Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

different ways to address a submissive


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> different ways to address a submissive Page: [1] 2 3   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 10:35:59 AM   
KindLadyGrey


Posts: 358
Joined: 11/6/2007
Status: offline 		I love the current thread on different ways to address a Domme. There were a lot of really good suggestions made, some of which were really original. There have been other threads on that topic, but I haven't seen so many original and really thoughtfully lovely replies on it before. I gravitate toward threads with kawaii value, so here's another:

Let's do it the other way around. How do you address your submissive? I've heard boy, puppy, pet, and similar things. There seem to be a lot of different ways to address different sorts of people in this lifestyle. What's your favorite? What do you call your submissive? What do you generally call other submissives you meet until a preferred mode of address is established?





I tend to address unattached male submissives as boy, and unattached female submissives as sweetheart. I'm quite sexist, actually, although it isn't premeditated. If there are objections to those modes of address I don't insist on them, but they tend to be my defaults when meeting a new person in a submissive context.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 10:52:33 AM   
aidan


Posts: 904
Joined: 5/28/2005
Status: offline 		Mistress calls me a variety of things during play, but the most common day-to-day thing is "boykin". It doesn't mean anything, just a cute nickname that She started using when we first started talking to each other. I love it because of it's "kawaii value", and because it's something that nobody else is called and She came up with just for me.

She also refers to me as Her rogue, because...well, a lot of reasons, two of which are my impish sense of humor and affinity for knives. *grins slyly* 

_____________________________

Do what now?

"I aim to misbehave."
-Mal Reynolds

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 11:22:34 AM   
ThundersCry


Posts: 892
Status: offline 		whore....works.

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 11:25:39 AM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline 		that'll be $150 pig...pay up.. 

_____________________________

I did not reply to your cmail.
I am flawed.
Imperfect.
MUST SPANK!!!
SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

(in reply to ThundersCry)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 11:28:19 AM   
KindLadyGrey


Posts: 358
Joined: 11/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

Thunders Cry said. . .

whore. . .works.



My whore doesn't. She's fuckin' lazy. I don't even know why I keep the bitch on the payroll ;)

And aiden, that's exactly the sort of personalized thing I'm talking about and was hoping people would share on this thread. Boykin, so cute! (Also, it reminds me I owe you $20. . crap, where was that other thread again. . .)

(in reply to ThundersCry)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 11:33:37 AM   
tsatske


Posts: 2037
Joined: 3/9/2007
From: Louisville, KY
Status: offline
quote:

I tend to address unattached male submissives as boy, and unattached female submissives as sweetheart. I'm quite sexist, actually, although it isn't premeditated. If there are objections to those modes of address I don't insist on them, but they tend to be my defaults when meeting a new person in a submissive context.


I'm just curious - if you met an unattached (or attached but not to you) Black submissive male, would you call him boy? Just wondering because, on the one hand, i think boy has some strong positive connotations in the kink world, and, otoh, some strong negitive conotations in the African American culture.

_____________________________

“If you never did you should. These things are fun and fun is good”
~Dr. Seuss quote

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 11:42:58 AM   
KindLadyGrey


Posts: 358
Joined: 11/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tsatske

quote:

I tend to address unattached male submissives as boy, and unattached female submissives as sweetheart. I'm quite sexist, actually, although it isn't premeditated. If there are objections to those modes of address I don't insist on them, but they tend to be my defaults when meeting a new person in a submissive context.


I'm just curious - if you met an unattached (or attached but not to you) Black submissive male, would you call him boy? Just wondering because, on the one hand, i think boy has some strong positive connotations in the kink world, and, otoh, some strong negitive conotations in the African American culture.


Holy crap, I never even thought about that. boy has such a totally different connotation in this lifestyle. I have called black submissive men "boy" before. Oh god, I hope they were not terribly insulted.



