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RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/19/2008 7:15:04 AM

urlittleprincess

Posts: 149
Joined: 12/18/2007
Status: offline

i wish i had a good answer for you...it has been a long time since i have been made to sleep on the floor and i want to keep it in the past!! it hurts to be told to sleep on the floor and away from Him but it has only ever happened as a result of my own attitude or behavior!

in the first few months of our relationship i would sigh excessively, turn over dramatically or cry if i was upset or annoyed at bedtime, and would find myself sent to the floor. of course the behavior would continue and would usually see me get a spanking too and then be sent unceremoniously back to my bed on the floor...i had to learn to modify my behavior and this hasnt been an issue for a long time. only once did He make me sleep on the floor in another room (bathroom) and it ended with Him tying me up for 4 hours too!

as others have said though, if he has told you this isn't a punishment then it is up to you to view it differently. obviously he wants you close by, but perhaps has some issues he has not told you about (needing undisturbed sleep, or maybe you kick in your sleep?) personally i think it is emotional torture to not allow you into bed with him and perhaps that is what he wants right now. is he a sadist? perhaps he will make you sleep on the floor until you no longer struggle with it emotionally?

my Dom and i only share a bed about 1/3 of the month and He has told me He values our time together too much to tie me up and throw me in a closet or have me sleep away from Him....i am His comfort as surely as He is mine...make no mistake though...if He decided it would please Him for me to sleep on the floor that is where i will have to sleep!

(in reply to meticulousgirl)

Post #: 41

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/19/2008 7:24:49 AM

Kana

Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: urlittleprincess

as others have said though, if he has told you this isn't a punishment then it is up to you to view it differently. obviously he wants you close by, but perhaps has some issues he has not told you about (needing undisturbed sleep, or maybe you kick in your sleep?) personally i think it is emotional torture to not allow you into bed with him and perhaps that is what he wants right now. is he a sadist? perhaps he will make you sleep on the floor until you no longer struggle with it emotionally?

Sometimes its just about authority. Its a flat out assertion of power.
It can also be one of those things that is offered on occasion as a reward.
You have been such a good girl, you can sleep on the bed tonight and snuggle.
But it sure does remind one of her place real quick like.

Once again its a case of does he need a reason?
Its not for her to wonder why, its for her to obey.
Thats all, not question, not whine, just obey.
If one of mine did what you are doing, she would sleep on the floor until she learned to obey.
It would stop being about whatever it originally started as and become about the principle of submission.

But a dogbed might not be a bad idea if it is something that is going to happen often.
I wouldn't be heartless about the whole thing.

< Message edited by Kana -- 2/19/2008 7:32:59 AM >

(in reply to urlittleprincess)

Post #: 42

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/19/2008 7:37:08 AM

Belladonna30

Posts: 43
Joined: 1/18/2008
Status: offline

Greetings All and especially meticulousgirl,

i have been following this thread as i find it interesting. Sleeping on the floor is miserable, but the thing that throws me the most is that He took His collar from you. Now, my Master and i have discussed this at length after reading your thread and W/we both find it odd that He would remove your collar for a NON-PUNISHMENT. It simply does not make any sense to either of U/us. Sir would never remove the collar He put upon my neck unlesss its for showers (its leather and would get ruined), work (I work in profession that would frown upon a collar), or O/our relationship ending. Not even for a punishment would He remove it from me, it is to remind me constantly that i belong to Him and His will is law.

Why does your Sir remove your collar? What reasons has He given? i would be devestated over that part more over the "sleeping arrangement".

~bella~

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 43

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/19/2008 7:38:18 AM

meticulousgirl

Posts: 969
Joined: 2/20/2007
Status: offline

never thought about the benedryl.....

even nyquil as nasty as it is would work...

thanks for all of the responses...

