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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 8:47:48 AM   
RCdc


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SugarMyChurro

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark
Hehe - Ya say Darcy and I are aged and weathered...


No, she said "...twisted and scarred by nature..."

See? Now it makes sense!






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love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 8:48:52 AM   
kittinSol


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quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

You said it a lot better than I did



It's because I'm decrepit :-) .

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 8:54:16 AM   
cjan


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Joined: 2/21/2008
Status: offline 		Btw, I'm not bashing those who have cosmetic surgery, or those who do it. To each their own. I think the question of what one finds beautiful is a much larger one.  I once was overwhelmed watching an ice skating "performance". Made be cry because of the beauty and "expression " of the skater.

Once, on a meditation retreat, I took a walk in the woods ( it was fall in New England ) and was stunned by the beauty of a small red leaf on the ground. I picked it up, groked it, turned it over and saw the dark brown, dead color on the other side. I felt a... disappointment at that moment that still puzzles me. Wtf ? Stimulation junky? Fear of death ? No, I don't fear death, it's nature. What's to fear ?

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 8:55:34 AM   
SinergyNstrumpet


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I will be 40 in a few days... I guess this thread is a timely one for me to read. I work out constantly to attempt to stave off aging. I know it is a losing battle, but I keep trying.

As a younger woman I had a figure that was the envy of many of my friends. I literally caused a traffic accident once. I do not expect to gain attention for how I look anymore, and for some reason it surprises me when I am stopped at the gym, or work, or the store and my looks are commented on or complimented. Maybe I just do not feel beautiful anymore because I am aging? I compare myself with who I was 20 years ago, and I know there is a big difference.

I have come to the place where I seek to please my Daddy first and best. I exercise partially because he approves, and I do feel better... but it is a losing battle. We have both aged a little since we met. I do not find him less appealing for letting his hair go grey or the other little signs of aging. But then again, it is different for men in our culture, unfair, but true

julia

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 8:56:16 AM   
kittinSol


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quote:

ORIGINAL: cjan

Wtf ? Stimulation junky? Fear of death ? No, I don't fear death, it's nature. What's to fear ?



We don't all share the same fears; indeed, it would take a truly wise one to have none at all.

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 8:58:36 AM   
Chloelicious


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From: belgium, Brussels, Forest
Status: offline 		beauty is something that was "made" to fade away but it does not happend all the time.
Talking about actors and their obligation to stay fit, beautifull, non wrinkled; they follow the lead. Some of them Are  to my POV going better by being older:

I found Al pacino really "ugly" when he was younger (just saw stepfather 2 yesterday) now I find him really attractive.

My grandmother died at 85  years old with not much wrinkles and with her hair naturally auburns with a few white one. So not everyone age badly.Don't we say that good people are like good wine; the older, the better.

Talking about plastic surgery:

Until some channel stop broadcastings things like : doctor 90210, the swan, etc we will have to face the urge of plastic surgery.
until people stop writting books about how to change appearance with botox, plastic surgery, collagen injection, etc. I don't talk about people who needed to have a new face because of accident and malformation.

Some celebrities who are "famous" for their beauty did'nt hesitate to have surgery to look better but in fact they look uglyer or worse now: Paris hilton with colllagen injections, Meg ryan (the worse case of all)

We need to live for ourselves for what fits us and stop listening to magazines!!!

I'm not at all happy with my appearance, don't like my nose, my cheeks (only the one from the face, I want to keep my JLO kindastyle big butt)
Wish I could be taller, thiner , had bigger tits but I would not be myself anymore. Anyway I feel the urge to get rid of my"permanent 18 monthes pregnant belly" but only for my own confort.
I got scars that i would have lived without but as you said LaT : it is a part of my story, of who and what I am.




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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:03:48 AM   
RealityLicks


Posts: 1615
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline 		I think there is less an obsession with "beauty" which is after all subjective, but more of a fixation on youth and being slim. 

The Western world is older than it was - the birth rate is slowing so populations are older in average terms.  Most countries  desperately need immigration for this reason.  It is also fatter - we all know about rates of obesity, which continue to increase.  All this makes individuals today overly-conscious of our bodies. 

Beauty is not so immediate.  It can't be assessed as easily in a 3 minute pop promo and is determined in large part by character.  Which is why Mary J Blige is beautiful and Paris Hilton isn't.

this was a general contribution - not sure why it shows as a reply to SMC

< Message edited by RealityLicks -- 3/13/2008 9:09:57 AM >

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:04:12 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
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Status: offline 		I am going to add something that someone reminded me of.

As I said, I am not against plastic surgery. I certainly believe it has it's place and there is one particular surgery I have contemplated myself. I doubt I will ever place it on high enough priority financially to do it, but if the money was available I would investigate it further.

