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RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 4:52:38 AM   
colouredin


Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline 		I just see them all as labels, my problem with this would not have come from her calling herself a slave or her behaviour but the way she spoke about others. I have seen very differant kind of M/s relationships and whatever workds for them works for them I dont see it as something that I should have an opinion on. But if someone starts to insult who I am for whatever reason that would get me frustrated. I know a lot of submissives who "dob" other subs in to their SIrs to get them in trouble, it simply causes back biting and mean ness and doesnt really have much of a point. 

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(in reply to MissAidan)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 5:58:02 AM   
Madame4a


Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline 		I read your post and thought "I know this one, or them"  but I'm sure I don't -- although I'm sure I've met a few like them.  Usually, I tend to refer to them in my head as Slave Master Domly Dom and his Master slave whatever.  That said, we never really know what someone's relationship is until will live it.

Actions speak louder than words.

We all have things we don't like (whatever they might be, someone's kinks or switches) and the polite thing is to keep that to ourselves and not act out accordingly.

I'd love to think she's punished for that behavior, but probably not.

Maybe the Master likes it that way?

It certainly presents a clear model not to follow, if in fact its not for you, or anyone else.

That said, I tend not to comment too much on other's behavior as I really don't know the ins and outs of the relationship but I imagine I would have reacted much the same as you did.


(in reply to MissAidan)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 6:56:02 AM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		There is no need to do anything. Ignore them. Their dynamic is their dynamic. If the rudeness and annoying opinions continue, everyone else will probably, eventually ignore them too.Most people have no tolerance for intolerance..:)

Jeff

(in reply to MissAidan)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 7:02:58 AM   
SubbieOnWheels


Posts: 590
Joined: 12/14/2007
Status: offline 		FR~

I imagine that she went home at the end of the evening and complained to her Master that "Nobody would talk to me after a while. What a stuck-up bunch of snobs!"

Not saying that you are a stuck-up snob, but perception is 98% of one's experience, and she was probably getting a lot of backs turned in her direction, especially as the evening wore on. If they wouldn't see the dynamics of the social interaction, then they were (IMO) incapable of seeing it.

If they ever show up again, you have the option of pretending they're not there. If they don't, well, then they are well and truly out of your life.

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Bethical
Beat me, strike me, take away my reindeer! I'll never tell! -- Walt Kelly, Pogo Possum
I yam what I yam - Popeye

http://www.myspace.com/bethical_wheels


(in reply to Madame4a)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 7:05:03 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		Why would I care at all how she acts/behaves/deals with him.
Its none of my business at all.
Now if she were to step up to the plate towards me, that would be a different ballgame-I would tell her in no uncertain terms to get her ass out of my zone.
But what goes on between her and her master is exactly that,
between her and her master.
As a generality, I tend to find that when people express thoughts and opinions about things that they are not, they more often than not reveal nothing about whatever they are discussing yet reveal much about their character.
Her comments regarding switches have zero to do with what you or anyone else does, but do show her to be shallow, judgemental, closeminded and petty.
But does that make you or any other switch any of those things?
Not unless you choose to allow it to be so.

People like that make me laugh, at them, which I do to their face and if they are silly enough to ask why I am laughing, I tell them.

< Message edited by Kana -- 3/3/2008 7:06:47 AM >

(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 7:05:56 AM   
SassySarijane


Posts: 1558
Joined: 12/20/2007
From: KC Area Missouri
Status: offline 		Their dynamic is their business and I won't say anymore on that, however her described behavior/attitude towards others isn't very nice. I don't have much tolerance for those with an I'm better than you, I know more than you, I'm right/you're wrong one true way kind of attitude, nor do I take it from them when it's directed at me. I can very calmly and sweetly get my point across and then forget their existance. I deal with enough unavoidable drama in my life without that form of it.

< Message edited by SassySarijane -- 3/3/2008 7:07:21 AM >

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(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 7:08:09 AM   
Phoenix2raven


Posts: 347
Joined: 10/14/2006
Status: offline 		I've had the same thing happen time and time again. The thing is they never last very long because nobody likes them. After giving them a chance I speak to the Dom about the subs behavior, ask questions, draw a conclusion then based on what I find I either tell them flat out don't talk to me or invite them to learn. 

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(in reply to Madame4a)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 7:12:37 AM   
sweetnurseBBW


Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline 		Who am I to decide if their dynamic is real, or wrong or right? It might not be what we practice but their life doesn't concern me. I just ignore people I find irritating at munches. If it works for them, then so be it. Their dynamics have no bearing on mine, so why should I care?

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Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to MissAidan)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 7:30:41 AM   
SinergyNstrumpet


Posts: 305
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissAidan

What I want to know is, what do you think of a person who goes around claiming to be this devoted, 24/7 live-in collard slave with behaviour such as this?  Personally, it was all I could do to bite my tongue and hold in my Irish temper.  If it wasn't for my respect for those who run the group, I would have told her how abusred she seemed to me and how what she claimed and what she did didn't quite mix.



I have had similar experiences with people in this kind of dynamic; the Master / slave named couple where the one wears a collar and the other wears a ring through their nose.

