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RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/8/2008 4:20:36 PM   
Leatherist


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quote:

ORIGINAL: kuriousreturns

Are the ability and desire for independant thought and decision-making admirable traits in a submissive?


It is, if you dislike changing thier diapers.

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Profile   Post #: 41
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/8/2008 11:46:51 PM   
SimplyMichael


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h

< Message edited by SimplyMichael -- 2/8/2008 11:47:08 PM >

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RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/8/2008 11:55:04 PM   
SimplyMichael


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quote:

ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch

quote:

ORIGINAL: kuriousreturns

Are the ability and desire for independant thought and decision-making admirable traits in a submissive?


anything less is unacceptable.


Exactly

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 12:09:48 AM   
breatheasone


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quote:

ORIGINAL: greyangelus

quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

quote:

Now, the ability to suspend those qualities for a limited period of time, thats something to look for...

Really?....how come?



Scenes that require it (that micromanagement fetish thread that was floating around is a great example).  

Seen from different point, it could be argued that anyone identifing as submissive suspends those qualities on a regular basis; pretty much every time thier dom makes a decision for them.  They conciously ignore what their own thought and decision making abilities tell them in favor of the doms thought and decision making abilities.  Arguably, it is the desire to suspend those qualities (and the consequences and pressures of those qualities) is what makes and enables a submissive to be submissive.

Suspending those qualtities does not equate with a lack of those qualities, however.  Without those qualities in the first place, a sub would never seek out a dom who is a compatible fit.  Reason being the desire to suspend must also be balanced against the assurance that when those qualities are suspended, that the person who is now making their decisions for them will do so in their best interests.

I guess I feel like I "suspend" nothing to be submissive to my Master.... Its a choice I made. I doubt He would be happy with me if I stopped being who I am for any length of time.


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Profile   Post #: 44
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 12:27:26 AM   
ProlificNeeds


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I'd never be able to live with myself if I had to pretend to be stupid. I think independantly no matter what, my brain has no off switch.

(in reply to breatheasone)
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RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 2:35:47 AM   
celticlord2112


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quote:

ORIGINAL: kuriousreturns
i've heard a variety of answers from people on different sites that i visit. S/some have said that a submissive should have and use the ability to think and make decisions on her own. O/others have said that a submissive should always do exactly what she is told by her Dominant.


Submission is obedience. Obedience is surrender. Surrender is a choice. Choice requires thought.

A woman cannot be my slave until she freely chooses to surrender all that she is into my keeping. She must make that choice in every instant of every day.

Without the ability to choose, where can there be submission?

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Profile   Post #: 46
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 3:11:16 AM   
Justme696


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When I had my first kajira...I had a huge problem..that she didn't do a thing with out me saying it. She had lived as 24/7 kajira.
Took me 1 year till she started to think for herself. Almost wrecked the relation. It is needed for a person to think....always....obiedience..doesn't mean beeing stupid.
I will tell my girl...when the moment comes..when her thoughts are not wanted..and I take over. Before and afther...I like her to think..and be a "person"


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(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 3:53:08 AM   
MZaneGray9


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Amazing, isn't it?  So many people have forgotten what submission is.  What is handed over.  Does the process of TPE result in an empty vessel. Is it conceivable that even a slave, in total submission should subsume her being to to the extent of nothingness.  The more intelligent the woman, the more substance and measure of intellect, the better the slave.
Note:  Apart from the first question, all those following are sans ? - for they are rhetorical.

(in reply to giveeverything)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 11:24:40 AM   
TotalState


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quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Without the ability to choose, where can there be submission?

Well said!


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Profile   Post #: 49
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 11:44:35 AM   
eyesopened


Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
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quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Submission is obedience. Obedience is surrender. Surrender is a choice. Choice requires thought.

Without the ability to choose, where can there be submission?


Well said!  i was going to post something of the same thought but you said it so much better than i could.  Thanks!

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(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 12:27:34 PM   
BlackPhx


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MZaneGray9

Amazing, isn't it?  So many people have forgotten what submission is.  What is handed over.  Does the process of TPE result in an empty vessel. Is it conceivable that even a slave, in total submission should subsume her being to to the extent of nothingness.  The more intelligent the woman, the more substance and measure of intellect, the better the slave.
Note:  Apart from the first question, all those following are sans ? - for they are rhetorical.


Rhetorical or not you might be surprised at the number of people who think that TPE results in an empty vessel that can be filled any way you desire. It is instead a gradual transfer of all power, BOTH ways. Not a negation of self and intelligence. It is a Journey not a Destination, and I could not see anyone doing it with someone who had nothing but air between their ears. If someone so desires a slave/submissive who does not think for themselves, then they are taking on a burden far beyond those of mortal man. The only way to achieve such a creature I suspect is a prefrontal lobotomy or some major drugs.

There are of course some people who never met a thought that didn't run away in horror from them, but fortunately they tend to be rare. There are others even in this lifestyle choice that want to stop thinking, want someone to take all the responsibility, provide for them etc. the way you might provide for your cat or dog, but I suspect they find it hard to find someone to do exactly that.

I couldn't do that. There is far too much to experience and learn, and talk about, explore and think about to turn off my mind save when it hits sub space. I suspect Master would be bored pretty quickly if the only thing that ever crossed my mind was waiting for his use of me. There's an awful lot that wouldn't get done around here and for him if all I could do was emulate a Kelley Bundy on thorazine.

I am much more challenging and exciting with a brain.

poenkitten (who doesn't need the Wizard of Oz to supply her with one)

(in reply to MZaneGray9)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 2:42:01 PM   
MZaneGray9


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Black Phyx,
I think W/we can agree to agree.