Almost everyone thinks big tata are wonderful, until they age. Have a few kids and BOYYYYYYYY do they age. The crappy part is how much it limits what you can attractively wear. Requires industrial strength undergarments to hold up, etc etc etc. Not to mention, try riding horses with them flailing about on your front. It takes me two sports bras layered to even consider it. So yeah, given the 10 grand or so, I would at least consider having them lifted and shrunk a bit. So no, I understand that many of us have one or two little things we would like tweaked. While I would like to say I am immune to that, I am not and I get it.

It is no different than wanting to wear flattering clothes, cutting your hair in a flattering manner, wearing cosmetics or my personal favourite......jewelry. All about enhancing what you've got.

What I think about when I question plastic surgery are people that are never satisfied. Never seem to achieve that elusive "perfection". Constantly searching for the next thing that will get them there. Wanting to be like an image they have in their head of what perfection is. To me, there is an invisible line between wanting to enhance your own individuality, or make the best of what you have........and making it almost an obsession to be something you cannot because you see no value in yourself without it.

I hope that makes sense. It is almost fuzzy in my own mind. The vague differences between playing up what makes you you, makes you feel just a little better about yourself, or trying to remake yourself entirely.

Again, we all have to do what feels right for us. So none of this is a criticizm of anything anyone does to make their own life more "perfect" to them. Some people need a perfectly clean and tidy home, others don't. Some people need to be perfectly groomed before leaving home, others don't. I emphasize that this is not about criticizing anyone else's choices. Just questioning what drives one particular facet of the world I see around me.


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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:06:56 AM   
sub4hire


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse
Everyday we see examples of "perfect beauty". It is the world we live in. More often, those examples are images either on the television, in print or online. Even as most of us are aware that not only the subject is manipulated, the images themselve always are. We still compare our lives to these images, and all too often, our insecurities find ourselves and our lives lacking. Our homes are not as well decorated or clean. The flowers in our gardens are not as perfect as those on the packets the seeds come in. The food we prepare rarely looks like the example shown with the recipe. And on and on and on.
So why then, for our own attempts at reality do we strive for perfection? Why can't we see more of the beauty in the imperfect in ourselves and our own lives? Why is a scar on our body hideous and something to hide, instead of a celebration of imperfection and survival? Why do we prune and demand the tree in our yard be perfect, yet one that is not, be worthy of a photo in an art gallery?


I've never been one who has followed the beat of anyones drum but my own.  The style that is in today...I deliberately do my own style.  From hair style to clothing and everything else there is.  I don't want to look like one of the herd.  I want to be myself and be happy with whom I am. 
To me beauty is pure.  What we get in nature.  Nothing enhanced.  Just pure unadulterated nature.  The flawed because it was born to be flawed.
However, as far as stars go, until you have met many you have no idea how truly flawed they are.  Make-up and movie magic is an art form all in itself.  There are some pretty plain looking people who are stars.  Yet, beauty is how they make their money.  If make up can't fix their face they must get plastic surgery so make up can fix it again.
We are a superficial country..and superficial pays the bills.
I strive for what I consider beautiful.  Not for what society believes it beautiful.  I'm truly a simple person when it comes to beauty.

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:07:20 AM   
seeksfemslave


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quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol
quote:

ORIGINAL: seeksfemslave
In extremis this obeisance to "glamorous" beauty is a peculiarly American "thing".
It does not exist to anything like the same extent in Europe.
Mid 40's is still quite young and you IMO are still in your prime.

Notwithstanding seeks coarseness, I'll agree with him on the point above. European PEOPLE are much more secure about their looks. Superficial beauty is less of a valuable commodity over there.

You cant just agree with me can you lol.
You use the eff word  far more often than I do. I consider that really coarse.

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:07:23 AM   
kittinSol


Posts: 16926
Status: offline 		For what it's worth, I don't reject the idea of having cosmetic surgery one day, if I feel the need for it... and if I have the dough, obviously.

PS: Seeks... hahaha.

< Message edited by kittinSol -- 3/13/2008 9:08:09 AM >

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:08:54 AM   
cjan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

I think there is a differance between beauty and attractive. I think that these famous, modified people can be seen as attractive but that doesnt make them beautiful. Beautiful is something a little more real, there are beautiful art works or photographs of people but I dont think that means that the person themselves are beautiful.

My sister is very attractive like stupidly so, but she isnt beautiful to me. Beauty for me sort of implies something in the eyes, a mystique and serinity, soul and depth. Someone can be beautiful but not be classically attractive, in my opinion, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nW09gNfLyPc this woman when she smiles I think is one of the most beautiful I have seen, she isnt classically attractive shes a bit bigger and all that, but when she sings songs like this you can tell shes in love, she sings to her husband (the guy on the guitar) and that makes her beautiful to me.

