RE: can you write a greeting card?

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/26/2008 10:50:12 PM

dcnovice

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Little sub, 'tis pure elation
How you take humiliation.

_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/26/2008 10:54:42 PM

Emperor1956

Posts: 2370
Joined: 11/7/2005
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Hmmm. well its a bit early, but there are certainly Holiday cards that need to be sent:

Ho Ho Ho!
Its big Daddy Dom Clause
He's here to mark your ass up
With his favorite Christmas tawse.
________

On this Chanukah, the feast of Light
Some eat potato pancakes
But I know you'd rather be bound tight
And get whipped until your back aches.
___________

Black, Red and Green
are the colors of the season
But black and blue
are My colors for you
Hope your Kwanzaa beating is pleasin'.

E.

_____________________________

"When you wake up, Pooh," said Piglet, "what's the first thing you say?"
"What's for breakfast? What do you say, Piglet?"
"I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?"
Pooh nodded thoughtfully.
"It's the same thing," he said.

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 7:41:41 AM

rubberpet

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From: The Land of Voodoo
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Tada!!! It's rubberpet...please, hold your applause!

***realizes no one gives a shit***

Anyway, here are my contributions at this...Hallmark, eat your heart out!

You said you would die without me....
You fucking tease! You say it, but you don't mean it!
Hell, you never meant it!

If I had a nickel for everytime
I wished your love was still mine...
I'd have one fucking dime!

When I took you home last night,
you reminded me of Halle Berry...
This morning was a fucking nightmare
'cause you look like Chuck Berry!

You say I never whisper sweet nothings in your ear
You say I never write you poetry that rhymes...
Well try finding something that sounds like "cock juggling thundercunt"
and rhyme it in real-time!

Roses are red
violets are blue...
Let's get a bucket of chicken and get busy!

Dearest Mama...

You're gonna be a grandma again
for time number three.....
Daddy may be the father again,
but, at least this time, he fucked me for free!

You may be dumb as a post,
heck, sometimes you even smell...
but who needs brains when you can suck a cock so well!

Happy Anniversary, snookums!

Some things in this world
make you scratch your head...
But when I look at the little fucker in that crib,
it makes me wonder why I ever took you to bed!

In the beginning, you were beautiful as an angel...
now you haunt my house 'cause you look like a specter...
I wish I could feed your fucking ass
to Hannibal Lecter!!!

That's all for now, peeps...I hope you enjoy!!!

_____________________________

Collared and devoted property of Mistress Lorelei (vampchick88) as of 3/26/08.

Rubberpet - The Resident Anti-Subby and mysterious shadowy figure known as Voodoo, proud hitman and wiseguy for the Subby Mafia.

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Post #: 23

RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 7:47:30 AM

TJsCheekypet

Posts: 109
Joined: 4/18/2008
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taking it up the ass,
surely something will come to pass,
it may be shit,
it may be sore,
but congratulations you anal whore!

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my words are just my two cents, my opinions. Not words to live by & not set in stone.

previously known as 'blissy'/now Sir T.J's pet

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 7:57:00 AM

Daddysredhead

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From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
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DC... you have a gift.

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Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 7:57:09 AM

Lucylastic

Posts: 40310
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quote:

ORIGINAL: rubberpet

You say I never whisper sweet nothings in your ear
You say I never write you poetry that rhymes...
Well try finding something that sounds like "cock juggling thundercunt"
and rhyme it in real-time!

Nose Enema at this one
ow ow ow that really bloody hurt,
Lucy

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(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 8:06:42 AM

SteelofUtah

Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
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Okay I had to "Borrow" some stuff to get the sentiment I wanted but here goes MY Greeting Card.

~~Front of Card~~~

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with my lord.

Many scenes from my life flashed across my mind.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.

Sometimes there were two sets of footprints, other times there was one only.

This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life, when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat, I could see only one set of footprints, so I said to my Lord,

“You promised me Master,that if I followed you, you would walk with me always.

But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there has only been one set of footprints in the sand. Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?”

~~Inside of Card~~~

Her Master replied, “Silly girl don't you remember? The years when you have seen only one set of footprints, my little one, is when I Hog Tied and Ball Gaged you and carried you like a suitcase.”

I thought this would be a sweet sentiment. What do you think?

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 8:08:04 AM

camille65

Posts: 5746
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From: Austin Texas
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Oh Steel I loved that one!