So to answer your question, I would not think much of it.  I would not say anything, however, I do not feel it is my place to comment on the dynamics of others.

Hey, it works for them.

Sinergy

(in reply to MissAidan)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 7:33:47 AM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline 		FR

I simply would have smiled at her and told her that I was glad that their arrangement worked for them.  OK I may have been snarky and asked how long it took her to find the one twue path.

Truth be told, people have to find a path that works in achieving their own happiness, I think that lables are superfluous as there are so many shades of grey and not one single dynamic is going to mirror another.

I think people like her are stuck in a catch 22, they are upity towards others and they recieve the cold sholder in return, this reinforces their thoughts that others are nasty/inferiour/stuck-up/_____ and the story gets played out over and over.  One can play into the subconsious manipulation and maintain her paradigm or one can refuse to play that game and throw people like her off kilter.

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Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 7:35:57 AM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		People rarely fit the definitions and ideals of others.

That being said-I would have just ignored this woman as a waste of time.

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I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 7:52:08 AM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline 		at OP
some people like to be more, better, faster then others..in and outside the lifestyle..at least let it look like that... Be glad you wittnessed she wasn't. It would be very satisfying to me, to see her make herself look stupid. She proves she is a 24/7 pain in the ass

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(in reply to Leatherist)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 8:04:31 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		Hmmm....this is an interesting question in many ways.
The OP described a night that we spent with her, and I am the naughty slave. Yes, sometimes I complain about wearing leather and boots...so? Is that someone else's business? That's right, I don't work. I go to school. That's the way He wants it. And I do MANY MANY more things than just laundry for Him. And if I don't like playing ponygirl, well...gosh...I guess I will learn better about who to confide in, huh? (this was all discussed in a lighthearted manner amongst all of us, btw)
It's been over a month and she is still talking about it.
It was a vanilla night, not a munch btw...and HoneyMaster and I have our own rules that we follow. On a vanilla night, I am considered just as much of a 'person' as anyone else.
I was not rude to my Master, and did not insult Him.
Anyone may ask Him if they like.
I *did* drink too much that evening. We hadn't been out alone together in over six months and I did go overboard. (with His encouragement btw)
This person has insulted me since we first began communicating, and is *still* doing so, even though I have made it clear that I am not interested in playing. (which, btw, she asked about a few days after this meeting)
I'm sorry if *our* dynamic doesn't work for you.
It does for us.
We were gracious to her and to hers, had them into our home, bought them drinks and dinner and wrote sincere thank you letters after meeting.
I was dissed and dismissed for my trouble.
And, apparently, still am to this day.
Btw...I do NOT think submissives are just players, I have NO idea where that came from, and what I did say, (several times) is that I don't understand the whole 'switch' dynamic. I am very close to one, and wouldn't trade this person for anything in the world, but...I just don't understand it. I asked for clarification, because I really *am* trying to learn.
I'm sure HoneyMaster will be very interested to learn that not only is this person still insulting me, (for about the fifth time since we've known her) she has now gone to insulting Him, in an open forum, and basically called Him my sub.
As I stated in my journal, the quickest way to get uninvited from our lives, is to insult one of us to the other. This is why we discontinued communication with the OP.
Really, after a month?!! We've moved on, and so should you.




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~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


(in reply to Leatherist)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 8:08:49 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		Christina.

All I can say is KUDOS to you ...LMAO, though, as you probably already know...I still stand by what I said...






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If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 8:11:26 AM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		LOL!!!!!!! I love you

Jeffwey

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 8:12:49 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

LOL!!!!!!! I love you

Jeffwey

HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY WTF???????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



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If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 8:15:30 AM   
colouredin


Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline 		I am glad that we got to hear the other side, which is so rarely the case. I stick by what i said about not judging other peoples dynamics, though now it seems more that it was an open attack more than anything else (posing it on a public board of which you are a frequant poster suggests that) and I think it is very sad that someone needs to do that. 

_____________________________

Resident Lime(y) Tart
There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 8:21:30 AM   
domahpet


Posts: 1505
Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Santa Rosa
Status: offline 		well Christina, it sounds like you are some kinda shit talkin, bad mouthed, disrepsectful drunk.
what to do about it?
wanna come over this weekend???

now that i know who it is, the op sound like another
"oh everyone is so mean to me"
person we had round here... boo hoo
scrape it up chic!
if you wanna call someone out, at least have the balls
to do it by name!

_____________________________

Zeedaddys
~DJ domahpet~
*Love is giving someone the power to break your heart, but trusting them not to*

*crystal*
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(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 8:21:55 AM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		you too....differently..

This thread is the perfect example of not having enough info!

This is a Hall OF Fame Thread

Pete Rose

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: I am what I claim, not what I do - 3/3/2008 8:29:22 AM   
MissHarlet


Posts: 2728
Joined: 9/11/2005
From: El Paso , TX US
Status: offline 		An now we know " The Rest of the Story "

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Protectress of hearts/souls of all submissives calling Bounty's Place home, by order of Bounty~Proprietor

To be respected you must be respectful, to be loved you must be willing to love,
to be trusted you must be willing to trust.

(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 40
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