I'll definitely think twice before doing that again. Maybe sweetheart can just be universal. I call the boys that too sometimes when I'm in a good mood :)

< Message edited by KindLadyGrey -- 6/13/2008 11:43:34 AM >

(in reply to tsatske)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 12:06:16 PM   
DominantJenny


Posts: 645
Joined: 4/6/2008
Status: offline 		I call mine slaveboy most of the time, as well as slut, etc, when I feel like it.
I don't call others anything based on their D/s status...I will refer to people that I like as sweetheart, sweetie, hon, etc, if I don't think they'll be offended. (Though I'm sometimes wrong. *pout*)

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 12:13:11 PM   
ThundersCry


Posts: 892
Status: offline 		Pig works as...well...
 
As for the 150 bones...
 
Come and get...it <g>

(in reply to faerytattoodgirl)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 12:35:44 PM   
Madame4a


Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline 		boy
mine
darling boy

_____________________________

You're crazy bitch
But you f*ck so good, I'm on top of it
When I dream, I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 12:42:56 PM   
darchChylde


Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline 		Ma'am generally just calls me oren; though occasionally "my pet", which gives a very warm feeling even though most often it's said in reference to me as opposed as to me.  She also sometimes refers to me as "the boychild", which i kind of like for the cuteness factor.  Most often, online atleast; She simply calls me sweets.


_____________________________

I'm the man your mother warned you about...
if only to keep me to herself.

I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
.
Where the fuck do I post?

Proud Owner and Protector of chyldeschylde.

(in reply to Madame4a)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 1:06:20 PM   
Wheldrake


Posts: 477
Status: offline 		Foreign languages can offer some interesting possibilities in this context. My Mistress often calls me "hamba", which apparently means "slave" in her native language (Malay). At least, that's what she's always told me it means - I've never looked it up, so I hope it's not actually the Malay word for "imbecile" or "cesspool". I call her "puan" in return,  which is more or less like calling her "ma'am". In any case, it comes in handy that we can call each other "puan" and "hamba" in the middle of a crowd of English or Chinese speakers (I live in Beijing) without anyone suspecting that they're something other than terms of endearment.

(in reply to darchChylde)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 2:42:31 PM   
khantengri


Posts: 23
Joined: 6/8/2008
Status: offline 		I call my submissive 'creature' and 'pet, as well as just 'Josh' or 'Joshy'. I prefer to call other submissives by their first name, or by another personal nickname of theirs. 

(in reply to Wheldrake)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 3:27:09 PM   
Skully7000


Posts: 377
Joined: 7/22/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tsatske

quote:

I tend to address unattached male submissives as boy, and unattached female submissives as sweetheart. I'm quite sexist, actually, although it isn't premeditated. If there are objections to those modes of address I don't insist on them, but they tend to be my defaults when meeting a new person in a submissive context.


I'm just curious - if you met an unattached (or attached but not to you) Black submissive male, would you call him boy? Just wondering because, on the one hand, i think boy has some strong positive connotations in the kink world, and, otoh, some strong negitive conotations in the African American culture.


Whats wrong with asking him if he minds it ?(especially if you are someone who uses "boy" as a default)
There without getting into the whole "raceplay" discussion I think there are some black men who would like it BECAUSE of how wrong it is...yet it still might not have the same emotional impact as some "stronger" words.

then again they may just be OK with it because they accept its implication in this scene and are able to seperate it from other implied meanings...

or they may just tell you its a hard limit.

The point is "just ask"

Personally: Slut is my first choice... Whore is my second. Bitch(for a guy)/DirtyGirl (for a woman) are my third choices...
my tone of voice combined with these words seem to get a good reation.

In the end though that is what its all about for me... which word will trigger the best reaction within that person.
Cheers
Skully

(in reply to tsatske)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 3:49:14 PM   
aidan


Posts: 904
Joined: 5/28/2005
Status: offline 		I always found it charming when a Domme called me "boy" or "sweetheart" or something similar when I was free-roaming.

_____________________________

Do what now?

