RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity



Message

Damocles809 -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (12/8/2007 8:09:31 PM)

What?  Your skin's supposed to fall out in patches...I must increase your prescription dosage. 

Doc, it hurts when I pee. 



slaverosebeauty -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (12/8/2007 8:11:59 PM)

Dr ~ of course, stop pulling your hair out.
 
pt ~ i can't get my rings off my fingers? how can i get them off without damaging my rings, i'm kinda fond of them



MissMagnolia -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (12/8/2007 8:13:57 PM)

Cut your fingers off.

I turn 98 soon. Should I be taking better care of my health?



slaverosebeauty -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (12/8/2007 8:14:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Damocles809

What?  Your skin's supposed to fall out in patches...I must increase your prescription dosage. 

Doc, it hurts when I pee. 



Dr ~ Stop going pee, let your kidneys and bladder explore then deal with the mess {see slave/sub thread for details}
 
pt ~ how do i get my head to stop hurting?



Mellissande -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (12/8/2007 8:14:50 PM)

Cut it off

My tongue is bleeding for some reason. Any help for me?
((Wow I'm way too slow lol))



desertdancer -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (12/8/2007 8:16:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: slaverosebeauty

quote:

ORIGINAL: Damocles809

What?  Your skin's supposed to fall out in patches...I must increase your prescription dosage. 

Doc, it hurts when I pee. 



Dr ~ Stop going pee, let your kidneys and bladder explore then deal with the mess {see slave/sub thread for details}
 
pt ~ how do i get my head to stop hurting?



Dr- You do a line of crack, then you wont care that your head hurts.

Pt-What can I do to stop the pain in my rear when my boyfriend shoves his whahoo up there?



Greylynn -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (12/8/2007 9:10:05 PM)

Have someone else smash your fingers with a hammer it won't stop the pain the the whawho but it sure will seem like it hurts less.

Doc my eyes hurt when I look at the sun.



SeraphinaKrow -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (12/9/2007 4:18:13 AM)

Doc- Keep staring, the suns rays will burn them right off your face for you.. if not I have sun resistant eye droppers that will burn your eyes off faster than the sun can...


Pt- I am having trouble bending over, my knees crack and my back feels like hell... what do I do?



SeraphinaKrow -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (12/9/2007 4:23:23 AM)


quote:

Doctor, doctor, I can see purple spots and green stripes in my hair. What should I do?



quote:

Take a pair of pliers to your nipples to adjust the color and contrast around you.




[sm=applause.gif][sm=applause.gif][sm=biggrin.gif][sm=biggrin.gif][sm=biggrin.gif][sm=biggrin.gif][sm=applause.gif][sm=applause.gif] that was a good one rubberpet





Mellissande -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (9/26/2008 12:14:01 AM)

I seem to have this horrible pain when I move my hand like this *bends hand at wrist*



TabrisMaceth -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (9/26/2008 1:02:52 AM)

Leeches will cure that.

-Tabris



Mellissande -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (9/26/2008 1:06:46 AM)

you seem to have no problems, A quick mercury bath should cure that!

my knee cracks everytime I move it!



MadAxeman -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (9/26/2008 3:36:17 AM)

my knee cracks everytime I move it!

With keyhole surgery an alternative sound effect can be installed, how about an airhorn? They're very popular.
 
The hair behind my knees seems to be falling out, this has stressed me so much that my scrotum is developing wrinkly skin. Is there any cream or surgical procedure to help me?



sirsholly -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (9/26/2008 3:42:32 AM)

a hot iron should smooth out the wrinkles, though be careful when positioning your balls on the ironing board. You don't want to injure yourself.

My new haircut makes me look like Joan Jett. WHat can i do to make my hair grow faster?



Mellissande -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (9/26/2008 3:50:32 AM)

manure in your shampoo of course, followed by an egg, oil and chickengrease concotion that must be left in for 12 hours every day

I can't seem to stop these salty water drops coming out of my eyes?! What is wrong with me?! *not crying, newly discovered allergies lol*



MadAxeman -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (9/26/2008 3:55:29 AM)

Bathe in whatever you are allergic to. The only way with these lil blighters is to show them who's boss.
My ear wax tastes terrible lately, do I need more sodium in my odour eaters?



sirsholly -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (9/26/2008 4:02:23 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadAxeman

Bathe in whatever you are allergic to. The only way with these lil blighters is to show them who's boss.
My ear wax tastes terrible lately, do I need more sodium in my odour eaters?


i would suggest pouring maple syrup in your ears to improve the taste of the ear wax. Or...a lil char-broiling might help. Pour B-B-Q sauce in your ears and insert a lit match.

my nose is itchy. What can i do?



Mellissande -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (9/26/2008 4:26:05 AM)

Cut the bugger off, What's it doing there in the first place?! Better yet, You could stick a Black cat in there, light it, bingo no more itchy nose

I seem to have lost feeling in my elbow, what should I do about it?



sirsholly -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (9/26/2008 4:29:59 AM)

wack it with a hammer. If that fails you need to sever all the nerves in the other elbow to make them equal. A door handle can do this with ease[:)]

i hate cutting my toenails. How do i stop them from growing?



Mellissande -> RE: Dr. and Patient... the bad advice game. (9/26/2008 4:35:18 AM)

Arsenic, a little in your tea should stop those pesky nails from growing

My tooth is Hurting badly and I taste blood How do I get the taste out of my mouth?



Page: <<   < prev  4 5 [6] 7 8   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
3.100586E-02