the deciding they are monogamous and work their way backward to justify it. If people were really concerned about safety on the level they preach on things they do not do, cigarette, fast food, motorcycle industries would not exist and that is just off the top of my head. If people were truly concerned about safety we could talk about bondage risks, what electricity and the human body should not mix, how fast you drive, what car you drive, a person’s diet and practically every thing we do.

This topic is like most things in life and has an element of risk to it. There is no right or wrong but for most this is a risk they will not take and I do say good for them. But let’s put it into some perspective and not cast moral judgment on it. We all take risks, it is just which ones we choose and how we go about minimalizing those risks is what makes us different.

_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to MidnightMaiden)

Post #: 14

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 11:40:19 AM

Celeste43

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

quote:

Honestly Breathsasone, it IS your call. I know of no quicker way to ruin a perfectly good relationship by doing something you KNOW is totally against your values and desires but you do it anyhow. If he said "tonight you're gonna fuck a chicken my pet!" would it still be not up to you? And afterwards, while said chicken is laying there spent, grinning and smoking a cigarette and you look over at your Dom, what do you think will be running thru your head and heart?

Why would me being obedient ruin our relationship? My joy comes from being His, and doing what He wants of me....not from Him catering to my comfort level

Because forcing someone to break their moral values will ruin a relationship. If he brought home a runaway and demanded you have sex with her, wouldn't that disturb you? Or a German Shephard?

When forced to do things we are revolted by, the aftermath includes anger and resentment. And those emotions poison a relationship. Which is why for something as emotionally difficult as this, it is best if you feel positive about it to begin with.

(in reply to breatheasone)

Post #: 15

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 11:41:53 AM

colouredin

Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline

I think personally its something i would like to try at some point but its not a big issue, as im so new to everything im like a kid in a sweet shop and i want to try as much as i can. Its more though because i have a love of exhibitionism and that to me would be the ultimate.

Showing off your sub/slave though thats a common thing just as showing off your boyfriend/girlfriend is. If you are proud of who you are with you want to show them off. That doesn ness mean having sexual intercourse. As another poster said he doesnt mind people watching thats a form of showing off, as is asking them to get all dressed up and go to a resteraunt.

_____________________________

Resident Lime(y) Tart
There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

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(in reply to MidnightMaiden)

Post #: 16

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 11:44:58 AM

defiantbadgirl

Posts: 2988
Joined: 11/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MidnightMaiden

Imagine your Master takes you to a swingers club, or a public dungeon or some similar venue where sex is relatively open, or at the very least done in semi-private rooms. His pleasure is to watch you submit to another person (either male or female). How would you feel about that? Is it a common practice for Masters/Doms to want to "show off and share" their subs/slaves?

It's not something I have done, but its a concept we have discussed, and I would love to hear others thoughts/experiences on this.

I've never been into casual sex, but I might submit to non-sexual play with another male Dom. It would have to be a male though, as I am not bi.

_____________________________

Only in the United States is the health of the people secondary to making money. If this is what "capitalism" is about, I'll take socialism any day of the week.

Collared by MartinSpankalot May 13 2008

(in reply to MidnightMaiden)

Post #: 17

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 12:40:33 PM

littleone35

Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline

This wouold never happen for a few reasons one is we negoitated i would not be shared (not that he would share me anyway). It is not out kink and as tro the title "pleasing another to please your Master" seeing me with another would NOT please my Master.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)

Post #: 18

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 1:00:44 PM

wisteriaV

Posts: 438
Joined: 3/17/2005
Status: offline

Master failed sharing in Dom 101. He told me before he collared me he would never share me in a sexual manner with anyone else.

_____________________________

Every story has two sides , much like a coin and neither one is totally perfect.
If it doesn't float your boat, then don't get in the water~!

(in reply to littleone35)

Post #: 19

RE: Pleasing another to please your Master. - 10/24/2007 1:53:52 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MidnightMaiden

Imagine your Master takes you to a swingers club, or a public dungeon or some similar venue where sex is relatively open, or at the very least done in semi-private rooms. His pleasure is to watch you submit to another person (either male or female). How would you feel about that?

If he asked me to submit sexually to someone I would want to make sure they are free of STIs, since one of my rules is to take care of my health. If it was a woman, I'd probably ask her to clean up if she didn't smell too great down there but I don't see that big of a problem. It would be strange, but I can't fathom him doing it out of the blue without us talking about it. I don't know how I would feel about it because it would vary so greatly depending on who, when and where.

quote:

Is it a common practice for Masters/Doms to want to "show off and share" their subs/slaves?

For some it is. Not for us. Even though he has never done it before, I could see him "showing me off" by having me scene with someone else, but not having sex.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to MidnightMaiden)

Post #: 20

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