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RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 5:48:24 PM   
dcnovice


Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
Status: offline 		<fast reply>

I think I shall start styling myself a BNSBBCQWM.

_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

(in reply to Pulpsmack)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 5:51:33 PM   
fluffyswitch


Posts: 1108
Joined: 9/29/2007
From: Buffalo
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Pulpsmack

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

Are you serious Caleigh?  You think fat chicks should only call themselves BBW if they have those three qualities??

Cali



Do you really think they should call themselves BBW if they have none of those qualities? I am not averse to the shedding labels movement (good luck implementing that), but if one is going to use the term to define herself, then she should know what it means and live up to its meaning before using it.


i think that the problem is that you're saying that's your definition of the term but it may vary from individual to individual, so therefore she could very well 'know what it means' and be living 'up to its meaning before using it'. just because it doesn't match your exact definition doesn't make it any less appropriate to use it. i think it may be a little harsh to just flat out call someone dishonest because they don't use the same definition of the term that you do. the thing with representation is that you're representing YOURSELF as YOU see it or choose to state it, not as someone else may have told you say it.

i've been called anything from thin to a blimp---which is right? if i were to say that i'm average, if i see myself as such, does that make me dishonest? or if i identified as a bbw because that's how i saw myself would i be dishonest? no. because that's how i choose to represent myself. you don't have to like it. but is it perpetuating misinformation? not if it it falls into my personal image of myself. it would be if i made it up for my profile, but if i see myself as such it's not.

that sounds really flame-ish (my response) to me but whatever.

< Message edited by fluffyswitch -- 1/17/2008 5:52:38 PM >

(in reply to Pulpsmack)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 6:17:58 PM   
Pulpsmack


Posts: 394
Joined: 4/15/2004
From: Louisiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fluffyswitch

i think that the problem is that you're saying that's your definition of the term but it may vary from individual to individual, so therefore she could very well 'know what it means' and be living 'up to its meaning before using it'. just because it doesn't match your exact definition doesn't make it any less appropriate to use it. i think it may be a little harsh to just flat out call someone dishonest because they don't use the same definition of the term that you do. the thing with representation is that you're representing YOURSELF as YOU see it or choose to state it, not as someone else may have told you say it.

i've been called anything from thin to a blimp---which is right? if i were to say that i'm average, if i see myself as such, does that make me dishonest? or if i identified as a bbw because that's how i saw myself would i be dishonest? no. because that's how i choose to represent myself. you don't have to like it. but is it perpetuating misinformation? not if it it falls into my personal image of myself. it would be if i made it up for my profile, but if i see myself as such it's not.

that sounds really flame-ish (my response) to me but whatever.


Therein lies the problem... objectivity v. subjectivity. Beauty is indeed a subjective term, but terminology without any objectivity is nonsensical. There is no point communicating if people cannot understand what each other is saying. I may think I am a Dom. I may in fact be a Dom. I can say that I believe I am a Dom, or that I have dominant qualities. But when I step forth, place the hat on my head, and proclaim to all who care to read "I AM DOM", then I had better be preparred to deliver. Granted, I may not represent the archetypical "Dom" to person A, but we are not talking slight variance here (at least I wasn't). We make no apologies for those who abuse/misuse certain terms here. I believe this is one of those terms that should be regarded with the same footprint of objectivity.

This may be too black and white for certain sensibilities. So be it. The shades of grey only remain useful when you can distinguish them from the polar opposites. When everything is an unidentifiable mass there is no longer any utility in the term. So long as the term exists and has currency, it should have some standard. Otherwise it should no longer have any currency (which I believe is the present case) and it should be dispensed with.

(in reply to fluffyswitch)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 6:25:29 PM   
fluffyswitch


Posts: 1108
Joined: 9/29/2007
From: Buffalo
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Pulpsmack

quote:

ORIGINAL: fluffyswitch

i think that the problem is that you're saying that's your definition of the term but it may vary from individual to individual, so therefore she could very well 'know what it means' and be living 'up to its meaning before using it'. just because it doesn't match your exact definition doesn't make it any less appropriate to use it. i think it may be a little harsh to just flat out call someone dishonest because they don't use the same definition of the term that you do. the thing with representation is that you're representing YOURSELF as YOU see it or choose to state it, not as someone else may have told you say it.

i've been called anything from thin to a blimp---which is right? if i were to say that i'm average, if i see myself as such, does that make me dishonest? or if i identified as a bbw because that's how i saw myself would i be dishonest? no. because that's how i choose to represent myself. you don't have to like it. but is it perpetuating misinformation? not if it it falls into my personal image of myself. it would be if i made it up for my profile, but if i see myself as such it's not.

that sounds really flame-ish (my response) to me but whatever.


