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RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 3:50:49 PM   
AtlantaMistress


Posts: 276
Joined: 6/14/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: YourDomNow

Ok...Ive got a simple question to anyone willing to speak about it.
Is it really wrong, for a Dom to want to know the first name of the sub/slave he is speaking to?...It doesnt have to be the first email or two, but isnt it logical, normal, and common sense to know who you are talking to after a few weeks?
 
Opinions and thoughts..please


If any REAL communication is going to take place - then I like to know the first name of the person I am corresponding with. I don't think simply a first name is too much of an invasion of privacy, and with so many people that hide behind their keyboard and monitor with no intention of actually going forward, I like to cut to the chase. I use my REAL name - not a scene name. I am Sandy - Mistress Sandy. Trust and communication are the basis to build a relationship, and if you can't even share your first name, you really aren't going anywhere - IMO.


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Mistress Sandy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'd rather be hated for something I am than loved for something I am not.


(in reply to YourDomNow)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 3:50:52 PM   
YourDomNow


Posts: 4170
Joined: 1/24/2008
From: originally TX, now PA
Status: offline
The reason for my posting, was simple..I have been speaking with a 28yr old sub...that when asked more then once, wouldnt give her first name..I like to know WHO im talking to......
I dont think i was missing anything......

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Profile   Post #: 22
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 3:51:23 PM   
TracyTaken


Posts: 615
Joined: 2/1/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: YourDomNow

Would you think age has something to do with this also?


No.  I really think it is probably you.

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 3:52:59 PM   
MidMichCowboy


Posts: 665
Joined: 3/23/2007
Status: offline
I just ducked in here to drop an observation. It amazes me when I read the forums, how some people can't tell the difference between sarcasm and reality.  Back to scheduled programming.

YouDomNow: The ladies want you to show your forcefulness and make them obey. Demand that they give you their name. You should assure them you are not a hatchet killer and want only their fulfillment. That always works.

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I want to capture your mind, your spirit, your soul, your body, your devotion and your love. Then, will I give you my heart.

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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 3:54:03 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline
She's just not that into you.

Cali


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Profile   Post #: 25
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 3:56:06 PM   
TysGalilah


Posts: 589
Joined: 11/21/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: YourDomNow

Would you think age has something to do with this also?

only if shes not old enough to know how to spell or write it


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galilah

.."There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it. " Edith Wharton

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 3:59:24 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline
Dude, it doesn't happen often, but I am lost, and wishing I had this time back

Jeff

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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 3:59:34 PM   
TracyTaken


Posts: 615
Joined: 2/1/2008
Status: offline
quote:

Ive found, alot of the women in the Philadelphia area, sub or slave, are just about instantly turned away in the beginning if bitch, cunt, whore, slut are used directly at them.


Women in Philadelphia actually resist such intellect and charm?  How many times did you try (and did you try all four words) before coming to this conclusion?

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 4:01:34 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TracyTaken

It sounds normal to me (wanting a first name).  Maybe she's just not into you.  To be blunt, your screen name would put me off in a big way. 



Agreed. Also, I'm probably not going to give out my first name until we are talking on the phone - possibly not until we meet up. Aqua will do just fine.

Edited to add: I don't think it has to do with age. It has to do with personal preference. You should respect it, regardless of if the issue is something worth parting over or you are willing to stick around.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 2/20/2008 4:04:33 PM >


_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

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Profile   Post #: 29
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 4:02:28 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
Did you sign your first email with your real name? So why should she offer hers if you didn't lead the way? You aren't saying if you are demanding hers without first telling yours. And yeah, your sn is a big turn off. You don't want to bark orders, you want willing compliance. Doesn't sound like she feels safe yet.

If you like her, then wait a bit and don't push it. Set up a coffee meet and tell her you'll have a white carnation in your buttonhole, which does mean you do have to wear something other than a tee shirt. If she never wants to see you again, then it doesn't matter what her name is, does it? If she feels a connection, then she'll volunteer it.

Some people like to exchange info before meets, others like to reserve it until they know if they'll have a second meet. What's the hurry?

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 4:03:22 PM   
carlie310


Posts: 256
Joined: 9/23/2007
Status: offline
I don't tell people my real first name until I'm at that first meeting for a couple of reasons.  First off, I'm very new at this and haven't found my comfort zone with that.  I have a very unique first name.  And finally, there's that real life drama that I'm going through. All of that makes me very protective of my privacy.

If I had someone badgering me for the information before I was ready, I would use delete/block as my most effective weapon.


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I may not have much real life experience, but I have lots of experience in real life.

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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 4:05:31 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline
Somehow I feel the issues here are deeper than just a name

Jeffff
( my real name, cleverly disguised)

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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 4:06:19 PM   
shysub0951


Posts: 132
Joined: 1/22/2008
Status: offline
i knew my Dom's first name, and he knew mine, after about the 3rd im contact. Now i have other names that he enjoys for me

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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 4:07:23 PM   
TracyTaken


Posts: 615
Joined: 2/1/2008
Status: offline
quote:

Aqua will do just fine


It suits you nicely, going by your posts.  In ancient myth, water was symbolic of women (and there's no body of water referred to as "he" - that I know of).

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 4:09:05 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
Awww, thank you!

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to TracyTaken)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 4:09:13 PM   
TracyTaken


Posts: 615
Joined: 2/1/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

Somehow I feel the issues here are deeper than just a name

Jeffff
( my real name, cleverly disguised)


Deeper than a name?  A roseeee by any other name ...

(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 4:09:51 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

Personally, I prefer "tits." It's funny!

LMAO

Ok...that's a new one on me

TITS? LOL

"hey tits"

LMAO


heh.  If someone called ME 'tits'. I'd be looking around, trying to figure who the hell they were talking to


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polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 4:12:55 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

heh.  If someone called ME 'tits'. I'd be looking around, trying to figure who the hell they were talking to

LOL you realize, don't you, that you have just nicknamed yourself



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Profile   Post #: 38
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 4:13:27 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
*looks around*

Who.... ME???


_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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Profile   Post #: 39
RE: First name basis when talking - 2/20/2008 4:14:24 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

*looks around*

Who.... ME???


Oh hell yea LOL

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If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


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Profile   Post #: 40
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