~meticulous~

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 44

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/19/2008 8:47:34 AM

meticulousgirl

Posts: 969
Joined: 2/20/2007
Status: offline

i dont wear my collar that often...it's been months maybe even a year since i've actually had it around my neck even though i'm collared, it's not always put around my neck, i have a very public job and therefor my collar isn't actually a collar it is actually a ring...the actual collar is typically only put around my neck durring scenes but, there often times when it is not yet the physical collar is another one of my security blankets....

When it is around my neck the emotions dont exist, im humbled, and one thing that many aren't understanding and maybe it's because i said it later in my post. He didn't punnish me Sat. night, the spanking was play, to humble me, to make me cry probably so that i would fall asleep easier (and yes it works he knows that makes it easier because he knows me).

my Owner is sadistic, sometimes a little more than what i can handle both physically and definitly emotionally, punnishments are emotional hell and that's why i say that it wasn't punnishment. He may have put me on the floor but that is nothing compared to what His punnishments are like. Sure, Hes probably trying to break me into being comfortable with sleeping on the floor first off to humble me, and second of all because there are times when i do need to be reminded of my place because i get too wrapped up in what i want sometimes and it gets to both of Us a bit to much. The third reason is because maybe He's just wanting to be sadistic that night, and push me, test me, and see my reaction. The other night i was probably more obedient than i've ever been just because i wanted to make Him see that even though i hated that moment, i wanted Him to notice the obedience, even though i cried and layed there with my mind racing with all of that "crap" i never got up, never begged Him, never did any of the things that i did that first time He choose to put me on the floor for the night.

i understand where He is coming from, and understand my fears the question is just a matter of how do you get over them?

Yes i do give in to everything, i submit to it all, He has pushed every moderate limit that i have had and i've been ok with every single one of them because i trust Him. This one particular subject though is just bringing me to a place that i am completely unfamiliar with, it's leaving me extremely confused and unsure of myself, and Us (not Him but, Us) and it's not a place that i like to be in because, when i feel that way it's usually due to punnishment. i do associate that choice He is making with punnishment because of the past but, at the same time this time when He had me lie down with the pillow and sleeping bag as well as the little stuffed penguin even though i hated the emotional factor it was still really humbling on my end, and i said that before, i obeyed, He didn't get angry with me because i obeyed and didn't give Him a hard time over it, if i had i'm not sure that i would have gotten the same response that i did last time for several reasons the main one being that this wasn't punnishment, the second being He knows that there are times when i'm more acceptive to things than others and also knows that it's not an act of disobedience on my end it's just something new and something i'm just not use to yet...and when i woke up i still felt humbled, with the urge to masterbate because the experience did turn me on. ( I forgot about that part until just now)

Yes again, He is sadistic, there is a part of Him that enjoys seeing me cry but, He has never gone to far with it, sure He pushes, and He knows that i want Him too but, at the end of the day when all is said and done what i still feel like i need at this point is some form of comfort, it doesn't have to be in the bed, i just need to know that i am wanted, and cared about because sometimes the sadistic side of Him can make you believe otherwise.....but, i kind of like that too....

Thank you all for your replies, and even for being so understanding that i dont want a bashing session or pitty party session, but, instead want to learn how to curb the emotional factor of the reasons why i hate it and want to fight those negative feelings at that moment.

~meticulous~

(in reply to meticulousgirl)

Post #: 45

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/19/2008 1:23:23 PM

Belladonna30

Posts: 43
Joined: 1/18/2008
Status: offline

Ok, well all seems good than according to what you say now. i would say the best way to get over it would be to do it consistently (even at home alone). That way you become more accustomed to it? Just a thought. Other than that the mental aspect is in your hands.

Also, what on the gods green earth would possess him to think or even give the impression that you are the one that got him sick? Thats just odd, lol, no offense but i had to giggle about that whole thing.