Therein lies the problem... objectivity v. subjectivity. Beauty is indeed a subjective term, but terminology without any objectivity is nonsensical. There is no point communicating if people cannot understand what each other is saying. I may think I am a Dom. I may in fact be a Dom. I can say that I believe I am a Dom, or that I have dominant qualities. But when I step forth, place the hat on my head, and proclaim to all who care to read "I AM DOM", then I had better be preparred to deliver. Granted, I may not represent the archetypical "Dom" to person A, but we are not talking slight variance here (at least I wasn't). We make no apologies for those who abuse/misuse certain terms here. I believe this is one of those terms that should be regarded with the same footprint of objectivity.

This may be too black and white for certain sensibilities. So be it. The shades of grey only remain useful when you can distinguish them from the polar opposites. When everything is an unidentifiable mass there is no longer any utility in the term. So long as the term exists and has currency, it should have some standard. Otherwise it should no longer have any currency (which I believe is the present case) and it should be dispensed with.


i agree. but my question is, who defined that term? you have a definition of that term, and no offense meant, but you yourself are outside of that community. you are working off of your own subjectivity which in and off itself places it within a grey area. the issue with representation, or so i was just taught by my theory professor when i had my semiotics lecture this afternoon, is that it is in and of itself a grey area--it is ALL relative.

(in reply to Pulpsmack)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 6:27:49 PM   
agoodgirl4Daddy


Posts: 336
Joined: 10/25/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Pulpsmack

Therein lies the problem... objectivity v. subjectivity. Beauty is indeed a subjective term, but terminology without any objectivity is nonsensical. There is no point communicating if people cannot understand what each other is saying. I may think I am a Dom. I may in fact be a Dom. I can say that I believe I am a Dom, or that I have dominant qualities. But when I step forth, place the hat on my head, and proclaim to all who care to read "I AM DOM", then I had better be preparred to deliver. Granted, I may not represent the archetypical "Dom" to person A, but we are not talking slight variance here (at least I wasn't). We make no apologies for those who abuse/misuse certain terms here. I believe this is one of those terms that should be regarded with the same footprint of objectivity.

This may be too black and white for certain sensibilities. So be it. The shades of grey only remain useful when you can distinguish them from the polar opposites. When everything is an unidentifiable mass there is no longer any utility in the term. So long as the term exists and has currency, it should have some standard. Otherwise it should no longer have any currency (which I believe is the present case) and it should be dispensed with.



What is beautiful to you may not be beautiful to another.

What is an unappetizing personality to you may be very appetitizing to another.

You telling ME whether i can call myself a BBW or not based upon your so-called rules makes no sense.  It's the identifier that i choose, based upon the way i see myself and the way i understand the term.  You can call me whatever you choose...as long as you don't call me "late for dinner".  lol   Bottom line for me is that potential Daddies know that i'm a big beautiful girl...hey..perhaps i'll start calling myself a BBG!! 

< Message edited by agoodgirl4Daddy -- 1/17/2008 6:29:29 PM >

_____________________________

~We do not see things as they are - we see them as we are.~ Anais Nin

(in reply to Pulpsmack)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 6:56:26 PM   
DommeofFantasies


Posts: 12
Joined: 6/21/2007
Status: offline 		I have found that many women, who are heavy-set, fat, curvy, etc., will not use the term BBW (Big Beautiful Woman) because somebody has made a point to make BBW synonymous with obese, fat ass, and other negative terms.  The bottom-line is every woman or man is capable of great beauty, no matter his or her size.  To state a lady is not a BBW because she does not adhere to my definition or another's in regards to beauty is wrong.

This thread start out in two part--what attract you to BBW and any other slave or submissive.

I am a proud BBW and I know why men and women are attracted to me.  My size may be the initial attraction but my personality seals the deal.

In regards to what attracts me to a slave--common interest, a desire to meet my needs, and personality.

