Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt...


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... Page: [1] 2 3 4   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 3:57:10 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline 		i started thinking about this while i was reading SteelofUtah's post and how i flirt all the time without thinking about it...like a few weeks ago i was at a meeting and my Owner called me back to him with a sharp "woman" because the week before i had been talking to this guy and apparently i had gotten him all riled up and he didn't want it to happen again (the guy was a newcomer to the program - 12 step meeting, 12 step program - and was looking for anyway to change the way he felt) and all i was going to do was go say hi, see if his week had gone better...i didn't know i had been flirting with huge amounts of sexual under(over?)tones...

anyway...this got me to thinking...is there a level of flirty-ness acceptable for men vs women in this lifestyle? or is it submissives vs dominants? does single vs in a relationship make a difference? is there i only so much societal influence can do before instinct takes over, especially in regards to dominance structure?

i know i have my own views on the subject, but i would like to hear from others before i post them...

take care
chelle

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 4:00:24 PM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline 		I like to flirt a little bit, but would cut some of it out, if I were with someone.
 
Dominants can get away with more of it than submissives, I would guess, due to the power dynamics.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 4:08:34 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Some men like it when their partners flirt and make conquests, and they get to walk out with her knowing they're being envied. Others don't.

Not a lifestyle thing, a compatibility thing.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to Level)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 4:13:44 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline 		assuming this has nothing to do with on-line flirting (i do grope my share of cyber-butt).
Although i am friendly to others..men included..when i am with Sir i would never flirt. I feel it would be disrespectful to him.
Just my 2 pennies.

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 4:25:12 PM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline 		I am not sure about flirting..I like that my girl get attention..but to much makes me jalous.
If it starts to feel uncomfy,,,for whomever participates in the flirt..it should stop.

_____________________________

~Been there, done that, got the t-shirt

(in reply to sirsholly)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 4:35:17 PM   
daddyncherry


Posts: 656
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline 		i admit to having a very distinct lack of boundaries in a sexual kinda way....nothing is off limits for conversation and i NEVER intend it to be flirting at all..i actually don't even realize it if i do because i pretty much will talk about almost anything and answer most any question......To me it is just being straight forward.........

But i will say this much, i make it VERY CLEAR that i am VERY taken and VERY MUCH NOT looking for ANYone....When i talk to people i do it with a certain amount of distance, never falling into the actual flirty type of behavior and if i ever sense for a moment that someone is getting the wrong idea i make sure to mention my Daddy repeatedly and it quells any thoughts from them pretty quickly (as evidenced by the discussion)

_____________________________

Hugs,
cherry

Walking through life, and fear with a smile on my face.
Walking directly through the eye of the hurricane...and through to the other side..without fear....realizing everything will be okay. :)

being obedient 1day at a time

(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 4:37:00 PM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline 		you too??

_____________________________

I did not reply to your cmail.
I am flawed.
Imperfect.
MUST SPANK!!!
SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 5:15:37 PM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline 		oh dear gods.  Daddy says i'm so much of a kitten-in-need-of-pettinses that i cant help being flirty.  i dont mean a thing by it, and i am absolutely in love with and taken and i wouldnt do a thing to damage my relationship(s).

i've been called a butterfly before, also...not something serious, just something that needs to be pretty and fluffy and dont expect anything more than that. 

in any way, i'm generally shocked when someone takes me as being deeper than i appear (although i am! hee!)

kitten

(in reply to faerytattoodgirl)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 5:39:05 PM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline 		I'm a huge flirt... pretty much anywhere, everywhere and in between...

I have no idea what the "rules" may be regarding flirting with the "community"... now ask me if I care.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 5:39:38 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		I am an admitted flirt.  I flirt with males from 4 to 80, and even though I am homophobic I even flirt with females.  But.. I regard it as social interaction.  Engaging someone in personable conversation that makes THEM feel special and valued, and me feel happy.  I see flirting as simply being charming.  I do not see flirting as a road to get me into their bed.
But, if I am with someone I keep close to them.  I may be charming to other people, but not so much that my mate might feel slighted.  For me my mate is main focus and my aim is to make him happy because I am in his life.  So, if my mate wished me to step back, I would be right there at his feet.  Flirting is a social skill, knowing how not to cross the line is a valuable part of learning to be social.
Kyst