Cheers!
~bella~

(in reply to meticulousgirl)

Post #: 46

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/19/2008 2:22:47 PM

batshalom

Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: meticulousgirl

in chatting with someone else earlier in email it made me realize that it's mainly the feeling of not being wanted that gets to me the most.

this is the hardest thing that i have had to get passed because at the end of the day i want the comfort, the safety net etc....

So then, basically this is all about you.

He obviously wants you or one of you wouldn't be there. At the end of the day, regardless if you want a safety net, you are his slave. This is a very low-key assignment toward which you display a manipulative reaction. Stop focusing on your wants - he is not harming you but he is also not giving you kisses and footrubs. Focus on your obedience, following his orders, and let that fill you up with warm fuzzies.

(in reply to meticulousgirl)

Post #: 47

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/19/2008 2:32:52 PM

meticulousgirl

Posts: 969
Joined: 2/20/2007
Status: offline

because my entire office has been germ infested for about a month now and even though i havn't had anything that doesn't mean i'm not carrying something around inside of me....i'm younger and can fight it off faster we'll just put it that way.

come to find out it 100% was not me. and it's a known fact at this point....(I WAS RIGHT) but, my M.S. is sick again only this time He knows what it really is..........i'm sure the appology will come at some point but then again He's sadistic so rather than i'm sorry, He'll take me to dinner or give me some scene that i've been wanting....so now i'm just contemplating on going over there, i hate it when He's like this and i know exactly what to expect if i do go over there......

~meticulous~

(in reply to Belladonna30)

Post #: 48

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/19/2008 3:13:40 PM

littlesui

Posts: 39
Joined: 3/1/2006
Status: offline

I have been made to sleep on the floor - though at the side of the bed and with collar and lead on. I have to say I didn't enjoy the experience in the slightest, was uncomfortable and frozen (no blankets or other coverings). In fact it was when I was dithering with cold I resorted to asking politely if I would be allowed back. I was (for which i was very thank ful!). It certainly wasn't a punishment for me - he just liked the fact I was sleeping on the floor - effectively chained - while he slept in the bed. Would I do it again - yes, probably. I still wouldn't enjoy it for myself - rather endure it because he enjoyed it...and hope he didn't have a long term fascination with the idea ;o)

(in reply to meticulousgirl)

Post #: 49

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/19/2008 3:20:09 PM

joy2u

Posts: 89
Joined: 2/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: meticulousgirl

So my question is: How do those who sleep on the floor either periodicly or on a regular basis emotionally / mentally handle it?

i can't really give you any advice, since sleeping on the floor has never been a problem for me, neither physically nor emotionally. But, then again, i have also been a tent camper my whole life and have always enjoyed sleeping in a sleeping bag on the ground.

Sleeping on the floor has never been a punishment or a humiliation for me. It's never been an emotional issue for me.

When i first visited my Master and then, moved-in permanently, just over 2 years ago, my bed was always on the floor of His bedroom closet. i loved my bed. It was my special place to sleep. i liked sleeping on His floor and i was still close enough to my Master to go to Him, if He called to me and, then, go back to my place on His floor when He was ready to sleep.

About 4 months ago, my Master decided He wanted me in His bed at night and that's where i have slept ever since. It's nice but, i don't feel that i have to be in His bed, except to please Him and, if and when the day comes that He decides to send me back onto the floor, i will happily go back to my special bed on my Master's floor. Wherever He wants me, that's where i want to be.

Hopefully, you can find a way to resolve your issues with where you sleep. Getting a good night's sleep is a very important part of physical and emotional health.

joy
Owned servant of Master David

(in reply to meticulousgirl)

Post #: 50

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/19/2008 4:22:28 PM

alandraofMists

Posts: 187
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: meticulousgirl

the floor is and always has been a hard limit and He knows it.....as i've said before, being in bed with Him at the end of the night is the only form of comfort He has ever allowed me...it's a big deal to me but, i'm not sure that He realizes just how big of a deal.

but then again....i have no limits anymore grrrrrrr.
~meticulous~

The part i have bolded i would like more clarification on please. You get no form of comfort at all any other time with him? no kneeling by his side or at his feet? etc... there is no other pleasures in you service to him that you can gain comfort in.

