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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 3:18:29 PM   
impossiblesub


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 If you show interest in them (by looking at them, flirting, etc) they are going to think you are interested. Don't show interest if you are not interested, and if they continue then Tell them you are not interested and don't encourage their advances.

< Message edited by impossiblesub -- 4/27/2008 3:27:24 PM >

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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 3:25:57 PM   
UBERMUNSCHIST


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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Say "No thank you".  See situation solved.

As far as a ltr goes, at 19 how long a relationship are you talking about? 3 months, 3 years, decades, forever? Because the truth is that at your age a person does better to date many different people. The reason for this is that you ought to be keeping a list of what were the characteristics or qualities a person had that caused you to be attracted to them as well as what were the reasons you broke up. Obviously until you are exposed to something you won't know that you like or hate it.

You're creating your own little statistical universe here. Wanting someone to be a self professed submissive isn't enough. Neat freak? Night owl? Artistic vs practical? Sleep with the window open or shut?

Now if you want to know why none of your past gfs are still with you, ask them if you're still in contact. Or ask friends of the opposite sex who will put up with stuff from you as a friend that they won't do in a relationship.


Cool. I didn't think of it that way. You make it seem like shopping!

By the way, what I mean by "long term" is somewhere between six months to a year.

< Message edited by UBERMUNSCHIST -- 4/27/2008 3:34:03 PM >


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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 3:34:57 PM   
impossiblesub


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By the way, watch out with that. By the way, watch out with that. Some of them may get pissed because you turn them down and try to get even.

< Message edited by impossiblesub -- 4/27/2008 3:39:58 PM >

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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 3:38:13 PM   
UBERMUNSCHIST


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quote:

ORIGINAL: impossiblesub
By the way, watch out with that. Some of them may get pissed because you turn them down and try to get even.


Which has happened before. The old saying is true: "Hell hath no fury...

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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 3:41:29 PM   
impossiblesub


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I would suggest finding out as soon as possible if they are married or whatever. Then if they are just put a halt to everything. Politely.
"Oh, what a shame it is you are married. You are such an attractive woman. *pretend disappointment* Oh well, nice to meet you."
Giving them a compliment will help keep them from getting angry.

< Message edited by impossiblesub -- 4/27/2008 3:56:41 PM >

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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 3:48:51 PM   
GimpinDenial


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<grabs coffee, sits back and relaxes to watch the show >

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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:02:02 PM   
UBERMUNSCHIST


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quote:

ORIGINAL: impossiblesub
I would suggest finding out as soon as possible if they are married or whatever. Then if they are just put a halt to everything. Politely.
"Oh, what a shame it is you are married. You are such an attractive woman. Oh well *feign disappointment* , nice to meet you."
Giving them a compliment will help keep them from getting angry.


I'm not a very good actor, and I'm not going to lie, they aren't all attractive.  

I wish I could do this.  


< Message edited by UBERMUNSCHIST -- 4/27/2008 4:03:27 PM >


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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:04:07 PM   
GreedyTop


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practice saying it... if you can say it, with some degree of sincerity, chances are they'll feel better about the rejection (and if they ARENT particularly attractive, or don't feel like they are, then you'll have brightened someones day)

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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:07:26 PM   
Level


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"Get away from me, loathsome creature from the deep" won't make their day brighter?
 
OP, make it short and sweet. Tell them that it's not what you're looking for, but thank them for the interest.

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Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:11:09 PM   
domiguy


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Most of them are probably unfuckable anyways...Just make it clear in your profile what you are seeking...If somone responds to you that does not meet your criteria..Just ignore it..Delete it "unread." This will send a fairly strong message.

And to Msstarlet....For me "it is a lot about the sex"...should we say that all together?

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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:11:31 PM   
impossiblesub


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Just ignore them completely if they are not attractive. Usually women (or men) don't throw themselves at you unless you do something to encourage it. 

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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:13:48 PM   
Prinsexx


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quote:

ORIGINAL: UBERMUNSCHIST

I have been unintentionally attracting the wrong type of women (women between the ages of 25 - 35); almost all of the women who "come onto me" want to cheat on their husbands, fiancés or life long boyfriend.

