quote:

I was fat kid up until about age 22. I was clinically obese (I had a bodyfat % around 30%) and desperate to get help. I lost enough weight to get into a Marine Corps Officer's ascension program called "The Platoon Leader's Course" (PLC) and succesfully (barely) completed the first summer session.

I got kicked out the next year for being a "fatbody." I had gained it all back - I will never in my life forget standing in a passageway at the mainside hospital at Quantico in my skivvies, rolls of fat hanging over the side of the waist band while a major and two captains screamed at me, told me what a disgusting failure I was, that I should kill myself and remove my genes from the pool.

I know that my drive to shape my body and pursue the level this level of phsycial power is in part a reaction to that early self-image.

Faramir

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Actually I have noticed and asked the question myself among friends. I perceive a much higher percentage of the female population in the scene to be very overweight versus the percentage of the female population in general. I have asked myself why. I don't have any clear answers.

I also ask the same thing about smokers, I perceive a much higher percentage of people in the scene to be smokers versus the percentage of smokers in general. I have asked myself why this might be. I don't have any clear answers.

I also am amused how any question on weight invariably turns into "We're great people, fat doesn't matter!" dogma.

Emeraldslave2

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I was once told that many BBW women weren't actually submissive but couldn't find any other way to get attention from men than by pretending an interest in BDSM, and that by offering kinky sex or other perversities they could thereby gain some level of attention from a male. (A BBW woman told me this)

DeepWaters

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You gotta be kidding me....

I never had any problem getting laid, nor have I ever had any problem gaining male attention. This is the most bogus theory I've ever heard. Do some woman, thin or fat mistake their own demons for this lifestyle? Yes. Can some broad who happens to be fat catagorize all other fat women into some misguided example of kink gone wrong? I should sincerely hope not.

If my interest in BDSM is pretend, as a means to get attention by offering perverted acts to men who would otherwise be uninterested, then my Sir's gonna punish the shit out of me when he finds out....

Lily

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Seeing that I have the reputation in the past, when I was single, being see at a variety of functions with various women, some of whom were catwalk or Photographic Models and at other times with the most outstanding BBW, I fail to see the hoorah…. A person, male or female, is beautiful within themselves. the most beautiful BBW I have known was Plain Jane to look at but sheesh what a mind and personality…. She was a stunner. For those who think that BBW cant get laid.. I’ll tell you up front that 99% of the models I’ve dated and laid were so self absorbed that they were useless in bed.. Bloody hell until my knee got screwed and I was laid up from normal physical exercise I was well build including a 6 pack and played my last game of American Football at the age of 47. Now I have a belly and some additional padding (Am working on a get healthy program for my own benefit), so who am I toss the odd stone at people for how they look…

IronBear

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Ok, if anything, my original post got a lot of response. It sure seems to strike a nerve with a lot of people, and I find all your replies interesting (even the insulting ones). In response:
1. I didn't say "all" BBW's, I said "many". Those of you who accuse me of generalizing, you should have read more carefully.
2. Even the title of the post says "I wonder". Those of you who accuse me of attacking BBW's, It's a MUSING, people.
3. I also said I "suspect". This means I consider my statement to be a POSSIBILITY.
4. The last part clearly states a PREFERENCE about one's SECURITY, and includes "no matter what their body-type".
It seems that SOME people only read what they want to read. I knew this post would catch a lot of flak, and if I was concerned about pleasing everyone I'd go hide in the corner and keep my mouth shut. It doesn't matter what one says, there's always going to be people who disagree or even get offended.
Here's a hypothetical question:
If you rubbed the magic lamp and the genie granted you one wish, and your choices were:
A. To have a slim, fit body
B. To remove all prejudice or stigma towards overweight people worldwide
Which would you choose? Be honest, now! (sorry, whirled peas not included in wish list :)

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then again alot of submissives were also abused.....

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Fawne how's this I'll give you my boobs, LOL I'm a DD and I actually hate them they get in the way of everything.

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ORIGINAL: GddssBella

Greetings all!


Yes, I'm back, for the moment.

I can't help myself.... I just have to wonder about the mental condition of someone that feels the desperate need to humiliate females in order to feel dominant. I personally have no problem employing in it a scene to spice up the moment. As a way of life or relationship? ARE YOU ON DRUGS?? How the heck can anyone respect their submissive if they're constantly treating them worse than their pet? (Garnered from your own profile.) Which also reminds me; perhaps interested parties should notify the A.S.P.C.A about your dubious practices?!?

Size is irrelevant in regards to submission, dominance, self esteem, image, courtesy, intelligence, what have you. The biggest sexual organ is right between the ears. After perusing the O.P.'s profile and the posts in this forum, I can only conclude I'm glad I'm a domme and don't reside anywhere near Missouri. Maybe you'd have more luck in securing a worthy submissive if you decided to shave off the 70's throwback beard and conducted yourself with a tad more civility here.....

To interested peeps, the success rate to date? 26 lbs and still losing! (Health concerns mainly, vanity aside.)


Stay safe, play nice, & share your toys w/ others.....





Bella

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ORIGINAL: pinkpleasures
Since there is no place on one's profile to indicate "smoker" i wonder how you arrived at the conclusion that BDSM'ers smoke more than vanilla ppl.

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Likewise, i wonder how you arrived at the conclusion that more BDSM'ers are overweight...there appears to be no statistical basis for your assertions.

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i think it's a bit of generalising and not terribly constructive. i have met my share of HNG's but few Men with a self-esteem problem tied to their weight, etc. A dominant Man does not cease to have the character of a dominant Man due to losing hair, putting on weight, etc. My understanding is it is a feeling known almost from childhood. It is immutable. The same as to submissives. Some feelings do not change as we gain weight...not about submission...anymore than they'd change as we stopped smoking.

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You can say what you want about my profile, my name or even my beard, because frankly, your opinion doesn't mean squat to me

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BeMyDogBitch, with every next post you write here you just lessen your chances to find any selfrespectful females - which I suppose was your intention when you made a profile on CM in first place. You havent made a profile just to fight with people have you?

So, I would stop being all bratty and defensive and ask myself why in fact all those people here found your original post insulting and why are reactions on your posts and on you so negative.

Being dominant doesnt mean you have to be insolent to everyone who disagrees with you, or thinking a disagreement is sort of personal attack at you.
I would benevolently suggest that you think twice and count to ten before writing furthermore.

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KC692
I am comfortable in my skin(very comfortable, smiles). Everyone has the right to their opinion, no matter how misguided or not it is. Do I give a rat's ass what the OP or anyone else thinks of me, body-size wise, psychologically, or otherwise? No. I only care about those that are close to me, and that is only to certain extents, which is why they care as they do. I don't know about the rest of you, but I will not let someone whose values I don't know or care about induce me to dwell on their perceptions

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ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily

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then again alot of submissives were also abused.....

Really??? Data check. Where did you find this please.

Lily

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I am comfortable in my skin(very comfortable, smiles). Everyone has the right to their opinion, no matter how misguided or not it is. Do I give a rat's ass what the OP or anyone else thinks of me, body-size wise, psychologically, or otherwise? No. I only care about those that are close to me, and that is only to certain extents, which is why they care as they do. I don't know about the rest of you, but I will not let someone whose values I don't know or care about induce me to dwell on their perceptions...

kc692