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 5:40:17 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chellekitty

i started thinking about this while i was reading SteelofUtah's post and how i flirt all the time without thinking about it...like a few weeks ago i was at a meeting and my Owner called me back to him with a sharp "woman" because the week before i had been talking to this guy and apparently i had gotten him all riled up and he didn't want it to happen again (the guy was a newcomer to the program - 12 step meeting, 12 step program - and was looking for anyway to change the way he felt) and all i was going to do was go say hi, see if his week had gone better...i didn't know i had been flirting with huge amounts of sexual under(over?)tones...

anyway...this got me to thinking...is there a level of flirty-ness acceptable for men vs women in this lifestyle? or is it submissives vs dominants? does single vs in a relationship make a difference? is there i only so much societal influence can do before instinct takes over, especially in regards to dominance structure?

i know i have my own views on the subject, but i would like to hear from others before i post them...

take care
chelle

damn it chelle i thought your post read:
~the guy was a newcomer to the program - 12 step meeting, 12 step program - and was looking for anyway to change the way he felt) and all i was going to do was go say hi, see if his weed had grown better.-
and I thought oh that's a good line.......
xx
yeah must get back into that flirty thang


< Message edited by Prinsexx -- 3/29/2008 5:41:48 PM >

_____________________________

Owner of asterion

Metawhore.... the sound of a metaphore when gagged
Free woman
Resident thread finisher
To my stalker:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LN2lP_7J7GI&feature=fvwrel

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 6:16:47 PM   
ToysAndTies


Posts: 124
Joined: 5/20/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

I am an admitted flirt.  I flirt with males from 4 to 80, and even though I am homophobic I even flirt with females.  But.. I regard it as social interaction.  Engaging someone in personable conversation that makes THEM feel special and valued, and me feel happy.  I see flirting as simply being charming.  I do not see flirting as a road to get me into their bed.
But, if I am with someone I keep close to them.  I may be charming to other people, but not so much that my mate might feel slighted.  For me my mate is main focus and my aim is to make him happy because I am in his life.  So, if my mate wished me to step back, I would be right there at his feet.  Flirting is a social skill, knowing how not to cross the line is a valuable part of learning to be social.
Kyst


Very well put.  I find that being likeable, interesting, and complimentary tend to bunch me in the flirty category.  The same actions that I consider simple politeness and positivity are viewed by others as advances or at times inappropriate.  Doesn't work on cops for me though...maybe I still need more practice....

(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 6:20:04 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		Your thread name cracked me up! I didnt know there was a 12 step program called Flirters Anonymous?

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to ToysAndTies)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 9:26:33 PM   
lronitulstahp


Posts: 5392
Joined: 10/17/2007
Status: offline 		i flirt...it keeps the juices flowing.  Even when i'm in a relationship. Flirting however, isn't the same as cheating...and i know how to draw the line between cute, and inappropriate.  Babies, old people dogs...even cats, and we know how picky THEY are...most people and animals just like my sweet ass...and i like 'em back.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 10:05:25 PM   
Gwynvyd


Posts: 4949
Status: offline 		*huggles Chelle*

Ya know there are some wankers out there that are soooooooo desperate for female attention that the fact you said Hi, How are you doing? and acted concerned for thier well being must mean that you want to marry them and have 3-4 kids.. or at least fuck thier brains out. Some times when this is not the case they get thier dick all in a knot and take it to your friends or boyfriend. "The big bad girl teased me.. Waaaaaah"  ( Can you tell I have had this happen to me? *chuckles* )

then again some of us are natural flirt with everything that has a pulse (waves hello) types... some people just are not comfortable with that. In a serious relationship I tend to tone it down a lot. Those who usualy have groping rights.. get them revoked if my other half isnt down with it. Nothing like stanbding next to your girlfriend durring a grab fest and notice a line forming. so not cool for you ya know?

I do however let the people I am even thinking of being involved with know that I am a *huge* flirt.. and that is not going to change. I will not stiffle my personality. I will tone it down a notch or 5 so they are comfy.. but not totaly.

Asking some dude how he is because you were generaly concerned and because he took it as a flirt I do not see as your issue. I see as his lack of common sense. If you had been friendly to see if you could get him to open up in the group that is a good thing... people esp. the ones with dangling participles can be such silly creatures and get all worked up over the most innocent and silliest of things.

Good luck on your Owner accepting you for the wonderful creature we all know you are. *hugs*

Gwyn 



_____________________________

Self avowed Geek-Girl~
Come for the boobs, stay for the brains.

