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Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 5:29:01 AM   
SubmissiveGael


Posts: 26
Joined: 7/1/2007
Status: offline 		Ever walked right up to a stranger and asked if they were into BDSM?!!

I was standing in a bar last night and a woman started talking to me. Being attractive and obviously full of confidance, I was immediately interested in replying! She asked me, within about 10 sentences, if I knew what BDSM was. I nearly fell over, it was so unexpected. Well I thought all my wishes were coming true at once, but she was married and merely making conversation ;(

Anyhoo, has anyone here actually done this? I know I would find it hard to approach someone with the topic if I didn't know already that ther were in the lifestyle.

S.G.
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 5:40:38 AM   
wisteriaV


Posts: 438
Joined: 3/17/2005
Status: offline 		Master always accompanies me to my doctors appointments. Nine times out of ten he will think of things to ask that I might forget to ask. One time when I was in a gyno. appointment, the doctor looked up and said your pussy lips are a bit bruised what happened..without blinking an eye I told him we are a M/s couple and I enjoy the BDSM play aspects..without missing a beat the doctor said thats cool and finished the exam. I am not ashamed of who and what I am. I make it a point to tell any medical professional that we have an alternative life choice, if they can't accept it, we find another medical professional.

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Every story has two sides , much like a coin and neither one is totally perfect.
If it doesn't float your boat, then don't get in the water~!

(in reply to SubmissiveGael)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 5:48:37 AM   
christine1


Posts: 6155
Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
Status: offline 		wysteria, i appreciate your input here.  i am currently looking for a new doctor...i was at an appt. a few weeks ago and i have some tiny scars on one of my breasts from some play a few years ago.   the doc asked me about them and i told her why they are there and she looked at me like i had just beamed myself down from mars, i left before she finished the exam.  i wonder if a male doctor would be more open minded...

(in reply to wisteriaV)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 5:57:45 AM   
shariah


Posts: 4
Joined: 12/19/2007
Status: offline 		No, I have never walked up to a stranger and asked that question but I have asked people I have gotten to know.   Some run, others admit they are involved, and still others are curious to know more.

I have actually found myself surprised with the number of people who are open minded about BDSM. 

In regards to medical professionals....you may be surprised how many Doctors attend munches and events.  (Nothing more hot about finding a Gyn that is also a Dom.  lol.

Shariah

(in reply to SubmissiveGael)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 6:07:51 AM   
taintedgypsy


Posts: 228
Joined: 2/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: shariah

... In regards to medical professionals....you may be surprised how many Doctors attend munches and events.  (Nothing more hot about finding a Gyn that is also a Dom.  lol.

Shariah


ooook so dreams really do come true lol

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Equal Opportunity Slut (Yeah ... best of both worlds lol)

warm smiles to all

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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 6:08:52 AM   
shariah


Posts: 4
Joined: 12/19/2007
Status: offline 		uh huh..LOL

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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 6:34:54 AM   
wisteriaV


Posts: 438
Joined: 3/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: christine1

wysteria, i appreciate your input here.  i am currently looking for a new doctor...i was at an appt. a few weeks ago and i have some tiny scars on one of my breasts from some play a few years ago.   the doc asked me about them and i told her why they are there and she looked at me like i had just beamed myself down from mars, i left before she finished the exam.  i wonder if a male doctor would be more open minded...

As to not hijack the thread I am e-mailing you a response.

_____________________________

Every story has two sides , much like a coin and neither one is totally perfect.
If it doesn't float your boat, then don't get in the water~!

(in reply to christine1)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 6:39:30 AM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Actually, I'd guess she was fuckin' with ya, because most people don't say "Do you know what BDSM is?" just to make conversation.  I guess you didn't get her number?

A good example of why it's hard to meet someone in a bar.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SubmissiveGael

I was standing in a bar last night and a woman started talking to me. Being attractive and obviously full of confidance, I was immediately interested in replying! She asked me, within about 10 sentences, if I knew what BDSM was. I nearly fell over, it was so unexpected. Well I thought all my wishes were coming true at once, but she was married and merely making conversation ;(

(in reply to SubmissiveGael)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 6:41:10 AM   
lockmeupplease


Posts: 202
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline 		I would need a really strong clue.  For example, I was in a bar chatting with a woman and spotted what to me appeared to be rope-marks on her wrist.  I forget exactly how I posed the question, but she responded that someone had gotten a little carried away tying her up and the conversation went from there...