What are Dom/mes looking for in a slave/sub?  If you are a slave/sub, what attracted your Master/Mistress to you?

(in reply to Pulpsmack)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 7:11:49 PM   
winterlight


Posts: 1319
Joined: 2/18/2006
Status: offline 		BBW= Big Bouncy Woman  < that describes me... LOL

(in reply to Pulpsmack)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 7:13:51 PM   
winterlight


Posts: 1319
Joined: 2/18/2006
Status: offline 		ok, let me rephrase what makes a sub/slave interesting to U/u?

(in reply to Pulpsmack)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 7:27:30 PM   
MistressNoName


Posts: 664
Joined: 10/26/2006
Status: offline 		It's just amazing how many, many times this subject continually comes up. AMAZING! Just goes to show how incredibly obsessed we are with this subject. It's so been said a million times over. No one person is qualified to define what beauty is for all of us. Each individual decides for themselves.

Now, can we maybe talk about how ugly (physically and personality-wise) some thin ppl are? Or is there just no interest in beating that dead horse?


MNN,

BBW Extraordinaire

_____________________________

aka Ms Petal - Check Me out on the Web.

(in reply to winterlight)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 7:34:31 PM   
MistressPav


Posts: 350
Joined: 11/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressNoName

It's just amazing how many, many times this subject continually comes up. AMAZING! Just goes to show how incredibly obsessed we are with this subject. It's so been said a million times over. No one person is qualified to define what beauty is for all of us. Each individual decides for themselves.

Now, can we maybe talk about how ugly (physically and personality-wise) some thin ppl are? Or is there just no interest in beating that dead horse?


MNN,

BBW Extraordinaire



It never ceases to amaze me how many females continute to get pissed off by this topic.  Does the truth hurt? 




_____________________________

Proud Owner of Zubi
(my boy "ToyZ")
Claimed & Collared 9magick#2008

"An it harm none, unless they deserve it, do what ye will." --Scorpio Creed

A- Rh-




(in reply to MistressNoName)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 7:38:01 PM   
MistressNoName


Posts: 664
Joined: 10/26/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressPav

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressNoName

It's just amazing how many, many times this subject continually comes up. AMAZING! Just goes to show how incredibly obsessed we are with this subject. It's so been said a million times over. No one person is qualified to define what beauty is for all of us. Each individual decides for themselves.

Now, can we maybe talk about how ugly (physically and personality-wise) some thin ppl are? Or is there just no interest in beating that dead horse?


MNN,

BBW Extraordinaire



It never ceases to amaze me how many females continute to get pissed off by this topic. Does the truth hurt?





Sweetheart, please! You crack me up!


_____________________________

aka Ms Petal - Check Me out on the Web.

(in reply to MistressPav)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 7:41:06 PM   
MistressPav


Posts: 350
Joined: 11/14/2007
Status: offline 		Hey, all I have to go on is what people write.  I can't see facial expressions   =)
unless, of course, it's a web cam deal going on.

Chemistry is what does it for me....be they fat, skinny or somewhere in between.  Chemistry can happen between people of any body type.




_____________________________

Proud Owner of Zubi
(my boy "ToyZ")
Claimed & Collared 9magick#2008

"An it harm none, unless they deserve it, do what ye will." --Scorpio Creed

A- Rh-




(in reply to MistressNoName)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 7:42:08 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline 		I read your profile, WL, and was curious as to why you believe people on this site do not like bigger gals.  Perhaps you have not had success with making a match on here and believe it to be because of how much you weigh?  Not sure.  I saw that you are losing weight for yourself, and that's a good thing.  Don't do it for someone else. 

I can say that, for myself, I have not had a problem making friends in the lifestyle (as I am not looking for a partner bc I already have one, and he's a BHM) as a result of what I weigh.  I have been propositioned, flirted with, complimented, and shown lots of sweet affection in the nilla world, and here, among the "twisted."  I think that much of what Pulpsmack writes has a bit of truth in it.  I think that anyone who is smart, funny, kind, has a great life story to tell, has a good sense of timing when telling a joke, etc. has a great chance of keeping my attention.  The outside looking yummy can come a lot from the inside being so intriguing.  Eye candy only lasts for so long when you have nothing else to offer.  I like people to have depth and intrigue to them.