Be the kinda woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the Devil says "Oh shit, shes awake..."
~ Softandshy's "Shiney"

(in reply to lronitulstahp)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 10:17:03 PM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline 		*re-reads Gwyn's post*

"dangling participles"????

*rolls about on the floor laughing*

whew, i needed that!!

kitten

(in reply to Gwynvyd)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 11:06:23 PM   
Kirren


Posts: 580
Joined: 9/5/2007
Status: offline
quote:


anyway...this got me to thinking...is there a level of flirty-ness acceptable for men vs women in this lifestyle? or is it submissives vs dominants? does single vs in a relationship make a difference? is there i only so much societal influence can do before instinct takes over, especially in regards to dominance structure?



I think that as long as there are men and women, there will always be a difference in what is acceptable in who can flirt, how much, how often, and just plain how.

For men, and Doms for sure, (IMO so dont shoot Me okay? I like living)  flirting is a way of seeing what they can do. Lets take My Husband D, He flirts with anything that has boobs and moves. It makes Me insane...I can not stand it. But I dont get mad because I flirt. Now...heres the thing...I catch Him flirting with some elf in WOW...(His pc is right next to Mine) and I should keep My mouth shut...He catches Me flirting and its ON...and I do mean on...Dont ask Me why...I dont have  a reason for that. I dont even think He does. I can only assume it is a possessiveness thing...Him saying "You are Mine and thats how its gonna be..." When in reality...which He seldom visist....I belong to Me, and I do flirt,...I am after all a very sexual person, and flirting is a very sexual game with Me... To Me...its more about the intellectual thing...This is because I am more intellectually driven...if some one can catch My mind...The rest of Me will follow. I dont think its the same for men.

I read once that men are very visual and women tend to be more auditory...Men get turned on by what they see...women by what they hear...I think this is true.

Is there a difference in the way people flirt when they are single and when they are in a relationship? Lol. Depends on who you are...when I was single, Id ask..."wanna go get a coke or fuck or something?" Now I just make sly lil comments. I think its a safe thing....

With subs and Dom's yeah its a different ball game...subs should only be concerned with the needs and desires of their Dominant. They should not be flirting with any one else, or trying to catch any one elses eye....Doms can if they want to...Im guessing because they say so...I dont really have a reason for that. I have D and I have kitten...I dont think I can handle any more at the moment.

I dont think its societal influence, I think its base sexual or mental attraction that makes people flirt. Its just part of how we figure each other out.

_____________________________

Everything has been said before
There's nothing left to say anymore
When it's all the same
You can ask for it by name


Did I fail to mention...I am a BITCH?

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 11:10:53 PM   
Phin


Posts: 1802
Joined: 2/26/2007
Status: offline 		chelle, a flirt? noooo.... and I am not either...

who gives a flip about the acceptable level of flirtyness in the lifestyle, talk to your Owner and find the acceptable level of flirtyness in your relationship

quote:

ORIGINAL: Gwynvyd

they get thier dick all in a knot

damn that hurts just thinking about it...

new pics to perve on 2 profiles... very hot, chelle and faery

_____________________________

"Isn't wonderful when our bruises show what we hide in the back of our heads?"Fayetteville band, Nephilym

"He is my angel, my devil, my naughty boy, but above anything else my Master"My girl sin

(in reply to Gwynvyd)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 11:17:30 PM   
Gwynvyd


Posts: 4949
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: adoracat

*re-reads Gwyn's post*

"dangling participles"????

*rolls about on the floor laughing*

whew, i needed that!!

kitten


Happy to help.. that is just one of the many names we have for it here.

Gwyn

_____________________________

Self avowed Geek-Girl~
Come for the boobs, stay for the brains.

Be the kinda woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the Devil says "Oh shit, shes awake..."
~ Softandshy's "Shiney"

(in reply to adoracat)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... - 3/29/2008 11:26:49 PM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Gwynvyd

quote:

ORIGINAL: adoracat

*re-reads Gwyn's post*

"dangling participles"????

*rolls about on the floor laughing*

whew, i needed that!!

kitten


Happy to help.. that is just one of the many names we have for it here.

Gwyn


and its absolutely wonderful!

kitten, still giggling

(in reply to Gwynvyd)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2 3 4   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> hi, my name is chelle, and i am a flirt... Page: [1] 2 3 4   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.219