The way i percieve that bolded statement is that you find nothing else comforting or enjoyable while in his service. maybe listing all the things you enjoy and get pleasure in doing for him and with him you might be able be less dependent on sleeping with him which would make sleeping on the floor easier for you.

Knight's alandra

(in reply to meticulousgirl)

Post #: 51

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/20/2008 9:12:07 AM

SlaveSubtoserve

Posts: 282
Joined: 6/21/2006
Status: offline

For this s. it has been a regular thing in some past relationships and actually view it as a way positively to reinforce this s.' lowly position vis a vis M. in the relationship so .....

(in reply to alandraofMists)

Post #: 52

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/20/2008 10:48:12 AM

meticulousgirl

Posts: 969
Joined: 2/20/2007
Status: offline

alandra all that i'm going to say is that i'm not going to twist this thread by saying what your thinking i'm going to say or interpretting this as, your reading more into it than what there really is and mind you some people live this lifestyle differently than others, my Owner tends to live it differently than i do, my mindest is much deeper at times than His when it comes to certain things, and His is deeper than mine it just depends on the particular interest in question.

He has never had an interest in after care, so that's what i have always seen the end of the night, in His arms in bed as.

i mean dont get me wrong there are other times that Him and i are just "normal" and then i can hold him like a teddy bear all i want not in D's mode but, lately His sadistic side is coming out much more than ever before, and there are certain things i feel like i can and cant handle. This being one of them, i would much rather slowly be broken into this due to the emotional paranoia if you will of the past.........

~meticulous~

(in reply to SlaveSubtoserve)

Post #: 53

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/20/2008 4:21:53 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Well, the only thing you can do is tell him how he's hitting an emotional trigger doing this.

If it's driving a wedge between you, making you believe he's lying when he claims it isn't punishment, giving no aftercare when you need it to be okay, etc; then only you can decide how much emotional sadism you can handle and when you need to choose between obedience and self protection. But I wouldn't suggest allowing him to break you because it's so much fun for him. Afterwards, you won't be any fun to play with, broken toys rarely are, and you'll be discarded anyway.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to meticulousgirl)

Post #: 54

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/20/2008 6:59:35 PM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: meticulousgirl

alandra all that i'm going to say is that i'm not going to twist this thread by saying what your thinking i'm going to say or interpretting this as, your reading more into it than what there really is and mind you some people live this lifestyle differently than others, my Owner tends to live it differently than i do, my mindest is much deeper at times than His when it comes to certain things, and His is deeper than mine it just depends on the particular interest in question.

He has never had an interest in after care, so that's what i have always seen the end of the night, in His arms in bed as.

i mean dont get me wrong there are other times that Him and i are just "normal" and then i can hold him like a teddy bear all i want not in D's mode but, lately His sadistic side is coming out much more than ever before, and there are certain things i feel like i can and cant handle. This being one of them, i would much rather slowly be broken into this due to the emotional paranoia if you will of the past.........

~meticulous~

Meticulous, I actually wondered the same thing alandra did, since you did say, "...as i've said before, being in bed with Him at the end of the night is the only form of comfort He has ever allowed me" The ONLY form of comfort he has EVER allowed you...meaning you are never allowed to feel comfort at any other time, for any other situation. No one is twisting your thread. The words you actually communicated are being addressed.

Many people on this thread have told you how they handle it (myself included) and have given their opinions. It seems the opinions you don't agree with you have argued. You are indeed making this issue about you, rather than your Master, although you say you are not. You have talked about how YOU feel, how YOU react, and now, how YOU prefer he would do this with you. If your relationship is set up to be you-centric, then no problema. But if you are setting out to please your Master, and if you trust his decisions for you, then I suggest trusting this decision for you as well. How do you deal with being upset? You know that it's what he wants of you, you trust him, and you decide you are stronger than whatever power you are giving to the prospect of sleeping on the floor. Just because it's hard doesn't mean it shouldn't be done. If you have shared with him your in depth feelings about this and still he wants you to do it, then find pleasure and pride in the fact that you are putting out your best effort for him and working to overcome your traumas and fears.

