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RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 1:44:02 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline 		all of their songs are kinkceptually created....It takes the depth that Jeffff so clearly lacks to see the beauty...Such a thin line between kink and crap.


"The ones you never notice are the ones you have to watch.
She's pleasant and she's friendly while she's looking at your crotch.
Try your hand at conversation, gossip is a lie,
And sure enough she'll take you home and make you wanna die."

Fair Game-CS&N



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Profile   Post #: 81
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 1:47:38 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		I grieve for my lost depth

Jeff

(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 82
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 1:51:48 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

I grieve for my lost depth

Jeff



Bob has depth to spare....Perhaps he will sell you some. If you buy too much... LaT and Katy, I imagine, might be in the market for some.

< Message edited by domiguy -- 2/20/2008 1:52:17 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 83
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 1:57:26 PM   
kittinSol


Posts: 16926
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent

Some women are like stray dogs that have been kicked and bullied and are crying out for a master to be kind to them and gain their trust - over time, they'll come 'round, and once you have their trust they're not going anywhere.



There's always the solution of the RSPW.

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Profile   Post #: 84
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 2:02:35 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I value the respect of my friends and colleagues, but if I pinned ALL of my self worth to the perceptions of others I would be in some serious shit! 

I freely admit that I have grief issues.  I pretty much never get over anything.  If there is a movie or book where someone dies, just expect me to be hunting for kleenex, because I Relate.  Does this stop me from getting on with the rest of my life?  Hardly.  I have been in an astoundingly dreadful relationship, and it took me years to work through the mistrust that I developed.  It wasn't that I didn't trust other people--it was that I didn't trust my own judgement anymore. 

In the meantime, life goes on, the pets get fed, and hopefully we don't take advantage of other people in the attempt to spackle over our own cracks.

And we never, ever, EVER listen to CSN unless we have had several beers first.

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[page 23 girl]



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Profile   Post #: 85
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 2:37:52 PM   
NorthernGent


Posts: 8730
Joined: 7/10/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol

There's always the solution of the RSPW.



True, they used to be as good as gold - but Thatcher's in charge these days so you wouldn't like them. I'd take you in, Kittin, but my house is packed to the rafters with Nigerian breeding slaves. I had you down as more of a Women's Institute type - making jam and hosting tea parties in the street with Union flags draped across washing lines.

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I have the courage to be a coward - but not beyond my limits.

Sooner or later, the man who wins is the man who thinks he can.

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Profile   Post #: 86
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 2:43:54 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline 		This is a touchy subject for me, because it IS what I have been
living/dealing with for a couple of years.
 
I have learned to live with grief, we are companions.
I have had a loss, I will never "get over", and I have not tried to "get over" it.
I have taken grief by the hand and I know grief very well.
Grief and I are running mates, not ever friends, but we are certainly together.

Sometimes the key in life, is not how well you get over things.
It is how well you deal with them, AND continue to live your life.
I will never, ever get over losing my mother.
My favorite lines from the Gladiator are "You WILL see them again, but not yet."
She wants me to live my life until that time, that is how I have found peace.

I am living my life in a way that I know that she is proud of, and I am taking
great care of the people she loved the most.

THAT is the job she left me, and I do it with love.
I am proud of myself.
Peace

< Message edited by MzMia -- 2/20/2008 2:50:03 PM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to Loveisallyouneed)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 2:51:47 PM   
Loveisallyouneed


Posts: 348
Joined: 2/5/2008
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

This is a touchy subject for me, because it IS what I have been
living/dealing with for a couple of years.
 
I have learned to live with grief, we are companions.
I have had a loss, I will never "get over", and I have not tried to "get over" it.
I have taken grief by the hand and I know grief very well.
Grief and I are running mates, not ever friends, but we are certainly together.

Sometimes the key in life, is not how well you get over things.
It is how well you deal with them, AND continue to live your life.
I will never, ever get over losing my mother.
My favorite lines from the gladiator are "You WILL see them again, but not yet."
She wants me to live my life until that time, that is how I have found peace.
I am proud of myself.
Peace


Just watched that movie a few days ago and cried to see the loss enacted with such feeling.

You've described things so well, Mia.

Peace


(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 2:56:47 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Loveisallyouneed

quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

This is a touchy subject for me, because it IS what I have been
living/dealing with for a couple of years.
 
I have learned to live with grief, we are companions.
I have had a loss, I will never "get over", and I have not tried to "get over" it.
I have taken grief by the hand and I know grief very well.
Grief and I are running mates, not ever friends, but we are certainly together.

Sometimes the key in life, is not how well you get over things.
It is how well you deal with them, AND continue to live your life.
I will never, ever get over losing my mother.
My favorite lines from the gladiator are "You WILL see them again, but not yet."
She wants me to live my life until that time, that is how I have found peace.
I am proud of myself.
Peace


Just watched that movie a few days ago and cried to see the loss enacted with such feeling.

