Owner4SexSlave
Posts: 1311
Joined: 4/4/2007 Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Prinsexx quote:
Basically, I just was not into being a Bottom to the things she wanted to do to me!!! Geeeshh.. Really is that simple. Ok, so I explained a few things, I thought would enlighten her. That's why I explained what I did, to enlighten her. She was fixated upon this notion or idea about doing certain things to me! Sorry! Is Not happening! If this makes me seem like an asshole to anybody, screw it! The moment that someone who feels they are emlightening me gets angry I lose respect. Anger is just a tactic we all use when we cannot control a situation. I'm a nother so I understand this. I try to enlighten my kids sometimes: you know because I have been a kid myself. The very momet I get angry with them I have lost. More than anything bdsm isn't about control, changing their(kinky non-lifestylers, kinky vanillas,choose-anothr-label) beliefs or enlightening them. it isn't about controlling someone's reactions. For a dominant this must be a very hard lesson to learn. It must be the core paradox itself. If anything might i suggest, from a submissive's point of biew that domination is about containingg my reactions rather than controlling them (If I didn't wrythe or scream or protest or lip back or resist, at leat a little, I would just be passive rather than submissive.) In parental terms when my kids kisk iff it's about me providing a safe home environment for them to kick off in, ther's the analogy. You can't control what she said you said she said she said she said and so forth. And in any case even if she said you said she said you said: really? Prinsexx, I was not angry with her that night. In fact, Hell I was not angry with her until after I found out she was starting to stir up things. This is when I got Angry.. yes pissed. You are reading a negative connotation into a simple word I used "Enlighten", this word does not express anything negative. It's simply a matter of sharing with somebody a little more detail for the sake of insight. She did not grasp the polite meaning of "No I'm not into that", she pushed things. I decided and felt it best at the time to explain it to her. Thought it would make it even clearer to her that I had no interest. Keep in mind I am posting on here in retrospect to the events that unfolded. Yes, I'm a little pissed. Make me feel a little fucked with. I was polite, I went so far to give her an honest to goodness explaination. Hell, she did not even know what a Dom or submissive or a switch was until that night. Think it's clear I did enlighten her somewhat, regardless of how she views things. At least it's something that will stay in her mind. Perhaps one day she will come across something posted on the internet. She might gain an even higher understanding. Who the hell knows. I have no control over what she thinks, feels or says. Now, some people have made posts in regards to how they have dealt with people when it comes to explaining things to them. Some people simply don't at all. It's a bit of a risk whenever you go there. In retrospect, if I had to do it all over again. I just might have excused myself and blew her off and went home. Just said thank you but no thank you. Now I suppose this might have lead to having to deal with a few phone call from her afterwards. Don't know. I can't change what was said and done. As somebody pointed out, this just might be a good time to see who is or not really my friend. So perhaps some good will come of all this madness. One thing is for certain, just because somebody is kinky does not mean they are open minded about "the lifestyle" on a whole. In some regards, yes, I shared something with her with a measure of hopeful trust. Was not expecting her to go running around town going blah blah blah, even more so with the spin job she was making out of it. The one good thing is that I've been out of the closet with my close friends, They know about it. Anyways, I really was not prepared for this one. Sort of caught me off guard. Really did not make my day finding out about all this. I have read some really excellent responses from people, with great advice, thoughts on the subject. How the do or not do it. Even some advice on how to deal with it now. However I know myself, if she keeps this up... I'll probally chew her ass up grass in a lawn mower cranked up to the Rabbit setting. At times that's the about the only way some people gain respect for you. But that's another twisted topic in itself. Getting angry does not mean you have lost, unless you loose control of yourself when angry! Being angry in my opinion, experience and POV is a perfectly acceptable and normal human reaction. Long as I maintain control, don't go off killing somebody, start breaking things, and going off the deep end hitting anybody. Hey she was pushing the shock collars and crop my ass thing on me. Now, she's pushing things around in social circles. Thinks this alone says a lot about her. I wonder how many other people have went through similar experiences with her. Mmmmm... interesting. Something tells me I'm not the only one.
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