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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/14/2008 12:22:46 PM   
StormsSlave


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Status: offline 		lmao @Sailingbum...that's funny...I don't care who you are.

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/14/2008 12:25:08 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
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Status: offline 		Actually, I can agree with what she said. Especially since many of us, my self included slam the "Old Guard" mentality.

Jeff

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/14/2008 12:29:45 PM   
mnottertail


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quote:


StormsSlave
mnottertail...strangely enough, that makes a certain sense!


LOL....ja, I get that alot.

Ron

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/14/2008 1:36:59 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: StormsSlave

Califchick:  Please tell me which post so that I can correct my tone in the future.  I don't want to sound anyway but inquisitive.  Again with the links!!  When did I say anything about links??? 


I believe I said I "think" I remember one of your posts (but I'm too lazy to go look and see what I actually said).  It was this blurb in your OP that caused me to think that:  I understand that I can do a search and find answers to people's questions from the past.  However, I am currently asking the question, and would like answers to me from the people who are currently here.  I prefer a more personal, direct approach,

There was a post a while back that used that very same idea, if not the very same words, and they added something like, "don't just give me links to this question in the past, I want personal opinions from people here now".  If that wasn't you, then that wasn't you.  But saying you want "a more personal direct approach" still gives that same perception that I referenced before. 

Hey look, it's all good.  You had an idea that sounded good to you at the outset, a bunch of people said "bahhhhh!", we laughed, we joked, we made fun of Ron.  No worries.

Cali
(who knows the worry starts when Ron gets too close to Jeff's butt, cuz she does NOT want that visual)


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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/14/2008 1:42:12 PM   
StormsSlave


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Status: offline 		Well, it was a lively conversation, yes!!!

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/14/2008 3:59:42 PM   
Evility


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quote:

ORIGINAL: StormsSlave
Thanks to all who responded, especially the "elitists."


Newbies make comments like this and then wonder why they get bashed.

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/14/2008 4:25:05 PM   
tricia


Posts: 231
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		*FR*
 
Not to derail the thread but it seems like a good time to ask;  Newbie -- new to the boards or new to bdsm?
 
I'm always a bit confused when I see someone who's been here a whole five minutes (or two months) refer to others as newbies.
 
Thank you in advance for the clarification.

< Message edited by tricia -- 2/14/2008 4:27:41 PM >

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/14/2008 4:31:10 PM   
camille65


Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

So when you go home for Thanksgiving, is it all sweetness and light or is there any general snarkiness, sarcasm etc being thrown about. Because if the people who love you aren't always wonderful and accepting, why would you suppose strangers would be?

I ignore the snarky types, and reclarify my question if someone didn't understand it. I find that not having a huge chip on my shoulder helps. People who feel defensive come across on a text only medium as hostile. The other thing is that what you perceive as sarcasm they may have meant as humor. I find humor on the boards is easily understood, thus the use of emoticons to help indicate it.
  
quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

quote:

ORIGINAL: StormsSlave
<<huge snippedness>
 I'll take my humble pie with scoop of chocolate ice cream, thanks.
Flavor clash unless it is vanilla ice cream humble pie.

I didn't realize that exploring and exploiting one's sexual preferences gave one a license to be rude.  Hehehehehe ain't it grand to learn stuff?  To that end, I intend to keep asking my ignorant, amateur questions. Please do, there is a lot I still don't know. As some find gems in occasional answers I do the same with occasional 'basic' questions.  I'll just ignore the rude bastards.  As for the lurking and research, though I have been doing a ton of both.  I do way more reading than writing.  Ohboy me too. I pretty much read every forum here and post about 3% to what I read. A lot doesn't apply to me so no need to answer, some I cannot answer, some I know others will answer much better than I ever could.But I always read.
.

 I posted way back on the first page and your response to me confuses me. There was no mention of Thanksgiving or any holiday, and I didn't realise I had such a 'chip on my shoulder'. Am I mistaken that your post was directed towards me?

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/14/2008 7:47:18 PM   
amadeus77


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Status: offline 		kyra,
 
In the computer world, we have an acronym that's often used on newbies: RTFM, as in Read The Fucking Manual. As a computer geek, I understand that it's sometimes tiresome to answer the same questions again and again. I try to be patient with them, though, and remember that for them, the question is brand new.
 
I have no patience, though, for people who use their experience to put others down. I find it weak and cowardly. And it's a little more than ironic that it's the Doms who so often do this. How can someone master others if they haven't even learned to master themselves?

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/14/2008 7:48:06 PM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
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From: Sailin the stormy sea
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quote:

ORIGINAL: tricia

*FR*
 
Not to derail the thread but it seems like a good time to ask;  Newbie -- new to the boards or new to bdsm?
 
I'm always a bit confused when I see someone who's been here a whole five minutes (or two months) refer to others as newbies.
 
Thank you in advance for the clarification.


My guess is newbie and elitest are interchangable.  To wit they don't agree with the OP misconceptions of reality.  I hope that helps

BadOne

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/14/2008 10:58:27 PM   
LadyPact


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quote:

ORIGINAL: amadeus77

kyra,
 
In the computer world, we have an acronym that's often used on newbies: RTFM, as in Read The Fucking Manual. As a computer geek, I understand that it's sometimes tiresome to answer the same questions again and again. I try to be patient with them, though, and remember that for them, the question is brand new.
 
I have no patience, though, for people who use their experience to put others down. I find it weak and cowardly. And it's a little more than ironic that it's the Doms who so often do this. How can someone master others if they haven't even learned to master themselves?


I was actually going to respond to your prior thread in this post, but this one is probably better.  I think you might have brought to light something very valuable.

Now, I never heard the little acronym RTFM, but your mention of your own experience as a computer geek, does parallel exactly what might be happening here.  Rather than a BDSM forum, let's, for example, use the same situation for a computer tech discussion.