You've described things so well, Mia.

Peace


Thank you so much Bob, I will be crying in a few.
She is/was my best friend in the world, the loss is uncomprehensionable.
 
One thing about my mother was she was funny as hell and she made my laugh,
we were always laughing.
She was hooked on Comedy Central and Dave Chappelle at the end.
What great gifts to leave your child? Love, happiness, laughter and joy.


You have my prayers Bob.

< Message edited by MzMia -- 2/20/2008 3:00:33 PM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to Loveisallyouneed)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 3:02:34 PM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline 		sigh...nobody pinched me, poked me, or did anything when i streaked across the room.... how am i going to grieve over this???? nobody wants me.... wahhhh...

goes off to the corner to cry


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I did not reply to your cmail.
I am flawed.
Imperfect.
MUST SPANK!!!
SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

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Profile   Post #: 90
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 3:09:35 PM   
Loveisallyouneed


Posts: 348
Joined: 2/5/2008
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

You have my prayers Bob.


And you have mine, Mia.

Fortunately for me my mother is still with us, and we celeberate our mutual birthday on Monday (I'll be 51, I think she'll be 45, again ).

Don't want to think of losing her ... after my father passed away she was our strength and our sanctuary. I cried myself to sleep for a year after that, can only imagine how that must have torn her up.


(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 3:18:22 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Loveisallyouneed

quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

You have my prayers Bob.


And you have mine, Mia.

Fortunately for me my mother is still with us, and we celeberate our mutual birthday on Monday (I'll be 51, I think she'll be 45, again ).

Don't want to think of losing her ... after my father passed away she was our strength and our sanctuary. I cried myself to sleep for a year after that, can only imagine how that must have torn her up.




Bob, my mother was not sick.
She was working and walking around just as we are.
Not going to bore you with the details, but I will say this..
If you manage to live through one of the hardest things you will ever live
through, you don't sweat the pity shit.
 
If it seems like I don't give a damn about a lot of "little" things?
It's true, I don't give a flying fuck about small things anymore.
THAT has been liberating.
You don't live through tragedy, and worry about who likes you, or what others think
about you, impressing others, etc.
 Mz. Mia is free

< Message edited by MzMia -- 2/20/2008 3:20:04 PM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to Loveisallyouneed)
Profile   Post #: 92
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 3:19:33 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline
quote:

MzMia
I will never, ever get over losing my mother.



I love you MzMia....I do have to take a little exception with what people have written about grief...I'm sorry about your mother. However, there is a reality to life and part of that reality is to become accepting of death. Everyone...I mean every single one of us if we live long enough will out live our parents. In fact, I'm fairly sure that is their wish. While I do think it is normal to grieve...There is also a normal time to do so and then move on. No person would want someone to carry around a heavy heart when they are recalled......

I would...Bit I'm rather fucked up! Quite frankly I would like the world to come to a screeching halt upon my demise....How are we to continue?...The future is no longer all of that appealing.

We are a resilient people, we humans. For some reason in the West we don't deal with death all that well. It is an odd thing. Everyone of us will die.

I can't imagine what a drag it would be to deal with a woman that couldn't get passed a "lost" love...."Ya know Domi, When Frank was alive he would have never ate my pussy like that."...Wouldn't that just be a blast?

I think excessive grief is self centered and a selfish act...It removes the significance of the person's life and thrusts the attention on how that person's death is affecting you....How fucked up is that shit? It's no longer a celebration of that person's existence but a fucked up way for someone to garnish the spotlight in the wake of one's passing. It's fucking drama. It's awful. It's not becoming....And it really is an act for the weak.

Charlotte Perkins Gilman:

Death? Why this fuss about death. Use your imagination, try to visualize a world without death! ... Death is the essential condition of life, not an evil.



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Profile   Post #: 93
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 3:22:01 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline 		All I have to say to you is this, DG.
IF you live long enough, someone you love deeply will die.
Until that happens, you have not a clue.
 
I have friends that I just can't relate to some of the things they obsess and worry about.
Most will not change until someone close to them dies, I hate to say it.
 
I have 1 friend that lost her mother, father, brother and sister within 13 years, now WE
can relate.
I tell you THAT friend, rarely sweats silly or unimportant shit.
 
Believe what I say.

< Message edited by MzMia -- 2/20/2008 3:34:51 PM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 3:29:01 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

All I have to say to you is this, DG.
IF you live long enough, someone you love deeply will die.
Until that happens, you have not a clue.
Believe what I say.



Silly thing to say. Lost my mother...She was 57...A young woman. My uncle passed from cancer at age 62...Leaving behind a wife and three kids.

