CallaFirestormBW
Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008 Status: offline
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Wow, I have issues with this on so many levels. First, how do you define "respect" -- because it sounds to me like what you're defining as 'respect' is actually "obedience", "capitulation" or "agreement". quote:
ORIGINAL: masterforRT It's obvious to me that no one here even begins to understand what I said in my first post. In order for BDSM to work, there has to be Dominants and submissives. For BDSM to work, submissives need to SUBMIT. For BDSM to work, there has to be a trust/belief that Dominants are what they claim to be and submissives are what they claim to be. In this case, things sure seem to have broken down! Here, subs distrust the credentials of ANY and ALL Dominants, unless they have had the opportunity to PROVE their dominance to THEM! Yes, if I were giving responsibility for my life and submission to someone, I would damned well want to see some evidence that xhe could handle what xhe was getting. For me, I learned about the people who became my Keepers by seeing them in person and getting to know them over time. If I am meeting someone that I don't know and haven't had time to get to know, I damned sure want either some time to get to know them or some evidence that they're what they claim to be. This is common bloody sense! It has nothing to do with dominance or submission -- it is human self-preservation. I offer information to anyone who is planning on submitting to me, and require it in return. quote:
Doms offer other Doms ZERO respect here. I offer other dominant individuals the same level of respect that I offer to any other human being that I don't know. I offer common courtesy. That doesn't mean I won't disagree with you -- we may have completely different experiences... which is the whole issue for me of "20 years' experience". Ok... great.. someone's been doing -something- for 20 years, but how do I know whether hir "experience" has any relevance to anything in the present circumstance? quote:
I'm sorry, but it just doesn't work that way in real life! Bullsh*t. People in every single walk of life and every profession are asked for their references. Why should it be any different just because you have "Dom" in your title? quote:
If I believed that I had the right to question the credentials of every police officer that pulled me over then I'd be spending a lot of time in jail! I simply have to trust that they are who they claim to be-until they show otherwise. Whether I personally like them or not, I have to respect their POSITION as an authority figure. This is what I spoke of in my original post-respecting the position. And from what I can see, not a single one of you 'got it'. Again, bullsh*t -- you have the right, as a citizen, to require identification from any officer of the law -- and they are required to provide it to you. This is one of our Constitutional rights, and you cannot be arrested for requesting both identification and, if your personal space is to be examined, a physical search warrant. Again -- respect is not automatic... and if an officer behaves in a manner that is inappropriate, you can bet your sweet ass I'll get his badge details and report his sorry ass. The uniform does not automatically invoke respect -- it is the behavior in uniform that compels respect. quote:
Are your collective minds THAT closed? My mind is actually very open -- just not so open that my brains fall out. quote:
What I speak of is called a leap of faith. I believe that the guy who just put on blue lights, pulled me over and got out of his car is a cop. I make that leap of faith. I treat him respectfully and usually get off with a warning. Could he be a fake? Possible-but unlikely! The point is that I make that leap of faith that he is who he claims to be-and then I respect his position as an authority figure. A number of women and several men in more than one state have been killed/raped by following this procedure and not requiring both a badge and sufficient time to examine that badge for legitimacy. Nuff said. quote:
It's the same with BDSM. If I walk into a dungeon and see a guy dressed in black tying up a woman, I make the leap of faith that he's a Domniant. I don't walk over to him and ask to see his resume or credentials. I don't quiz him on his knowlege. I make the ASSUMPTION that he's the real deal and treat him as such-with the respect that a Dominant should expect. Unless you're planning on playing with him, or are a DM, I wouldn't expect you to. quote:
I'm beginning to realize that this simply does not happen here. I'm beginning to realize that this is not real BDSM as I know and practice. It's a bunch of subs who whine and spend most of their time 'topping from the bottom' and a bunch of 'Doms' that let them get away with it. If that's what you want to do, then who am I to tell you otherwise? Go right ahead and believe/do whatever you want. In the first line of my profile it says; "I am the real deal. No more, no less". That describes me to a T. Frankly, I don't care if anyone here believes me and/or respects me or not-what I DO care about is when I walk into a Dungeon that I get the respect there that I deserve. And 99% of the time I do. I'm willing to accept those odds. This is the last I will say about this subject. Flame away all you want-I won't be reading what you write, as I'm outta here... Which is sure a completely "dominant" thing to do (tongue firmly planted in cheek)-- run away from all the folks who disagree with you because you don't want to hear your precious opinions getting shot down. Calla Firestorm
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*** Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!" "Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer
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