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cantilena -> RE: Cost of keeping a sub / slave. (6/19/2008 10:04:50 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: missturbation
Hair cut, colour and style = approx £80 / $157.89
Nail Extensions = £25 / $49.34
Waxing (full body) = £35 / $69.09
Clothing / footwear = £300 / $592.15
Books = £15 / $29.60
Food = £150 / $296.01
Cigarettes = £35 / $69.09
Total = £640 / $1263.17
Above is what it costs me to keep me for a month approximately. I haven't included rent / mortgage as i don't pay to live where i do. Accomodation is included with my job. I haven't included medical costs as in the Uk we have the national health service, but i know in USA it is privately paid for. I've probably also missed some pretty basic stuff off, but you get the gist.
Now if i was to give up my work etc for a Dom / Domme and be totally dependent on him / her it would be on the basis that i still am provided for in the style i provide for myself. I will say at this point that i do not think, im 99% certain that i could never give my career up and be dependent on someone else. Im far too independent for that. Would my provisal be unreasonable? I don't think so but i'm sure there are others here who would disagree.
Anyway i'm just wondering (and im pretty sure this has been asked before), how on earth do people fund others lives? If you are extremely rich or well paid i can see it, but what about those in normal every day jobs who aren't so well off?
So for those who do it, how do you support yourself and your subs /slaves?
Would you do it? If so why? If not why not?
Has it ever got you into debt?
Are you in debt because of it?
For us, the decision to embark in this way was a revolutionary turning point in our lives relative to dominance and submission. It was scarier, too, I might add, than just about any BDSM scenario or toy you might care to illustrate or show me... You want to talk about twue submission?
Until quite recently, I was a very established senior executive - as you say, extremely independent and very successful financially. It gave me an enormous sense of both personal enjoyment and of personal accomplishment.
The decision to leave all that and become totally dependent upon another was a hugely difficult task. Yet that's the decision we made. The event doesn't have a value to shock, and it doesn't have a value to titillate; in fact one looking in might (and does) see it as quite ordinary and vanilla. Yet this simple act carried great power as a springboard to another relationship level.
Obviously, he has the means to do this or we wouldn't have. Above all, he's an intelligent man. However, once in a position that a change could work on the balance sheet, it became more an exercise of getting past my own fear and insecurity. It became an exercise about trust. Took us about 2 years to get there, but as I said... nothing but nothing worked better us for us both to break barriers.
The actual dollars and cents of this are a little immaterial. It will come down to acceptable standards of living to both dom and sub. It will come down to resourcefulness and potential responsibilities. It might cost $500 for one sub's clothing per month and $5,000 for another. The actual values don't really enter into it in terms of how it can be done... Financially, it either can or it can't Cold calculation.
From my experience, what really drives the equation after the determination that the math works is whether it works for the relationship dynamic itself. At the risk of repeating myself... yes... it's very scary indeed. Speaking personally... I had to dig deep.
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