quote:

ORIGINAL: burningdesires47

as someone who is not in a D/s relationship right now, and even when I am, that dynamic may not always be there, the "protocols" are what gets me going. I am frequently in charge of the productivity of others or at least myself, and a swift reminder of my expected behavior as a sub is a lot more effective than slowly slipping into place. When he grabs my hair and forces my head back, pressing his lips to mine just a LITTLE too hard, I always gasp, try to pull away just the tiniest bit, then melt into a squishy submissive ball of happy goo. It's not anything that was a conscious decision, and in fact I don't think it's anything that I've ever even discussed with anyone before just now, I guess it's just something that works for me (and it's not exactly a hard button to find or push... even in public, that orgasm the first time it's done to me by someone I'm interested in is truly unmistakable).

Incidentally, calling someone Sir or Mistress would be considered a protocol, and one of my faves. It's very hard for me to answer to my name when in a submissive mood, without making me feel.... well, icky is the only word I can come up with. And calling someone by their name when in the same mood, especially someone with whom I am not ALWAYS their sub, can totally kill any possibility of me submitting without swift and severe remedy of the situation (by which I mean, when I decide to submit to someone, I make it explicit that they cannot ask me to call them by their name or it will simply not work--and they need to pick a pet name for me, or any number of pet names, just as long as they don't call me my given name, I'm fine. Which is partially why I have a scene name to begin with).

quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists

I love protocols that are meaningful for our relationship and I enjoy watching the protocols of other couples.  We have many and I can't think of any that I do not like.  However, there are rare times when it is frustrating to follow them. 

If I had to list one as a favorite it would be the use of hand signals to communicate with him.  We have 5 or 6 different hand signals that we use and they are very unobtrusive and not usually noticed by others. 

Knight's Kyra

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ORIGINAL: Justme696
Kinda like the baseball ones? In what situations do you use them?

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ORIGINAL: takenbyjohnr07

This is such a lovely thread. Thank you for thinking of it. i'm enjoying every response and it is so great how you  warmly validate everyone's posts

quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696
Kinda like the baseball ones? In what situations do you use them?

They are used in all situations when one of the following things needs to be communicated:  (the first two are used by him and the others are used by Alandra and me)

Get him a drink (though we are allowed to use this in play to ask for a drink)
Get ready to leave
May I give information
May I ask a question
May I express an opinion
May I be excused

They are signals that were made up by him years ago and are used unless we are given the instruction to speak freely. 

edited to add, not nearly as obvious as the sports signals.  Only one hand is needed and it is in a very discreet position so that he can see it out of the corner of his eye.  Most people do not even see that we are doing it.

Knight's Kyra

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ORIGINAL: geishagurl
Dominates, what are some protocals you enjoy seeing your submissive do, if you also do not mind sharing?

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ORIGINAL: Arrrchibald

Not a fan of protocols for their own sake.

I much prefer a sub who knows what I like and then surprises me. 

Planning a around it feels a lot less romantic. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arrrchibald

Not a fan of protocols for their own sake.

I much prefer a sub who knows what I like and then surprises me. 

Planning a around it feels a lot less romantic. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: geishagurl


How about a little of both?  Surely there are some things that you would enjoy as the norm.  Perhaps having your coffee/tea ready each morning for you?  Taking your shoes off for you each evening and slipping on more comfortible house shoes? Fixing you a refreshing drink after you come home from a hard day's work?  Perhaps having a warm towel handed to you after you climb out of the shower? Yes, of course it means much more coming from the heart, but the heart is where it comes from in the first place or she/he would not be doing these little things for you in the first place. For the submissive, it is romantic either way.  :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

that is lovely and efficient

thank you for sharing