I feel very bad for the men who are involved with these women; but these men are not loser's either. They have great jobs and high paying salaries. I'm a college student and I'm only 19!!!

The younger women have boyfriends that aren't necessarily successful in the financial world like the older men, but they are extremely attractive (you know the whole "metro" thing).  

Obviously if I was the "flingy" type I wouldn't even be typing this, however I'm not ( I want a monogamous long-term relationship ) and I would like to know...

What am I doing wrong?

Join match.com
They have a free offer or money back guarantee or 6 months free membership or other inducement if you don't meet that special someone to whom you are glued eye ball to eye ball.



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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:18:18 PM   
angelikaJ


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Since you are talking about in real life and not here... a simple "[you] are not willing to be the other man...Karma is a bitch"...is pretty direct.

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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:29:58 PM   
ResidentSadist


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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:34:17 PM   
Poetryinpain


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OP - no need to be dishonest. Just be direct without being hurtful.

I'm sorry - I'm the monogamous sort, and I like my partner to be monogamous as well - with me.

I'm a one-woman man, and I expect my woman to be a one-man woman.

I value honesty and integrity. If there's another man in the picture, I am not interested.

There are any number of things you can say that will let a woman know that it's not necessarily that she's not attractive (whether she is or not), but that it's the presence of the other man in her life that is the main reason for your not continuing the relationship.

Keep looking, young man. Somewhere out there is a sweet young sub who is looking for the violence you propose. But bear in mind that your profile comes on pretty strong, and if you come on that strong in person, you might be scaring away the very sweet young things you are looking for.

pip, feeling like an auntie today


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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:36:00 PM   
UBERMUNSCHIST


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quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop
practice saying it... if you can say it, with some degree of sincerity, chances are they'll feel better about the rejection (and if they ARENT particularly attractive, or don't feel like they are, then you'll have brightened someones day)


Do women really enjoy sincere compliments?

I never say them.


I don't want to come off as cheesy.

"Those are skin tight. How do you get into those pants baby?" - Austin Powers 

< Message edited by UBERMUNSCHIST -- 4/27/2008 4:37:44 PM >


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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:48:03 PM   
MstrFury


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[By the way, what I mean by "long term" is somewhere between six months to a year. ]


and here I'm thinking long term is the 30+ I've been working on....oh well
 
 
pulling my cloak around me and steping back into the shadows



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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:52:10 PM   
UBERMUNSCHIST


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Poetryinpain

OP - no need to be dishonest. Just be direct without being hurtful.

I'm sorry - I'm the monogamous sort, and I like my partner to be monogamous as well - with me.

I'm a one-woman man, and I expect my woman to be a one-man woman.

I value honesty and integrity. If there's another man in the picture, I am not interested.

There are any number of things you can say that will let a woman know that it's not necessarily that she's not attractive (whether she is or not), but that it's the presence of the other man in her life that is the main reason for your not continuing the relationship.

Keep looking, young man. Somewhere out there is a sweet young sub who is looking for the violence you propose. But bear in mind that your profile comes on pretty strong, and if you come on that strong in person, you might be scaring away the very sweet young things you are looking for.

pip, feeling like an auntie today


This is a great post! Thank You!

If my profile scares people away, good. This is how I am, it's no facade. 

The timid need not apply; however, I have been working on becoming more approachable (in real life) and pleasant.

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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:55:21 PM   
UBERMUNSCHIST


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrFury

[By the way, what I mean by "long term" is somewhere between six months to a year. ]


and here I'm thinking long term is the 30+ I've been working on....oh well
 
 
pulling my cloak around me and steping back into the shadows


Well if you're in "love" with someone that's different; it should last as long as the "love" lasts.

If you're just dating, I say that 1 year is sufficient.

< Message edited by UBERMUNSCHIST -- 4/27/2008 4:59:39 PM >


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RE: Attraction - 4/27/2008 4:58:11 PM   
Level


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Being approachable is good; you don't want that well you're digging to turn into dank, lonely hole.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

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