Something I often heard: "If it was easy, anyone could do it. The fact that it is not and you do it anyway is what pleases me."

(in reply to meticulousgirl)

Post #: 55

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/20/2008 7:15:40 PM

batshalom

Posts: 1990
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

Just because it's hard doesn't mean it shouldn't be done. If you have shared with him your in depth feelings about this and still he wants you to do it, then find pleasure and pride in the fact that you are putting out your best effort for him and working to overcome your traumas and fears.

Something I often heard: "If it was easy, anyone could do it. The fact that it is not and you do it anyway is what pleases me."

Just mahvelous, girlie. ~smiling~

Take pride in doing the things that are tough - anybody can be a kitten (eww, no offense meant, Aqua ... meow meow mew mew meow) but it takes deep commitment to be His submissive. Live up to it. Learn. Grow in your submission, meticulous. You're a smart girl - you know what abuse is and what it's not - so knuckle down and submit well and submit happily - you are serving the man you love. You can do it.

< Message edited by batshalom -- 2/20/2008 7:16:27 PM >

(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 56

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/20/2008 7:21:43 PM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline

Have you considered that this is a test against yourself?

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to meticulousgirl)

Post #: 57

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/20/2008 7:49:56 PM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: batshalom

Take pride in doing the things that are tough - anybody can be a kitten (eww, no offense meant, Aqua ... meow meow mew mew meow) but it takes deep commitment to be His submissive. Live up to it. Learn. Grow in your submission, meticulous. You're a smart girl - you know what abuse is and what it's not - so knuckle down and submit well and submit happily - you are serving the man you love. You can do it.

OK at the risk of having a love-fest with batshalom on this thread,

, I really really love what was written here.

(in reply to batshalom)

Post #: 58

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/21/2008 8:32:15 AM

Sundowner

Posts: 2549
Joined: 3/11/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

...

Just because it's hard doesn't mean it shouldn't be done.

...

Something I often heard: "If it was easy, anyone could do it. The fact that it is not and you do it anyway is what pleases me."

Spot on ownedgirlie. And just because it's hard means it should be done......... if you want to show (and for the selfish, feel) your submissive love that is.

Not a great deal of point being here if you feel you only want to submit to the nice things. We generally call that enjoyment, not submission. But the trick is to achieve that wonderful weird contradiction of enjoying submission.

(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 59

RE: For those of you who have had to sleep on the floor - 2/21/2008 8:39:34 AM

camille65

Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Well, the only thing you can do is tell him how he's hitting an emotional trigger doing this.

If it's driving a wedge between you, making you believe he's lying when he claims it isn't punishment, giving no aftercare when you need it to be okay, etc; then only you can decide how much emotional sadism you can handle and when you need to choose between obedience and self protection. But I wouldn't suggest allowing him to break you because it's so much fun for him. Afterwards, you won't be any fun to play with, broken toys rarely are, and you'll be discarded anyway.

OPI agree that he needs to know just how strong an emotional reaction this elicts from you, a negative reaction that he may know the full extent of. If it is hard for you to verbalise perhaps you can write it and tell him why it hurts, it can be difficult to understand someones reaction if they keep the emotions closed off. I do wish you luck. The part I bolded I'm not sure I understand.Why would meticulous 'be discarded anyway'? I think that is a undermining statement and of no help, do you know that her master discards those he breaks down emotionally?It could be quite the opposite, it could be that he wants to break her down to rebuild her.There is no way for us to know. We are not in his head or in their relationship.

_____________________________

~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 60

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