Apperance has become a commodity, we need it, we loathe ourselves if we dont have it, we can buy everything now including a new face. Which I find really sad, Im not classically attractive I am 'pretty' but not turn in the street wolf whistle attractive, and that was a huge issue for me growing up with two very attractive sisters and three very very attractive step sisters, i was always the fat one (still am) but I came to love my curves anyways and as they say its only skin deep.#

Edited to add

I was just talking to my Dad about it, and thought of maralyn now she is attractive, sensual, sexy, appealing all those things but I am not sure I would call her beautiful.



Thanks for the video link, coouredin. I enjoyed it.  Imo, the author of that song, Cindy Lauper, that is, is a great example of a beautiful woman. Why ? Because she is just herself. Honest, passionate, compassionate and, of course, talented.

< Message edited by cjan -- 3/13/2008 9:18:04 AM >

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:10:23 AM   
colouredin


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Status: offline 		glad you enjoyed it :D i really love that version its so moving I think. 

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:14:02 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		That is why corsets rock.  They are sexy and hold me in!
I loathe my 'mummytummy' - but it is there and there is nothing I can do about it. Some people get them, some don't.  Tight tops look so unflattering, even though I feel my boobage rocks and I do not have to wear huge unflattering bras to lift and seperate. - but I do wear sexy bras and like the slut I am, love to show them off.
And seriously - trying to get a good shot with boobs in the way coz ya cannot get close isn't funny.
 
But even though I feel like that, I just couldn't go under the knife.  Darcy wouldn't want me to, and I know he thinks I am beautiful and I think I am blessed in that sense.  My beauty is important to me, but I can say that because I have someone who reaffirms and supports me.  Not everyone has that and as shallow as it may sound, most people want that.
 
the.dark.

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:16:06 AM   
colouredin


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark


  Not everyone has that and as shallow as it may sound, most people want that.

the.dark.


I dont think thats shallow, most people want to be loves, cared for cherished and all that stuff and i think to have that the person has to find you beautiful, whatever the definition of that is to them.


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I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:16:39 AM   
cjan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SugarMyChurro

quote:

ORIGINAL: Owner59
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41APzy5kqBU


Dude, show some class - perhaps a modicum of restraint.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vt1Uj08YhOI



Actually, I liked that vid. And , yes, churros are good. I never (almost) pass up a chance to buy some at a traffic stop when I am in Miami.

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:19:19 AM   
GreedyTop


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DiurnalVampire

Threes a song by Moxy Fruvous that is caled Medicine Show that has a line "It takes work, but it can be done, to look 23 at 51" and "Beauty is something Money buys"
People think that by looking younger, they will somehow feel younger, and last longer, in their industry as long as live longer and better.
I prefer being healthy. I might not be the best looking person out there, but I really dont particularly want to be a fashion model or anyone else who NEEDS their looks to make their money. If I had to worry that the slightest little imperfection could end my career, I suppose I would lose my mind a bit as well. There are some actors and such that have had minor surgeries and look fine, maybe even better. And others who have gone so overboard as to be almost unrecognizable as themselves anymore.

DV



There's a song by the group called The Beautiful South - Prettiest Eyes. It's one of the best love songs I've ever heard. 

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:23:51 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
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From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		OK, I havent read all the responses (a bit under the weather)...

Beauty is (as LaT said) in the imperfections of life, to me. 

THAT being said.. I have a hard time reconciling the image I have of myself in my mind with what I see in the mirror. My mind says I'm still 20something.. the mirror tells me I'm not. I'm having a bit of a hard time with that. Would I do cosmetic surgery? maybe, if I could afford it... I wouldn't mind having a bigger rack..LOL  but even if I did the facial lifts etc, the hands still tell the truth...

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:29:27 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline 		beauty, to this slave, is nature...and the natural look.  No make-up, artificial dye, support garments, spray-tan, botox, lifts or tucks involved, beauty IS there, first thing in the morning...even before you brush your teeth!
 
as the only redhead on the playground, this slave was reminded daily how ugly and freakish she was to her peers(thanks peers!!!) however, socializing with them wasn't important...she eventually came to the understanding that often folks equate unique/different with undesirable/ugly.
 
some folks find red hair/fair(incapable of tanning) skin 100% UGLY, they even wince if forced to look at it...and that's before scars, wrinkles, cellulite or aging even come into play!!!!
 
thanks for the thread, LaTigresse, perspectives on preferences always fascinates!  thankfully, there is no One-True-Way of Beauty, either!!!

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RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? - 3/13/2008 9:31:12 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
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quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark


  Not everyone has that and as shallow as it may sound, most people want that.

the.dark.


I dont think thats shallow, most people want to be loves, cared for cherished and all that stuff and i think to have that the person has to find you beautiful, whatever the definition of that is to them.



Yeah, I don't think it as shallow either, but you often see people advocating personal responsibility.  Yeah - that will be me -  I do it all the time.  Fact is that I still need someone to tell me I am beautiful and I'm not embarressed to admit I want and indeed need that to function in a healthy way.
 
the.dark.

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