quote:

ORIGINAL: DreamsOfSpider

DarkVictory,

If I may, I'd like to ask a rather personal question. No need to answer if it bothers you to do so.

As an adult, have you ever been raped? Or been in a situation where you were afraid of being raped?

I may be making assumptions that I shouldn't make... but I see a straight, white, dominant male "defying the night to do its worst." Statistically speaking, you can "stand in the darkness" all night long... without risking what a woman does, walking through it at a brisk pace. Literally and metaphorically, both.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Roselaure

These are two different issues.  So I'll address them separately.  The idea that if you are careful enough nothing bad will happen is erroneous.  What constitutes reasonable caution varies from person to person and the more cautious don't have the right to impose their standards on the less cautious.

The idea that society should not be responsible for caring for the sick and infirm if their infirmity is in any way self inflicted is another.  It would be awfully hard to draw the line I think.  Any disease that is not purely congenital can be influenced by life choices.  How would society decide who was worth saving and who wasn't?  You eat bacon and cheese for 30 years and have a heart attack?  why should I pay for that?  You go to church and choke on a communion wafer?  You're on your own, pal. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: Maxwell67

quote:

ORIGINAL: Alumbrado
And expecting one's every whim, and the consequences therof to be catered to by people think that life can be made in some measure safer, isn't imposing?

Dream on. 

Hmmm.. I have not seen anyone claim that they were owed any special treatment for their behavior.  Sure there are claims from people who say they will TAKE special treatment for it, but they are talking about taking control of their environment, and owning their lives.  They are not talking about taking a hand out.  As to your having to shoulder some of the harm done by someone else's stupidity, that is going to happen, and no amount of bitching about it can change it.  Welcome to the concept of the Social Contract. There are anarchists and libertarians who might have themselves convinced that our species can exist without it, but only in a perfect world would that be possible.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Knight0Errant



[Note for clarity: I define 'harm' as injury that is not desired/consented-to and would have long-term unwanted consequences. There is a world of difference between deadly stab wounds and broken bones (harm by my defintion) and any consented-to abrasion, cut, brand, welt, etc.]

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkVictory

To you know who... but not you.

I don't like you, you're not my friend. You and your ilk, you fear the darkness. You make rules to push the darkness back. You drive 55, or at least think I should. You make your kids and friends wear bicycle helmets and motorcycle helmets, and seat belts. You know what is best for me and mine, and you're happy to dispense that advice. I'm not about to pay the fine for a passenger who refuses to wear their seatbelt. If you choose not to wear a helmet thats fine, but what makes you so special that you can diss those that decide to protect their brain cases? Many states also fine for that.Oh yeah baby. Obeying traffic laws makes me a weak person uhhuh. Not obeying laws makes you soooooo kewl I'm surprised you can stand yourself in all that coolness. Remember.. James Dean died early because he was too cool.

I don't like you. You fear the darkness, and you want to safety pad everything. You want kids to be seen and not heard, unless they're your kids. You want others to obey your rules for their own darned good. I only want those to obey rules when it directly effects me, its for my own darned good. If you're stupid there isn't much I can do except help pay your medical costs when you end up brain damaged because some idiot in a car cut off your motorcycle. Yup I add change to those jars on the counters by the registers.

No more playing out in the street until darkness and your mom force you in. No more camping out over night, just three friends and the night air, and being grown up and staying. No more being told to man up and hit back. No more being told to walk it off and stop crying. Hit back, get sued. Is the macho image really that important? Thats rather sad to me, letting a macho image or front rule your life.

You, and your type, you weaken what it is to be an adult. Those of us that stand on two feet and defy the night to do its worst, you fear and dislike us. We're throwbacks to an older age, more raw and primal than you want your world to be. I love how you lump such a wide variety of people together. A parent wanting to protect the skull of their little one riding a bike for the first time, someone unwilling to shell out money because you refuse to obey the law and wear your seatbelt.
Those aren't necessarily the same people that advocate using safe calls. But they certainly seem to be the same people in your post.

I have a message for you. Ready?

Fuck you. In the end, I will win. I will stand in the darkness, I will shave with a straight razor, and I will be an adult. If I fuck up, I take what I have coming, and I move on. You can lay down and moan. I will step over you. That out there, the thing you fear, that's the future coming, and it's coming like a freight train. Um so because I wear a seatbelt and typically obey the speed limit I'm going to lay down and moan? I only lay down and moan when he puts me in restraints. I don't fear the future unless you mean a future where I have to pay medical bills for a loved one that decided to be stupid.

You win?
That is wholly a matter of perspective. It isn't a contest to me and I find it a bit disturbing that people see life as a competition against total strangers. What is it inside of you that makes you feel you have to be better than others? I just don't get that entire concept. It sounds like something a teenager would write while railing against their parents rules.

Go ahead, make your safe calls, make your dire warnings. Live in that fear. Me, I refuse. BDSM is scary, dark, and passionate... when it's done right. How dare you try to kill that? Go on, take me out, I dare you. You can find me over here, in the dark corner... waiting. 'Live in fear'.... wrongo buddy. I love life and enjoy some risks. However I also obey things like seatbelt laws because I don't want to pay the fine and I've already gone through a windshield once.
No wonder you are in the dark corner, I see people that huddle in dark corners as hiding..not waiting.

Delightful 'My way is the only way, if you don't do it my way then there is a laundry list of faults in you' post.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkVictory


I remember long summer days playing with the neighborhood kids until the last twinkle of light, then running home for a really late dinner.  Mom hadn't seen us all day long and trusted us to take care of ourselves.  We did.  Walking along the tops of fences to get to the kumquats in the neighbor's yard and evading his dog.  Get bitten its your own damned fault.  Owning BB guns and later going rabbit hunting with the .22, at 12. 

Fighting a neighbor kid in the street, coming home bloody and being told "I hope you won, or your dad'll whip your ass".  Getting my ass whupped when I deserved it.  Being told to fight my own fights.  Growing up to do just that

Yeah, my kids wear helmets now, I wear a seatbelt.  I don't litter, I obey the law.  Got my first speeding ticket ever in the last 12 months.

That's not the point.

Life isnt' safe, and it never will be safe.  It isn't skydiving unless you jump out of an airplane.  Going to the mall and having a 'skydiving experience' where they blow air up your ass for five minutes is *much* safer... and it isnt skydiving.  Snorkelling isnt scuba, but it sure is safer. 

Safe, Sane, Consensual .... checking in after each flogger stroke... having the nanny DM present at all times.... making sure you dont offend anyone ever, reducing your play to the lowest common denominator of sanity, safety, consensuality... this is what I rail against.  In my world, it isn't even BDSM, its some kind of sport fucking with kneepads.  Maybe.  Hell, maybe there's not even gonna be any sex.  What's that leave? A massage with odd implements?

Nope, there is an edge out there.  There's a darkness out there.  An interplay of fear, actual real fear, passion... hot sweaty passionate fucking, and fun... adult fun with a certain wildness.  So yeah, wear the seatbelt, wear the helmet, shave with a mach-3, and hide in the light... but you know, there's something to be said for riding in the back of a pickup in the middle of the night to a swimming hole you don't know the location of with a girl you've just met... and intend to fuck the shit out of.  Pass the tequila, man.  Let the party begin.

quote:

ORIGINAL: impishlilhellcat


Yes I read what I wrote and I didn't argue for them I said I don't think they are entirely helpful, but should someone CHOOSE to use them they should be honored not ridiculed. I.E. not my cup of tea don't use them, but to each their own.

Did you read my post?