(in reply to wisteriaV)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 7:12:09 AM   
Dominatist


Posts: 87
Joined: 7/18/2007
Status: offline 		I once had an obviously very attractive single female ask me if I was into BDSM on a sort of impromptu date. I said yes I know what it is and have a little experience not wanting to overdo it. She shook her head and winced as if it was something terrible.

Could not trust her from there on so I 'gave' her to the barternder.

(in reply to lockmeupplease)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 7:22:23 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		I wish there was a way to tell just by looking...when I am in the grocery store or post office and I see someone hot and we just make eye contact, I often wish I had a special telepathic power to speak to them and find out if they are into BDSM. So far, that power has not revealed itself....

(in reply to Dominatist)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 7:39:45 AM   
cbtok


Posts: 70
Joined: 3/2/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1
I wish there was a way to tell just by looking…


Depends on the venue, of course. Certain clubs are BDSM friendly even though they're not BDSM clubs per se. Additionally, one venue that has been a major BDSM gathering place is science fiction conventions. Before local BDSM clubs started holding conventions, the sci-fi gatherings have been the means to meet.

And nobody I have ever met at a science fiction convention ever questioned that approach.

I do have to admit, I tend to not ask in grocery stores.

But certain articles of clothing and certain ways of carrying one's self tend to indicate.

_____________________________

What if there were no hypothetical questions?

(in reply to sexyred1)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 7:40:07 AM   
BayouSub


Posts: 40
Joined: 4/2/2007
Status: offline
quote:

I wish there was a way to tell just by looking...when I am in the grocery store or post office and I see someone hot and we just make eye contact, I often wish I had a special telepathic power to speak to them and find out if they are into BDSM. So far, that power has not revealed itself....


I think those of us into BDSM need to develope a set of secret signals so we can identify each other in the vanilla world. 

(in reply to sexyred1)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 7:44:56 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cbtok

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1
I wish there was a way to tell just by looking…


Depends on the venue, of course. Certain clubs are BDSM friendly even though they're not BDSM clubs per se. Additionally, one venue that has been a major BDSM gathering place is science fiction conventions. Before local BDSM clubs started holding conventions, the sci-fi gatherings have been the means to meet.

And nobody I have ever met at a science fiction convention ever questioned that approach.

I do have to admit, I tend to not ask in grocery stores.

But certain articles of clothing and certain ways of carrying one's self tend to indicate.


Well, men do tend to hit on me in grocery stores, but they are usually married or vanilla, so something is wrong with that approach.

And what articles of clothing would one wear in a vanilla setting to indicate an interest in BDSM? I don't usually go to the post office or Target wearing my cuffs or collar, LOL and I carry myself always the same way, like a cool East Coast girl.

< Message edited by sexyred1 -- 12/29/2007 7:46:38 AM >

(in reply to cbtok)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 7:48:09 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

I don't usually go to the post office or Target wearing my cuffs or collar


I'm sorry you didn't get the memo regarding what the cool sublier than thou chicks wear when going out in public.






_____________________________

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(in reply to sexyred1)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 7:51:41 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		katy, around here, no one would probably blink and eye anyway if I wore that, they would think I was an older, sort of goth/ Jewish American Princess type!!! BDSM would not even cross anyone's jaded minds!!!

(in reply to KatyLied)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 7:53:02 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		I have seen two different women with locking collars in my community, and one with a locking anklet... I was tempted to ask them if they were submissives.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to SubmissiveGael)
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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 8:09:23 AM   
sweetstorm


Posts: 227
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

I have seen two different women with locking collars in my community, and one with a locking anklet... I was tempted to ask them if they were submissives.


If I were wearing my collar in public and someone asked me if I were a submissive, I would be so excited to find someone else in the community that understood! It'd be like throwing out a secret code that only those in the secret club understood. 

_____________________________

You don't need a parachute to skydive.

You need a parachute to skydive twice.

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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 8:10:07 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		no but i've had strangers/bands especially drummers commenting on my collars and chains

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...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

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RE: Approaching Strangers... - 12/29/2007 8:11:56 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

I have seen two different women with locking collars in my community, and one with a locking anklet... I was tempted to ask them if they were submissives.

collars are the latest fashion craze these in Chicago especially with the local news anchorwomen - i simply don't ask


_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 20
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