"I aim to misbehave."
-Mal Reynolds

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 5:33:40 PM   
tsatske


Posts: 2037
Joined: 3/9/2007
From: Louisville, KY
Status: offline
quote:

Whats wrong with asking him if he minds it ?(especially if you are someone who uses "boy" as a default) There without getting into the whole "raceplay" discussion I think there are some black men who would like it BECAUSE of how wrong it is...yet it still might not have the same emotional impact as some "stronger" words. then again they may just be OK with it because they accept its implication in this scene and are able to seperate it from other implied meanings... or they may just tell you its a hard limit. The point is "just ask"


absolutely. I have known people, even played with people, who liked raceplay. asking is always the best answer. but if no one ever points out the possiblities to think through, then someone might not think of asking. that's the only reason i brought it into the conversation. Asking works. :)

_____________________________

“If you never did you should. These things are fun and fun is good”
~Dr. Seuss quote

(in reply to Skully7000)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 7:16:09 PM   
PsyVamp


Posts: 1026
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline 		My pet I call wolf, or adrian, or pup... brat... sweets.. sometimes I call him "baby" and at that point he accuses me of forgetting his name (I once said "I just call all guys "baby" and this way nobody gets upset if I get a name wrong... I was half joking)

Other submissives I refer to by the name used in the introduction.

Lady Jag

_____________________________

Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. .
Could a blue screen of death constitute being defenestrated?
~Owner of wolf~ (one of them, anyway)

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 7:23:51 PM   
MsLemon


Posts: 47
Joined: 1/3/2004
Status: offline 		I call my husband/property my lug but when he's in his object headspace he's My Unit .. Unit 0821 to be exact.
My girl is my mermaid beauty and the lug calls her j-nut (a special nick for her between them).

When I'm feeling all mushy I call them both my loves.

(in reply to PsyVamp)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 9:14:15 PM   
PhoenixRed


Posts: 174
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline 		Hmmm.  Well, I call most men "pup" when I meet them, whether they're older or younger than me.  That name stuck with my sub because he has a "puppy" personality.  My female switch is "sassy", because it fits her personality.  My youngest sub is "kitten" because he has a kitten-type personality. 

I usually give slaves a new D/s name.  I have them do a search for exotic and/or ethnic names that have some kind of symbolism or meaning and return a list of 4-6 names and their meanings to me.  Then I choose. For my slave...he found the names donkar (Latin, means 'humble') and umi (African, means 'servant') - I made a contracted name out of these two to create a name that meant 'humble searvant'.  His slave name is now "doumi" (pronounced "do-me")...he thought the double entendre was appropriate, as I did! lol 

I also call my subs sweetie, bitch or slut (if in the appropriate context), boy, etc.  Whatever strikes me at the moment.  hee hee

_____________________________

Everyone deserves a break from the person everyone else expects them to be.
In the great experiment known as evolution, evidently there are some people who's ancestors were in the control group.

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: different ways to address a submissive - 6/13/2008 9:24:16 PM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		I use pet and boy a lot, when I am feeling more emotionally attached to them it becomes My pet, or My boy which they generally love. I also use sweets, hon, honeybun, poppet and little one (especially effective when they are great big hulking critters!), darlin' boy, lovey ... yes I am just the affectionate type I guess! I tend to address people I've just met by the name given in the introduction or I ask if there's a nickname they prefer and then I will use that, otherwise, I will get generic and fall back on one or more of the above! My first hubby and a female work mate (who later became a good friend of Mine too) used to call each other serf-baby (for her) and Boss-baby (for him) ... that was cute and now I know about D/s, that could apply quite nicely! They used it cos she did all the work LOL! I am really liking boykin now though ... but I guess aidan might not want Us all to pinch it ...

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

_____________________________

Life is a song ... and I love singing it! (By me!)

(in reply to MsLemon)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2 3   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> different ways to address a submissive Page: [1] 2 3   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094