We had a cousin die in a car crash it might have been a suicide....His dad couldn't get passed it and soured as the time went by....You have to decide which camp you are in. It's really pretty easy...Do you recall a lost one and smile or does your heart feel heavy with grief? Is the crime that they died? Or is it simply a blessing that they were in your life to begin with?

We feel that life is a promise to the future...It's not. It is today. We celebrate birth and curse death.....So again...

Charlotte Perkins Gilman:

Death? Why this fuss about death. Use your imagination, try to visualize a world without death! ... Death is the essential condition of life, not an evil.

_____________________________



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Profile   Post #: 95
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 3:31:45 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy


quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

All I have to say to you is this, DG.
IF you live long enough, someone you love deeply will die.
Until that happens, you have not a clue.
Believe what I say.



Silly thing to say. Lost my mother...She was 57...A young woman. My uncle passed from cancer at age 62...Leaving behind a wife and three kids.

We had a cousin die in a car crash it might have been a suicide....His dad couldn't get passed it and soured as the time went by....You have to decide which camp you are in. It's really pretty easy...Do you recall a lost one and smile or does your heart feel heavy with grief? Is the crime that they died? Or is it simply a blessing that they were in your life to begin with?

We feel that life is a promise to the future...It's not. It is today. We celebrate birth and curse death.....So again...

Charlotte Perkins Gilman:

Death? Why this fuss about death. Use your imagination, try to visualize a world without death! ... Death is the essential condition of life, not an evil.


I am so sorry for you losses.
But guess what?
I have cracked the DG code!!
I know why you are so carefree, with that attitude.

You are like me!!!
You really don't give a fuck!!!
{{{{{{{{{{Huggles!!!!}}}}}}}}}

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 96
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 3:34:14 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline 		 Well, I understand it could be a turn off, for some people to have to "hear" about
someone's loss all the time.

Which is one of the reasons I enjoy being single.
 
But on the other hand, is it really for you or anyone else to tell someone that they should
get "over it" or when they should "get over it"?

< Message edited by MzMia -- 2/20/2008 3:40:38 PM >

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 97
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 3:42:05 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy


quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

All I have to say to you is this, DG.
IF you live long enough, someone you love deeply will die.
Until that happens, you have not a clue.
Believe what I say.



Silly thing to say. Lost my mother...She was 57...A young woman. My uncle passed from cancer at age 62...Leaving behind a wife and three kids.

We had a cousin die in a car crash it might have been a suicide....His dad couldn't get passed it and soured as the time went by....You have to decide which camp you are in. It's really pretty easy...Do you recall a lost one and smile or does your heart feel heavy with grief? Is the crime that they died? Or is it simply a blessing that they were in your life to begin with?

We feel that life is a promise to the future...It's not. It is today. We celebrate birth and curse death.....So again...

Charlotte Perkins Gilman:

Death? Why this fuss about death. Use your imagination, try to visualize a world without death! ... Death is the essential condition of life, not an evil.


I am so sorry for you losses.
But guess what?
I have cracked the DG code!!
I know why you are so carefree, with that attitude.

You are like me!!!
You really don't give a fuck!!!
{{{{{{{{{{Huggles!!!!}}}}}}}}}


It's really silly to say that you are sorry...I guess it sounds nice but in fact it is a little hollow. I mean we correspond send a note or two back and forth but are we really sorry or is it just something polite and nice to say?

Death...It's just a thang...Three thousand die on 9/11 ..."We will never forget!".....Pfffft..We read about the plane crash over lunch and four more soldiers are blowed up in Iraq as we watch the butter melt into the nooks of our english muffin.

Death it's no big deal! Until it happens to us. How or why would we ever be expected to be prepared for such an event? Why should anyone ever die? Just because every single living thing on this planet has lived and died up to this point...I really thought that my loved ones would be the exceptions to the rule. It's self serving and selfish. End of story.


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Profile   Post #: 98
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 3:47:07 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline 		Well you ass, I did mean I was sorry for your loss!
Should I have ignored what you said, and said nothing?
 
YOU, DG....have more issues than a magazine!
Now kiss my black ass and goodnight, beach.

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 99
RE: Grief - 2/20/2008 3:50:36 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

Well, I understand it could be a turn off, for some people to have to "hear" about
someone's loss all the time.

Which is one of the reasons I enjoy being single.
 
But on the other hand, is it really for you or anyone else to tell someone that they should
get "over it" or when they should "get over it"?


If someone posts and asks for thoughts? yes it is. That isn't sarcasm that is the fact.

Also woth out getting all mushy, I think Domi cares more than most people give him credit for

Jeff

(in reply to MzMia)
Profile   Post #: 100
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