(in reply to BlackPhx)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 2:46:20 PM   
MZaneGray9


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poenkitten ... My apologies, got your name wrong.
I think that the responses all round, especially from r/t submissives show that O/our lifestyle is essentially in a healthy state
Best wishes,
M Zane

(in reply to MZaneGray9)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 2:47:12 PM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
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quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened

quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Submission is obedience. Obedience is surrender. Surrender is a choice. Choice requires thought.

Without the ability to choose, where can there be submission?


Well said!  i was going to post something of the same thought but you said it so much better than i could.  Thanks!


well many people agree with the question...lol

but is some one going to answer it?


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Profile   Post #: 54
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 5:06:18 PM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened

quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Submission is obedience. Obedience is surrender. Surrender is a choice. Choice requires thought.

Without the ability to choose, where can there be submission?


Well said! i was going to post something of the same thought but you said it so much better than i could. Thanks!


well many people agree with the question...lol

but is some one going to answer it?



Have you an answer?

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Profile   Post #: 55
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 5:39:59 PM   
kallisto


Posts: 1185
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quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112


Without the ability to choose, where can there be submission?


There can't be submission without choosing.  I choose to be submissive.  No one made me.   It is the life I chose for myself.   Having independent thoughts and using my intelligence does not make me any less of sub.   Utlizing my brain to carry on in life does not make me disobedient.  

Someone else stated it above that they couldn't live with themselves if they had to play stupid.  Neither could I.  I couldn't be with a Dom who wanted me to be stupid.  

(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 6:17:42 PM   
BlackPhx


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Joined: 11/8/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened

quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Submission is obedience. Obedience is surrender. Surrender is a choice. Choice requires thought.

Without the ability to choose, where can there be submission?


I will take a stab at it..(pulls long sword)

Within this life choice, there is no submission without choice. This life choice however is not all there is.

Women, Men and Children are beaten, starved and tortured into submission all around the world. No choice, submit or die. I guess that would be a sort of choice in and of itself but it is not a choice for life.

A child can only endure, whether starved, beaten or tortured. Yes here in the US and in most 1st world countries they can tell, go to a cop or a teacher, but then again even here our news is filled with the death of children at the hands of parents or adults.

A woman or man trapped in an abusive relationship seemingly has the choice to leave, but the reality is, by the time it has turned that abusive (a slow insidious process that begins with first making them feel they have earned what happened, followed by a honeymoon phase, wash, rinse, repeat) the ability to make that choice has gone from them. IF they finally reach out or are reached by someone who notices and cares, it is almost impossible for them to make that choice to leave and many go back into the situation over and over again before they are finally able to make the choice to leave permanently. It is at that point they are in the most danger of death.

Too many die never having had the ability to make the choice to leave once ensnared. Beaten into submission, mentally, emotionally, physically, they no longer have the reserves to make a choice for leaving.

Prostitution is considered by most people to be a victimless crime. For the 16 year old on the street corner hooked on crack, heroin or controlled by a violent pimp there is no choice and they are victims. Getting free of that life is no picinic basket. If they are lucky they are busted and sent home underage. Most are not so lucky. Many came from homes that were already borderline, a foster care system already overwhelmed and neglectful, and prostitution is a way to survive. Not really a choice. I don't think too many teenage girls and boys dream about standing on a street corner and taking on anyone with the price of a BJ, risking HIV, and Death.

In many parts of the world there are still people who are slaves. Involuntary slaves.  Some of it is being cleaned up, but in some places it is only a coat of paint to hide the slavery still ongoing. There is no choice where parents sell a child to a brothel, or a young bride to an old man. The chattle has no choice but to live and endure and dream of another life..or die.

Check out the news. lack of choice is out there for slavery even in the US. A California couple was just busted a couple of months back for holding two illegal women in slavery.

Here we have a choice to submit and to whom, other places, not so much choice.

poenkitten

(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 7:21:23 PM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BlackPhx

Women, Men and Children are beaten, starved and tortured into submission all around the world. No choice, submit or die. I guess that would be a sort of choice in and of itself but it is not a choice for life.

poenkitten


It is a choice. Not a choice for life, but still a choice.

Submission is choice. It cannot be otherwise.

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Profile   Post #: 58
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/9/2008 8:06:00 PM   
BlackPhx


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Joined: 11/8/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlackPhx

Women, Men and Children are beaten, starved and tortured into submission all around the world. No choice, submit or die. I guess that would be a sort of choice in and of itself but it is not a choice for life.

poenkitten


It is a choice. Not a choice for life, but still a choice.

Submission is choice. It cannot be otherwise.


Unfortunately I have to respectfully disagree. Yes death might be a choice, for some. Often it is not, it is submit AND Die. Life is very cheap to some people, and they don't mind wasting another persons, no choice for the one who is slaughtered, starved or tortured to death.

poenkitten

(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: ability and desire for indepentant thought/decision... - 2/10/2008 2:16:14 AM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened

quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

Submission is obedience. Obedience is surrender. Surrender is a choice. Choice requires thought.

Without the ability to choose, where can there be submission?


Well said! i was going to post something of the same thought but you said it so much better than i could. Thanks!


well many people agree with the question...lol

but is some one going to answer it?



Have you an answer?


no..but if you agree on a question..then you should have an answer not?
I am curious about it.

(technically..you don;t agree on questions...but on answers ;)  )


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(in reply to celticlord2112)
Profile   Post #: 60
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