As a computer geek, how many times have you wanted to use your own expression for someone who is asking a simple question, that has been asked repeatedly, is written in several manuals or books, but the person just didn't want to rely on reading what's already out there?  If you, in your field, have actually come up with such a quick little way of  identifying this commonality, what makes you think the same thing doesn't happen right here on CM?  When you've been asked the same question repeatedly, by different people, but the same issue, does it ever color your response or your opinion?  Do you ever think, why don't you just RTFM?

It's really not up to CM to create a "newbie" board, or a FAQ list.  I think that might be why the search function was created in the first place.  Unlike what many would perceive from the current state, it really isn't everyone else's responsibility to cater to anyone else.  In fact, those answers to those frequently asked questions are already out there.  Just because they aren't directed to each individual who asks them, every single time they ask, doesn't mean the "Elite" haven't answered them before.  Those of us who have been around a bit, have just as much right to think to ourselves...... RTFM.


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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/15/2008 1:49:43 AM   
amadeus77


Posts: 23
Joined: 1/7/2008
Status: offline 		Right, well, here's the thing. When faced with either answering the same question over and over OR being snarky, there's a third way: the FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions). It exists because we understand that both of the other answers to this common problem aren't particularly good ones.
 
CM doesn't have FAQ's, but some thoughtful posters point to links of past threads where the topic's been discussed. That seems to me a much more productive way to handle the situation.

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/15/2008 2:12:39 AM   
PrizedPosession


Posts: 1209
Joined: 11/2/2007
Status: offline 		What i did was go on the casual conversation section, make friends then you can ask them if you feel uncomfortable posting or too lazy to research. Plus it's a good way to make chat buddies.

But a whole newbie chat thread seems pointless since everyone answers on everyone elses forum anyway
-bobcat


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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/15/2008 4:15:59 AM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		We have all been new to this and any other message board at one point.  I tend to find that those who get flamed tend to word things in passive aggressive ways.  Takenbyjohnr and bobkgin are perfect examples.  Look back at their threads and how they worded them.  When you've been on a message board long enough you get to learn posting styles of various posters.  Some are sweet.  Some blunt and some are rude.  It's just a little cross sampling of life.
Also...remember when people told you when you were growing up that there were no stupid questions????   So not true.  There are.

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/15/2008 4:58:04 AM   
RedMagic1


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968
remember when people told you when you were growing up that there were no stupid questions????   So not true.  There are.

And not just stupid.  An awful lot of people post questions like, "I'm in a relationship that's kinda boring.  I want to do something that I know is unethical, stupid and/or insane, but I can't quite rationalize it to myself.  Can you KINKY PEOPLE please give me some more reasons I should do it?"  How insulting can you get?  "Y'all ain't vanilla, so you must be cheaters and fools!"  Fortunately, I don't have to do anything on such threads.  I just watch the "mindless submissives" bury the OP under a pile of rubble.

Which points out (1) that not only Doms can have valid opinions, or a sharp tongue, and (2) not only Doms "welcome" newbies.


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Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/15/2008 5:03:25 AM   
mnottertail


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quote:

ORIGINAL: amadeus77

Right, well, here's the thing. When faced with either answering the same question over and over OR being snarky, there's a third way: the FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions). It exists because we understand that both of the other answers to this common problem aren't particularly good ones.
 
CM doesn't have FAQ's, but some thoughtful posters point to links of past threads where the topic's been discussed. That seems to me a much more productive way to handle the situation.


FAQs have been discussed at length in the Gorean Forums....same reason as out  here (most common question?  What is Gorean.) The trouble is that it is such a motile and personally angled environment that no one can agree on fundamentals.

What is the FAQ for difference between slave and submissive? littlebitxxx got it at spelling, but......

And by example, LuckyAlbatross links the shit outta stuff, and we had a thread puller before that (nameless, since she is retired...lol) and they get bitched at because they are seen in the full regalia of pedantic haughtiness, and I can assure you that is not what they are about.

So, this is another circular argument.

RTFM.  (Also a computer geek)

Ron 

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/15/2008 6:45:36 AM   
StormsSlave


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Evility

quote:

ORIGINAL: StormsSlave
Thanks to all who responded, especially the "elitists."


Newbies make comments like this and then wonder why they get bashed.



Trisha...if you read all the posts, you would have seen that I've already explained that the use of the word "elitists" was supposed to be tongue in cheek.  A joke of sorts.  I think I might have even apologized that it didn't come across that way. 

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/15/2008 7:06:57 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		Ron what is Gorean.  Is that a global warming thing?

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/15/2008 7:07:40 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		see the FAQ that will be there

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RE: Whaddya think? A forum for newbies? - 2/15/2008 7:44:06 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: amadeus77

Right, well, here's the thing. When faced with either answering the same question over and over OR being snarky, there's a third way: the FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions). It exists because we understand that both of the other answers to this common problem aren't particularly good ones.
 
CM doesn't have FAQ's, but some thoughtful posters point to links of past threads where the topic's been discussed. That seems to me a much more productive way to handle the situation.

Again, I would have to say that the search function covers that.  I think it was more the idea from the OP, that they didn't especially care for the feature, and wanted to ask the questions again, rather than read the information that was already available through prior posts.  If I recall, the OP specifically said she would rather have the replies fashioned for themselves, rather than read what some had posted prior.  Should a person have a question that is asked frequently, I'm fairly sure that typing that question in the search box will bring up results.  It's not that the information hasn't been provided.  It's more that the OP would prefer to read current responses.  From the other side of the coin, some have seen that it's already been provided, and don't feel the need to type up the answers again and again.  A FAQ section wouldn't avoid this, as the OP was specific in stating they wanted the answers directed to them.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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