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~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 8:15:08 AM

SteelofUtah

Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
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This one is ALL me baby

~~Front of Card~~~

There are times in our lives when we feel lonely.

When we feel like the only ones in the room,

When we feel like nothing we are doing is touching others

When the Idea of another moment alone is just unbearable.

~~Inside of Card~~~

Then someone accidently flicks thier cigerette ash, or spills thier drink on your back while you are serving as a coffee Table and leans down and says "You moved you worthless cunt!!" and everything is right again.

So how many of you can relate

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 9:46:18 AM

rubberpet

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From: The Land of Voodoo
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

quote:

ORIGINAL: rubberpet

You say I never whisper sweet nothings in your ear
You say I never write you poetry that rhymes...
Well try finding something that sounds like "cock juggling thundercunt"
and rhyme it in real-time!

Nose Enema at this one
ow ow ow that really bloody hurt,
Lucy

Sorry Lucy...let me get you a towel to clean your monitor.

Here's another you may like.....

If you come in contact with my ex,
run away if you see her,
I just shook her hand
and still caught gonnorhea!!!

_____________________________

Collared and devoted property of Mistress Lorelei (vampchick88) as of 3/26/08.

Rubberpet - The Resident Anti-Subby and mysterious shadowy figure known as Voodoo, proud hitman and wiseguy for the Subby Mafia.

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 11:20:57 AM

dcnovice

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quote:

Well try finding something that sounds like "cock juggling thundercunt"
and rhyme it in real-time!

Thanks for the shock, struggling wonderment
As I invaded your cock-juggling thundercunt.
How you fought all through our session
Yet surrendered at last, my possession.

_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 11:25:56 AM

dcnovice

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Daddysredhead

DC... you have a gift.

Thanks, Red! I'm not sure it's the one I'd have picked, given a choice, but it's what the fates gave me.

_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 12:39:25 PM

dcnovice

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You sure make me randy,
You scrumptious eye candy.

_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 12:46:41 PM

christine1

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From: i'm headed to HIM...
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Because i care to send the very best,
i better be able to fucking molest!

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i am woman! er, godzilla! hear me roar!

http://wavcentral.com/cgi-bin/log/log.cgi?id=2856&sound=/sounds/movies/godzilla/roar.mp3

He's the "boom" overwhelming...

He is my Master, my lover, my best friend my everything.

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 1:17:36 PM

dcnovice

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Accept wishes good, true, and hearty
For your first visit to a play party!

_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 4:46:25 PM

Lumus

Posts: 5968
Joined: 9/16/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: christine1

Because i care to send the very best,
i better be able to fucking molest!

Do you fit in the postbox?

[And in the back of my mind lurks Butthead..."Huh-huh, huh-huh...he said, 'box'."

Sigh. Damned voices.]

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<Talk to educate; listen to learn.>

~ the other half of "L&L" ~

I have been dubbed the Rainmaker. Do not make me take your water for my tribe.

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 4:58:55 PM

MontrealPhoenix

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Joined: 2/27/2008
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ROTFL, this is the best yet. You have a real knack for this you should come up with your own line of BDSM cards..

Phoenix

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"Only in a collar can a woman be truly free"
~Tribesmen of Gor ..pg 75

"He who ties a woman owns her"
~Guardsman Of Gor pg 267

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 6:03:14 PM

vampchick88

Posts: 346
Joined: 4/10/2007
Status: offline

Roses are Red
Violets are Blue
I'm your secret stalker
and I'll kill for you

~Lorelei

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Proud owner of rubberpet, the best investment of my time, trust, and heart that any Domme could ever dream of.

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 6:07:54 PM

dcnovice

Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
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quote:

You have a real knack for this you should come up with your own line of BDSM cards..

Thanks! You know, I have been wondering what to do with the second half of my career . . .

_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

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RE: can you write a greeting card? - 4/27/2008 6:42:13 PM

rubberpet

Posts: 1743
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Oil can be slippery
but rotten fish will smell...
if you don't like my greeting cards
you can all go to hell!

_____________________________

Collared and devoted property of Mistress Lorelei (vampchick88) as of 3/26/08.

Rubberpet - The Resident Anti-Subby and mysterious shadowy figure known as Voodoo, proud hitman and wiseguy for the Subby Mafia.

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