As for the perceived "definition" of BBW, I guess that is subjective.  Big = whatever big means to someone (overweight, overtall, what-have-you); Beautiful = to me, it means "pleasing to the eyes" (takes care of herself, presents and carries herself well, is articulate, well-read, intelligent, and has a great sense of humor...  these things make someone beautiful to me, and to Daddy, for that matter); and Woman = (well, I'm not getting into the whole what makes a woman debate) but to me, it's a woman, female.  My definition of a BBW is a pretty, intelligent, well-put-together in her total look, carries herself with pride, and oozes self-confidence, girlie girl.  That's my definition and it is Daddy's as well.  Other people can define BBW for themselves.

According to the definition I have above, I qualify as a BBW.  I'm nearly 6' tall, am "plush" sized (wink), as I have a nice set of ample bosoms that are offset by the same size "bootious-maximus," and a smaller waist.  (You can have an hour-glass shape and still be a bigger gal.)  I have a great sense of humor, a big heart, am intelligent, can carry a conversation with anyone I meet, and I think I have a very pretty face, with the rest of the bodily package following a close second.  (lol...)  I've been small, medium, large, and "squishy" (as Thing 2 likes to call my curves), and at no time have I ever had a problem meeting partners, friends, etc.  I think what attracts a lot of people and keeps them attracted, is the "whole package." 

Just me, the rest may see it differently.

~ DRH (complete with overflowing "rack" and "junk in my trunk" and a damn fun personality...  I know so, Daddy told me, LOL...)  

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to winterlight)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 7:42:33 PM   
Curious29


Posts: 6
Joined: 10/11/2007
Status: offline 		I totally agree!! bravo!!

(in reply to DommeofFantasies)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 7:56:23 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent
P.S. I gather from these boards that a few of you American women are averse to receiving oral..............that can't happen.


i am not against receiving oral...i am against receiving boring oral....and i have not met too many men who could make oral not boring for me...so instead of having to repeat "you're not going to break it....bite it...harder...i can't feel that..." which totally defeats the mindset i like durring sex - without control - i just say i don't like oral....

just to clear up the subject concerning this American woman....

P.S. i have all of your other qualifications, and you're hot (i am not above objectifying men either) but you seem to be unwilling to jump the pond...damn....


_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to NorthernGent)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 8:04:22 PM   
winterlight


Posts: 1319
Joined: 2/18/2006
Status: offline 		no i haven't met any on here that like BBW's. One has told me He does but that is it. I just wondered...what people looked for...

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 8:09:15 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: winterlight

no i haven't met any on here that like BBW's. One has told me He does but that is it. I just wondered...what people looked for...


there are lots that do...but we might have already taken them all...whoops?


_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to winterlight)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 8:09:33 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: winterlight

no i haven't met any on here that like BBW's. One has told me He does but that is it. I just wondered...what people looked for...


They are here, WL...  just dig a little deeper. 

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to winterlight)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 8:11:48 PM   
daddyncherry


Posts: 656
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fluffyswitch


i agree. but my question is, who defined that term?



i'm not totally sure, but i do recall back in the 80's there was a magazine called BBW, a friend of mine won a contest in it and became a plus sized model for Ford  Models, so maybe they coined the term as a much needed backlash to the other side of the modeling coin.

Beauty is defintely in the eye of the beholder, so it is hard to pin point exactly what that means...but i do think, just like other modeling has/had it's definite "type"....i think originally BBW was meant to be something quite specific.....Just like petite modeling meant you had to be under 5'4" or else you weren't petite...Waif meant something...and so on.

But i imagine that that was the original concept of the word, the fact that it has been embraced more widely, IMO is a good thing....Personally i'd much rather see a woman "owning" it....than being nasty and bitter..nasty and bitter instantly makes any physical beauty marred and ruined.

Just my opinion.


_____________________________

Hugs,
cherry

Walking through life, and fear with a smile on my face.
Walking directly through the eye of the hurricane...and through to the other side..without fear....realizing everything will be okay. :)

being obedient 1day at a time

(in reply to fluffyswitch)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: What attracts U/u to a BBW or any sub/slave - 1/17/2008 8:12:37 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline 		DC, I must know.  What does this stand for?  BNSBBCQWM 
 
I'm waiting... taps foot... 

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to Daddysredhead)
Profile   Post #: 40
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